5 reasons your partner doesn't want to have sex anymore

There are innumerable explanations as to why couples in long-term relationships find themselves in situations when either one of the partner's starts avoiding sex for a reason the other cannot comprehend.

The explanation for your partner's behaviour may be due to an underlying medical issue or various emotional or psychological factors. Following are a few reasons why your partner does not want to have sex anymore:

1. Physical factors: your partner might be experiencing a loss of libido due to physical ailments, particularly ones pertaining to the endocrine and circulatory systems. Disorders such as diabetes, hypothyroidism, heart complications to name a few, affect the hormone levels in the body, which leads to the lack of sexual drive.

2. Psychological factors: Many mental and emotional factors also affect libido in both men and women. Stress and depression, which often cause sleep deprivation, are two of the biggest causes of unwillingness to have sex. Talk to your partner about what the root of the problem is and ascertain what is creating stress and triggering depression. Communication and counselling are the main ways of dealing with such a situation.

3. Excessive masturbation: If a person watches too much pornography and consequently indulges in masturbation frequently, sexual function is automatically lowered when it comes to performing during intercourse. If your partner masturbates too much, simply ask that the practice needs to be put an end to.

4. Lack of affection: When there is a lack of warmth and affection between partners, the desire to engage in sexual intercourse is automatically diminished. Communicate with your companion to determine ways in which you can rekindle love and passion in the relationship.

5. Addiction to narcotics: If your partner has developed an addiction to certain narcotics, such as nicotine, morphine and various anti-depressants that reduce sex drive, it could be the reason for not wanting to have sex.

The reasons for developing an aversion to sex are often extremely subjective and complex. Open and honest communications between partners may unravel the problem but in many cases, therapy and medical assistance provides the solution.



5 Reasons Your Partner Doesn't Want to Have Sex Anymore

1. Wash Your Hands Thoroughly - Before having sex, do remember to wash your hands. Maintaining such a basic sexual hygiene habit is important as you will be running your fingers over the tender parts of your partner. Since your hands would have come into contact with germs of all kinds, having sex with dirty hands can bring about infections of those parts. Just as you would wash your hands before having your food, don't skip this habit when it comes to having sex.

2. Communicate - Communication is vital for a healthy sex life, and you'll both feel extremely satisfied if you're on the same page. Whether you need to have conversations about STDs such as HIV, HPV or on different sexual positions and techniques, talking to one another can help you and your partner to understand each other better in between the sheets.

3. Reciprocate - Reciprocity can make or break your sex life. Sex can be satisfying only when you both you and your partner experience the same amount of pleasure. So if your partner focuses on your pleasure spots, make sure to return the favour by turning your attention to his/her erogenous zones.

4. Don't be Afraid to Ask - Good sex is also about letting your partner know what your desires are. By doing so, your partner would be able to respond better to what you want and you'll find your sex life improving for the better.

5. Don't Criticise - In case of any sexual issue that may arise between you and your partner, it's best to solve it together instead of blaming each other. Whatever suggestions you may have for each other, always put them forward in positive terms. Criticism may make your sex life bitter and can also adversely impact your relationship in the long run, so it's best to avoid it.



5 Do's + Don'ts for a Healthy Sex Life

5 mind reasons you might not be getting an orgasm

Sex is not only a physical need, sex is a great way to emotionally bond and get closer to your partner as well. Any dissatisfaction in the bedroom can affect other aspects of your life, and can lead to fights, squabbles and general unhappiness. The inability to orgasm can become a major bone of contention. There can be various reasons behind the inability to climax. Some of the common ones are detailed below:

1. Lack of stimulation

Studies show that only 25% of women reach climax during sexual intercourse. The remaining 75% of women require more stimulation, like fingers or even toys and tongues to reach orgasm. Amongst this is a subset of 10-15% of women who never reach orgasm. Thus, a large number of women require extra stimulation to achieve climax during sex. You must talk to your partner about putting in some extra effort and providing the extra stimulation you need to achieve climax.

2. Over-thinking

Many men and women over-think their actions in bed. From their expressions to how they are reacting and how they are making their partner feel - everything is under constant scrutiny and revision. This leads to a lot of stress, which can hinder your ability to reach orgasm. You need to relax in the bedroom, because whatever you do will feel good in some way or another. Your anxieties can also distract you from what is going on, which means you don't get the chance to fully experience the pleasures of sex. If it helps, speak to your partner about your anxieties and tell them what you are stressing about during sex.

3. Differences between men and women 

Men are visual creatures. This means that what they see turns them on. A woman's orgasm, on the other hand, happens in her head. Thus, men and women have different roots to their stimulation. Lack of an orgasm might mean either of these needs isn't being fulfilled. A great way to work around this and make sex more fun is to include a lot of foreplay in your love-making session. You can do this by trying out role-playing or using sex toys. Make sure to take it slow for a great build-up to your orgasm.

4. Performance issues

Porn has an impact on your sex life. It can increase your expectations to a considerable extent, which may not be fulfilled, thus hampering your experience in the bedroom. A lot of people become so focused on reproducing that experience that they forget that its real life. The focus on performance overwhelms their actual experience of sex, which results in an inability to reach orgasm. Try to accept the fact that you don't really have to perform for your partner. Your partner appreciates you for what you are, despite everything.

5. Mental blocks

A problem in the relationship, certain health conditions like depression, past trauma and negative social conditioning can all have negative impacts on your ability to orgasm. Talk to your partner about past trauma if you have any, and what your triggers are. Consider speaking to a sex therapist as mental health issues should never be neglected. Depression hits the libido hard, and the problem is only compounded by antidepressants. Negative social conditioning can only be helped by therapy, so try to reach out to a mental health professional.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'consult'.
Related Tip: Why You Must Try Kegel Exercises for a Happier Sex Life

5 Mind Reasons You Might Not Be Getting an Orgasm

In today's time there are various factors, which affects our relation with our partner and among such factors is low libido. Low libido or a decreased sexual activity can affect a relationship in a big way. In some extreme cases, the impact is such that it leads to irreconcilable marital discords. Time and again, an individual, irrespective of their age, sex or occupation can go through periods of low libido. Decreased sexual desire over a longer period of time needs thorough investigation. It could be an indication of something big and serious lying ahead. 
7 critical factors that attribute to low libido: 

1. Hormonal imbalance: women, mostly menopausal and postmenopausal, experience low libido. This is because during menopause, there is a significant drop in the oestrogen level. Reduced oestrogen level can have a huge impact on sexual desires and performance. It can also make the vagina dry, resulting in painful penetration and intercourse. Hormonal imbalance or changes during pregnancy can also result in low libido in females. In males, low libido has been found to be associated with decreased levels of testosterone. 

2. Stress: an individual's mental and emotional state is greatly reflected in their sexual performance. A sound mental health can enhance a performance thousand folds. On the contrary, factors like depression, anxiety and stress, lowers the sexual desires in a person. To enjoy a healthy and normal sexual life, it is important to keep stress and chronically blue moods at bay.

3. Sound sleep to the rescue: the benefits of a sound sleep are beyond imagination. A good 6 - 8 hours of sleep can do your sexual desires or libido a world of good. A sleep deprived soul will be agitated and cranky, both on and off the bed. Continuous sleep deprivation can also lower the testosterone level, resulting in low libido.

4. Medical condition: medical conditions like diabetes, cardiac problems, high blood pressure, or ailments of the coronary artery can rupture an individual's sexual life immensely. Improper functioning of the thyroid glands is another factor contributing to low libido. In such cases, it is best to consult a physician at the earliest. Rest legs syndrome can also contribute to low libido. It is a condition whereby, a male experience an uncontrollable urge to move his legs.

5. Smoking: a killer habit, which affects a person's sexual activity is smoking. Drug abuse and drinking (to some extent) can be equally responsible for a low libido.

6. Change in weight: a sudden change in body weight (gain or loss) can play a significant role in low libido. Take pride in your body structure. There is nothing to be ashamed of.

7. Take a break: boredom can mask your sexual life greatly. Break the monotony, take short breaks, go on vacations and low libido will be a thing of the past.

7 Things That Might Be Causing Your Low Libido

Link between Erectile Dysfunction and Premature Ejaculation

Erectile Dysfunction is the inability of a man to achieve a penetrable erection while premature ejaculation is a man's inability to take control of his ejaculations during or before sexual intercourse. These conditions are two of the most common sexual dysfunctions observed among men. The prevalence of these two conditions can be found among all socioeconomic groups and among men of varying ages.

The incidence of premature ejaculation is higher and hence more common among both young and old men. Studies show that an estimated 40% of men suffer from the condition of premature ejaculation. On the other end, research also reveals that erectile dysfunction is associated with advancing age though a host of other factors like diabetes, kidney and heart diseases and certain medications can also be responsible.

How are these two conditions actually related?

It is found that in most men who have been primarily diagnosed with erectile dysfunction, the secondary concern has been premature ejaculation. The reason for both the problems is more or less the inadequate flow of blood to the penis required for a penetrable erection.

Moreover, in some cases, it was found that premature ejaculation occurred when a person was diagnosed with both mild and acute erectile dysfunction. In a similar manner, it was found that among men who suffered from ED and required constant stimulation to maintain a penetrable erection found out the instances of occurrence of premature ejaculation was high.

In some cases, it was found that the chief cause of erectile dysfunction was premature ejaculation. Because of these reasons, the two conditions are often found to co-exist and overlap one another.

In cases where both the conditions exist, treatment for ED is recommended to be sought first.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'Consult'.

What is the Link between Erectile Dysfunction and Premature Ejaculation?

6 Unexpectedly easy ways to give your sex life a whole new dimension

New Year is a good the time for new beginnings. At times our sex lives needs to be revived too. After a few years together, a couple’s sex life may begin to stagnate. A boring sex life can negatively impact your relationship as well. But by employing some very easy tricks in the bedroom, you can bring back the passion and add spark to your life. 
Can’t figure out where to start? Here are 6 tips and tricks to help you out. 

1. Be spontaneous: One of the main reasons a couple’s sex life dwindles is because they fall into a routine. Whether it’s the position you choose, or the sequence of events- right from foreplay to the actual intercourse- every couple has their own set routine. Break this monotony and try out new positions that can greatly enhance your pleasure. Also, try having sex somewhere else in the house that you haven’t before to spice things up.

2. Don’t be shy: Sex is one of the most intimate acts you can share with someone. However, sometimes you may find yourself being unable to open up to your partner about what gets you in the mood. This can make sex an unfulfilling experience. Try telling your partner what you’d like him/her to do. You might end up discovering that both of you share a common fantasy you hadn’t spoken about before.

3. Explore all erogenous zones: There are a lot of erogenous zones on a man and woman’s body. Take your time and get to know every single one of them. If you don’t know where they are, explore your partner’s body and see what turns him/her on and where. This is a great exercise that also sets the foundation for more fulfilling sex in the future. 

4. Experiment with your lingerie: Clothes can be a turn on or a turn off depending on what you wear. Try experimenting with your lingerie. A host of options are available out there for both men and women. These days you can even buy edible lingerie on leading online shopping sites. Choose bright shades like red, as they’ve been proven to increase arousal.

5. Play around with sex toys: Introducing sex toys in your bedroom can prove to be very stimulating as well as exciting for both you and your partner. Sex toys come in all shapes and sizes, for both men and women. You can take your pick from vibrators and vibrating rings, handcuffs, etc; even lubricants and gels can be used to enhance pleasure and make sex more exciting.

6. Shave your pubic hair: Another way to give your sex life a whole new dimension, shaving off your pubic hair can increase the sensitivity in your genitals making sex a more pleasurable experience. Besides, for many shaved genitals have a visual appeal and cause intense arousal, which is very important when it comes to having a satisfying sex life. 

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'Consult'.

6 Easy Ways to Give Your Sex Life a New Dimension in 2016

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