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Welcome friends, I am Dr. Hitesh Shah, a Sexologist from Mumbai. Once again welcome to this educational video series on Lybrate. Today's topic is Vaginismus. This is a fairly common disorder, sexual dysfunction in women and what does it means? Vaginismus means involuntary closure or spasm of vagina whenever there is an attempt at intercourse. Now this is of two types. First is the primary variety and the second is the secondary variety. Primary variety means which is from beginning. So when a woman gets married during first night of honeymoon when the couple discovers that she is not able to allow or go ahead with the penetrative intercourse and then she suddenly tends to close her thighs, it becomes too tight, tend to push away her husband and she experiences complete closure or involuntary closure of her vagina. So the penetration does not happen in this couple. They are not able to consummate their marriage. Now what is the reason for this involuntary closure of vagina. Obviously this is a kind of defensive or protective mechanism of mind and body. Why does it happens?
Often there are cases, there is a history of subconscious fear. The fear can be due to various reasons. Often there is a history of child sex abuse so during the childhood or teenage years they can be an abuse experience or sexual trauma to the girl. Also often there are psychological fear just because of hearing somebody else's experience of sister or brother or sister in law or friend who have passed through painful intercourse and this leads to severe fear in woman's mind. Then there are women who have such fearful personalities. They are very timid, very nervous type and they tend to have fear very easily. They are afraid of pain even when they go for blood test simple needle pricking they tend to faint or they see accident on the road, they see blood they tend to faint. So this kind of women who have very fearful personality, they tend to get vaginismus.
So women also passes through lot of agony and she just can't overcome her fear. Even if she has desire when the moment comes for penetration she is full of fear and she just can't allow her husband to move ahead or go ahead with the penetration part. As a result there is a lot of guilt inside her. She feels helpless, she feels very sorry, she feels responsible for not able to give pleasure or her happiness to husband. Obviously husband also passes through all kinds of frustration in spite of all his support to his wife. So as a result the couple lands up with a unconsummated marriage for lot of years. They cannot conceive and have a child and they live a very miserable life but there is a definite solution to this once we discover what is the underlying factors the reasons why the woman has developed that fear and there is a way to come out of it. There is a way, there is something called sex therapy, homeopathic medicines.
All this things beautifully helps the couple. Also there is second factor or secondary variety of vaginismus which is after some surgery or after a delivery when stitches are taken. So what happens is the opening becomes too narrow for the penetration. There could be some actual pain which leads to vaginal spasm or closure. So all these things needs to be properly diagnosed in the given case. Once the problem is diagnosed there is a perfect treatment for every case of vaginismus including homeopathic remedy which takes away the subconscious fear. So friends you are welcome for any kind of treatment or solution or guidance. I am Dr. Hitesh Shah on Lybrate.
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Hello Friends!
Welcome once again! I'm Dr. Hitesh Shah, a sexologist from Mumbai. So, our today's topic is low sexual desire in women. Well, this is a very common problem amongst our Indian population specially. The reasons are many. If we try to understand, why does a woman feel low desire or less interest in sex, we need to evaluate it at various level. Of course, there are women who have constitutionally low sexual desire but are few. Most of them have either psychological factors or relationship factors or many of them also have medical or hormonal factors. So, let's try to understand them in detail. Now, we must rule out all possible medical factors. Whenever a woman, especially when they come after marriage, the couple is frustrated/depressed because the woman feels she's not able to respond to her husband. Husband tries to cope up, tries to cooperate.
He's very understanding, but at the end of the day he's a man, he's a human being. He has his own desire and passion, he doesn't get response from wife so he's also frustrated. Many years pass through for many couple. Sometimes they come when they have pressure to conceive babies, sex life is just forgotten. So, even for conceiving, they need sex and the wife just doesn't feel the desire to have sex. And all of these also leads to various marital issues, disharmony, fights, quarrels or extramarital affair by husband or depression in wife or husband. So, it's very important that this problem is quickly communicated between the couple and they come to the doctor for the right treatment. Once the diagnosis is made, treatment is possible. So the common medical factors are any chronic disorders or disease in the system, person tends to feel low desire. Common hormonal problem in women like PCOS, hyperthyroidism and low haemoglobin - anaemia which are very common apart from diabetes which also cause low desire along with some lubrication disorders. So these are very common medical factors, so first we evaluate whether there are any medical factors or not.
If not, we simultaneously try to understand in detail the psychological relationship aspect. As for psychological reasons are concerned, we understand the makeup of the woman, the personality, the upbringing, the attitude, and the cognitive factors of the woman about sex. There are women who feel sex is bad, sinful, is just for having baby and something what animals do so one shouldn't indulge in sex except for having a baby. There are women who have negative impact about sex because they heard somebody’s experience of painful first night, or they have seen rape scenes in television or a movie or they have heard someone's experience which is very painful and they develop a kind of disinterest or aversion or they start camouflaging their own sexual desire. There are women who are very psychologically shy or reserve so they don't explore their own sexuality or they are also not free or they are too much controlled by their husband in the bed so their desire don't really come up and they also feel really ashamed that if they would feel free on the bed, then what would their husband think! So, these are all psychological complex or controls which a woman develops within herself.
It also can be her forced marriage, they don't want to marry the guy but are forced and they don't develop the sexual interest. There are few women who are probably having a lesbian orientation, the attraction for only same-sex so they don't indulge in sexual desires for the opposite sex. Then, there are relationship issues between husband and wife. They feel alone or left out, or not being loved by the their husband or not respected by their husband or issues within the joint family or in-laws. All these keep them indulged in stressed out situations. There are also working women who are working entire day, the kitchen, and they really feel fatigue after the entire day. There can be vitamin deficiency also, these can be due to lack of nutrition, so these all stresses are phases that every woman passes through at some stage of their life. And the stress leads to low desire in woman.
There are women who don't want to have baby so show less interest in sex. Also, they are women who want to conceive and there is more conceiving pressure than enjoying sex life. So, there are multiple reasons why women can have low sexual desires. There can be multiple factors as stated above. Any of these factors in given case, we can help the women out in experiencing the desire, we can help the couple out once, when diagnosed. Also, what is important is the sexual chemistry in the bed. What kind of foreplay they do, how husband is taking interest in woman, how he's boosting his self image as lots of woman lose their self image. They feel less appealing, less attractive, questioning whether their husband likes them or not or if, are attracted to someone else. These self esteem issues lead to low sexual desire. In short, we evaluate all these factors in every case and try to help the woman as an individual and both of them as the couple. So, problem can be sorted out and you both can get back to your privileges of happy marriage. Right? So all the best to you and in case of any queries or concern, you're welcome to meet us at Lybrate platform. I'm Dr. Hitesh Shah once again. See you again with some more educational videos.
Thank you!
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Hi friends!
I am Dr Hitesh Shah from Mumbai, Sex Educationist, Counselor therapist homeopath Wellness Consultant and corporate stress management expert.
So today's topic is non consummation of marriage or unconsummated marriages. Surprisingly many couples face this difficulty they had married yet they had virgin, means they cannot do penovaginal penetrative intercourse, surprise right. Well so we see lot of couples in fact in my field I am know as a super specialist to treat such couples who cannot consummate their marriages. To put in right perspective let me tell you there are so many categories under which different couple can fall into further reasons for unconsummated marriages- male factors, female factors, position posture and movement factors to name of few and the most prominent once. The common malefactors which can lead to non consummation are males inability to achieve or sustain a good erection number-1, number-2 to severe premature ejaculation where during foreplay itself the men tend to climates, number-3 severe phimosis and having painful attempt at intercourse these are the common malefactors, of course, some males are having very low sexual desires as well for some other reasons. So these are all common malefactors, of course male also pass lot of performance anxiety pressure or they tend to lose erection when they wear condom or take the position, so these are common malefactors. Coming to common female factors lot of females may not have sexual desires, there are female who have problem with lubrication, the lubrication disorder, then there are women who have severe phobia the penetration phobia with or without vaginismus, vaginismus is a painful or non painful contractions, involuntary contraction or spasm of vaginal walls when the husband is trying to do intercourse. So that it closes and husband cannot penetrate inside. Also there are issues like small opening, vaginal opening small interior or narrow or stiff or tough hymn or stiff vagina so these are the common female factors and there are various position factors lot of couples face difficulty in adopting the right posters in different position they try or even after adopting the right posture they don't know how to do the thrusting movement how to enter first and then do the thrusting moment. So we evaluate all these three categories in thorough detail this is a couples issues, often couple comes, is its husband problem or a wife problem but we assure them as a individual you both are normal, but the problem is coming in having a sexual union as a couple. So let's evaluate as a couple and come out of the blame game. Often non consummation of marriage leads to misunderstanding blame game, you know calling each other impotent or frigid and then things escalate into family and social tension even up to divorce. But if they come at the right time to the doctor things can be sorted out, often couple tend to live a very compromise life without sex. They go for even conceiving with IUI or IVF but without having intercourse they have children also but never had intercourse. So couple did not live such a compromise marriages and sex life, they can come and find out the solution. Unless one of them has a same sex orientation or is not interested in marriage due to another love affair or anything, or is having psychiatric illness, or some chronic illness, all these cases can be solved 100% that is kind of assured to every couple. And once we evaluate all the three categories and thus we pinpoint the specific factor in each given case, then we plan out the whole management. It is matter of time it can take one week, or one month, but couple soon start there complete sex life with penetrative intercourse in a very pleasurable way without any anxiety, tension, , depression, stress and they start living there fulfilling marriage life. So there is a complete solution for unconsummated marriage, don't feel shy, don't feel afraid things can be sorted out hundred percent absolutely with medical way, without surgery and proper guidance.
So you are welcome for any problem for any point of time. I am Dr Hitesh Shah in Mumbai you can contact me through Lybrate and get rid of your problem.
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Hi friends,
I am Dr Hitesh Shah sexologist, sex educationist, counsellor and therapist, a homeopath and a Wellness expert and also do corporate stress management, I am from Mumbai.
So once again welcome, today's topic is one of my favourite topic and that is pre marriage counselling. You must be wondering why to do pre marriage counselling, well friends see in every walk of life we educate yourself for example with studies from KG to Graduation to be able to earn on our livelihood, bread and butter. Even after that when we take a job or enter a profession or business we learn the system and processes, even after that we tend to make some other mistakes or accident, if you want to learn to drive a car to go for one month in the driving school then only you can avoid accidents and not only that you can also enjoy your driving and no innocent person will become victim of your rash on wrong driving. So you can understand importance of education and orientation in Every Walk of life, unfortunately the field of marriage, the relationship and specially the sex life is all taken for granted, there is no education about what marriage is, what concept of marriage is and that's the reason that you will see so very marriages in our society are mostly compromise, their potential is ultimate they can really create a heaven, if marriages are made in heaven you have the potential to create the heaven on the earth. But unfortunately we will see most of the couple fighting or there is communication gap, quarrels, arguments or even in severe cases a lot many times you see sexual dysfunctions forcibly incompatibility, sexual incompatibility, extramarital affairs, depressions, alcoholic and other addiction and of course worst thing to happen is often divorce. Now these things can be prevented and as I told you totally preventive, you can actually enrich your marriage life. If you have in time taken the right understanding and orientation to what marriage is. So what do we do in pre marriage counselling we teach the young couple what marriage is all about, the concept of marriage like from we were being a Sanskar in our culture, what it means to have a heart to heart communication empathising the art of communication, right from there to various element of relationship like love, care, affection, bonding so many other aspects and other of course A to Z about sex life, the foreplay, interplay, first intercourse. You will be surprise to know we get so many couples after marriage who are unconsummated, they have not able to consummate their marriage, means they cannot have penovaginal penetrative intercourse due to some or other reason. So couple learn before marriage, everything about relationship, marriage foreplay, interplay, male sexuality, female sexuality and even how to do first intercourse in different positions and satisfy each other with complete orgasm and fulfilment. And of course, we also take care of the premarital medical fitness from the angle of fertility and oral medical fitness. So pre med counselling is something like boon to mankind, to our society we can prevent so many marriages going to the rock getting divorce or Living a compromise marriage in the sex life. And I would request all the parents to give the children those who are going to get married, the gift of Pre marriage counselling program. So that they live lovely and a happy married life, thank you.
And to contact me myself Dr Hitesh Shah in Mumbai or online, you are always welcome to consult me through Lybrate. Thank you so much.
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Hi friends, I am Dr Hitesh Shah from Mumbai. I am a homoeopath, a wellness consultant and a sexologist. Our today’s topic in this series is premature ejaculation and its permanent solution with homoeopathy. Well, friends, premature ejaculation is something which affects millions of men, especially young age group and the victim of their suffering is their spouse, their partners. Because men reach his orgasm, men reach his culmination, men experience the whole bliss, early maybe, but who ultimately suffers is the women because they don’t experience their pleasure or orgasm. In fact, women have multiple orgasmic potentials, they can experience multiple orgasm unlike men who when reaches one orgasm, discharges and goes to sleep. But women can reach multiple orgasms, they are more powerful in sex than men. But unfortunately, most men are finding it difficult to take their women even for one orgasm. Why so? It’s because nature has made men reach orgasm fast so that they can deposit semen in a woman and there are higher chances of conceiving and the continuation of species tales place. But as a result, lots of couples are suffering miserably. So let’s find out what is this premature ejaculation and is there any permanent solution to this?
Basically, ejaculation is a physiological counterpart of men reaching orgasm in his psychosexual consciousness. So if a man reaches orgasm faster, early or quickly then he will ejaculate fast before his expectation or before his partner’s orgasm and that is called premature ejaculation.
Now when would man reach his orgasm fast or early? Orgasm is peak, it’s the destination, it’s the peak of pleasure. You will reach your destination fast if your speed is fast so, if your speed of excitement, sexual excitement is too fast then you will reach your orgasm also very fast. So essentially, premature ejaculation is early orgasmic response due to the fast pace of excitement.
Now, why do some men have a very fast pace of sexual excitement? Now a couple of reasons-
- From their teenage, their way of masturbating which is too fast they have done masturbation in a very quick manner. So their sexual response pattern develops in their own system. It’s a kind of programming which keeps repeating itself, autonomously. So every time they are in a sexual encounter situation, they respond fast.
- It’s out of hurry or anxiety. Some men suffer from anxiety of losing erection they are in a hurry that they may not lose the erection when they have got, achieved the erection during foreplay. So once they are in hurry, they hurriedly rush towards orgasm.
- There is another reason, many men have a hypersensitive glans penis, the head of the penis is too sensitive. So the moment they are inside woman’s vagina, they tend to have erotic bombarding, they are taken to orgasm fast. Also, some men are constitutionally too quick in their sexual response.
Now there is a way out. Now, traditionally, most men tend to take tablets, which are generally psychiatric medicines like dapoxetine, paroxetine, colonel. Now this medicine, what it does is because of their nature they are basically anti-anxiety and anti-depression but their side effect has been found that they block neuromuscular junction and hence they block ejaculation and hence it is used for premature ejaculation. Obviously, they are bound to have a lot of side effects. And the result remains, the benefit remains only for 24 hours. So, this is a solution which gives you temporary benefit with a risk of side effects. As against that, there is a classical solution. If you can manage to control your speed of excitement, if you can work with yourself, then you can even enjoy the whole journey and not just the destination.Toh is ke le aap ka khud pe control develop karna hona, khud he to develop control over your sexual pace of sexual excitement. You need to take certain natural remedies and homeopathy is a fantastic science and with thousands of patients’ treatment we have discovered that it works beautifully without side effects and long-term solution. So you can develop a very good control on your pace of excitement, you can enjoy the journey. You can take your partner to climax and then reach your own climax. Also if the local area is hypersensitive, it needs to be treated and this we integrate with certain ancient techniques and modern techniques and the natural remedies
. Everything together brings about a beautiful transformation in your sexual response patterns and not only you will be happy with your prolonged time and the quality of pleasure but you will also make your partner reach her orgasm maybe even multiple orgasms very soon. So there is a perfect solution to this problem. Don’t feel miserable, don’t lose hope, your confidence will come back. You’re a complete man, the only thing is that your speed is too fast, and you’re not able to control it. And we’ll help you out, don’t worry.
So you’re always welcome for all the solution for any query feel free to contact and you can always contact us through lybrate.
Thank you so much. Bye.
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Homeopathy treatment for Erectile Dysfunction
Welcome friends, I’m Dr. Hitesh Shah. I am a homeopath and a wellness consultant, and a sexologist in Mumbai. Today our topic is Erectile Dysfunction and homeopathy.
First let me make you understand What erectile dysfunction is. Basically, erection is due to rush of blood which involves your penile tissue and men get erection in order to have adequate intercourse. So if he cannot achieve a good erection, or if he achieves but cannot sustain a good erection and not able to have satisfactory intercourse, it is labeled as erectile dysfunction.
There are many Reasons when a man starts experiencing erectile dysfunction.
Broadly it is divided into two categories: one, psychological or situational, the other one is medical factors.
Now psychological factors play a very important role. See, if you understand the while Psychophysiology of erection it is an entire circuit from your mind, nervous system, and the blood flow. So I will explain you how sex is basically in your mind. Aap kuch sochte hain, dekhte hain, so five senses sabda, sparsh, roop, ras, gandh, and Kalpana, your imagination. Five senses and imagination triggers sexual desire in your mind. Now this mental excitement, this sexual excitement comes in your nervous system, the brain. Brain mate is in the form of electrical impulses. From there it travels via the sinal cord up to the lower part of the back. From there the messages travel of sexual excitement through the peripheral nerves to the private part of the blood vessels. Blood vessel gets stimulated, it opens up and there is a rush of blood. Man gets erection, woman gets lubrication. So if your entire circuit is proper – mind, nervous system, nerves, and blood vessel and blood flow, erection would be good. So mind mein agar sukoon hai, if you are relaxed and if you have love affection for your partner, if there is a very good passion level, the desire level would be great. So sexual desire messages are in a good quality. And then if your nervous system is in a good health, it will travel in through it very well. If blood vessels are elastic it will open up. If blood flow is good, erection will be good.
So again, if there are problem at any of these levels, there will be problem with the erection. In mind, what can be the problem? Suppose the man suffers with lot of stress, work area stress, financial stress,s family stress, responsibilities, day-to-day struggle, in that case, is mind is filled up with stress. So at the time of sex he is preoccupied with stressful negative vibrations. So the quality of vibration that could get generated is not good enough. Or he may also suffer with performance anxiety because last time he met with some failure, it enters his head, and he is conscious, he is nervous, he is not sure whether he’ll get erection again or not, and he has a fear, fear of losing erection. If I am getting erection will it stay there? Will I be able to perform? Will I be able to satisfy my partner? So all this anxiety envelops his mind. Agar mind mein sex hain toh neeche sex aayega, provided medically you’re also perfect. But if the sex is disrupte, if your sexual excitement get disrupted, you lose excitement in your mind and hence you lose erection, it went down. So these are called broadly psychological or situational erectile dysfunction. The next category is medical erectile dysfunction. Now, major reasons are alcohol, smoking, high blood pressure, diabetes, low testosterone, which is a sex hormone level, thyroid disorders, these are the common, and high cholesterol and triglycerides.
Now let’s understand how it affects your circuit of erectile physiology. The diabetes and alcohol, they affect your nervous system. Alcohol ignites your passion but takes away performance. Toh log alcohol lete hain, they get, you know, uninhibited, sab control chale jate hain, lekin over a period of time, unka performance pe effect aata hin, because alcohol is a central nervous system depressant. That is why jo message transmit hota hai, apko desire toh ho rahi hain mind mein, you get the desire, but the messages do not transfer via the spinal cord and the peripheral nerves. Same thing happens with diabetes. It’s called diabetic neuropathy. So ultimately what happens, we have desire, but there is no erection happening in the organ, because messages do not reach up to the blood vessel.
Now let’s come to blood vessel and blood flow. In a condition of hypertension, and those who are on nicotine, jo gutkha khate hain, supari khate hain, mawa khate hain, or smoking and even drugs for that matter, or hookah, all these affects your blood vessels, and it constricts your blood vessels, the blood flow reduces in every organ of the body. For that matter, even brain, heart, lung, kidney, sex, pancreas, legs, it can lead to paralysis, heart attacks, lung cancer kidney failure, diabetes, blood pressure, erectile dysfunction and gangrene. So nicotine is the worst enemy of your heath and sex life, so is alcohol. So due to nicotine your blood vessel will get constricted, it will lose its elasticity, blood flow will not take place, even if you have desire, even if messages travel via the your nervous system, blood vessel do not open up adequately, so blood flow doesn’t happen, so you get erectile dysfunction. Coming to blood flow itself, blood is generally very thin, it keeps running like water, so wherever there is demand it will go there. If you’re doing mental work it will go to brain, if you eat some food it will go to stomach, if you exercise, the blood will go to your extremities. And when you have sex, blood goes to the pelvic region, and blood gets engorged, or accumulated in the penile tissue, and one gets the erection. But agar blood samjho thick ho jaye, blood density increases, it’s like in water if you put sugar or oil, the water will become thick, and it will not run smoothly.
Same way it happens in high cholesterol or high triglyceride which is high fat in your blood. Or if sugar increases like in diabetes, so if you put sugar in water, how the water becomes thick, so blood also becomes thick. So even if there is desire, messages travel, blood vessel open up, but the speed of blood flow is too slow to give you a good erection, or help you sustain a good erection. Now you must be wondering how to come out of this situation. So what we do as a sexologist we first try to evaluate your entire life, your health, what are the reasons, your habits, your lifestyle, why you are falling prey to this problem of erectile dysfunction. And once we properly evaluate what are the factors in your case, accordingly we help you out. Now there are two ways to help you out. One is a shortcut, instant result, and a lot of patients come to us who have taken medicines which is known as Viagra and all those medicines, but it helps you for 24 hours.
So what is ideal, the second route is the classical way, where you have to deal with the underlying root factors. So if we deal with your stress, if we deal with your performance anxiety, if we deal with the effect of alcohol on your system, effect of nicotine on your system, if your high BP, diabetes, if we deal with all that, and if it also help you with if you have any relationship issue with your wife, of your performance anxiety. If we help you on these levels, or thyroid dysfunction or low testosterone levels, all these can be helped out adequately. So after evaluation we find out the reason and for each reason, we go for a proper treatment to deal with the underlying root cause, with homeopathy. Only homeopathy has this power to deal with these underlying factors. And we integrate this with counseling and lifestyle management.
So I am sure today every man can come out of his erectile dysfunction. Allopathy is a bull, it can help you instantly with Viagra, with pepper or any injection, with a vacuum pump, and there is also something called penile implant surgery available. Again if you want to go for natural solution, long-term solution, homeopathy is the best. No side effects, no dependence. So always live a happy life, always live a healthy lifestyle, and get rid of all the stress in your mind and always exercise well. Certain nutritions, foods are very important. So we give wholesome guidance on all this. And we can help you out to get rid of your erectile dysfunction forever, without any dependence on any medicine, and naturally and without side effects.
I am sure you are motivated to live a very healthy, wealthy and sexy life. You’re always welcome for any question any query, and you can reach to us through Lybrate. Thank you.
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As time progresses in a relationship, the sizzle somehow fizzles out, and sex does not bring the same excitement as it used to. However, sex is one of the best ways to keep the relationship lively and young. Despite the hectic lifestyle and the weariness that sets in, there are definitely some simple things that can add some spice to your life and pump a new lease of life into the relationship. What was initially
spontaneous needs some forceful trying with time.
Listed below are some tips that can help you sizzle up your sex life.
- Simple touches: Remember that sex need not happen in the bedroom when the lights are off. Routine, regular touches which could include holding hands and a peck on the cheek can help keep the interest alive. Make it a routine to do this every day, at a chosen time of the day.
- Fix up a date: Even if it sounds forced, block one day of the week as your date day. If possible, go out for a dinner which will bring a change of place. Cook some aphrodisiac foods like onion, celery, asparagus could add to the magic.
- Go lingerie shopping together: This could be one nice way to rekindle interest, and along the way, you might end up with some nice fancy stuff.
- Watch adult movies together: This definitely will bring you in the mood. If you are both game, then you could watch something different and even end up trying. It has been proven that a person's preferences in bed change with time, and the new positions and forms might bring back the eagerness to indulge in the act more often.
- Try different place, different time: This could be something like spending time in the shower together, or in the pool, or even spending a night in a hotel for a change. The routine home environment sometimes just sucks away the energy and mood required for sex.
- Frank discussion: As much as it might seem difficult, try having a frank discussion with your partner about how they feel about sex - would they like to turn anything, why there is less of it in general, etc.
- Work out: Exercise to show that you are interested in keeping yourself in shape and healthy. This definitely will kindle interest in the other person.
- Read about sex: There are some sex facts including how it helps cure headaches, is the best cure for cold, is more effective than half an hour of running, frequent ejaculations reduce chances or prostate cancer, etc.
And these are some sure ways to improve your sex life.
Hello!
Welcome friends, I am Dr. Hitesh Shah, a Sexologist from Mumbai. Once again welcome to this educational video series on Lybrate. Today's topic is Vaginismus. This is a fairly common disorder, sexual dysfunction in women and what does it means? Vaginismus means involuntary closure or spasm of vagina whenever there is an attempt at intercourse. Now this is of two types. First is the primary variety and the second is the secondary variety. Primary variety means which is from beginning. So when a woman gets married during first night of honeymoon when the couple discovers that she is not able to allow or go ahead with the penetrative intercourse and then she suddenly tends to close her thighs, it becomes too tight, tend to push away her husband and she experiences complete closure or involuntary closure of her vagina. So the penetration does not happen in this couple. They are not able to consummate their marriage. Now what is the reason for this involuntary closure of vagina. Obviously this is a kind of defensive or protective mechanism of mind and body. Why does it happens?
Often there are cases, there is a history of subconscious fear. The fear can be due to various reasons. Often there is a history of child sex abuse so during the childhood or teenage years they can be an abuse experience or sexual trauma to the girl. Also often there are psychological fear just because of hearing somebody else's experience of sister or brother or sister in law or friend who have passed through painful intercourse and this leads to severe fear in woman's mind. Then there are women who have such fearful personalities. They are very timid, very nervous type and they tend to have fear very easily. They are afraid of pain even when they go for blood test simple needle pricking they tend to faint or they see accident on the road, they see blood they tend to faint. So this kind of women who have very fearful personality, they tend to get vaginismus.
So women also passes through lot of agony and she just can't overcome her fear. Even if she has desire when the moment comes for penetration she is full of fear and she just can't allow her husband to move ahead or go ahead with the penetration part. As a result there is a lot of guilt inside her. She feels helpless, she feels very sorry, she feels responsible for not able to give pleasure or her happiness to husband. Obviously husband also passes through all kinds of frustration in spite of all his support to his wife. So as a result the couple lands up with a unconsummated marriage for lot of years. They cannot conceive and have a child and they live a very miserable life but there is a definite solution to this once we discover what is the underlying factors the reasons why the woman has developed that fear and there is a way to come out of it. There is a way, there is something called sex therapy, homeopathic medicines.
All this things beautifully helps the couple. Also there is second factor or secondary variety of vaginismus which is after some surgery or after a delivery when stitches are taken. So what happens is the opening becomes too narrow for the penetration. There could be some actual pain which leads to vaginal spasm or closure. So all these things needs to be properly diagnosed in the given case. Once the problem is diagnosed there is a perfect treatment for every case of vaginismus including homeopathic remedy which takes away the subconscious fear. So friends you are welcome for any kind of treatment or solution or guidance. I am Dr. Hitesh Shah on Lybrate.
Hello Friends!
Welcome once again! I'm Dr. Hitesh Shah, a sexologist from Mumbai. So, our today's topic is low sexual desire in women. Well, this is a very common problem amongst our Indian population specially. The reasons are many. If we try to understand, why does a woman feel low desire or less interest in sex, we need to evaluate it at various level. Of course, there are women who have constitutionally low sexual desire but are few. Most of them have either psychological factors or relationship factors or many of them also have medical or hormonal factors. So, let's try to understand them in detail. Now, we must rule out all possible medical factors. Whenever a woman, especially when they come after marriage, the couple is frustrated/depressed because the woman feels she's not able to respond to her husband. Husband tries to cope up, tries to cooperate.
He's very understanding, but at the end of the day he's a man, he's a human being. He has his own desire and passion, he doesn't get response from wife so he's also frustrated. Many years pass through for many couple. Sometimes they come when they have pressure to conceive babies, sex life is just forgotten. So, even for conceiving, they need sex and the wife just doesn't feel the desire to have sex. And all of these also leads to various marital issues, disharmony, fights, quarrels or extramarital affair by husband or depression in wife or husband. So, it's very important that this problem is quickly communicated between the couple and they come to the doctor for the right treatment. Once the diagnosis is made, treatment is possible. So the common medical factors are any chronic disorders or disease in the system, person tends to feel low desire. Common hormonal problem in women like PCOS, hyperthyroidism and low haemoglobin - anaemia which are very common apart from diabetes which also cause low desire along with some lubrication disorders. So these are very common medical factors, so first we evaluate whether there are any medical factors or not.
If not, we simultaneously try to understand in detail the psychological relationship aspect. As for psychological reasons are concerned, we understand the makeup of the woman, the personality, the upbringing, the attitude, and the cognitive factors of the woman about sex. There are women who feel sex is bad, sinful, is just for having baby and something what animals do so one shouldn't indulge in sex except for having a baby. There are women who have negative impact about sex because they heard somebody’s experience of painful first night, or they have seen rape scenes in television or a movie or they have heard someone's experience which is very painful and they develop a kind of disinterest or aversion or they start camouflaging their own sexual desire. There are women who are very psychologically shy or reserve so they don't explore their own sexuality or they are also not free or they are too much controlled by their husband in the bed so their desire don't really come up and they also feel really ashamed that if they would feel free on the bed, then what would their husband think! So, these are all psychological complex or controls which a woman develops within herself.
It also can be her forced marriage, they don't want to marry the guy but are forced and they don't develop the sexual interest. There are few women who are probably having a lesbian orientation, the attraction for only same-sex so they don't indulge in sexual desires for the opposite sex. Then, there are relationship issues between husband and wife. They feel alone or left out, or not being loved by the their husband or not respected by their husband or issues within the joint family or in-laws. All these keep them indulged in stressed out situations. There are also working women who are working entire day, the kitchen, and they really feel fatigue after the entire day. There can be vitamin deficiency also, these can be due to lack of nutrition, so these all stresses are phases that every woman passes through at some stage of their life. And the stress leads to low desire in woman.
There are women who don't want to have baby so show less interest in sex. Also, they are women who want to conceive and there is more conceiving pressure than enjoying sex life. So, there are multiple reasons why women can have low sexual desires. There can be multiple factors as stated above. Any of these factors in given case, we can help the women out in experiencing the desire, we can help the couple out once, when diagnosed. Also, what is important is the sexual chemistry in the bed. What kind of foreplay they do, how husband is taking interest in woman, how he's boosting his self image as lots of woman lose their self image. They feel less appealing, less attractive, questioning whether their husband likes them or not or if, are attracted to someone else. These self esteem issues lead to low sexual desire. In short, we evaluate all these factors in every case and try to help the woman as an individual and both of them as the couple. So, problem can be sorted out and you both can get back to your privileges of happy marriage. Right? So all the best to you and in case of any queries or concern, you're welcome to meet us at Lybrate platform. I'm Dr. Hitesh Shah once again. See you again with some more educational videos.
Thank you!
A sexual dysfunction or sexual health problem is an issue that may occur at any period of the sexual cycle. Sexual issues affect both, men and women.
Sexual dysfunction in men can be a consequence of a physical or mental issues, including stress.
The problems men may encounter include:
- Erectile dysfunction (ED): ED can be a cause of medications, for example, diabetes or hypertension, or by anxiety about engaging in sexual relations. Dejection, weariness, and anxiety can add to it.
- Ejaculation issues: These include untimely (discharge that happens too soon during intercourse) and the powerlessness to discharge by any means. The causes include medicines, like antidepressants, nervousness about sex, a past filled with sexual injury and trauma, (for example, an accomplice being unfaithful), and guilt.
- Low libido: Mental issues like anxiety and tension about engaging in sexual relations can prompt a diminished or no sexual craving. Diminished hormone levels (especially if testosterone is low), physical ailments, and pharmaceutical symptoms can lessen the testosterone.
In many cases, sexual dysfunction in women might include:
- Vaginal dryness: This can lead to issues with excitement and craving, as sex can be painful when the vagina is not lubricated. Vaginal dryness can come about because of hormonal changes that happen during and after menopause or while breastfeeding, for instance. Mental issues, similar to tension about sex, can also cause vaginal dryness.
- Low drive: Absence of sexual yearning can be created by lower levels of the hormone estrogen. Exhaustion, misery, and tension prompts low charisma.
- Trouble achieving orgasm: Failure to have an orgasm can influence both men and women. Once more, some stimulant drugs can likewise bring about a solution for these issues.
- Pain during sex: Known as vulvodynia or vulvar vestibulitis, and even vaginismus, these conditions can bring about spasms that lead to pain during intercourse.
If you are encountering sexual health problems, raise your worries with your specialist. You can regularly redress your issue by:
- Getting the best possible treatment of any hidden therapeutic condition
- Speaking with your partner transparently about your sexual relationship
- Keeping away from liquor, smoking, and medication use
- Overseeing anxiety, uneasiness, and gloom
- If you think you are suffering from any other ailment, discuss with your specialist about therapy that can help you in such a case.
- Restorative treatment: This includes treatment of any physical issue that might add to a man's sexual problems.
- Drugs: Medications, for example, Cialis, Levitra, Staxyn, Stendra, or Viagra may enhance erectile capacity in men by improving the blood stream to the penis.
- Mental treatment: Therapy with a prepared advisor can help address sentiments of uneasiness, apprehension, or blame.
- Education about sex and sexual practices and reactions may also help.
In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
Severe pain during intercourse causes difficulty in a relationship in both partners. Sometimes a sustained occurrence of pain might be an indication of some serious medical dysfunction. As such, consult a doctor as soon as the pain arises. Contrary to popular beliefs, sexual pain can occur in both male and female.
In female, the reasons behind the painful sexual intercourse might be:
- Vaginismus, a condition when the vaginal muscles tighten up mainly due to anxiety or fear and cause significant pain with a tearing sensation.
- The pain can arise due to vaginal infection due to yeast or any form of sexually transmitted disease or pelvic inflammatory diseases.
- A severe injury in the vagina during childbirth or any other accident and psychological stress can also cause severe pain during sex.
- Sometimes, uterine or menopause problems (formation of fibroids in the uterus) can also cause pain.
- Cyst formation in the ovary or endometriosis (when the inner tissue lining of the uterus tends to grow outside) can also cause severe pain during intercourse.
Among men:
- Some men can experience pain during intercourse because of allergy to the fluids of the vagina or the chemical content of certain contraceptives.
- You can experience pain because of undiagnosed sexually transmitted diseases like herpes or gonorrhea
- The pain might also occur due to urinary tract infections or side effects from certain medications.
- Severe pain just a few moments before ejaculation can be a result of inflammation of the prostate glands and should be immediately diagnosed as it might be a signal of prostate cancer.
For treating pain during sex in female, you should opt for the following procedures
- If the pain is caused due to vaginal dryness after menopause, you should consider the application of prescribed lubricants or jellies to reduce the pain.
- If the pain occurs due to severe anxiety or stress, sex therapy can help you improve physical intimacy.
- If there are other symptoms like severe bleeding or irregular periods in addition to the pain, a visit to the physician is recommended.
Quite similarly in men
- If the pain occurs due to severe anxiety or stress, sex therapy can help you improve physical intimacy.
- If the pain results from side effects of certain medications, you should try changing your prescribed medication after doctor’s suggestion.
- In extreme cases, the doctors might suggest hormone replacement surgery.
In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
Sexual intercourse for humans is not only a reproductive act, but is also considered to be an emotional and pleasurable act. However, statistics report that almost 30% of the women experience pain during intercourse. This not only hampers the pleasure, but is also an unhealthy sign since it is indicative of a problem.
Painful intercourse could be a regular occurrence, or a sporadic one. There could be numerous reasons that cause the discomfort and pain. Though it might be an early manifestation of grave diseases such as endometriosis or fibroids, but more often, it is triggered due to conditions such as vaginal dryness, yeast infection, bacterial vaginiosis, which can be easily treated. It is pertinent to understand that it is not the physical infirmity of the entire female anatomy that causes such pain/ discomfort, but the existence of certain conditions that can be treated by a medical practitioner.
Certain such causal factors associated with painful intercourse and the efficient ways to deal with them are discussed below:
1. Vaginal dryness- Vaginal dryness is one of the most commonly cited causes for painful intercourse. There are various causal factors of vaginal dryness. These include, but are not limited to, consumption of certain drugs, bathing with hot water, health conditions or even lack of foreplay. Vaginal dryness due to the aforementioned causes is a short-lived condition that can be treated well with the help of a medical practitioner.
Usage of lubricants that is suitable for you, as advised by a medical practitioner, could go a long way in aiding the ease of sexual intercourse. The lubricants act as an effective substitute, if the body is unable to naturally secrete vaginal fluids to ease intercourse, thereby greatly reducing the pain that is experienced.
2. Improper vaginal expansion- The female anatomy is designed in such a way that it expands normally during intercourse. Proper foreplay enables the woman to get excited, which results in the release of vaginal fluids that aids in sexual intercourse. However, in the event that the female is not excited enough prior to the act, sexual intercourse can become a painful act, since the vagina is unable to expand in the absence of vaginal fluids. In such cases, take things slow and give your body time to comfortably go with the flow.
3. Vaginal itching caused by infection- Vaginal infections can be caused by antibiotics, prior sexual activity that has resulted in contraction of Sexually Transmitted Diseases etc. This results in an itching or burning sensation while having sex. It is essential to rest your body instead of forcing things, and to consult your doctor as soon as possible. The doctor can correctly diagnose the causal factors behind the infection, and prescribe the necessary medicines for it.
However, if your symptoms vary from the common ones mentioned above, or in case you have a different query, it is always advisable to consult the doctor. In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
Hi friends,
I am Dr Hitesh Shah sexologist, sex educationist, counsellor and therapist, a homeopath and a Wellness expert and also do corporate stress management, I am from Mumbai.
So once again welcome, today's topic is one of my favourite topic and that is pre marriage counselling. You must be wondering why to do pre marriage counselling, well friends see in every walk of life we educate yourself for example with studies from KG to Graduation to be able to earn on our livelihood, bread and butter. Even after that when we take a job or enter a profession or business we learn the system and processes, even after that we tend to make some other mistakes or accident, if you want to learn to drive a car to go for one month in the driving school then only you can avoid accidents and not only that you can also enjoy your driving and no innocent person will become victim of your rash on wrong driving. So you can understand importance of education and orientation in Every Walk of life, unfortunately the field of marriage, the relationship and specially the sex life is all taken for granted, there is no education about what marriage is, what concept of marriage is and that's the reason that you will see so very marriages in our society are mostly compromise, their potential is ultimate they can really create a heaven, if marriages are made in heaven you have the potential to create the heaven on the earth. But unfortunately we will see most of the couple fighting or there is communication gap, quarrels, arguments or even in severe cases a lot many times you see sexual dysfunctions forcibly incompatibility, sexual incompatibility, extramarital affairs, depressions, alcoholic and other addiction and of course worst thing to happen is often divorce. Now these things can be prevented and as I told you totally preventive, you can actually enrich your marriage life. If you have in time taken the right understanding and orientation to what marriage is. So what do we do in pre marriage counselling we teach the young couple what marriage is all about, the concept of marriage like from we were being a Sanskar in our culture, what it means to have a heart to heart communication empathising the art of communication, right from there to various element of relationship like love, care, affection, bonding so many other aspects and other of course A to Z about sex life, the foreplay, interplay, first intercourse. You will be surprise to know we get so many couples after marriage who are unconsummated, they have not able to consummate their marriage, means they cannot have penovaginal penetrative intercourse due to some or other reason. So couple learn before marriage, everything about relationship, marriage foreplay, interplay, male sexuality, female sexuality and even how to do first intercourse in different positions and satisfy each other with complete orgasm and fulfilment. And of course, we also take care of the premarital medical fitness from the angle of fertility and oral medical fitness. So pre med counselling is something like boon to mankind, to our society we can prevent so many marriages going to the rock getting divorce or Living a compromise marriage in the sex life. And I would request all the parents to give the children those who are going to get married, the gift of Pre marriage counselling program. So that they live lovely and a happy married life, thank you.
And to contact me myself Dr Hitesh Shah in Mumbai or online, you are always welcome to consult me through Lybrate. Thank you so much.
Hi friends!
I am Dr Hitesh Shah from Mumbai, Sex Educationist, Counselor therapist homeopath Wellness Consultant and corporate stress management expert.
So today's topic is non consummation of marriage or unconsummated marriages. Surprisingly many couples face this difficulty they had married yet they had virgin, means they cannot do penovaginal penetrative intercourse, surprise right. Well so we see lot of couples in fact in my field I am know as a super specialist to treat such couples who cannot consummate their marriages. To put in right perspective let me tell you there are so many categories under which different couple can fall into further reasons for unconsummated marriages- male factors, female factors, position posture and movement factors to name of few and the most prominent once. The common malefactors which can lead to non consummation are males inability to achieve or sustain a good erection number-1, number-2 to severe premature ejaculation where during foreplay itself the men tend to climates, number-3 severe phimosis and having painful attempt at intercourse these are the common malefactors, of course, some males are having very low sexual desires as well for some other reasons. So these are all common malefactors, of course male also pass lot of performance anxiety pressure or they tend to lose erection when they wear condom or take the position, so these are common malefactors. Coming to common female factors lot of females may not have sexual desires, there are female who have problem with lubrication, the lubrication disorder, then there are women who have severe phobia the penetration phobia with or without vaginismus, vaginismus is a painful or non painful contractions, involuntary contraction or spasm of vaginal walls when the husband is trying to do intercourse. So that it closes and husband cannot penetrate inside. Also there are issues like small opening, vaginal opening small interior or narrow or stiff or tough hymn or stiff vagina so these are the common female factors and there are various position factors lot of couples face difficulty in adopting the right posters in different position they try or even after adopting the right posture they don't know how to do the thrusting movement how to enter first and then do the thrusting moment. So we evaluate all these three categories in thorough detail this is a couples issues, often couple comes, is its husband problem or a wife problem but we assure them as a individual you both are normal, but the problem is coming in having a sexual union as a couple. So let's evaluate as a couple and come out of the blame game. Often non consummation of marriage leads to misunderstanding blame game, you know calling each other impotent or frigid and then things escalate into family and social tension even up to divorce. But if they come at the right time to the doctor things can be sorted out, often couple tend to live a very compromise life without sex. They go for even conceiving with IUI or IVF but without having intercourse they have children also but never had intercourse. So couple did not live such a compromise marriages and sex life, they can come and find out the solution. Unless one of them has a same sex orientation or is not interested in marriage due to another love affair or anything, or is having psychiatric illness, or some chronic illness, all these cases can be solved 100% that is kind of assured to every couple. And once we evaluate all the three categories and thus we pinpoint the specific factor in each given case, then we plan out the whole management. It is matter of time it can take one week, or one month, but couple soon start there complete sex life with penetrative intercourse in a very pleasurable way without any anxiety, tension, , depression, stress and they start living there fulfilling marriage life. So there is a complete solution for unconsummated marriage, don't feel shy, don't feel afraid things can be sorted out hundred percent absolutely with medical way, without surgery and proper guidance.
So you are welcome for any problem for any point of time. I am Dr Hitesh Shah in Mumbai you can contact me through Lybrate and get rid of your problem.
Self pleasuring is a normal process during the growing up years and later on in life too. It is recommended by doctors to promote overall health. A lot of times, self pleasuring is a good way to relieve the pent up sexual feelings. The issue, however, is when people (both men and women) get addicted to it and start depending on it for pleasure.
It is a pleasurable act, and therefore especially in the early years of life, it can become an addiction. People also tend to use it to beat loneliness, when they are excited sexually, and of course, to beat boredom. Indulging in it more than 3 to 4 times a week can be normal. However, if there is an urge to masturbate multiple times daily, it is time for concern. Continued into the 20s, there are harmful physical and psychological problems as a result of over-masturbation, as noted below:
- Anxiety: Masturbation puts people in a very comfortable position and therefore when there is a partner to go with, there are anxiety issues relating to size, stamina, and ways to please the partner. The performance anxiety which is quite common can be very high in over-masturbators. Both males and females with this habit can face sexual exhaustion and recurrent genital infections also.
- Chronic fatigue: Masturbation induces the production of the steroid hormone, cortisol. This increases the rate of metabolism and therefore leads to an exhausted and fatigued feeling.
- Back pain or discomfort: Over masturbation reduces the production of oxytocin, DHEA, testosterone and DHT. The depletion of these neurochemicals triggers a release of the inflammatory hormone prostaglandin E2, which is one source for lower-back pain.
- Groin and/or testicular discomfort and pain: There is a loop between the pituitary-adrenal-testicular glands, which is responsible for production of oxytocin and testosterone production. These have anti-inflammatory properties and over-masturbation tends to reduce this production. This leads to a groin pain which can extend into the testicles and continue chronically.
- Penis shrinkage: When started early in life, the amount of growth hormones in the body reduces with over-masturbation. This leads to inadequate amount of hormones for the penis to grow to its full size, leading to a smaller organ.
- Premature ejaculation: Again, the reduction in hormones including testosterone and other neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin leads to a weak parasympathetic nervous system. The result is a weaker erection, sperm leakage, and premature ejaculation.
- Hair loss: The hormone and neurotransmitter reaction also leads in high levels of prolactin and DHEA in the body, leading to hair loss.
As seen from above, over-masturbation does have a lot of side effects and it is better to treat it early on when you realize it is an issue.
In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!