One of the most common personality disorders, BPD or borderline personality disorder often remains undiagnosed or repressed and gets passed off as mood swings or a volatile disposition. However this disorder is much more than just mood swings as it can seriously affect the quality of a person s life. The primary manifestation of this disorder is in the way you think about yourself and others which result in the work that you need to do on a daily basis.

How does BPD manifest in your life?
The most common ways Borderline personality disorder can manifest in your life is with extreme mood swings or emotions, a discernable pattern in relationships becoming unstable after sometime, impulsive behavior, and a self image which is distorted. BPD thus affects how you view yourself, how you feel about others and you resultant behavior in general. Some of the typical signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder are mentioned below.

Persistent feelings of emptiness

Anger in inappropriate or unnecessary places, losing your temper very frequently, resulting in physical fights
Fearing abandonment intensely, whether it is real or imagined and thus going huge lengths to stop it from happening
Extreme instability in relationships which may cause a partner to be liked one moment and then hated the next
People with BPD also tend to be suicidal which is often caused by the fear of rejection or separation
Engaging in risky and impulsive behaviors such as
Engaging in unsafe sex despite being aware of the implications
Splurging money on gambling
Leaving a good job suddenly
A tendency to indulge in drugs
Binge eating
Reckless driving
Suddenly terminating a healthy and positive relationship
Sudden changes in values and self-identity and goals and feeling low about yourself as a result
Causes of Borderline personality disorder
In most cases borderline personality disorder can t be exactly attributed to a single cause and in most cases, is a combination of factors. While genetic or hereditary predisposition can cause BPD it may also be triggered by other factors. Also, not curbing mal-traits in young children or encouraging such behaviors may lead to BPD as they grow up. Some of the factors that contribute to BPD are

Genetics
Abnormalities in the brain
Childhood incidents which were stressful
Personality traits which have worsened
If you think you have been displaying some of the symptoms for a fairly prolonged period, it is advisable that you visit a mental health professional for counseling and start with therapy as advised by them.

Borderline Personality Disorder - How It Manifests In Your Life?

Saif and Kareena show you how to bridge the age gap perfectly in relationships

There?s a lot to learn from the love story of the 10th nawab of Pataudi, Saif Ali Khan, and the Bollywood actress, Kareena Kapoor. Despite the 13 year age gap between them, the two have a very strong and mature relationship. So what keeps the two sticking together through thick and thin? here?s how saif and Kareena have bridged the age gap to emerge as a powerful couple.

1. They know that age is just a number

For saif and kareena the 13-year difference is not an issue. They know that what matters, in the end, is not how old you are but the kind of personality you have. Both saif and kareena have a mature personality, and they gel perfectly well with each other. This is the reason why they are able to connect and maintain a strong and healthy relationship.

2. They care about each other?s family

Kareena has a very strong relationship with Sharmila Tagore, Saif?s mother. Not only that, Kareena has also made sure she is on good terms with saif?s children from his previous marriage as well. Accepting each other?s family and past is a very important step in making a relationship work. Not only that, their families act as a support group for them, which helps them going on despite the difference of years between them.

3. They share common interests

Another thing that makes their relationship work is the fact that they share several common interests, which help them in coming closer and making their bond stronger. Saif and Kareena often go on trips together, attend cricket matches together and make it a point to go out for regular romantic dinner dates.

4. They respect each others? views 

Nothing could be more important in a relationship than respecting each other?s decisions. The pataudi family tradition had women changing to Islam after marriage, with even Sharmila Tagore converting after her marriage. However, Kareena did not want to, and Saif fully supported her decision. Even their marriage ceremony was a mishmash of their differing religions. So, if you want your relationship to work, be very open and accepting of each other?s differences and views.


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Saif and Kareena Show How to Bridge the Age Gap Perfectly in Relationships

Do you know why some people accomplish more and generally are much happier in their lives?
 
The field of Positive Psychology explains this. Research says, one of the signature strengths that such people have is "Gratitude. Gratitude makes them take better care of themselves physically and mentally. It also makes people engage in more proactive and healthy way. It promotes the motivation for exercise, healthy diet and willingness to wriggle out of any negative situations in life. It helps boost your immune system.  Since it makes you more optimistic and alert, you cope better with stress and feel healthier.

How to Have An Attitude of Gratitude?

1) Be Mindful of What You Have - Being thankful for very small things actually bring a great amount of joy. Have gratitude for small things like sunlight, rain, flowers, a cup of tea, a caring spouse, a child's laughter. It gives us the resilience to cope with tougher situations.

2) Keep a Gratitude Journal - Every night before going to bed, write down "What was the best thing that happened to you that day.  It fosters better sleep and a sense of well being and satisfaction.

3) Reframe Challenging Situations - It's not the situation but our perception of the situation that makes it challenging. You can reframe your reactions and respond by saying that "I may have a very demanding boss, but I have become more organized, patient. It will help you to attend to your work and be cheerful.

4) Practice saying Thank You - It's very simple. When you buy a bus ticket, just smile and say 'Thank You. Feel the first raindrops on your face and smile in gratitude for all the life it brings.

5) Focus your attention outwards - According to Emmons, a US psychology professor, people who are more aware of the positives in their lives tend to focus their attention outside of themselves. They feel complete, satisfied and fulfilled in their lives and are capable of helping the less fortunate ones.

If you have any questions, please click on "Consult Privately.

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5 Reasons Why Some People Accomplish More And Are Much Happier

Manic depression, also known as bipolar disorder in recent days, is a major mood disorder characterized by hypomanic or manic episodes (deviation from one's usual mood along with abnormally high energy levels). Mania involves sleeplessness, along with psychosis, hallucinations, rage, grandiose delusions or paranoia. Mania or hypomania isn t usually harmful to the patient and they might exhibit increased capacity for work and creativity. Depressive episodes however, can be debilitating and often life threatening as the person becomes self-destructive and suicidal in many instances. 

The extent of mood swings can vary from extreme to very mild. They can occur progressively or suddenly and might last for few days to weeks. Patients affected by bipolar disorder may experience disturbances in thinking apart from depressive or manic episodes. Distortions of perception and impaired social functioning are also not uncommon. The cause of bipolar disorder is not fully understood like most mental health conditions and is often thought to be hereditary.

The extent of the seriousness of the bipolar symptoms varies from person to person. In some people, the disorder is not full blown and they don t exhibit all the symptoms. Others who aren t that lucky might have to be hospitalized multiple times in their lives as the symptoms creep into their work and personal life and make living a normal life a tough challenge. 

Psychotic symptoms such as disorganized thinking, hallucinations and delusions might make a person do things that demand the urgency of hospitalization to keep them safe from their suicidal impulses. These symptoms might need to be urgently addressed by a psychiatrist and with the help of medications, the person might be able to regain control of their lives.

The symptoms of bipolar disorder are many and can be mainly categorized into two (sometimes overlapping) categories of mania or hypomania and depression:

Manic symptoms include: 

Grandiose delusions (delusion of grandeur) 
Racing thoughts which are often disconnected
Sense of euphoria or false elation
Irritability without cause
Hampered social functioning
Increased sexual inclination and risky sexual behavior
Hyperactivity
Increase in talking volume or speed
Impaired judgment
Reduced sleep requirements owing to extra energy levels
Increased productivity and creativity
Depressive symptoms include:

Abnormal eating patterns like over or under-eating to the extent of severe medical complications accompanied by drastic changes in weight
Difficulty in concentration, making decisions and remembering
Lack of energy or fatigue 
Contemplating about death for prolonged periods of time and suicidal behavior
Oversleeping, insomnia or early awakening
Persistent pessimism 
Irritability and restlessness
Feeling of hopeless and negative attitude
Mood stabilizers, such as lithium are commonly employed to treat bipolar disorder. Anti convulsants, benzodiazepines and anti psychotics can also be used in the treatment. Along with medications, support from family and friends is of the utmost importance as they need to help provide all the support required in making the person functional and healthy.

Manic Depressive Disorder - 11 Signs to Help You Spot it 

You might be feeling that spending time on any social media network is a simple way to pass time and is a common habit. But a recent study by University of Chicago Booth School of Business says that social networking sites can be more addictive, than alcohol. The desire to consume alcohol can be controlled and turned down, but the desire to check Facebook is simply uncontrollable for most people, and it s a serious addiction.

About the study
The ground breaking study was done on 250 people in and around Germany aged between 18 and 85 years of age. They were sent messages at specific intervals to report their desires and cravings. It is found that most people had the desire to sleep and have sex during the day that they were able to control. But the desire for checking Facebook was much higher.

Reasons for Facebook addiction

One of the major reasons is that availability of Facebook is much easier and higher than alcohol availability.
Also, it is thought that the cost of checking Facebook is much less than consuming some amount of alcohol on a regular basis.
Even if a man wants to resist his desire, but due to easy availability and lesser cost, he is prone to use it again and again.
Alcohol consumption is prohibited in public and during office hours in many countries. But checking Facebook updates have no restrictions. People can check it whenever they feel the desire.
The most shocking part is the urges drove the people to such an extent, that they couldn t even resist themselves even if they wanted to do so.
Effects of Facebook addiction

Drainage of time: No matter how good we feel while checking Facebook updates, can you deny that it s simply a waste of time?
Self esteem reduced: When you see your peers enjoying their life with flying colors, no wonder you will feel depressed. But we are reluctant to believe this fact, that nobody shows his tragic part of life on Facebook. So, whom you think is the happiest person in the world, may be the saddest and is drowned in his own miseries.
Remedy of this so called addiction
The study says that when we are much worn out, we are unable to control our desire and our will power is depleted.

So, if you find yourself posting your status on Facebook at the midnight instead of sleeping, then it is high time you should try to come out of this addiction and give yourself a better life and health.

Facebook Vs Alcohol - Which Is More Addictive?

Unlike what you may think, anxiety is a common emotional response in a situation where we are worried about an outcome. It is, in fact, beneficial to us as it keeps us alert and charged for a reaction. Anxiety disorder, however, comes when you lose control over your reaction and let it take control of your life in a way that disables you from living a normal life. 
The first thing to do as a positive step is to accept that you have a disorder. Mental health problems are as big as physical problems. Just like the body needs to be treated to cure a disease, the mind too can be treated to cure you of your problems. The next thing to do is to know what type of disorder you are suffering from to get specific treatment for it.

Connection between anxiety and depression:
Anxiety is not just incessant worrying. It is sometimes an obsessive compulsive disorder that can takeover your life or a terrifying phobia that can prevent you from doing things that are routine for others. Over a period of time, living with such a disorder can take an emotional toll leading to depression. 
The chances of developing depression in addition to anxiety is quite high. In fact, almost half of all people with major depression also suffer from severe and persistent anxiety. In many cases people suffering from post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and anxiety are also victims of depression.

Symptoms of anxiety and depression disorder
Constant fear and worry
Loss of interest in normal life, hobbies and activities
Insomnia and fatigue with inability to relax
Panic attacks
Feeling of sadness and worthlessness

Coping with anxiety and depression disorder
The first and most important thing to know is that both conditions are treatable and patients who get regular care, medication and support from friends and family can come back to living a normal life. Here are some of the treatments available:

1. Medication: Taking proper medication is very important as it acts quickly and is quite safe. Most people do not take medication, such as sleeping pills, fearing they might get addicted to them, which is a myth. Also, medications prescribed by your doctor are safe and specific that is why they have been prescribed.

2. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): It is used to first figure out what the cause behind the anxiety or depression. It is then used to teach people to manage their fears, anxieties, and depressive symptoms and also learn how to take control of their emotions. Another therapy used for treating depression is Emotive Behaviour therapy.

3. Lifestyle modification: In order to overcome, anxiety and depression, certain lifestyle changes are required, such as one should exercise daily at least for 30 minutes and eat a healthy diet.

4. Counselling: Counselling helps the person to overcome the oppressive thoughts and cope up with the feeling of worthlessness.

5. Group therapy: Knowing you are not alone with your pains and fears can often come as a big relief. Not only will the patient benefit from joining a local support group, the care giver will also learn how to cope with the developments of the disorder and how they can continue to provide care and support to their loved ones.

How to Cope with Anxiety and Depression Disorder

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