While some people see tears as a sign of weakness, for others crying is a crucial way of dealing with grief. Though as children we re told not to cry and to  keep a hold  of our emotions, letting go of a few tears can help alleviate grief and emotional distress. 

Here are a few reasons crying could be a good idea when dealing with loss.

Crying can stimulate the release of endorphins: Crying cleanses the mind of negative emotions and allows you to express your emotions. Crying can be described as a reaction to pain and in order to control pain, the body releases endorphins. Endorphins are also known as happy hormones as they block the transmission of pain signals and create a sense of contentment. These chemicals can take a little time to have an effect and hence in most cases, you will notice an improvement in your mood after a good cry.
Crying elevates the mood: Crying can help reduce your body s manganese levels. A higher than normal manganese level can heighten anxiety, irritability, tiredness and emotional disturbances. By lowering manganese levels, the brain is left with enough space for happier emotions and hence crying can help elevate a person s mood.
Crying stimulates the body s parasympathetic nervous system: The parasympathetic nervous system controls a number of functions including heart rate. Crying can stimulate this system and trigger a state of relaxation. For this reason, you may feel sleepy after crying. This gives your body time to relax and deal with the problem at hand with a calmer mind.
Crying helps deal with stress: A stressful experience or emotional situation can cause a build-up of stress hormones known as cortisol. As the levels of cortisol increase in the body, it goes into flight or fight mode as an automatic response to stress. Crying reduces the cortisol levels and helps relieve tension and stress almost immediately.
Crying is cathartic: Every day we are exposed to conflicts and stressful situations that can build up into resentments and leave a person feeling anxious and depressed. Sometimes, giving vent to emotions and crying can help release these pent-up feeling and heap cleanse the mind of these negative emotions. Crying also allows us to open ourselves up to the people around and can improve the levels of intimacy between them. In this way, it can help a person become part of a community.

Crying - Can it Help You Overcome Sadness?

Do you believe that the world is a hostile place and you are a victim? Are you the one who often doubts his or her abilities? If so, you might be showing signs of low self-esteem. Interestingly, self-esteem has nothing do with your actual ability or talent. Your looks, weight or skills are not responsible for your low self esteem. It largely depends upon the fact that how you value yourself.

It has been observed in most cases that self-esteem is often affected by a number of reasons, including ill-health, unpleasant memories from the past, and termination of relationships. Low self-esteem is generally marked in survivors of physical or sexual abuse, victims of racial discrimination or people who have had a traumatic past life.

If you don t pay attention towards this issue, you might end up developing certain serious mental disorders. Low self-esteem is also the root cause behind the occurrence of mental disorders like borderline personality disorder, depression, etc. However, there is nothing to worry about it. There are certain simple things that are useful in building up your self-esteem.

Here s all that you need to do to start believing in yourself and be confident about your capabilities:

1. Remember your strong points: Make three separate lists of your strengths; achievements and your qualities that you admire. Take help from your friends, parents and other well-wishers for preparing these lists. These lists will help you in understanding your abilities and goodness. You will be able to believe in your strengths. You must read through these lists at least once daily.

2. Be positive: Optimism and a positive approach towards life are the key to success. Your self-esteem is influenced by the fact that how you look at life. Life is not a bed of roses. It is unavoidable that you will have to face critical situations or problems in life. But, what is important is to face them with courage and a faith in your own abilities. Be positive and stop developing negative thoughts about yourself. Get rid of thoughts like  I am a loser ;  I can t get rid of this problem ; etc.

3. Take care of your body: Your outward appearance sometimes works wonders in lifting up your inner-self and spirits. Keep yourself clean, trim your beard or hairs; cut your nails; don t forget to floss your teeth and maintain overall personal hygiene to develop a feeling of goodness.

4. Sleep well: A good night s sleep is essential for boosting up your self - esteem.

5. Eat right: A balanced diet is a key to good health. Eating the right food in the right way keeps your mental and physical health all right. Include minerals and vitamins in your regular meals. Avoid distractions like television or radio while taking meals.

6. Exercise: Regular workouts keep you away from mental-ill health.

7. Be cool and comfortable first: When it comes to your dressing, try to put on attires that you can carry well. Wear stuffs that you love the most.

How to Build your Self Esteem?

Epilepsy is a form of chronic disorder and it is characterized by recurrent seizures. The episodes of epileptic seizures may differ from person to person. These seizures could be a result of genetic disorder or a result of trauma or stroke. During a seizure, a patient may also experience symptoms of neurological disorders and sometimes lose consciousness.

Medical help for epilepsy
Epilepsy itself cannot be cured using medication, but proper medicines help in eliminating recurrent seizures. These medicines stabilize the electrical activity within the brain preventing seizures.

How effective is the medication for epilepsy?
The success of controlling seizures using medicines depends on the type and severity of the epilepsy. Medicines for epilepsy are usually very effective and may fully keep seizures under control. However, controlling seizures caused due to brain problems may be more difficult. Usually, epilepsy medicines can control seizures for a long period of time when they are taken regularly.

When is medical help needed?
The decision about when to start medicines for epilepsy is a tricky one. This is because a first seizure cannot confirm whether a person has an on-going epilepsy problem. A second seizure may occur after many years or may not happen at all. Prediction of seizures is also quite difficult.

The severity of seizures also indicates when to start medicines for treatment. In case a first seizure is quite severe, medication should be started at once. Some people have very mild seizures even though they may be recurring in nature, and medication can be avoided in this situation.

All the pros and cons must be thought over before starting medications for the treatment of epilepsy. It is advisable to wait for a second seizure and then start medications for treatment. In most cases, medication is started after a second seizure occurs, twelve months within the first seizure. You should always consult a doctor to know when you need to start taking medicines to treat the condition.

For making the most out of the medicines to control seizures, you should follow certain steps:
1. You must take medications exactly as your doctor has prescribed.
2. Before switching to generic versions of your medicines or before taking other prescribed medicines, you must consult your doctor.
3. You should never stop taking the medicines.
4. In case you experience enhanced depression, mood swings and suicidal thoughts, you should talk to your doctor immediately.
5. In case you have migraine, you should let your doctor know so that he can prescribe you anti-epileptic medicines, which also prevent migraines.

Medicines cannot treat the underlying cause of epilepsy, but these help in controlling seizures and this is the most common symptom of epilepsy. Medication should be started at a proper time and must be continued without stopping.

When to Seek Medical Help for Epilepsy


A new relationship involves a lot of weighing from both the sides. Learn what really matters to win people over in this post. When you want to build a new relationship, whether it is for work, business, personal, marriage, friendship etc there are several factors that help take off and bloom the relationship. These factors are broadly the same in different age groups as far as psychological impact matters. Some of the most important influential factors from a psychological point of view have been highlighted here. 

1. Presentation- When you want to draw someone into relationship with you for any reason, it is important that you present yourself at you best levels be it physical or mental. Like they say that the first impression is the best impression, your display of you strengths creates an impression that helps people decide what they want to do with you. This doesn't mean you should hide all your weaknesses but highlighting your strengths is as important as making your weaknesses clear. Always learn to put your best foot forward as sometimes that itself may not be enough. You can't really send your neighbour for your job interview!! There are many instances when people send different photographs in their applications and different ones appear for the exams. This is mere cheating and not winning.

2. Plan – Let people know what you want to do with them and what they can they can do with you. No one can say they don’t have a plan. There is always some plan. Knowing it strengthens why you want to have that relationship in the first place. Otherwise it's like something which is there but you can never want to do anything with! When you are honest with your plans and they workout as you described it, it creates confidence in relationship or else it is destroyed forever. You can cheat a person with your plans once, not forever.

3. Possibilities- Will this relationship bring me trouble? Obviously nobody wants to get into a relationship with anybody that brings them trouble be it physical or mental. Next question is whether it will benefit me? Small or big depends on person's needs. Some relationships neither bring us trouble nor benefits us, such relationships are better than the ones which can cause harm.

4. Potential – Question. Does this relationship you are trying to develop have any possibilities of growth a few or many years down the line. Obviously we have a lot of friends who wither by passing of time. Does this relationship have an expiry date irrespective of how well or bad it goes? Like when we join college we know for sure that the friends will be with us till the duration of the course and that's it. We will know that if we study together it will help us achieve great grades in college and hence a great life later. These kind of growth possibilities or possibilities of deterioration are important to be well aware of and will naturally decide the course of relationships.

5. Progress – No matter what our initial assessments are, how the relationships helps us fare in the outside world will ultimately decide the future of any relationship. Loss, sorrow, tragedy, degradation in any aspect of life, insults, injury, loss of health etc will never help any relationship continue or last.

6. Partnerships – When we want to build a relationship with someone, the best way to do it is to obviously partner with that person in as many activities as possible. The more interested a person is the more activities that person will involve you in and try to do it with you. This type of partnership activities, be it spending a few hours in the evening, or a few minutes on phone, or an association of months or years are a foolproof way to show you are interested. Conversely a person who doesn't partner with you in anything is extremely unlikely to ever have any sort of relationship with you. Partnership in activities is the only way to show and know that you are interested or the other person is interested respectively. After all chasing the moon, stars and rainbow are activities of people who don’t realize its out of their reach. Sensible people are busy with what their eyes see, hands feel, ears listen, tongue tastes and thinking perceives as appropriate.

7. Positioning attitudes- As a tree bends with the winds to prevent from cracking, we all have to be flexible with our attitudes towards each other. Being too rigid about our protocol on how relationships should run irrespective of the reality and circumstances of the person we are having a relationship with is naturally going to break relationships. After all a doctor who heals and prevents all illnesses is better than a doctor who abuses his patients for falling ill but never does anything for them. Eg: You get bed and good food in a hotel as well as at your home. A hotel will provide food only on payment of money, but family will provide it whenever your hungry. Hence hotels can never expect the same emotions as family can, and this is as natural as it should be. Hence be careful what you want from a relationship. Whether you want to be treated as a hotel or family is entirely how you play yourself with others. After all only families can expect loyalty not hotels.

8. Politeness- In any relationship, many years down the line, what our long term memory retains is how comfortable we were in that relationship. Even if we profit from a particular relationship, the fact that it shook us mentally and emotionally will never allow us to go back or retain that relationship. Life is short and the only thing that matters is to spend it comfortably. Not destroy our peace for some benefit that destroys our peace of mind.

9. Personation- While sending a representative of your organization for a client meeting may work in business, you cant really send a representative to meet you wife or kids at home. In personal relationship, lack of your physical presence obviously means that you don’t have time for them. In any relationship, individuality matters a lot. Just imagine, if all actors acted exactly the same in movies, why would you prefer any particular one over the other as your favourite? The nuances and differences in our personalities are what makes us all unique. We are not robots from a particular brand to behave exactly the same way. If a person in a relationship doesn't sense your individuality you are wasting their time by trying to have a relationship with them, especially a personal one.

10. Positive reinforcement- When we get into a relationship, it is important that we feel good about ourselves and what we are doing. If you feel like a shoplifter entering a shop, you will not feel good about that relationship. When a shopkeeper welcomes us, shows us his products, tells us their details and provides all the explanations on how we will be well off with the product, provides his guarantee for it, confirms its essence, many people buy it even if they don’t compulsively need it. It’s the same in relationships. On the same side if a shopkeeper is arrogant, avoidant, abusive, insulting etc you are very unlikely to buy anything in that shop because you are not sure that the shopkeeper means any good and will be happy with the shopkeeper s product. The experience of buying is as important as the product we buy. Nobody is happy about something they got when they weren't treated the right way or is interested in retaining it when they don’t get good service for it.

11. Persistence on all Ps – Obviously when we want relationships to last, we need to be persistent on all the above P's. Otherwise it wont take long for a relationship to be counted in “once upon a time”!! A simple conversation even if for a few minutes every now and then when you need it may make it seem that you are still there for a person. Without even that people may even find it hard to remember that they even had something to do with you sometime before keeping in mind the the numerous activities we involve daily to maintain our lifestyles.

“KNOWING IS DOING AND NOT KNOWING IS UNDOING EVEN IF DOING!”

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How To Win Over New Relationships

Stress happens when the demands placed on you are too much and cause a burden on you, for example, work, school or relationships surpass your capacity or ability to adapt. Sometimes stress can be a little beneficial in the form of a support that gives the drive to some people to get their work done on time and meet due dates and deadline. However, an extraordinary measure of stress can create health and well-being issues. They can lead to problems in cardiovascular and central nervous systems and take a serious emotional problem.

Untreated and chronic stress can bring about serious health conditions including tension, sleeping disorder, muscle pain, hypertension and a weak immune system. Stress can fuel other diseases and disorders, for example, heart diseases, depression and obesity most of the times. By discovering positive, healthy and solid ways to oversee stress as it happens, a significant number of these negative wellbeing outcomes can be decreased. Here are five effective ways to manage stress:

Take a break from the stress: It might appear to be hard to divert yourself from a major work schedule. However, when you give yourself consent to step away from it, you let yourself have sufficient energy to accomplish something else, which can help you have another viewpoint or practice methods to feel less stressed. It is critical not to ignore the stress factor. However, even twenty minutes to yourself is useful.
Workout: Exercise benefits your emotions and brain along with your body. We continue finding out about the long term advantages of a normal exercise schedule. In any case, even a ten or fifteen-minute walk, run, swim or yoga session during an unpleasant time can give a quick impact that can keep you going for a few hours.
Laugh and try to stay happy: Our brains are interconnected with our feelings and outward appearances. When individuals are stressed, its shows up on their face. So laughter can alleviate some of that pressure and enhance the circumstance.
Get social backing: Try to call a friend or send an email to someone regarding your problems. When you impart your worries or sentiments to someone else, it helps calm the stress. In any case, it is critical that the individual whom you converse with is somebody whom you trust and someone who can understand and accept you. In case that your family is the stressor, for instance, it may not ease your stress in which case, you may need a friend.
Meditate: Meditation and prayer can help the brain and body to unwind and concentrate properly. It can help people see new points of view, create self-sympathy and forgiveness. While practising meditation, individuals can discharge feelings that may have been bringing about physical pain. Much like a workout, research has demonstrated that practising meditation can prove to be very helpful.

5 Effective Ways to Manage Stress

Each and every person on this planet has to deal with the loss of a loved one at some point of their life or the other. It is an undeniable and unavoidable part of the human existence. However, at times, the grief can affect the person so much that their psychological, emotional and physical health may be affected. Their normal day- to-day functioning may be affected as a result of their extreme reaction to the loss of their loved one. In such a case it is ideal to seek treatment from a certified medical professional such as a counselor or psychologist. If the condition is even more serious and the patient requires help to treat him or her, then it is advisable to go to a psychiatrist.

However, the following tips commonly given by mental health professionals may help to deal with such a loss:

-Accepting one's emotion: sometimes an individual may remain in denial about the loss of the loved one or about his or her own reaction to it. This increases the negative emotion as it does not find a medium of expression. The person withdraws into himself or herself, and is slowly unable to conduct the usual daily activities. The first step therefore is to fully accept the reality of the event and one's own response to it. It can help to speak to a friend or family member about one's own response, or even release the grief by crying. Such cathartic avidities are the first step.

-Taking care of oneself: often after the death of a loved one, an individual may become wary of his or her own condition and fail to look after himself or herself. This should be avoided. Normal diet, exercise and activities are required.

-Channeling grief into productive activity: constantly focusing on the loss of the loved one can increase the trauma and stress. Sometimes it helps to focus on helping others, e.g. Volunteering at a charity or assisting others in some way. Even taking up artistic pursuits or any productive hobby proves to be beneficial.


Coping with the Loss of Loved One

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