Do you have someone who is passive-aggressive in your life? Perhaps your parents, your siblings, your partner or your friends? It can be difficult to handle such a person. When two people, who are having a healthy relationship with each other are angry with each other, they show anger, they say that they are upset, they discuss things and sort things out. There are so many different ways to express anger. But when it comes to a person with passive-aggressive behaviour, it is not going to be the same when they are angry. This is basically a way to express anger indirectly, as they are unable to or uncomfortable to express their feelings and anger openly.

They need help, and it is you who will be able to help them get out of this pain or anger. Here are six steps to changing someone's passive-aggressive behaviour:

When there is an argument going on between both of you or when one of you is angry, do not say something or do something negative. This will make them shut down completely and they will never open up. It may also happen that the situation gets worse. So, take some time and calm down.
Do not go for any guesswork. You are trying to help someone to get over his/her passive-aggressive behaviour. You need to know what they actually feel. So, ask them how they feel and if they have anything to say about it. This can help them open up.
Brainstorming can be one of the best steps. Yes, if you think that you often argue on some common point, then you need to come up with a solution for it first. Ask for their opinion, make a list of all the points and try to make it as detailed as possible.
Check out the pros and cons of your opinions. When you are done with brainstorming, you need to consider each opinion or decision you made in order to make sure that both of you are comfortable with it.
Choose a win-win situation. In other words, pick up those solutions which make both of you happy.
Execute your opinion or plan and evaluate if it is working for you. If plan A does not work for you, then you can still consider the other options that you left behind to draft a plan B.
Communication is very important and when you are able to communicate well, you will be able to get what you actually need. You should start to think that your feelings are valid and learn to enjoy how good it feels when others value your feelings. Open up and talk!

Passive Aggressive Nature - 6 Things You Can Do To Help!

You might think, as a parent, that if you behave strictly then your child will become well-behaved. But research and studies have shown that the opposite happens. Strict parenting leads to children who behave worse than others and they suffer from low self-esteem.

Some other reasons why being strict is harmful:

Never learning self-regulation: Responsibility and self-discipline have to be learned by the children themselves. When you put harsh limits on them, they never learn self-regulation. If they think the limits don t sound too harsh, they will learn to accept them. But the limits placed on them should never be controlling. If this happens, children see themselves as being controlled and no one enjoys being controlled.
Instilling fear: If you are being authoritarian (parenting in which there are high demands and low sympathy) instead of empathetic, then your children will become scared of you. You are instilling the power of fear in them. This triggers a vicious chain of events. When you yell, they will yell as well.
Anger and depression: Authoritarian parenting often leads to children believing a part of them is unacceptable. They feel that their parents would not understand. It makes them susceptible to anger management issues and depression.
Blindly obeying those in power: Children raised up in strict households start thinking power is always right. They learn to obey blindly. This makes them vulnerable to peer pressure. They also never learn to take responsibility for their actions.
Rebelling: Children tend to be angrier and become rebellious when they have strict parents. The need to break free and not conform to the non-empathetic limits that forces them to act out. They might even nurture thoughts about leaving home and running away.
Lying: Strict parenting creates excellent liars. Children learn to lie when they are in trouble. They think lies will placate their parents and they can get away with anything.
Damage to parent-child relationship: If you are strict and you don t change your authoritarian ways, then it damages your relationship with your children. Natural empathy is lacking in strict parents. You don t understand your child, and your child doesn t feel like sharing their lives with you. It creates a divide between the parent and child. Children never quite get over this as they grow older.

Being a Strict Parent Can be Harmful for Your Kids - 7 Reasons Prove it

Anger is good. It protects you. But intense, uncontrolled anger may destroy valuable relationships. Anger is a result of anxiety and fear. When we assume that our expectations will not be met, we become anxious. When we feel unsure about our own capabilities we become anxious. This anxiety creates fear. Anxiety comes from our beliefs. All beliefs can be modified.

Anger has lots of energy. Avoid arguments/confrontations when you are very angry. When you are very angry you are likely to use rough language which may damage your relations and you are likely to behave impulsively. All this you might regret later on. Following are a few techniques which will help you to manage your anger in difficult situations :

Sit down and have a glass of water, slowly. This will help you to calm down a little.
Avoid or go away from that room or situation. Tell the people concerned, that you are angry and would like to discuss it some other time.
Deep breathing exercises help a lot. Close your eyes, take 10 deep breaths, turn your attention towards your body. See what is happening to your body. Tell your body muscles to relax. If your heart is beating fast, if you are breathing fast, continue deep breathing, till it normalises.
Now understand what is making you angry. Understand your own anxiety and fear related to the issue.
Let the other person know how you are  feeling . Start your statements, I feel hurt/insulted/let down/neglected etc. when you do this , instead of saying  You hurt/neglect me . When you express your feeling in this manner, the other person does not feel blamed, which makes the other person more receptive.
Focus on the current issue, don t bring in past situations.
Tell the other person, what you want or expect, instead of telling what you do not want. E.G. Instead of saying  I don t want you to go out now , say  I would like you to stay at home today .
Listen carefully what the other person wants to tell you. Give others a chance to voice their opinions.
Make an eye contact and be firm but polite while communicating your point of view.
Understand everyone s responsibility in the situation. Try to see, what is your share in the problematic situation? Work on that.
Understand what change you want.
Have realistic expectations from others and also from yourself.

Anger Management - 12 Tips To Help You!

Many of us feel anger, frustration and dissatisfaction in our daily lives. While medicine and therapy can help extreme cases, there are other ways to bring down the symptoms with a proper daily routine, diet and exercise. Exercise can be an incredible treatment to discharge those sentiments. In case you wind up getting angry regularly, yoga can help you to deal with the problem while you are away or at home. Yoga can help with both managing anger and calming you down when you feel particularly furious at any given point. Some of the asanas or postures that help in doing so are as follows:

Savasana (cadaver posture): With the cadaver posture, you lie on your back with your palms up and arms next to you. At that point, you relax every part of your body. While practicing this posture, concentrate on relaxing. Inhale deeply into your tummy. It is best to shut your eyes while doing so.
Sheetali Pranayama (cooling breath): The cooling breathing exercise is a phenomenal approach to address anger. You basically roll your tongue (twisting in the edges) or press your lips together. In case you cannot roll your tongue, breathe in gradually through your mouth so that the air gets in through your tongue. At that point, close your mouth and breathe out through your nose. This practice is believed to lessen the anger and enhance peace of mind.
Ardha matsyendrasana (half spinal twist pose): This posture strengthens the organs and relaxes your spine. You can perform this exercise by sitting with both legs in front of you, and then by folding one knee up while folding the other on the ground underneath the other leg. You then turn your spine toward the side where the knee is up and use the knee as a rest for your arm as you stretch into the stance. Try not to exhaust yourself. In case you feel pain, relax a bit.
Urdhva dhanurasana (upward bow pose): This stance has been efficient in increasing trust between people with threatening or serious identity issues, and decreases anger. While there are a few approaches to accomplish a back curve in yoga, the upward bow stance is the most widely recognized due to the back twists that lead to better circulation of energy.
Salamba sarvangasana (shoulder stand): It can balance out the nervous system. People who deal with anger issues or who have an antagonistic identity will find that this asana helps in lessening their outrage and anger. It creates quality and adaptability and helps the thyroid and parathyroid organs as well.
Doing yoga frequently will go far towards helping you deal with your anger in the long haul. In case you have an identity issue, exercising consistently will strengthen the mind. However, you might need to go to a class keeping in mind the end goal, which is to manage the anger.

Anger Management - 5 Yoga Asanas That Can Help You!

Anger is a type of feeling whereas aggression is a type of behaviour. However, the two are frequently confused with each other. At different times individuals use their anger as a reason to act in an aggressive way. Here are a few differences between anger and aggression:

Anger is an acceptable feeling simply like bliss or sadness. Everybody feels angry once in a while. However, numerous individuals deny that they ever feel angry. For others, they have a tendency to wind up being angry to conceal different sentiments and emotions, for example, hurt and sadness. Angry sentiments can discharge endorphins, which are very powerful chemicals inside the body. This rush of energy can help individuals to alleviate themselves from feeling sad or hurt. Nonetheless, covering these very basic and fundamental feelings with anger is not a sound and healthy coping mechanism. Feeling angry is all right, however, the practice that people show when they feel angry may fall into the category of aggression. Anger is a very normal and typical feeling.

Aggression, on the other hand, is a decision. Just because you feel angry and furious does not give you the authorization to treat others poorly. Forceful practices tend to scare the other individual into doing something whether they need to or not. At the point when individuals carry on forcefully, they do not recognise the other individual's sentiments or necessities. Rather, they want the other individual to give in. There are a bunch of approaches to carry on aggressively and it might turn out to be physically injurious. Verbal types of aggression involve making threats or demands. It might incorporate verbally abusing or putting the other individual down. Physical types of aggression may incorporate tossing things, breaking things, hammering things, or physical assaults.

Aggressive conduct can be separated into different classes. These include instrumental aggression and receptive aggression. Instrumental aggression is objective guided aggression in which harm to another is not the essential objective, despite the fact that it can be an optional consequence of the activity. Another sort of aggression is called responsive aggression. Once in a while, it is referred to as hostile aggression. Responsive aggression is conduct that has harm as its primary and in some cases secondary objective. As a rule, this activity is because of an apparent unfairness, insult, or wrongdoing.

Anger is an impermanent emotional state brought on by disappointment and frustration. Aggression, on the other hand, is a regular attempt to hurt a person or to destroy property. In evaluating the conduct, try to make out the difference between anger and aggression that demonstrates emotional issues so as to lead a more normal and well-adjusted life. One can also take the help of anger management or therapy for better evaluation of the source of anger and its surrounding feelings. 

How to Differentiate Between Anger and Aggression?

Becoming a parent is one of the greatest joys in life. It is a magical feeling to hold your child in your arms for the first time. However, as your child grows up, you will notice certain behavioural changes that can be difficult to control or withstand. Temper tantrums are common in children. A child uses tantrums to vent frustration and anger, which he/she feels toward a person or a situation.

While such temper tantrums may lead you to lose your temper, remember that children do not have the same emotional maturity as that of an adult. Therefore, rather than being strict to your child, here are some ways to deal with temper tantrums.

1. Don t try to calm your child: Temper tantrums are often attention seeking in nature. Therefore, you will make it worse if you try too hard to calm your child while he/she is throwing such a tantrum. Instead, choose to ignore the behaviour and go about doing your job. However, keep an eye out to check that your child does not do anything to harm himself/herself or others during this time. You should also verbally clarify that such behaviour is not acceptable.

2. Speak softly but with resolve: Many parents seem to think that shouting at their kids helps against temper tantrums. It does not. In fact, the more your child shouts, the more softly you should interact with them. When you shout you give your child the opportunity to shout - they do this so that they can be heard. Instead, be stern. Sometimes offering a choice can help your child feel as if he/she is in control of the situation.

3. Empathize with your child: Seeing the world from your toddler s perspective is no easy task. This is why parents often think that a temper tantrum is meaningless. However, in most cases, a child s temper tantrum is rooted in the inability to perform a task or articulate his/her wishes. As a parent, you need to devise alternate forms of communication with your child, so that he/she can express feelings better.

4. Give them some space: Rather than scolding your child for throwing a tantrum, let him/her express their frustration. This is similar to the concept of adults venting undesirable feelings. However, tell your kids to express frustration in a non-destructive way. This approach helps your child become emotionally stronger, as they learn to deal with sadness and anger in their own way, without requiring support from elders.

You need to understand that all children throw temper tantrums at one time or another. How you handle the situation determines how your child will deal with frustration and sorrow in later parts of their life.

Parenting Tips To Tackle Temper Tantrums In Children!

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