I am 20 years old. And I think I am getting mentally unstable. I cannot eat, think, sleep or do anything properly. I had feelings for a girl but she does not love me and I think this is the reason for everything. I have lost interest in everything. I need only some advice. Nothing more.

Ms. Samiksha JainPsychologist9yrs exp

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Hello, I can understand your pain at losing one very important person in life. You probably had hopes of spending long time with her and had plans for the future and now nothing is going to happen. All these thoughts might be causing you sadness, disappointment and some anxiety and anger on the other hand. While it's important to be an important part of someone else's life, yet it's also important to know when to call it off if it's not working anymore. 1. At this age it is common for boys and girls to get attracted to each other and spent some time together. But equally common is breakups when one or both see that their needs are too different now and the other person will not fit the requirements any more. While this process is very heart breaking, but it is also important so that you can meet different people and see who is your kind of person and who will help you in the next phase of life ie. Job, marriage children. 2. By going through different relationships you will also understand yourself better and discover many hidden qualities and weaknesses in you. It's your growing edge to work through your weaknesses and sharpen your qualities. You will also discover your passion, dreams and hobbies and interests. 3. I suggest that you look at this breakup as a learning lesson and an opportunity to improve on any thing that was your mistake and assess your life choices again. What was meant to go will go. Let it go and you carry on with your journey. 4. Being flexible and independant in relationships is important. There will be times when you might not have any body's support or company. That is the time to learn to be your own friend and give yourself that love which you want from a close friend. This is healthy self love and very important for self confidence and high self esteem. 5. Indulge yourself with meeting new people, going places, discovering your passion, hobbies etc. Spend time alone with yourself to nurture the person within you. 

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