5 reasons your partner doesn't want to have sex anymore

There are innumerable explanations as to why couples in long-term relationships find themselves in situations when either one of the partner's starts avoiding sex for a reason the other cannot comprehend.

The explanation for your partner's behaviour may be due to an underlying medical issue or various emotional or psychological factors. Following are a few reasons why your partner does not want to have sex anymore:

1. Physical factors: your partner might be experiencing a loss of libido due to physical ailments, particularly ones pertaining to the endocrine and circulatory systems. Disorders such as diabetes, hypothyroidism, heart complications to name a few, affect the hormone levels in the body, which leads to the lack of sexual drive.

2. Psychological factors: Many mental and emotional factors also affect libido in both men and women. Stress and depression, which often cause sleep deprivation, are two of the biggest causes of unwillingness to have sex. Talk to your partner about what the root of the problem is and ascertain what is creating stress and triggering depression. Communication and counselling are the main ways of dealing with such a situation.

3. Excessive masturbation: If a person watches too much pornography and consequently indulges in masturbation frequently, sexual function is automatically lowered when it comes to performing during intercourse. If your partner masturbates too much, simply ask that the practice needs to be put an end to.

4. Lack of affection: When there is a lack of warmth and affection between partners, the desire to engage in sexual intercourse is automatically diminished. Communicate with your companion to determine ways in which you can rekindle love and passion in the relationship.

5. Addiction to narcotics: If your partner has developed an addiction to certain narcotics, such as nicotine, morphine and various anti-depressants that reduce sex drive, it could be the reason for not wanting to have sex.

The reasons for developing an aversion to sex are often extremely subjective and complex. Open and honest communications between partners may unravel the problem but in many cases, therapy and medical assistance provides the solution.



5 Reasons Your Partner Doesn't Want to Have Sex Anymore

When a person is aroused there are a host of hormonal changes within the person's body. These changes do manifest on the surface in the form of certain physical variations. Sexual stimulation happens to alter the state of human genitalia and that too in obvious ways. The blood flow to the concerned area increases, there is enough of natural lubrication in and around the organ and for women, the vagina loosens up and the clitoris swells. Intercourse followed by a climactic release will make the clitoris regain its original size. However, worries crop up when that is not the case with every single female. This serious medical condition of a swollen clitoris should never be overlooked; it must be treated by seeking experienced medical assistance.	 

1. Trauma: Any slight scratch or one wrong touch can cause a swollen clitoris. Even a scratch of your fingernail while you are masturbating or a rough sexual intercourse can and is enough to create trauma in your clitoris.

2. Hair: Hair grows normally around your genital area. It is very common for a woman to have pubic hair. But sometimes small hair splinters lead to trouble and hair gets stuck into your clitoris and causes swelling. This is a very annoying process, sometimes you may have to use a magnifying glass to remove the hair from your clitoris.

3. Clothing: sometimes your tight clothes can result in a swollen clitoris. The friction from your rough clothing material can cause your clitoris to swell. Sometimes you may be using a detergent that is not suitable for you or you may be wearing a dress material, which you're allergic to. You should always wash your clothes in plain water and dry it before using.

4. Infection: you may also have some bacterial and fungal infection in your clitoris, which can cause a swollen clitoris. This infection can also invite itchiness and redness and these can make it even worse. If it doesn't subside within some days then you should definitely see a doctor.

5. Cysts: small cysts known as Bartholomew's cysts can grow on the clitoris. This thing hampers the natural lubrication of the body.  If you are having clitoris swelling because of cysts then you should seek medical attention immediately.

Your clitoris is naturally sensitive and if you are having a swollen clitoris after intercourse then you should pull back from sexual intercourse for a few days. At times the swelling goes away on its own.

Swollen Clitoris - 5 Main Reason Behind Enlarged Clitoral  

Knowing premature ejaculation - part 3: management and techniques (non-medical methods)

As shared in part 1and 2 of this series, because of premature ejaculation (pe), both the partners may end up experiencing highly unsatisfactory sex. In fact, it can increase anxiety, which may deteriorate the problem. 
Remember there is not a single magical drug or medicine in the chemist shop which can solve your problem overnight especially if you have chronic pe. Before seeking any medical treatment for pe, it is appropriate to consider the varied options for solving this issue. These include counseling with a sexual therapist, non- medical treatments like various exercises/ techniques and medical treatments including both modern and alternative medicine.

A. Counseling from an expert - sexual therapist or sexual medicine practitioner:
It is well understood that sex is in the mind. However, repeated pe/ failures can lead to lot of stress and disappointments. Anxiety due to pe itself is a big issue and can lead to recurrence of pe.
Reassurance from sexual therapist / counselor that pe is not a disease and can be easily treatable is relaxing for men who are facing this problem. So please share your detailed history and sexual habits with the expert. This may help the expert to guide you well.

B. Behavioral changes:

Some basic things may also help you to deal with the problem. 

1. Some men attempt to treat themselves for premature ejaculation by distracting themselves by thinking nonsexual thoughts (such as naming cricket players and records) to avoid getting excited too fast when approaching their partners. This helps them to focus their attention away from the sexual stimulation.

2. It is also suggested to men that they should relieve themselves of the sexual tension by ejaculating with self masturbation 1-2 hours before attempting sexual intercourse with their partner.

3. Using condoms is known to help in premature ejaculation in some men by decreasing sensation.

4. Women on top position usually helps to delay orgasm in men

 
C. Exercises &amp; techniques:

There are several exercise and techniques you can try sitting in your home.

1. The" stop and start" method:
This technique involves sexually stimulating the man by self until he feels like he is about to reach orgasm. Then he needs to stop the stimulation for about 20-30 seconds and then start it again. Repeat this pattern until the man wants to ejaculate. This can be continued for 10-15 minutes. At the end of say, 10th or 15th minute, continue stimulation until the man reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
2. The" squeeze" method:
 This technique involves sexually stimulating the man by self or by his partner until he recognizes that he is about to ejaculate. At that point, the man or his partner gently squeezes the end of the penis (where the glans penis meets the shaft) for at least 15 seconds. Stop sexual stimulation for about 60 seconds, and then start it again. The person or couple may repeat this pattern for at least 10-15 minutes. At the end of say, 10th or 15th minute, continue stimulation until the man reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
3. Practice breathing exercises 

Deep breathing can greatly help in controlling the arousal and tension that cause early ejaculation. Men must avoid shallow breathing as it can trigger premature ejaculation. Instead, what you should do is spend 5 seconds taking in a long deep breath; then hold it for 3 seconds and then exhale for the next 5 seconds. If you can do this for 5 minutes in the bedroom without pause then you can control premature ejaculation.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on'consult.

Knowing Premature Ejaculation - PART 3: Management and Techniques (Non-medical methods)

What is Monogamous Relationship?

You (who have been tested for STD/STIs and don't have any) are having sex with only one partner (who also has been tested for STD/STIs and doesn't have any) who only has sex with you. And you both keep it that way! 

Stated another way, you are both STD/STI free and only have sex with each other. People of any sexual orientation can engage in monogamous relationships. The only thing implied by the term monogamy is that the relationship consists of two people who are romantically and/or sexually exclusive. Theoretically, outside of abstinence, this is really the safest type of "safer sex" that you can have. 

Celebrated on 1st December of each year, World AIDS Day, aims to spread awareness about HIV / AIDs. It is an STD wherein, HIV stands for human immunodeficiency infection and AIDS stands for acquired immune deficiency syndrome. The disease hinders the immune system in keeping up our body s security against sickness. HIV causes individuals to end up wiped out with infections that regularly would not affect them and HIV leads to AIDS.

Understanding the Symptoms:

HIV has few or no signs or symptoms for up to ten years or more before side effects of AIDS tends to manifest. There is no cure for HIV/AIDS, yet treatment is accessible. A few people have HIV symptoms not long after being infected. These include:

There are a few phases of HIV illness. The primary HIV side effects may include swollen glands in the throat, armpit, or crotch.
Other early HIV symptoms incorporate slight fever, headaches, exhaustion, and muscle throbs.
These symptoms may keep on going for just a couple of weeks. At that point, there are typically no HIV indications for a long time. That is the reason it can be difficult to know whether or not a person is suffering from HIV.
The symptoms of AIDS show up in the most advanced phase of the HIV disease. These are as follows:

Along with a severely damaged immune system, a person with AIDS may likewise have thrush. A thrush is a thick, whitish covering on the tongue that is brought about by a yeast infection and now and then joined by a sore throat.
Serious or repetitive vaginal yeast infection.
Pelvic inflammatory illness.
Serious and frequent infections.
Unexplained fatigue that might be followed by headaches, dizziness.
Loss of more than ten pounds of weight that is not because of physical exercise or consuming fewer calories.
Risk Factors: There are a lot of ways in which you can get the infection. HIV is transmitted through blood, semen, vaginal fluids and breast milk. The most well-known ways in which HIV is spread, are:

Having sexual intercourse without a condom with somebody who has HIV/AIDS.
Using needles or syringes that have been used by someone who has HIV/AIDS.
Being punctured with a needle or surgical instrument that has been contaminated with HIV.
Getting HIV blood, semen or vaginal discharge into open injuries or wounds.
Babies born to women with HIV/AIDS can get HIV from their mothers during birth or from breastfeeding.
There are numerous ways in which you can protect yourself from HIV. These are as follows:

The most secure way is to limit the number of sexual partners you take on.
Try to have safer sex and always use protection.
Get your partners tested for HIV.
HIV tests are a typical piece of social insurance.
In case that you think you may have been infected by HIV, talk to a specialist or a doctor about testing. Discussing what risks you might have taken can help you choose whether testing is ideal for you.

This World AIDS Day - Let's Spread the Awareness About HIV/AIDS

8 Steps to a Happier Sex Life - Sex is probably the most important part of a relationship along with compatibility, trust and comfort. To make your relationship stronger and deeper, happiness in sex life is crucial. It must be the part of your life that you always look forward to and that brings the two of you together irrespective of the way your days go.

Follow these simple protocol to make for a happy sex life and therefore a happy life.

1) Believe you are sexy - Stop undermining yourself. You are sexy, accept it. And believe that your partner gets turned on by you. When you believe that your partner finds you sexy, you will be more interested in sex and so will your partner be.

2) Believe in the little gestures - Sex is not always awesome while you are in the act. The build up through the day can be made with the simplest of actions. A meaningful touch on the breakfast table, a mid-day text saying you miss him and an intimate evening message, or simply holding hands while shopping for grocery, all add up to build the connection between both of you.

3) Focus on the positive - Tell your partner what he does that you like. The kiss on the nape or how their breathe on your skin makes your senses tingle ? tell that. When your partner knows what you like, your bedroom experiments can take interesting turns. Always help your partner focus gently to what gives you pleasure.

4) Make time for sex - When new in a relationship, couples tend to have more sex and the frequency diminishes once they are comfortable in the situation. Avoid this; sex should be in your priority list at all times. Sex indeed should be a natural event. However, our lifestyles don't permit it. Also, there are too many distractions. If you need to schedule sex, it's okay. The idea is to indulge in it. You both have your needs and they should be fulfilled, right?

5) Fantasize - One great way to keep the passion alive is to share your fantasies. Doesn't matter how dirty it is, don't worry about what your partner will think. Far from judging, you yourself might realize something new about your partner. Chances are, that you might love the fantasies you both talk about.

6) Take it easy -  In real life, it is okay to not be perfect, to stop to catch breath and be real. To be happy with your sex life doesn't mean having spectacular sex every time. More than how you perform, it is how the experience was for both of you. Enjoy the process, it is for real.

7) Be responsive - Respond, even if you are not in the mood. Don't shun your partner because you are not in the mood. But if one of you wants to have sex, pushing them away is not a good idea. And if you still don't want to go ahead, explain that it's not them, but the time and plan to connect some time in near future.

8) Be willing to have sex - If you would rather watch tv all day rather than have sex and then do it nevertheless just because your partner initiated it, they would know. Never make your partner feel that you are having sex out of obligation. This is a mood killer and a guarantee for low satisfaction derived. Make sex an enjoyable affair, think what all you like and show them to your partner. 

If you have any further questions on sexual health, ask me by clicking on 'Consult'.

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Having Better Sex - 8 Steps to a Happier Sex Life

When Should You Use Viagra?

Viagra is a very common drug prescribed for treating erectile dysfunction. It works by enhancing the flow of blood to the penis during sexual intercourse to bring about erection. Viagra actually contains the active ingredient Sildenafil Citrate which is a selective inhibitor of Cyclic Guanosine Monophosphate (cGMP)-specific phosphodiesterase type 5 (PDE5).

This drug works efficiently with sexual stimulation. Erectile dysfunction is very common among older men whose sexual function tends to fall after they reach their 50s. But these days even younger men in their 30's and 40's are experiencing an increased incidence of erectile dysfunction.

Doctors can even recommend the drug to both younger and elder men who suffer from erection problems.

Solidification of the arteries, the blood vessels that supply blood to the penis, can occur during the teen years. The problem then develops by the time they reach the age of 20-30 years and more, hindering their ability to get and maintain an erection. Men suffering from diabetes and facing the problem of Erectile dysfunction can be assisted by this drug.

The drug should be ideally taken an hour before the sexual intercourse.

On the other hand, you can also take Viagra half an hour to 4 hours before the sexual intercourse. You don't require having food in order to take the drug. But you need to keep in mind that if you take it after a meal high in fats, it can take a little bit longer for you to experience its effects.

Most importantly, the misuse of Viagra should be avoided. It should be taken only under medical supervision. The drug doesn't have the power to help you ejaculate easily if you suffer from problems related to orgasm or even enhance your sexual appetite. It does not enhance sexual timing, so should not be used to treat premature ejaculation. Men also shouldn't expect the drug to take the erections to unexpected heights.

Word of Caution:

One should never take the drug for recreational purposes. One can end up suffering from minor erectile dysfunction due such abuse.



When Should You Use Viagra?

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