All you need to know about Premature Ejaculation

Many of the sexual issues are primarily not big problems. However, because of the taboo and inhibition around them, they are not discussed openly, hence they also fail to get resolved and become bigger. In fact most of the times there are no visible symptoms of any functional problems. Many of them are very basic issues and because of ignorance, myths, and social taboos lead to development of anxieties, distress and further worsening of the problem.

Often men are concerned about their performance in bed with their partner. They worry about- how best then can do, masturbation habits, size of penis and sperm quality. 

Consequences of Premature ejaculation (PE): 
Both you and your partner may end up experiencing highly unsatisfactory sex. In fact, it can significantly increase anxiety, which may deteriorate the problem. 

PE is one such sexual issue. It's not a disease; Not at all..!! 
If a person is sexually fit and experiences normal erections but just fail to hold the orgasm/ discharge for reasonable time then he is suffering from premature ejaculation. It's  a very normal problem, which if managed properly it can be easily resolved.

We will discuss this PE in 4 parts covering: what it is in actual, how does it happen, how to approach to resolve this problem with behavioural methods, exercise, techniques and medical remedies present in both modern and alternative medicine. 
Let s understand the problem in this 1st part!

What is Premature Ejaculation? 

Premature (early) ejaculation also referred to as rapid ejaculation; also called as early discharge. 
PE is the most common type of sexual dysfunction in men younger than 40 years and seen across all age groups. In elderly men (>60 years) erectile dysfunction is more common. A study conducted by the Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed that this condition is almost equally prevalent in sexually active men of all age groups. 
If a man experiences uncontrollable ejaculation (discharge of semen from your penis) either before or shortly after sexual penetration (usually within 1-2 minutes of penetration), he may be suffering from PE. The Mayo clinic at the United States defines PE as a condition in which  a man  always or nearly always ejaculates within one minute of penetration."

Instances of PE:
An occasional instance of premature ejaculation might not be cause of concern, but, if the problem occurs more than 50% of attempted sexual relations signifies existence of abnormal pattern for which treatment is required.

Premature ejaculation takes place with negligible sexual stimulation and even before the desire 
to ejaculate. Another way of describing PE by most therapist or clinicians is the occurrence of ejaculation sooner during sexual intercourse than he or his partner would like. 

This broad definition thus avoids specifying a precise  normal  duration for sexual activity and reaching a climax. The duration of sexual activity is highly variable and depends on various factors specific to each individual. Take a situation, a male may reach orgasm after 7 to 8 minutes of sexual intercourse, but if his partner is able to achieve climax mostly in 5 minutes and both are satisfied with this timing, then this is not defined as PE. 

Alternatively, a male might delay his ejaculation for up to 15- 20 minutes of sexual intercourse, but if his partner, even with foreplay, requires 25-30 minutes of total sexual activity before reaching climax, he may still consider his ejaculation premature because his partner has not been satisfied (at least, not through intercourse). But in routine practice this kind of situation is NOT called as PE. So every individual and every couple is unique. Same individual may have different sexual behaviour with different partners and different circumstances. Varied situations and varied places of performing the act have a vital role to play in determining the outcomes of individual sexual performance/s.



Knowing Premature Ejaculation - PART 1: Understanding What is PE

Did you know keeping your private parts clean can avoid major health issues?

Private parts not only make or break intimacy but also also affect your overall health. Men and women - both need to keep them clean. Here are 5 things that you need to religiously follow.

1) Wash them everyday - In case you are not washing your private parts every day, let me share with you that it is a must-do! Your private parts are moist and house many bacteria. You can use soap to wash but an unscented or mild one. Wash them with lukewarm and clean water.

2) Clean them up before and after sex - Cleaning your private parts before and after sex is of great importance. Before sex because of etiquette. And, after sex for a healthy sexual life ahead! The body fluids or semen which gather on and near your reproductive organs, if not washed can harbour the growth of bad bacteria and set a stage for infections.

3) Groom them well - Untrimmed hair around the private parts is highly unhygienic. It can lead to too much of itching, increasing the chances of infection.

4) Wear fresh undergarments everyday - Unwashed shirts can do but unwashed boxer or briefs is a big no-no. You need to keep your underwears clean &amp; dry. Wear a fresh and clean undergarment every day. Changing your briefs after masturbation, sex, work-outs in gym is also highly recommended.

5) Don't delay visit to a doctor - If you are experiencing any sort of irritation, itching, redness, odour, swelling or other form of discomfort please do not delay in consulting a doctor. It can be a sign of a serious health problem or a severe infection.

5 Sexual Hygiene Musts For Men And Women

Alchol can it affect your intimacy level with your partner, yes! But with this you might be wondering how can that be possible when you actually sustain yourself for long, maybe longer than you should be. It is probably the  whiskey penis . Alcohol may give you a sense of elation at one point of time, but it is essentially a nervous depressant. The over consumption of alcohol mainly has a reduced effect on sensitivity for both men and women.

How alcohol affects sex life in men: The effect of alcohol on the sex life of men is immense. In most cases, chronic and acute cases of alcohol consumption have shown to reduce the production of testosterone in men. Since testosterone is the hormone that results in the increase in libido in men, the effects of alcohol really reduce the performance in men. It has shown to reduce pleasurability and it can also reduce the intensity of orgasms. Sometimes, it can cause difficulty in ejaculation or delayed ejaculation.

How alcohol affects sex life in women: Alcohol can have a very mixed effect on women in general. While it can increase sexual arousal and desire, it can also result in low sensitivity. Women have a higher percentage of fat as compared to water in their bodies, this means that alcohol has a more profound effect on their bodies as compared to that in men. Their bodies also take longer to process and eliminate the alcohol. While some women report a heightened sense of sexual arousal and an increase in the duration of the orgasm, a large number of women also complain of lesser lubrication.

Alcohol also has a psychological effect; that is the loss of inhibition that may help in developing carnal instincts when intoxicated. This psychological effect may have a more profound effect than the physiological effects as a result of which women might claim that alcohol does indeed help in better sex.

Alcohol - How it Affects Your Sex Life?

5 reasons your partner doesn't want to have sex anymore

There are innumerable explanations as to why couples in long-term relationships find themselves in situations when either one of the partner's starts avoiding sex for a reason the other cannot comprehend.

The explanation for your partner's behaviour may be due to an underlying medical issue or various emotional or psychological factors. Following are a few reasons why your partner does not want to have sex anymore:

1. Physical factors: your partner might be experiencing a loss of libido due to physical ailments, particularly ones pertaining to the endocrine and circulatory systems. Disorders such as diabetes, hypothyroidism, heart complications to name a few, affect the hormone levels in the body, which leads to the lack of sexual drive.

2. Psychological factors: Many mental and emotional factors also affect libido in both men and women. Stress and depression, which often cause sleep deprivation, are two of the biggest causes of unwillingness to have sex. Talk to your partner about what the root of the problem is and ascertain what is creating stress and triggering depression. Communication and counselling are the main ways of dealing with such a situation.

3. Excessive masturbation: If a person watches too much pornography and consequently indulges in masturbation frequently, sexual function is automatically lowered when it comes to performing during intercourse. If your partner masturbates too much, simply ask that the practice needs to be put an end to.

4. Lack of affection: When there is a lack of warmth and affection between partners, the desire to engage in sexual intercourse is automatically diminished. Communicate with your companion to determine ways in which you can rekindle love and passion in the relationship.

5. Addiction to narcotics: If your partner has developed an addiction to certain narcotics, such as nicotine, morphine and various anti-depressants that reduce sex drive, it could be the reason for not wanting to have sex.

The reasons for developing an aversion to sex are often extremely subjective and complex. Open and honest communications between partners may unravel the problem but in many cases, therapy and medical assistance provides the solution.



5 Reasons Your Partner Doesn't Want to Have Sex Anymore

Many people suffer from a low libido problem. This can be a problem for their partners as well as for themselves. A low sex drive can also reduce one's self esteem and confidence. In severe cases it also leads to depression.

Factors which cause low sex drive:
1. Sexual problems: Many sexual problems also lead to a low sex drive. An inability to experience orgasm even after a lot of attempts can make one indifferent to sex. Some people also experience pain because of a tight vagina. In such cases their desire to have sex reduces greatly.

2. Medical diseases: Many medical conditions also affects your libido, such as cancer, arthritis, blood sugar (diabetes), artery diseases, high blood pressure and neurological diseases.

3. Medications: Some people suffer from depression and anxiety disorders. To get over these disorders most doctors prescribe them antidepressants and anti-anxiety pills, these medications create a very low libido.

4. Habits: Many lifestyle habits such as over-consumption of alcohol can make your sex drive reduce a lot. Smoking also decreases the blood flow in your body which may make your libido fall.

5. Surgery: Reconstructive surgeries such as breast reconstruction surgery and genital tract surgery can also affect sexual desire and give your body signals to not engage in an intercourse.

6. Fatigue: Tiredness because of physical activities or caring for your old parents or young children can also make you uninterested in sex. Your body and brain might not have the energy to engage in an intercourse due to fatigue.

7. Menopause: The levels of estrogen reduce greatly during menopause. Low estrogen levels make your vagina dry hence sex can be uncomfortable and painful. Women also go through hormonal changes which make them suffer from a low libido.

8. Pregnancy: After pregnancy, breastfeeding your baby becomes an everyday activity. This can reduce sexual desire because of the pressure of caring for a new born baby.

Regular exercising complemented with enough sleep is known to reduce stress thus giving you a high sex drive. Avoid consuming alcohol. Testosterone replacement therapy (a therapy used for treating erectile dysfunction) also treats low desire.

Worrying Factors That Lead to a Low Sex Drive

Knowing premature ejaculation - part 3: management and techniques (non-medical methods)

As shared in part 1and 2 of this series, because of premature ejaculation (pe), both the partners may end up experiencing highly unsatisfactory sex. In fact, it can increase anxiety, which may deteriorate the problem. 
Remember there is not a single magical drug or medicine in the chemist shop which can solve your problem overnight especially if you have chronic pe. Before seeking any medical treatment for pe, it is appropriate to consider the varied options for solving this issue. These include counseling with a sexual therapist, non- medical treatments like various exercises/ techniques and medical treatments including both modern and alternative medicine.

A. Counseling from an expert - sexual therapist or sexual medicine practitioner:
It is well understood that sex is in the mind. However, repeated pe/ failures can lead to lot of stress and disappointments. Anxiety due to pe itself is a big issue and can lead to recurrence of pe.
Reassurance from sexual therapist / counselor that pe is not a disease and can be easily treatable is relaxing for men who are facing this problem. So please share your detailed history and sexual habits with the expert. This may help the expert to guide you well.

B. Behavioral changes:

Some basic things may also help you to deal with the problem. 

1. Some men attempt to treat themselves for premature ejaculation by distracting themselves by thinking nonsexual thoughts (such as naming cricket players and records) to avoid getting excited too fast when approaching their partners. This helps them to focus their attention away from the sexual stimulation.

2. It is also suggested to men that they should relieve themselves of the sexual tension by ejaculating with self masturbation 1-2 hours before attempting sexual intercourse with their partner.

3. Using condoms is known to help in premature ejaculation in some men by decreasing sensation.

4. Women on top position usually helps to delay orgasm in men

 
C. Exercises &amp; techniques:

There are several exercise and techniques you can try sitting in your home.

1. The" stop and start" method:
This technique involves sexually stimulating the man by self until he feels like he is about to reach orgasm. Then he needs to stop the stimulation for about 20-30 seconds and then start it again. Repeat this pattern until the man wants to ejaculate. This can be continued for 10-15 minutes. At the end of say, 10th or 15th minute, continue stimulation until the man reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
2. The" squeeze" method:
 This technique involves sexually stimulating the man by self or by his partner until he recognizes that he is about to ejaculate. At that point, the man or his partner gently squeezes the end of the penis (where the glans penis meets the shaft) for at least 15 seconds. Stop sexual stimulation for about 60 seconds, and then start it again. The person or couple may repeat this pattern for at least 10-15 minutes. At the end of say, 10th or 15th minute, continue stimulation until the man reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
3. Practice breathing exercises 

Deep breathing can greatly help in controlling the arousal and tension that cause early ejaculation. Men must avoid shallow breathing as it can trigger premature ejaculation. Instead, what you should do is spend 5 seconds taking in a long deep breath; then hold it for 3 seconds and then exhale for the next 5 seconds. If you can do this for 5 minutes in the bedroom without pause then you can control premature ejaculation.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on'consult.

Knowing Premature Ejaculation - PART 3: Management and Techniques (Non-medical methods)

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