Anger is good. It protects you. But intense, uncontrolled anger may destroy valuable relationships. Anger is a result of anxiety and fear. When we assume that our expectations will not be met, we become anxious. When we feel unsure about our own capabilities we become anxious. This anxiety creates fear. Anxiety comes from our beliefs. All beliefs can be modified.

Anger has lots of energy. Avoid arguments/confrontations when you are very angry. When you are very angry you are likely to use rough language which may damage your relations and you are likely to behave impulsively. All this you might regret later on. Following are a few techniques which will help you to manage your anger in difficult situations :

Sit down and have a glass of water, slowly. This will help you to calm down a little.
Avoid or go away from that room or situation. Tell the people concerned, that you are angry and would like to discuss it some other time.
Deep breathing exercises help a lot. Close your eyes, take 10 deep breaths, turn your attention towards your body. See what is happening to your body. Tell your body muscles to relax. If your heart is beating fast, if you are breathing fast, continue deep breathing, till it normalises.
Now understand what is making you angry. Understand your own anxiety and fear related to the issue.
Let the other person know how you are  feeling . Start your statements, I feel hurt/insulted/let down/neglected etc. when you do this , instead of saying  You hurt/neglect me . When you express your feeling in this manner, the other person does not feel blamed, which makes the other person more receptive.
Focus on the current issue, don t bring in past situations.
Tell the other person, what you want or expect, instead of telling what you do not want. E.G. Instead of saying  I don t want you to go out now , say  I would like you to stay at home today .
Listen carefully what the other person wants to tell you. Give others a chance to voice their opinions.
Make an eye contact and be firm but polite while communicating your point of view.
Understand everyone s responsibility in the situation. Try to see, what is your share in the problematic situation? Work on that.
Understand what change you want.
Have realistic expectations from others and also from yourself.

Anger Management - 12 Tips To Help You!

While most of us consume alcohol on a social basis, or during certain special and momentous events of our life, there are some people who may be classified as heavy drinkers. There is a certain alcohol limit as per the sex, age and climate that a person can have on a daily basis. When a person overshoots that limit on a daily basis and that too by a large margin, he or she may be known as a heavy drinker. 

If you fall in this heavy drinking category, then you may want to go through the following tips in order to bring down and curb your habit so that you can drink in moderation, without causing undue problems for your mental and physical health.

Use bitters: Using bitters, especially digestive bitters, with your drinks can help in bringing down the amount of alcohol that you consume in one go. This can also help your body in digesting the alcohol in a better manner so that you do not wake up with a hangover. Also, the use of digestive bitters can help in detoxification of the liver and prevent it from getting coated with toxins released by alcohol.
Water: It is a well-known fact that one must stay hydrated while drinking so that he/she does not get carried away and drink too much. You can easily have a glass of water between each drink so that you keep the buzz at a stable level rather than letting it get to your head, to a point where you start to ask for even more alcohol. Moreover, before a big party or event, it is best to first have plenty of water so that you do not end up going overboard.
Cleansing juices: The latest diet and fitness fad includes a dose of juices churned from various kinds of fruit and vegetables. You can also try this cleansing juice menu every time you feel like reaching out for a drink. This will help you in keeping things in perspective and then drinking moderately, if and when the need arises.
Set a drink deadline: If you want to cut back on your drinks significantly, then one of the best things to do is to set yourself a drink deadline. As per this deadline, you will set a number where you will stop. For instance, once you have reached 2 to 3 drinks, you will automatically stop so that you do not binge.
Find a support group: It is best to find a support group of friends or even an alcoholic anonymous group so that you can share your experiences and find motivation at the same time. This is especially important for those going through withdrawal symptoms.

Are You A Heavy Drinker? 5 Tips to Help You Drink in Moderation!

For years I have been practicing as a psychotherapist in different parts of the world and what I have noticed is that no matter what kind of relationship or marriage a couple are in, when they end up in my office it's always for the same reason: they want to be happier, healthier and more-connected even though the issues can vary - money, sex, infidelity, in-laws, children etc.

Despite this each relationship is completely subjective and no clear cut rules can be executed on it, yet following certain guidelines may help proceeding happily in a relationship.

If you are struggling in your relationship (and if you are reading this article there is a big chance you are unless you are one of my friends..or both) you might find it helpful to follow some of these ideas:

1. Love yourself

You must love yourself before you can love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy. Accepting yourself fully as you are and showing yourself this same unconditional love will provide protection, healing, and confidence to work on your shortcomings.

2. Adopt a positive lifestyle

There are many different ways in which you can embrace a more positive lifestyle - practice affirmations, express gratitude, meditation, exercise... just find something that helps you unwind and enjoy life. And most importantly - keep doing these things repeatedly.

3. Empathize with your partner

The ability to empathize is what inhibits us from just going through life doing whatever we want, without any regard for others. It is what makes compromise in a relationship possible. If I realize that something I've done has hurt you (because I can empathize with your pain or unhappiness) I will hesitate to do that again.

4. Take responsibility: Don't try to figure out who's right

When couples come for therapy, one or both tend to think that the primary problem is their partner. Both people co-create the climate of the relationship. And both need to do some things differently to create the marriage or relationship they both really want. If your intention is to create a more positive world for yourself and those around you, it's up to you to have the thoughts, moods, and actions that will create that world.

5. Stay connected

When there is distress in the marriage or relationship, one or both usually feel some emotional disconnection. Frequently, sexual passion diminishes as well. (However, sometimes one partner will try to increase frequency of sex in an effort to feel connected.). And often, people will busy themselves with work or kids instead, or do other things to either try to feel connected or to avoid being alone with the person with whom they feel the pain of disconnection

6. Express thoughts, feelings, and wishes 

Resentment can build when couples sweep things under the rug, so be vulnerable and don't bury negative feelings, but try to express them in a respectful way.

Opening up to your partner can make you feel vulnerable and exposed, but it is the most important part of an intimate relationship. In Daring Greatly, Dr. Brene Brown defines vulnerability as uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure. Given this definition, the act of loving someone and allowing them to love you may be the ultimate risk. Love is uncertain. It's risky because there are no guarantees and your partner could stop loving you. Exposing your true feelings may mean that you are at a greater risk for being hurt or criticized.

7. Try new things together

Boredom can be a major obstacle to lasting romantic or companionate love.

Psychological research has suggested that couples who experience the most intense love are the ones who enjoy participating in new or challenging 'self-expanding' activities together.

8. Preserve your independence

Dr Perel, in her popular TED talk explains that neediness and caretaking in long-term partnerships - which can easily result from looking to the partnership for safety, security and stability - damper the erotic spark. But if couples can maintain independence and witness each other participating in individual activities at which they're skilled, they can continue to see their partner in an ever-new light.

If after trying the above you are still struggling with your relationship, make sure you go and see a couple therapist.

Two couples talking in one couple's living room...

One says to the other, 'The work being done on your marriage.. are you having it done or are you doing it yourselves?'



8 Tips To Rev Up Your Relationship With Your Partner

Anxiety is something you face a lot due to different reasons. It also leads to mutiple problems, including low confidence, giving you an uneasy or uneasy feeling and more importantly affects your general well being and ability to work. If you feel you suffer from anxiety, here are some ways to reduce it.


	Accept the anxiety: anxiety is only a temporary phase which everyone faces. If you keep worrying and try to fight it, you will become even more anxious and your health will become even worse. The only way to deal with the anxiety mentally is to accept that this is a temporary phase and that it will pass away soon.
	Self-soothing techniques: there are many physiological things for you to do as well which will allow you to relieve anxiety. Diaphragmatic breathing is a very good way to achieve this. Sometimes reassuring yourself is more valuable than you think. Practice saying comforting things to yourself and the stress and anxiety will automatically reduce. Muscle relaxation is yet another method which will allow you to decrease your anxiety.
	Monitor your diet: your diet is crucial in reducing your anxiety as caffeine and alcohol are two of the leading causes of anxiety in your body. However, abruptly stopping your intake of caffeine and alcohol also leads to withdrawal symptoms. Therefore balancing out intake of alcohol and caffeine is crucial.
	Exercise regularly: you probably know that exercise is very important for maintaining good health. However, what you probably do not know is that exercise is perhaps more effective than even medication in relieving your anxiety. Therefore, it is imperative for you to get moving.
	Get adequate sleep: everyone feels bad when they do not sleep enough. However, did you know that lack of sleep is a major cause of anxiety. The more you sleep, the less anxious you will feel.



5 Tips To Reduce Your Anxiety Instantly

The chronic disorder that causes recurrent and unprovoked seizures is referred to as Epilepsy. A seizure is an impulsive and unexpected rush of activity in the brain. The reasons for the cause of epilepsy include head trauma, high fever, low blood sugar, and alcohol withdrawal. It is a neurological disorder and more than 3 million people in the United States have been affected by epilepsy. The chronic disorder is common not only in adults but even in young children and it has been observed that it occurs more in males. The disorder can merely be controlled by the use of various strategies as there is no cure for it till date.

Causes of epilepsy
Any illness that disturbs the usual form of neuron activity can lead to seizures. There are many possible causes of epilepsy. The 2 main types of seizures include partial/focal seizure and generalized seizure. The partial seizure would affect only one part of the brain. It is difficult to identify mild seizures. Further, stronger seizures are known to cause uncontrollable muscle twitches and spasms. At the time of a strong seizure, a patient can lose his consciousness. On the other hand, generalized seizures affect both parts (cerebral hemispheres) of the brain so their onset is not easily identifiable. Types of generalized seizures include tonic-clonic, absence or atonic etc. The other important fact is that epilepsy progresses because of imbalance of neurotransmitters which are nerve-signaling chemicals and also due to an abnormality in the brain wiring.

Drugs used to treat epileptic seizures
Anticonvulsant drugs are mainly used to treat epileptic seizures. The type of treatment provided to patients mainly depends on factors like severity and frequency of the seizures. The other factors that are also taken into consideration for the type of treatment provided include medical history, overall health and the age of a person. A patient can feel better with a seizure medication, an implant that works on the nerves, a special diet, and surgery.
To control epileptic seizures medications are the best option and to treat the brain disorder the right medication needs to be used. There are nearly 20 drugs available that are used for treating different types of epileptic seizures. The doctors provide medication only after proper review of the patient s medical history and their lifestyle. Some of the medications that are made include the use of antiepileptic drugs and anti-seizure drugs. The faulty signaling of the brain is suppressed with these medications.

Important precautions you must take

It is very important that the medication is taken as directed by the doctor. The main reason behind the use of these drugs is that they reduce the number of seizures and there are no side-effects. 
Care should be taken that the drugs provided to the children to treat epilepsy are FDA approved and are safe for use by children. 
The epilepsy drugs that can be taken for partial seizures include carbamazepine, phenytoin, valproic acid, valproate, and brivaracetam.
Natural treatments can also be made use of for epilepsy as at times medications do not work well on some patients. Acupuncture, use of natural herbs and vitamins can also be used for treating the brain disorder.

Epilepsy - Things You Must Take Care Of!

Epilepsy is a disorder of the central nervous system, thus it is basically a neurological disorder. In this the nerve cell activity of the brain is disrupted and causes seizures along with episodes of unusual behavior along with the loss of consciousness. The symptoms of the seizure can vary and some people with epilepsy just stare blankly for few seconds when a seizure takes place, while some twitch their arms and legs repeatedly.

Symptoms of Epilepsy:
As epilepsy is caused by the abnormal activities in the brain cells, seizures affect the processes with which the brain coordinates. Some signs and symptoms are:

Staring blankly
Confusion which is temporary
Uncontrolled jerking movements of the legs and arms
Loss of awareness and consciousness
Psychic symptoms
Mostly the symptoms vary depending on the type of the seizure. The seizures are further classified into focal and generalized depending on which part of the brain shows abnormal activity.
Focal seizures
When seizures are due to the abnormal activity of the cells in just one area then it is known as focal seizures. These seizures are of two types:

Simple partial seizures or the focal seizures without loss of consciousness. These seizures basically alter the emotions and the things like change in smell, look, sound and taste. These also result in the involuntary jerking of the body like the legs and arms, with spontaneous sensory symptoms like the tingling and flashing of the lights.
Complex partial seizures or the focal dyscognitive seizures. These seizures have a loss of awareness and consciousness. One might just stare blankly into space in this seizure and performs repetitive activities like swallowing, chewing, walking in circles and chewing.
Generalized seizures
There are six types of generalized seizures. These are:

Absence seizures, also known as petit mal seizures, are commonly seen in children and are characterized by subtle body movements like lip smacking and eye blinking and staring blankly into space. These also cause loss of consciousness.
Tonic seizures lead to stiffening of the muscles. These affect the muscles of the legs and arms and also cause to fall to the ground.
Atonic seizures are also called as drop seizures. These cause loss of control in the muscles, thereby leading to collapse or fall.
Clonic seizures are the rhythmic and jerking muscle movements. These affect the arms, face and neck.
Myoclonic seizures appear as twitches in the arms and legs.
Tonic-clonic seizures also known as grand mal seizures are very dramatic and lead to body stiffening, abrupt loss of consciousness, shaking and loss of bladder control and tongue biting.

Epilepsy - How Seizures Affect It?

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