My parents separated when I was 3. I have been victim of domestic violence by my elder sibling since childhood. He has beaten me and my mother always I think he has anger issues and has bossed around me countless number of time. But now he is better now. 2 years back a friend of mine encourage me to masturbate and I got addicted to it. And I have been depressed and suicidal since long time I also have been very close to killing my self once. But there have been period when I used to feel very high between these years that make me doubt if I have Bipolar Disorder. I also suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. And I think it's all due to addiction of masturbation. I can't really stop it. My longest streak without doing it was 6 days but then I started to feel anxious and panic attacks and then I relapsed. I am tired most of the time. Have serious insomnia. Find it hard to concentrate and remember routes. Need some serious help:(
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Masturbation is natural. However when it begins to take over your entire life and occupies all your time, or prevents you from creating/ maintaining meaningful relationships, it is a significant problem. Given your long standing history of complaints as well as the history of domestic abuse, it is advised that you consult a psychiatrist immediately. You also have a history of depression and suicidal tendency, which should not be ignored. Rather than speculating on what the problem or the cause is, seek professional help at the earliest. With medication and counseling, you will see relief in your symptoms and be able to improve the quality of life.
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Masturbation is a very healthy form of sexual outlet, do not feel guilty about it. Nearly 99% of men and more than 60% of women masturbate. It starts from adolescence and goes on in some people even till death. The pleasure (orgasm) from masturbation is said to be unique from sexual intercourse. In men, most of the liquid contains only water and some fructose and hormones. Hence it does not drain your energy. Many equate masturbation/ seminal fluid loss to lack of energy, impotency and so on. Many quacks, religious heads and pseudo healers also propagate the idea that masturbation is a disorder/ and wrongful behavior and instill fear on the mind of innocent men and women (we can see posters in train and bus stand, offering help for this behavior). Consult a psychiatrist, if you have excessive masturbation guilt or compulsive masturbation. Compulsive masturbation is when a person continues with frequent masturbation neglecting his/ her other work like education, job or social obligations. In fact masturbation.
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