I am in depression ryt now as I am unable to manage my emotions I am very emotional and sensitive person I got married to a person who never ever reciprocated my love care affection admiration devotion affection for him he never ever considered me his wife ryt now we are not living together but when I used to live together with him he has only expectations from me that I take care of him in every possible way washing his clothes making delicious food of his choice giving him foot massage head massage every day once he is back from his court more than ten times a day he used to ask me to make tea for him and I used to do so I sacrificed and compromised in every possible way to get reciprocation infact I even allowed him to mortgage all my jwelleries but he is being very inhuman heartless rude arrogant egoist with his words behaviour and actions he neither wants to live together with me nor want to divorce me I am shattered devastated and going through emotional breakdown I always feel like crying do not feel like waking up in the morning I have developed escapist attitude I always keep myself busy to avoid thinking about my marital life I am studying day and night to crack my competitive exam which is going to be held in january but when I go to bed I start over thinking thinking about how I am going to live my entire life without companionship I am craving for companionship but I am unable to move on and allow someone to come in my life even as a friend it's instilled in my heart mind and soul that I am married but I am taking anti anxiety pills to lighten and uplift my mood petril md and prothiaden for depression and lamitor od 100 for managing my behavioural issues like in the heat of the moment I speak the things which I can never ever mean by my heart I k very impulsive and short tempered I easily get attached to people like I am deeply attached with my husband that I am unable to get detached from him I have emotions and feelings for my husband but he doesn't have .i m trying to move on but it's difficult for me so I started working as a teacher in 2021 and ryt now I am preparing for competitive exam to have at least successful wonderful beautiful professional career so that I can led a blissful life I am craving for companionship so I cry every day for the life which in giving me so much pain miseries and sorrows please tell me the medicines which I am taking for depression and mood swings is appropriate how should I get rid of this pain as it's affecting my emotional and mental well being.
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lybrate-user I really want to first appreciate you for being such a strong woman and standing up for yourself in this abusive relationship. You are not giving yourself enough credit for your potential and integrity. To begin with i?d recommend you recover your jewelries and file for a contested divorce, even if it takes time. I completely understand the emotional turmoil you must be going through, and it is absolutely normal, it is not easy to move on from someone whom you have married, loved and sacrificed so much for. However, this fixation on him must die out eventually and this length of time of indulgence is just too much. You must first exorcise him out of your mind. You can either do that by talking him out of your emotions first to a counselor and then starting on a new relationship by completely walking away from the past. You also seem to have some sort of an attachment issue that could be stemming from your childhood you must express your bitterness and all the fond memories with the intention of purging him out the system. The professional will expertly guide you through the motion of exhaustively clearing away all memories along with the emotions so that you will be free of the ghosts of the past and are able to venture into new relationships. Once you have done that the memories will gradually fade away but the huge advantage you will have is that the emotions attached to those memories will be minus energy of the feelings and they will become impotent. In the meantime, I hope you have cleared your belongings and surroundings of all memories of this person; and also, that you do not haunt the places and situations you used to visit. If he has ditched you, you must learn to forgive him for your own sake and live a life free of him eventually in the mind and then in the heart. He is now history. Also I just hope all the medication you are currently taking is prescribed by a professional if not I highly recommend you seek a professional help immediately as these medicines have side effects and could tamper your emotional stability if not taken in moderation and under professional guidance. Meanwhile please find yourself a counselor whom you can confide in and who will systematically help you move on and achieve great progress in life. Wishing you all the very best for your bright future.
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