Becoming a parent is one of the greatest joys in life. It is a magical feeling to hold your child in your arms for the first time. However, as your child grows up, you will notice certain behavioural changes that can be difficult to control or withstand. Temper tantrums are common in children. A child uses tantrums to vent frustration and anger, which he/she feels toward a person or a situation.

While such temper tantrums may lead you to lose your temper, remember that children do not have the same emotional maturity as that of an adult. Therefore, rather than being strict to your child, here are some ways to deal with temper tantrums.

1. Don t try to calm your child: Temper tantrums are often attention seeking in nature. Therefore, you will make it worse if you try too hard to calm your child while he/she is throwing such a tantrum. Instead, choose to ignore the behaviour and go about doing your job. However, keep an eye out to check that your child does not do anything to harm himself/herself or others during this time. You should also verbally clarify that such behaviour is not acceptable.

2. Speak softly but with resolve: Many parents seem to think that shouting at their kids helps against temper tantrums. It does not. In fact, the more your child shouts, the more softly you should interact with them. When you shout you give your child the opportunity to shout - they do this so that they can be heard. Instead, be stern. Sometimes offering a choice can help your child feel as if he/she is in control of the situation.

3. Empathize with your child: Seeing the world from your toddler s perspective is no easy task. This is why parents often think that a temper tantrum is meaningless. However, in most cases, a child s temper tantrum is rooted in the inability to perform a task or articulate his/her wishes. As a parent, you need to devise alternate forms of communication with your child, so that he/she can express feelings better.

4. Give them some space: Rather than scolding your child for throwing a tantrum, let him/her express their frustration. This is similar to the concept of adults venting undesirable feelings. However, tell your kids to express frustration in a non-destructive way. This approach helps your child become emotionally stronger, as they learn to deal with sadness and anger in their own way, without requiring support from elders.

You need to understand that all children throw temper tantrums at one time or another. How you handle the situation determines how your child will deal with frustration and sorrow in later parts of their life.

Parenting Tips To Tackle Temper Tantrums In Children!

What happens when you are addicted to a chemical substance? You lose control of your life. It doesn t matter what you are addicted to alcohol, nicotine or drugs the effects are the same. It is usually not easy to get rid of an alcohol and/or nicotine addiction. Most people find it difficult to give up these substances even after years in de-addiction therapy. Hence, it s prudent to let Ayurveda, the ancient science of healing handhold us in getting rid of addictions. 

Cigarette smoke contains over 4,000 chemicals, including 43 known cancer-causing (carcinogenic) compounds and 400 other toxins. These cigarette ingredients include nicotine, tar, and carbon monoxide, as well as formaldehyde, ammonia, hydrogen cyanide, arsenic, and DDT. Perhaps this list of ingredients that are found in cigarettes is enough to make you want to quit smoking for good! - Lowell Kleinman, M.D., and Deborah Messina-Kleinman, M.P.H 

Addiction - The Ayurvedic View
Ayurveda considers alcohol and nicotine consumed in large quantities as  Visha  or toxic. According to Ayurveda, alcohol has the following properties-

Light or Laghu
Hot or Ushna
Sharp or Tikshna
Drying or Visada
Rough or Ruksha
Expensive or Vikaasa
Swift or Aasuga
Sour or Amla
Subtle or Sookshma
These properties are all opposite to the qualities that ojas possesses. Ojas has all life-giving properties and alcohol and nicotine have life-negating qualities.

Why do humans get addicted to alcohol and nicotine?
Human brain produces Dopamine normally and what alcohol does is to activate the nervous system to promote dopamine formation. The brain thus remembers the taste of alcohol and nicotine by creating special cells called receptor cells. As a person increases the quantity of alcohol, these cells also increase in numbers. When the person wants to give up his addictions these receptor cells agitate and create withdrawal symptoms with unpleasant and even dangerous symptoms.

De-addiction - Ayurveda Way
De-addiction treatments in Ayurveda comprise the following:

Purification therapies or Panchkarma: These are used for getting rid of all toxins present in the patient s body. These must always be done under the supervision of an ayurvedacharya as they are quite potent. After Panchakarma, the patient is given vomiting therapy or Vamana, followed by purgative therapy or Virechana, Basti or enema therapy and administration of Nasya or nasal drops therapy. All these help in detoxifying the body and mind and prepare the patient for further de-addiction ayurvedic treatments like Rasayana therapies which nourish and strengthen the body after Panchkarma. For treatment of addictions, Rasayana treatments include changes in diet and use of oral herbal medicines both.
Herbal medicines used in de-addiction: A range of herbal medicines and their combinations are used in the treatment of addictive problems in Ayurveda and these are to be consumed orally. Ayurveda prescribes Chamomile and Ashwagandha in combination to heal the lungs. These help in cleansing lungs of smoke- related problems. Doctors also prescribe congestion relieving herbs like ginger and pepper mixed with honey or lemon. 
In addition, herbs to improve memory, concentration and to fight depression are also given. These are:

Shankhpushpi
Kanphool or dandelion
Brahmi
Ashwagandha
In addition, herbs to treat sleep disturbances like Jatamansi, Sarpgandha, Brahmi and Jaiphal are also prescribed. Since most addicts have impaired liver function, herbs that improve liver function like Aloe Vera, Punarnava, Long pepper, Kutki, Tulsi are given to revive the liver.

Ayurvedic View on Alcohol and Nicotine De-addiction

Marriages very well might be bonds made in heaven, but for all practical reasons, they remain enacted on earth. When two different people meet, it s the union of two different mind-cultures too. It contains two diverse goals, two different habits of living, dissimilar aspirations & overall different priorities, that needs to be fused to restart a new common journey.

"To know themselves in order to discover the other  is the key here. Most relationships will get strained at some time, resulting in a failure to function optimally and produce self-reinforcing, maladaptive patterns. These patterns may be called "negative interaction cycles".

There are many possible reasons for this, including insecure attachment, ego, arrogance, jealousy, anger, greed, poor communication/understanding or problem-solving, ill health, third parties and so on. Changes in situations like financial state, physical health, and the influence of other family members can have a profound influence on the conduct, responses, and actions of the individuals in a relationship. Marriages require the maximum efforts from both the individuals.

Given the growing concept of individualism and personal independence, people fail to put in or sometimes understand the requirement of working towards their marriage, leaving them searching for an escape route as soon as the going gets tough. Marital issues may lead to major individual psychological problems with each partner trying to hurt the other emotionally as the relationship gets bitter.

Consequently, divorce rates in this country have shown a considerable increase in the past decade. This article should help you figure out some of the ways to save and improve the bond that is marriage while keeping the importance of individualism and personal space in mind-

Teamwork: It is essential for both the individuals to work towards their marriage and show equal commitment. With only one person trying to build a better relationship while the other one shows minimal effort and goes astray reduces the sense of belongingness; eventually leading to estrangement.

Take Responsibility: Apologize when it s your mistake and take responsibility for your actions, instead of going around in a continuous loop of the blame game.

Keep the Spark Alive: Take out time for each other whenever possible. A simple date night once in a while or a weekend getaway with undivided attention to the partner helps to keep the romance alive in long term relationships which more often than not fades away with time, without effort from the partners.

Appreciate: Appreciating the partner s efforts are probably the most important factor in any marriage. It avoids the individual feeling as though he/she has been taken for granted; which is the root cause of most marital problems.

Therapy: Marital therapy is usually beneficial when people are unable to deal with their differences within the marriage. Through marital counselling, you can make thoughtful decisions about rebuilding and strengthening your relationship or going your separate ways. The therapist can help with many specific issues, including communication problems, sexual difficulties, conflicts about child rearing, intrusion from extended family, substance abuse, anger, and infidelity.

Marriage counselling might also be helpful in cases of domestic abuse. In a collectivist society like ours, family therapy is usually used because the families of both partners play a major role in their lives. Family therapy is a type of psychological counselling (psychotherapy) that can help family members improve communication and resolve conflicts.

Marriage - How To Strengthen It?

Sometimes you may find yourself stuck in a rut that is frustrating and mind numbing. If you re in such a situation, it could be an indication that you need to reprogram your mind. This will help you set realistic goals for yourself and lead a more fulfilling life. Before getting to how to reprogram your mind, it is important to first understand how the mind works.

Mind vs Brain

In colloquial terms, the words mind and brain may be used interchangeably but, the two are in fact not the same. While the brain is a physical organ, the mind can be described as a virtual entity present within each cell of our body and extended to minimum 2 inches outside body. That is why mind controls body. It is more like a collection of thoughts, emotions, imagination and memories. When compared to a computer, the brain acts as the hardware while the mind is the software within it.

The Three States of Mind 
The mind can be categorized into three states: 

Conscious
Subconscious 
Unconscious
Actions that need you to make an effort and think about what you are doing are said to be performed by the conscious mind. The subconscious mind refers to information that is accessible to you when needed and otherwise not something you pay attention to. For example, when walking down the road to your house, your mind subconsciously creates landmarks. The unconscious mind consists largely of primitive instincts and memories from early childhood that may not be easily recalled.

Unconscious mind also contains memories from past lives. That has been proved by father of modern hypnotherapy, Dr. Brian Weiss. Thus hypnotherapy under supervision is a great tool for reprogramming your mind. Embedding positive cognitive scripts / suggestions through hypnosis helps in reprogramming mind. 

A majority of our daily functions are controlled by the unconscious mind. The memories stored in our unconscious mind are responsible for many decisions that we make based on beliefs. Thus, training the unconscious can help reprogram the mind and make it more productive.

Here are three easy tips to help you make your unconscious more efficient.

Meditation: Meditation not only calms the mind and reduces stress, but can also help train the unconscious mind. Meditation helps increase your ability to concentrate on an activity and achieve the desired level of mental focus. This, in turn, helps develop new ideas and increases your belief in yourself.
Visualize what you want to achieve: Merely telling yourself that you want to do better is not enough. You need to set a goal for yourself and visualize it to begin working towards it. Create a visual board of the type of house you would like to live in, the lifestyle you would like to have, the job you would like to have etc. avoid generalized visions and be specific about what you want.
Hypnotherapy: Hypnotherapy is a safe, brief and effective way to deal with many emotional and anxiety-related issues, such as those listed on the right. It enables you to deal with your own mental challenges and blocks, so that you can build on your strengths and take control of your life. 

Reprogramming the Mind - How it Helps You?

Being affected with bipolar disorder can not only strain any relationship but also disrupt different aspects of family life. The mood swings stemming from bipolar disorder tend to occur spontaneously without any particular reason. The effects too can be detrimental. Below are some of the best ways one can cope with the impact of a bipolar disorder:

Looking for patterns and signs: You should keep a watch for signs that indicate that you may be entering an episode of mania or depression. Along with a shift in the mood, one should look out for any changes in sleep patterns. It is also essential to keep a track of alcohol or drug usage, energy levels, level of concentration and self-confidence. Since stress is considered a major trigger of bipolar disorder, you should try to simplify life by staying away from any triggers of stress. You may also ask your family and friends to share responsibilities in case your job is too stressful.
Keeping an organized and regular schedule: Sticking to a regular and organized routine can help in controlling mood swings and symptoms of bipolar disorder. People with bipolar disorders generally don t deal well with a lot of changes. Regardless of whether one does errands or work irregularly, it is important to sleep and wake up at a particular time. Also, practising healthy sleeping habits and relax before bed by listening to music, reading books and taking a warm bath is recommended. Make sure that you don t watch thrilling television shows, surf the internet, or play video games since these habits can worsen the mood swings.
Getting regular exercise: Studies show that regular physical exercise can go a long way in improving your mood. You can start by taking a slow walk around your neighbourhood and can gradually increase the intensity of your workouts.
Avoiding alcohol and other drugs: Not just alcohol, caffeine is also a strong stimulant which can make you stay wide awake at night and trigger manic episodes. It is also advised to cut back on soda and other sugary drinks, particularly at night. Alcohol, as well as other drugs, can also affect the impact of the medication which, in turn, can trigger mood swings.
Writing down your feelings: Keeping a journal of the day to day life, stressors and other problems that you may have encountered through the day can be of help. With the passage of time, you will be able to identify the patterns that emerge as triggers which in turn can help you prepare yourself and manage the mood swings better.
These small lifestyle changes and coping strategies can aid in dealing with bipolar disorder effectually. Visiting a specialist can help you get an insight into the exact condition and assist in the management of the triggers.

5 Tips On How To Cope With Bipolar Disorder!

Every packet of cigarette comes with the warning 'Smoking is injurious to health'. With every national budget plan, the prices of nicotine based additives are hiked. Yet, you cannot quit smoking because you find it extremely difficult to resist the nicotine urge. Ayurveda says that the root cause of addiction is mental stress due to one of the 3 Doshas that are Vata, Pitta, Kapha. People try to terminate them through temporary, addictive methods rather than a bit more natural, holistic methods. Here's how it can be easier for you to quit smoking by adopting Ayurvedic remedies.

Ayurvedic remedies:
1. Drink adequate amount of water, especially from a copper vessel. This helps to accumulate the wastes and release them.
2. Perform the Neti Kriya (inhaling saline water through one nostril and releasing it through the other and then reversing the procedure).
3. Performing the Bhastrika Pranayama twice every day, both in the morning and at night.
4. Consume 3 tablets or 1  teaspoon of triphala everyday before going to bed, to eliminate the deposited nicotine tar in your system.
5. Consumption of a measured mixture of ashwagandha, bala, shatavari and ginseng every day, or a chyawanprash containing these help in detoxification.

Changes in diet:
1. Avoid consumption of alcohol and other addictive drugs, such as coffee, sugar, etc. because they increase the urge to smoke.
2. Decrease intake of fatty foods because your metabolism rate is lower than at most other times, so you might risk gaining weight during this period.
3. Try a vegetarian diet because it increases the Sattvik quality of your mind. Every fresh food item contains prana or life which rejuvenates both your body and mind.
4. Chew anti-nicotine gums or suck on cinnamon sticks which curb your urge to smoke.
5. Keep eating low-calorie food items like carrots, apples or celery.
6. Incorporating regular exercise in your routine may help you to quit smoking more easily. It controls weight gain, which is a side-effect of quitting, and also offers you a fit and healthy lifestyle.
7. Meditating and doing yoga regularly helps in relaxing your mind. Yogic postures like Sabasan help attain internal peace and divert your mind from craving to smoke.

Besides these techniques, there are various other ways like taking help from a professional ayurvedic counselor, which will help you quit smoking, socializing with friends or spending quality time with your family, will keep your mind diverted from the stress of quitting.

Ayurveda and Smoking - Ayurvedic Medicines to Quit Smoking

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