I always worry about what people think of me. I get scared of social situations and always avoid going out so that I don't have to talk to people. People in college think I'm weird because I'm so quiet. Sometimes I also think about how meaningless life is. Seems like an exercise in futility. There's so many others like me out there. We all just want to be different and standout, don't we? That just seems foolish the more I think about it. We are all surprisingly mediocre. I don't let myself bond with people I should consider my close friends and family. It's always been difficult for me to do that ever since I was a child. This is just scraping the surface of the things that bother me. I think I need someone I can easily speak with.