I cry each day. Even my eyes got weak at such young age .my eyes give me so much pain .i do not speak that does not mean I am not in pain. Just and head pain a lot .lots of anger and cry .i feel to die but then feel whats point bear more see the end then do. I was child I got burned was said not to that not this ,can not ride bicycle but even though with all this I went out lied too cycle roam 2-3 street near my house. We were kicked out of my house. All said no one will talk to her (me) just becoz I did a simple mistake .i used to look up ask please talk to me forgive me. I was threatened beaten .all was fine becoz I had mom beside me. I was said abusing words by others .i told to my dear one .each day make fun of me. I am trying hard to get placed (yes I am believe me) I was topper of my batch .then my downfall start betrayal by friends ,end day torture by endless question (so I kept myself inside my room ).i need psychiatrist my mom says .yes I do need becoz I feel sometime to die. But I do not want to becoz I want to do my best then die .no one ever loved me .supported me or helped me when I do wrong decision then why now torture me you can not do this .i m trying please plz .yes you told I have bad health but not my fault my eyes were so good it got weak becoz of crying and allergy .i do not blame anyone .but doctor you know what I want peace .i love silence now then talking to anyone .i surrender becoz I can not say my pain to anyone even though I do to my parents they mock at me saying there se ho rahi sakta to kyu liya. Teh torture then whom I say friends no never I know all r same selfish mocking on someone weak .i never took wrong step never .no drug no smoking no alcohol ever ever .i was and I am ideal child .my eyes again crying so much .i know I will loose my eyes after few years at this rate of crying and pain swollen in my eyes .i encountered so many things in my life you will not can not even imagine my own dad did to us. My parents says me namakharam what I did please tell me I just want if you can not give me blessing then please do not say that at least (mei bhi dikhti hu kese milegi mujhe company mil I gayi to esi hi ghisi piti milegi. U know my moms words are always true always. I really want o go away from all far far I love my mom sis alot hell a lot they r then only I am alive else my dad my uncle my grandfather would have made me maid or thrown me in garbage. My health .past 3 years my health deteriorate at such a bad rate .and this pandemic year .i got mentally sick too .plz I know no one I gonna to listen me or help me but I feel good after bursting out. please keep it private please .plz do not call me please or message just put mail if you read this message .thanks for reading in advance.