I lost my mother all of a sudden last year and i m preparing for aipgmee at home.I suffer from loneliness and hopelessness,low self esteem.I seem to have developed a dependent personality,and i pick up quarrels with my long time friend and boyfriend(long distance now).I face difficulty with concentrating in my studies.Please help
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Please accept my condolences. Where is your father? It seems that your mother?s sudden demise has triggered loneliness and depression in you. In this circumstance, I would have assumed that your father may be there for you! Is he also affected badly that he cannot help you? Your insecurity vis-a-vis relationships may make you test your near and dear ones to the point of either pushing them away or making them push you away. You must immediately become aware of that and make a sincere effort to stop that and work towards preserving and nurturing relations you have. We are all social animals, gregarious by nature, and need each other to live life well. For healthy living we need to become interdependent. When we are young we are dependent, after that we become independent, but the ultimate social development is to be able to reach a state of interdependence. There may be other issues underlying your current situation. You will need to meet with a counselor, and if necessary a psychiatrist, to iron out the infringing and unresolved matters from your distant past or immediate past. For your studies, I suggest you attend tutorials where the collective seriousness may impact you positively. Even private tutorship may help. There are also some exercises I have that will help, but it involves other people too. Although you may not like what is going on, it is good that it has come up now, so that you can resolve them better, being younger. Do respect your long-distant relationship with your boyfriend and do not test him to the point of his wanting to quit the friendship. That will be a body-blow with more difficult consequences to follow. Also learn to love yourself well, and indulge in yourself without becoming narcissistic.
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