Hi Sir, 33 years old. I sleep but I keep getting dreams in my sleep, I had never sound sleep. Moreover, I am feeling inferior because my household people keep saying me that I do not know anything. Even in office they say I lack maturity. I feel that really I do not know anything in this world. Though I come for work, still I feel that am not good. I want to improve my carrier and come up financially but I do not know what I have do. I am not able to say anything straight forward because I feel that I should not hurt anybody. I feel that I do not have anybody even though I have everybody, sometimes I feel living in this world is totally waste. When nobody likes me, there is no point in living. I go mad sometimes. Nowadays I stopped talking much at home, as talking to everybody and getting a bad impression I have stopped talking both at home and in my office too. I do not know how to come out of this. I have many things to share but I have nobody to share. Please help me to come out of this.

Ms. Hemal Sanjay KuntePsychologist5yrs exp

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Dear Lybrate User, You are having lot many dreams because, you are unable to have deep sleep which is the result of your disturbed mind. I think all you need is someone who can tell you, how good and capable you are. May be you were never appreciated by your own people and because of this you are feelings worthless. You need love from others and also you need to learn to love yourself. Please take an appointment with a Counsellor, so that you will have someone to talk to. The Counsellor will listen to your feelings, without judging you and what ever you tell the Counsellor is kept confidential. Hence seek professional help. 

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Dr. Dolly AnadkatPsychologist10yrs exp

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Dear friend, I am sorry to hear your life story so far. It seems that you have started believing in everything people around you have been telling you. This has affected your self confidance and self esteem. I would suggest that you work with someone closely to change the way you are seeing yourself and situation. A counselor or psychologist will be able to help you learn the way you can responde differently in a given situation in a way that increase your confidance slowly and you once again will start believing in yourself. We all have immense potential within us and due to currently situation you are not able to tap into your own potentials and strength. Talking to someone will help you release your emotional stress. Once that happens you will be able to think and see your situation differently and responde differently. In the meanwhile, try following things for stress management. When our mind is hooked into past it is normal to have lot of negative thoughts and in turn feeling low. The good news is that our mind could be wired to switch back to positive things and resilience building. We have immense potential within us and we could tap into those one step at a time, one day at a time. When things does not happen as we wish or people do not behave as we expect that is when out of disappointment, frustration, loneliness, anger, sadness. Etc we react and our mind starts thinking negative thoughts. Changing this pattern of responding to stressful situation requires both persistence and patience. Also you will only be able to work on this out of love and kindness towards you. Strong motivation will go a long way. Writing a statement about how would you want to respond in a similar situation and how will your life and your happiness will change if you do learn to manage your stress and how to respond to it. Once that is clear. Try following things to learn relaxation response which leads to better coping mechanism on a daily basis. To begin with doing guided progressive muscular relaxation before sleeping will help you relax. You could google and download an audio file. I would also suggest you to take a multiple small break to take 3 nice and deep breath while keeping your eyes closed. You could do this while sitting or standing or while even walking or climbing stairs (keep your eyes open in that case). When you take a nice and deep break there is actual physiological change in your body. This will help you to activate parasympathetic nervous system which promotes relaxation and helps you calm down and think more clearly. This will also actually improve your performance in your work. Along with this exercise is one of the best way to relive stress and stay fit. Engage in any kind of physical activity at least 4 times a week. This also helps in stress reduction. Along with this some relaxation exercises as well as engaging in joyful activities such as music, singing, dancing, reading, being in nature, gardening, talking with friends or anything which you enjoy will help reducing stress and rejuvenation of your mind and body. Have good routine for sleep and eating. Lot of research has now proven that sugar is very harmful for our health. Reduce sugar and refined white floor in your diet as much as you could. Along with this also increase consumption of raw vegetables in the form of salad in both the meals of your day. Let me. Know if you need any further help. Hope this helps wishing you very best. 

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