HOW TO BOUNCE BACK FROM FAILURE

“It's fine to celebrate success, but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure,” Bill Gates said. We always shower praise on those who have triumphed. Very rarely do we examine all the times the successful people have failed, and analyze how they turned their “luck” around. In this tip, you will understand how to turn failure into success and bounce back with more fervour.

1. A SUCCESSFUL MINDSET: If you’re striving to achieve anything then failure is inevitable. “Whenever you’re trying a new experiment, whether it’s a new job, a new product, a new hobby, a new boyfriend or girlfriend–whatever it is–you need to give some thought to what is your strategy and which are the possible ways to achieve it. Do you have any plan B or plan C if plan A fails? What will you do if nothing works out...and how to minimise the losses as well as taking advantage of the opportunities that you have. Assessing your opportunities and threats to success is very important. When a newly wedded girl comes to stay with her In laws, she might need to have a number of ways in her kitty to make her place in the new household rather than just stick to a few traditional ones. If one technique doesn't work, try something else. Disaster strikes when creativity is not given a place and failure was not factored in. Feeling helpless doesn't add upto success. Optimism is what people need to bounce back with.

2. LEARN AND IMPROVE WITH EACH FAILURE: Failure is just an opportunity to learn and improve. It’s a teaching moment that should be analyzed with a practical, clear mind. It helps to see mistakes as stepping stones to learning and improving and using it as an opportunity to bounce back. Every person should behave like a scientist with a mind open to exploring, assessing, making mistakes and changing. Mistakes must be embraced as being part of the process of success. If we don’t make mistakes it means that we’re not trying, and if we’re not trying then we’re not learning and getting better. Your self-worth should not rest on perfectionism, but rather value your ability to accept and learn from your mistakes. Not everyone is willing to admit when they’re wrong, which can hamper progress and relationships. When Meena and Arun started dating each other, they didn't know each other well and tried to impress each other in ways that was not working out well for both of them. It was very frustrating for them to see that their relationship was not working out. In counselling, they realised that they were not asking what each can do to impress the other. Meena told Arun that she would like to be taken out to plays and theatre by her future partner and Arun told Meena that he would like to take weekend trips to nearby destinations to get to know his partner well. When they both started doing what the other appreciated, they got to know each other better and relationship started blooming. Thus Arun and Meena assessed the situation, were open to discussion and found an amicable solution instead of thinking of their previous efforts as failure and giving up. 

3. LOVE YOUR CRITICS: How do you feel when your work gets criticised repeatedly by your boss, manager or your husband. It mighty be hurtful and demeaning to hear critical feedback, but if many people are saying the same things about your work or behaviour, then maybe it's time to give it a serious thought. When Saira was often told that she wasn't cooperative enough in team activities and tends to slacken and pass on work to other members, her mind started working. She had got the same comments in her previous organisations. She started seeing a grain of truth in this feedback and took steps to rectify complaints that stood out common in all the feedbacks and reworked her way back to become a sought after team member. Her next years' appraisal was better and got her an increment. Saira triumphed, because she knew how to learn from criticism.

4. ACCEPT FAILURE AS AN IMPORTANT PART OF LIFE: Shivani was heartbroken when her 15 year old perfect son started doing badly in exams. Her world fell apart when she came to know that he had secured 73% in 10th grade. She felt that she had failed as a parent and her son as she had not devoted enough time to her son as she was a working mother. In counselling, she was asked if she knew any parent who had never failed their kids and were always there for them. Shivani couldn't come up with any names of such mothers who had been perfect to the core. Yes, that's how real mothers are...you will fail sometimes and you will win sometimes. Every moment you are real with your child, you are succeeding as a mother. Accepting failure as a part of life and knowing that you gave it your best shot is good enough. There's magic in feeling genuine regret rather than overkilling guilt and shame. Own your failure openly, publicly, and you'll reap a harvest of forgiveness, trust, respect, and connection—the things you thought you'd get by succeeding. Ironic, isn't it?

5. GO WITH YOUR GUT: When you see a red flag, pay attention. How many times in life have you kicked yourself for not listening to that little voice in your head that says, “Something is wrong here”?. Preetam gave an interview with an organisation, going by their market reputation. Yet during the interview, he picked up feelings of dissonance within the company. After joining them, he realised that his gut was right..the company was going through major shuffle and policy changes, which were not working out for Preetam.

6. BE A PROBLEM SOLVER AND STAY CALM: In a crisis, people tend to get anxious. Maintaining a sense of Zen will not only allow you to think more clearly but will also set the tone for those around you. Kapil used to get tensed over small details. He realised that in the larger scheme of things they were really not that important. He focussed his energies on things that were more important for him to reach his monthly targets. This started calming him down.

7. FIND A SOLUTION: You need to figure out how to address and remedy the situation. Start by considering your end game — what’s the ultimate outcome you’d like to see? — and work backwards from there. Daya wanted to be a good father to his children. He wanted them to remember him as a gentle and loving father. He started working backwards and his daily actions and behaviours showed to his children that Daya was a loving father. He played with them, took them for cricket coaching, went swimming, shared personal success and failures and most of all listened to them when they had to say something.

8. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY OF YOUR MISTAKES AND FAILURES: If you screwed up, don’t make excuses — just apologise genuinely for any errors on your part. Remember, that no one is perfect and it's human to err. Prema was a caring mother. She had many dreams about her daughter and wanted her to do well in studies and be a well behaved child of the family. But when her daughter started showing disinterest in studies and marks started falling, Prema used to beat up her daughter in her anxiety to do well. In counselling Prema understood that her intentions were good, but the way she communicated were not helping the situation as Prema's daughter hated her mother and maintained distance. Prema owned up her mistakes and apologised for her errors to her daughter. She also took remedial action to be accepting of her daughter and gave her the space to make her own mistakes and learn from them. 

9. BECOME PROACTIVE: Don’t let a small mistake linger and turn into a bigger one. That’s not to say you should simply be reactive, but i f you know you did something wrong, deal with it right away. Say, for example, you stuck your foot in your mouth during an important business meeting and inadvertently offended your boss or a client. Acknowledge the gaffe, apologize and try to move on without beating yourself up. Remember that, “In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.

10. DEFINE YOUR OWN SUCCESS AND FAILURES: Its important to have your own definition of both rather than how the world sees and defines success and failure. Find answers to questions like: How would you be behaving when you have succeeded, what must happen to feel successful, how will your life change when you are successful? Every person has a very different view and definition for success and making it your own definition can spell failure. Don't let the world tell you whether you have failed or succeeded. It's also excellent for self esteem and works as a protective shield from potential damage. 

So, next time there’s that misstep, mistake or misunderstanding, remember to take a deep breath and be your own best publicist by remaining calm, seeking the solution and seeing the challenge as an opportunity to lead and learn.









How To Bounce Back From Failure - Tips From A Pyschologist

Grief is a complex emotion that may give you side effects like guilt and make you struggle as you try to get through your everyday life. It is usually caused by some loss in life which may have to do with relationships, work or any other reason like a chronic physical ailment or disability. Complicated grief disorder is a condition where the extreme level of grief impairs a person and how he or she behaves in his or her daily life. It can have a debilitating effect and make a person helpless when it comes to dealing with everyday functions. It may continue for more than six months after the loss, and may even lead to depression and anxiety, among other complications.

Let us cast a glance of how this may be dealt with.

Psychotherapy: Cognitive-behavioral therapy and other forms of therapy can often help people who are suffering from this form of prolonged grief. With this kind of therapy, a patient can actually find an outlet to discuss the various emotions that the bereavement has brought on, and how he or she is not able to cope. The therapist, in this case, is usually a psychiatrist or a psychologist, who can then help in reprogramming the attitude of the patient so as to curb the grief and move on with life by embracing daily functions.
Group Therapy: In many cases, group therapy may also work. It is a natural human tendency to be grateful for what we have when we get to hear of higher and greater adversities. And when we see people suffering from those adversities actually taking steps to get over it, we can also get hugely motivated to do the same with our own lives. This is why group therapy is a powerful mechanism that many doctors and psychiatrists recommend for dealing with complicated grief therapy. This does not even need to be a formal therapy session. It can even be a club or a get together of people who have been through a similar problem.
Medication: In some extreme cases, the patients may be prescribed some antidepressants as well as beta blockers that can put their emotions right until they can deal with them in a better manner. Such medicines also help in numbing that part of the brain so that the patient may function in a more normal manner. Yet, care must be taken that the patient does not get addicted to such kind of medication.
Change of Focus: Travelling or picking up a new hobby can also have a positive effect on the person suffering from this condition. It can help in triggering the production of dormant hormones in a more normal way so that the patient may function in a more normal way, without the debilitating grief.


How To Deal With Complicated Grief Disorder?

Epilepsy is a condition that starts in the brain and causes seizures in which the patient loses consciousness and has convulsions. He also jerks his arms and legs along with trembling and frothing from the mouth.
The lesser known fact about epilepsy is that there are many types of epileptic conditions-over 40 - and similarly, there are numerous drugs available to treat your epileptic disorder and prevent seizures. Your doctor will diagnose your type of epileptic disorder and prepare a treatment plan for it.

Types of epileptic seizures
Epileptic seizures are generally categorized as either partial or primary, generalized depending on where they originate in the brain. Partial seizures are less intense and they start in one section rather than the entire brain. If you have this type of seizure, you will be aware of what s happening to you. The other type of seizure affects a larger part of the brain. Here you may have difficulty understanding what's happening to you. Since these spread to the entire brain, you lose consciousness and start convulsing.

Having a seizure can put you at risk for serious injuries including head injuries.
So, if you close to you suffers from epilepsy, it's critical to your health and well being to educate yourself about your condition and have an action plan in place to tackle the seizures which can happen anywhere, and sometimes with no one to assist you or him actively.

Here is what you can do to manage epilepsy-

Educate yourself: You must know as much as possible about your condition. Know your symptoms and learn to recognize the symptoms preceding a seizure. Also, educate your friends and family about epilepsy so that they can support you during a seizure. Educate your family to do the right things when you have a seizure.
Make a seizure response plan: This plan should list the names and numbers of your doctors and two emergency contacts.
Other things you can do as an epileptic:
Antiepileptic drugs are quite successful in preventing seizures but they should be taken as prescribed. Don t change your dosage before talking to your doctor.
Sleep properly as lack of sleep can trigger seizures.
Exercising regularly can help keep you physically healthy and reduce depression and also help in managing seizures.
Manage your stress levels, limit alcohol and cigarettes.
On the other hand, if your family member or friend has epilepsy, this is what you can do:

Roll the person onto one side during a seizure.
Place something soft under the person s head.
Loosen tie and top buttons.
Don t put an object in an epileptic s mouth. It can hurt his/her teeth.
Don't try to restrain him during a seizure.
Clear away stones and other dangerous objects if the patient is thrashing around.
Time the seizures and be calm during them.
Don t leave the patient alone.

Epileptic Conditions - How To Deal With Them?

Asperger's Syndrome or Asperger's Disorder is a neurotypical condition that affects the development of the child the effects of which continue into adulthood. This condition typically shows up as difficulties faced by the patient when it comes to social interactions as well as other nonverbal means of communication. It should not be confused with autism as the patient has no speech and cognitive development delay. 

Asperger's syndrome can show up as restricted and repetitive patterns in the behaviour of the patient. It lies at the higher end of the autism spectrum and the signs are usually less obvious. Here are a few ways with which you can effectively deal with someone who is suffering from this disorder.

1. Routine: The patient suffering from this condition will need a certain kind of stability as it is very difficult to predict what will happen in the near future or to even plan for it. The best way to tackle this scenario is with the help of a proper routine that can help the patient achieve some kind of control over the situation surrounding him or her so that he or she is better equipped and more capable of handling normal functioning and social situations as well.

2. Information: It is also a good idea to help these patients in looking at and in processing information. While normal people may easily be able to discard insignificant or unimportant information, the brain of the patient suffering from asperger's syndrome does not allow him or her to do so. In many cases, the patient is not able to filter the important and the unimportant information. This can debilitate many functions. So, it is important to be present to help the patient in making decisions and processing information that is actually relevant to his or her functioning.

3. Learning: One of the most crucial things to remember with the Asperger's patient is that they tend to understand and process things when they have a visual presentation rather than being told verbally. So showing them things practically in the proper manner is the right way to help them learn and process situations in a correct way. This will prevent them from doing things in the same old way even when their brains tell them that it will lead to wrong results.

4. Physical Abilities: Poor motor skills as well as lack of proper organisation skills are traits that usually characterise these patients. It is important to make them aware of this during games and activities that require management as well as use of social skills. For example, football and other such activities can be introduced in the routine. This will promote interaction with the team in order to play and enjoy the game.

How to Deal With a Patient Suffering From Asperger's Syndrome?

Language disorder is commonly known as language impairment, it is a common childhood disorder, which makes it difficult for kids to understand what the people around them are saying to them and to face difficulty in following simple directions, it also includes difficulty in expressing the thoughts and feeling through speech.

Language disorder can be classified as:

Receptive language disorder: This disorder makes it difficult to understand what the other person is saying to the one suffering from it.
Expressive language disorder: Kids suffering from it are not able to express themselves and their thoughts.
Mixed receptive expressive disorder: These kids have combined symptoms of receptive language disorder and expressive language disorder, making it difficult to understand and to make someone else understand.
Symptoms of language disorder:

Difficulty in understanding: The ones suffering from language disorder, finds it difficult to understand what the people around them are saying.
Limited vocabulary: It is one of the prominent symptoms, in which the vocabulary of the kids is very limited as compared to other kids of that age.
Trouble learning new things: Learning new things is a difficult task for the kid suffering from language disorder
Repeat usage of certain phrases: Kids tend to use the same phrase again and again, which is one of the basic symptoms.
Frustration: As the kid is either not able to understand or to make other understand or both, kids with this disorder tend to remain more frustrated in comparison to other kids, as they are unable to do things. 
Sentences which do not make sense: Making incomplete or senseless sentences is a key indicator of language disorder.
What you should do?

Speech therapist: The treatment may include speech therapy, in which the speech therapist will work towards building the vocabulary and improving the grammar of the kids suffering, making the kids more confident and feel good about themselves.
Psychotherapy: If the kid is also suffering from emotional issues because of the language disorder, then one should also undergo Psychotherapy, as it not only improves the morale of the patient, but also provides the guidance on how to keep improving further from the language disorder.
Positive Atmosphere: The kids suffering from such a disorder should be made comfortable enough to enjoy their being, giving plenty of time to your young ones is the best way to cure such disorder, so one should always communicate well with his kids and make them learn new things, sing to them, listen to various sounds, show different pictures, colours, shapes to make them learn.
Parental Support: The parents should also understand the issue well, be patient, and should support the kid to work out on the disorder. Parents should also interact with other parents, who have been there, to learn more about the language disorders and how their kids overcome the disorder.
As language disorder is one of common issue in kids, this can be managed and cured well to improve after all the required knowledge and best practices to follow.

Language Disorder - How to Diagnose it?	

Are you aware of the schizophrenia and the adverse effects it inflicts on a person? Schizophrenia is a chronic and extremely severe mental disorder that affects how a person thinks, behaves, and feels. Schizophrenia patients seem like they are not aware of reality. The condition requires lifelong treatment, even after the symptoms leave. There are various types of treatments, which are used for schizophrenic patients. The treatment is usually guided by an experienced psychiatrist. 

The various modes of treatments are as follows:
Medications: Medications are very important for the treatment of schizophrenia, and antipsychotic drugs are most commonly used. They help in managing the symptoms by affecting dopamine. Treatment using antipsychotic drugs aims at managing the symptoms effectively. Antidepressants and anti-anxiety drugs are also used for treatment. Several weeks are required for these medicines to show results. Most of the medications used for schizophrenia treatment are associated with severe side effects and are thus avoided by many people. The patient s cooperation with treatment determines the choice of drug.

First generation antipsychotics: These medicines are associated with adverse neurological side effects, such as the possibility of developing tardive dyskinesia, which is an irreversible movement disorder.
Second generation antipsychotics: These medicines are preferred because of the lower risk of adverse side effects on the body than first generation medicines.
Psychological interventions: When the patient s psychosis decreases, psychological and psychosocial interventions are required. They include the following:

Individual therapy: Psychotherapy is important for normalizing a patient s regular thought patterns. Learning about ways to deal with stress, and identifying warning signs can help patients manage their condition better.
Social skills training: This aims at improving a schizophrenic person s social interactions, communication and his/her ability to take part in daily activities.
Family therapy: Family therapy is important for educating the families of schizophrenic patients about the disorder, and let them know about the ways to deal with it.
Vocational rehabilitation and supported employments: Most people with schizophrenia need some kind of daily living support. Programs are offered by several communities and self-help groups for helping schizophrenic people with housing, jobs, crisis situations. With proper treatment, most schizophrenic people manage to deal with their symptoms and illness.

Hospitalization: During emergency or crisis periods of extreme symptoms, a patient may need to be hospitalized to get proper nutrition, basic hygiene, sufficient sleep, and safety.
Electroconvulsive therapy or ECT is carried out for schizophrenic patients who do not respond to drug treatment. This therapy is also beneficial for patients who have got depression. It is recommended for you to consult a doctor on experiencing any symptom of schizophrenia.


Schizophrenia - Different Modes Of Treatment That Are Followed!

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