Ideally, the decision to want to quit must come from the addict himself. In this case, there is a danger to his life (being diabetic already), if he continues, and therefore the decision must be made by responsible others. If this is difficult for you, do get the counsel and help of an elderly relative whom he respects and let him do the convincing. If he does not cooperate, then take the decision and call in the rehabilitation center to just take him away. He may be what people refer to as an addict on ‘skid row’ i.e. Only death can stop him – 20% of alcoholics are on skid row, world over. Knowing that someone else responsible has to make that decision for him and will do him the favor of a life-saving course of action, do so without any hesitation. Do not feel any guilt about doing this because you will surely save his life, and perhaps his health. He has to be admitted in a rehabilitation center for at least 6 months to get him out of this habit. Even after the rehabilitation he must attend AA meetings and continue this support for a long time. You will also need to attend some sessions and go for Al-anon meetings for your co-dependency issues. You cannot treat him in isolation because you have all gotten used to his drinking and have made some unhealthy adaptations to somehow cope. Your children will also have to attend meetings to work out their issues because of the father’s habit. In fact, they are all suffering from the Adult Children Of Alcoholics Syndrome ACOAs, which in effect means that they are genetically predisposed to alcoholism
or can have cross addiction problems and they will have similar traits of the abusing alcoholic but in a milder form. There are special support groups for them all over the world. Should they touch or indulge in alcohol or any addictive substances or behaviors, they could also become full-fledged addicts themselves. So you have a lot on your plate and must act effectively and firmly to bring all of you into therapy. If your husband refuses to go for rehabilitation, then some centers have a method of picking him up when he is totally sloshed and is not able to fight back
effectively. They will need your written consent before willing to take him in this manner. Make a serious plan with your children and whoever else’s support you can get and act on it fast.