Hello sir, one of my friend has a bad habit of masturbate since last 6-7 yrs regularly (as he told). Now he is worried that is this really bad for him and his future. And wants to quit. So please tell how he can stop it and how harmful is this for him. Thank you!

Dr. Saul PereiraPsychologist47yrs exp

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Masturbation is not really bad, it is the addiction to it that is bad. Not even the number of years is a problem but the frequency and compulsiveness to it is to be considered for its ill-effects. At his age he may feel it difficult and it can become addictive if he has alone time, if he obsesses about it, and if he is not into relationships. The problem with addiction to this is that he may go on to prefer masturbation to heterosexual contact, even when he is married. That obviously would be an insult to his wife and will lead to a lot of conflict. Heterosexual contact is very wholesome and the physiology is made exactly for penile and vaginal contact. He will instead enjoy a poor replica of this and not know or care for the difference. The second thing that can happen with addiction is that it will become compulsive and will have no boundaries or limits, since it can be done all by himself, whenever, wherever, and however too. The big problem a lot of children get into is the guilt around this. A useful way to discharge the energy is to get into contact games, or exercises, or even hobbies to channelize it. Also he should not spend too much time alone, and needs to keep his mind occupied with other interesting things and a lot of socializing. Even if he is not interested in marriage for whatever reasons it will help him to get into a friendship with a girl and enjoy the relationship where there will be a lot of excitement when he falls in love. Right now his hormones may be very active and his physiological apparatus is primed and ready for sexual stimulation. But because of his age and even otherwise it is important to develop good control and not feed into his impulses. Keeping himself occupied and living a healthy social life are the keys to manage his sexual drives. 

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