I am 21 years old I recently completed my degree I am in love since 5 years right now I completed my degree and I am at home since I am at home my parents are looking at me differently I tested my love and my mom saw the text and asked me not to repeat it once more there is lot of change in her behaviour should I say my love matter to my parents? My bf is an IT employee we both love each other but the problem is he belongs to poor family even thought he is employed and we belong to rich family both my parents are govt. 33 employees in high position please I am very sick regarding this issue when to say it to my mom I usually never hide any topic with my mom I am hiding this love matter since as soon as they come to know they ll arrange me matches which I can not take please suggest me what to do?

Dr. Saul PereiraPsychologist47yrs exp

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If you love someone you should be committed to make it work. You must tell your parents at sometime. So delaying it does not work at all. Haste makes waste to, so that be the dilemma. The best way to introduce the topic is to soften the blow by gentle hints and clues without revealing too much. For example, you could suggest a hypothetical poser as though you are talking about a friend in similar situation and study her reaction. Accordingly, you can pass your two-cents worth of an opinion. So in tiny bits if you talk in circles, you could prepare her for the final blow but with a lot of caution. If you win your mom's favour, you might win more than half the battle with your Dad. Now regarding the incompatibly in the socioeconomic area, it is likely going to be a problem: there will be vast cultural differences that will test your adjustability. It is not use thinking that you can before marriage: most men and women show their best side before marriage to safeguard the relationship, but after marriage things will change and people change too. That time you could be shocked and want out. So I would advise you seek premarital counseling where all the compatibility factors will be examined and you will be told what they will entail. If even after that you feel confident, you may even ask the counselor to be of assistance conveying the proposal to your parents.  

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