I am of 47 years and my wife is 45 years. I am doing a semi govt job. And my wife works in private concern. We have a daughter studying in f. Y. B. Sc - biotech. My wife is not able to spare me ample time, to talk, - to walk about - so I remain disturb every now and then, what should I do?(" she does not listen to me

Dr. Saul PereiraPsychologist48yrs exp

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Just talk to her, whether she likes it or not. If she does not listen to you, why are you listening to her! I am not suggesting that you create a huge problem at home for the sake of getting her attention. It is a suggestion where, if you want something, you must assert yourself. What you are asking is very reasonable, so that she cannot make a big issue of it. I wonder if over the years, you have become so obedient to her that you now want to change it without expecting any resistance. That may not happen: in fact she may throw a tantrum to intimidate you and drag you back to the old system where she does what she wants and you do what she wants, anyway. Who will want to give that position of power away after enjoying it for so many years? it is the battle between husband and wife in the first two years of a marriage: to establish who wears the pants in the house i. E. Who is the real boss. To topple her from that position is extremely difficult especially after letting her reign for so many years. So if you want peace, let it be. If you want your way, anyway, you will have a losing battle on your hands, in my opinion. Let sleeping dogs lie. Find another way to spend time with her by sharing in shopping, household duties and modifications, playing some indoor games, and involving her in the gardening etc. 

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