I am 16 years old. My mind is not stable. I always want to spend time out of home with friends. I feel very alone and I think that nobody understand me. I want peace but I can't getting it. Tell me what should I do? Please help me.

Dr. Saul PereiraPsychologist47yrs exp

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Absolutely not at all unusual, for your age. Let me explain what you are going through. You have just entered adolescence: During this time there will be a spurt in the production of the male sex hormone, testosterone, which has a duration of two years. Due to this chemical alone there are three identified features that present itself over which you have no control: you will be sexually active, aggressive and rebellious, and you will have acne and pimple problems. Then if you have unresolved childhood issues, they will compound the situation and fuel your uncontrolled behavior. Please remember that you yourself may not be aware of all this. At this time you will imagine like you do now that your mind is not stable because this is an age of conflict, confusion and a lot of stress peculiar to your age. To expect peace during this time is a real difficult ask. I am also concerned about the feeling lonely: if that is serious you may need to meet with a counselor and check if you are gong through rejection from your family or you feel they don?t love you. In which case wanting to be out with your friends might be more welcoming than being at home. In that case it is more serious to meet with a counselor who must meet with your parents too. You must learn to listen to your parents and when they are right join them but otherwise discuss sensibly when there are differences. Because of all this be very careful that you do not do the rebellious things driven by the hormones. You can channelize your energy to get involved in sports and games regularly. Watch the influence of your peer group because their influence will be irresistible. You are establishing yourself among your peers, and you will try to be fashionable in every way possible. What is outrageous to others is very much in, with youngsters today. You will be seeking a lot of attention from your friends and some of them think that they have to be horrendously different for social acceptance and you will need to join them for their acceptance (and you have no acceptance at home anyway!). I recommend that you go for career counseling also and determine that your aptitude for academic pursuits are in line with your skills. 

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