How much sex should you really have?

Sex is an extremely personal and subjective matter. Different individuals relate to and indulge in sex differently. The idea of sex also varies from person to person and may not always fit the stereotypical penile-vaginal penetrative intercourse.

There is no way of determining exactly how much sex is good and how much of it is too much. Some people like to be sexually active with thorough regularity while others find comfort in abstinence. Age also plays an important role here with people between the ages of 18-29 indulging in higher levels of sexual activity than those who are middle-aged or elderly.

The different levels and frequencies of sexual activity have varying degrees of impacts on the overall mental, physical and sexual health of a person. There are numerous health benefits attached to having an active sex life, which manifests themselves in both the body and the mind.

The health benefits of having sex are - 
As per studies conducted, it has been shown that having sex, at least, two times a week can boost overall physical and mental health. The many health benefits of being sexually active are as follows:
   It improves immunity and makes the body more resilient to diseases
   It improves bladder control in women and prevents urinary incontinence
   It prevents erectile dysfunction in men
   It improves blood circulation and lowers blood pressure
   It acts as a stress reliever
   It improves functioning of the heart and lowers the risk of heart disease
   It reduces sensitivity to pain
There are several other benefits of sex, which include the effective healing and nurturing of the body in a holistic manner.

Is there a limit to having sex?
A large number of people all around the world are concerned about their carnal compulsions and frequently approach sex therapists about what frequency of sex constitutes as a 'healthy' dose.

There really is no such thing as too much sex. But if overindulgence in sexual activities causes a disturbance in everyday activities such as work, classes, household responsibilities and other obligations, it becomes a problem. If such a situation arises, it might be signs of a sex addiction in which case it is important to consult a sexologist or sex therapist. Ideally, having sex two times a day is good for your body, mind and soul.



How much sex should you really have?

Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) are the infections that spread primarily from unprotected sexual intercourse or any kind of sexual contact. Men, like women, are equally prone to contracting STDs on having unprotected sexual intercourse; anal, vaginal or oral. Having multiple sex partners just increases the risks of it. So, you need to consult a specialist sexologist if anything these sort of things happening to you:

Common STD Symptoms in Men

Blisters on or around penis 

Spots, bumps or lesions on the penis 

Discharge (clear, white, or yellow) 

Oozing from the tip of the penis (thick or thin) 

Painful urination 

Painful ejaculation 

Itching on the tip of the penis 

Rash on the penis, testicles, or groin

Here is a list of STDs for men

Chlamydia- Chlamydia is a type of bacterial STD transmitted during oral, anal or vaginal sex with an already infected person. Some of the symptoms of Chlamydia in men are swollen testicles, penile discharge or pain while urinating.

Gonorrhea- This is another bacterial infection, majorly affecting the urethra, anus or the throat and primarily spreads through vaginal, oral or anal sex with someone already suffering from it. The symptoms are quite similar to those of Chlamydia.

Hepatitis B- Hepatitis B Virus (HBV) is the cause of the disease Hepatitis B and can cause severe inflammation of the liver. It spreads from one person to the other on coming into contact with the bodily fluids or blood of the person affected. Few signs of Hepatitis B include jaundice, vomiting, nausea, body aches, mild fever, lethargy and appetite loss.

Herpes (Simplex) - It is a viral infection caused by the herpes simplex virus (HSV) and generally tends to develop on or near to the mouth and the genitals. Primarily, herpes spreads through direct contact with the genitals or mouth of a person already diagnosed with the same.

Syphilis- Another bacterial Sexually Transmitted Disease, unprotected oral, vaginal and anal sex are the primary carriers of this disease. It is considered to be one of the most serious STDs because the risks of contracting HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus) get magnified once infected with Syphilis.

Human Papillomavirus (HPV) - In men, HPV is capable of causing cancers in the throat, anus or the penis. It is either passed on through skin-to-skin or unprotected sexual contact with an infected partner.

Preventing STDs

Many people can be infected with an STD without experiencing any visible symptoms. This means that practicing safe sex is crucial if you want to prevent STD infection.

The only way to completely prevent an STD is abstinence from any type of sexual contact or contact with open sores and bodily fluids of an infected person. But there are other ways to prevent STDs too.

Condoms during intercourse and dental dams or barriers during oral sex are proven effective when used correctly. Refraining from sex with multiple partners and instead opting for a monogamous sexual relationship can also help to prevent STDs. To understand it better and get treated you can always consult a sexologist.

Common STDs in Men

Your good intention during intercourse might be to give your partner an intense orgasm, but orgasms aren t something one can  give . All you can do is make the conditions more favorable for the other person to have them by manipulating your moves. 

Here are six ways in which you can orgasm better: 

Don t skip the foreplay: Just like it is not a good idea to run a marathon without sufficient warm up, it isn t advisable to skip or shorten the foreplay. Explore and find out and choose the right kinds of foreplay that take the arousal to great heights. Oral sex, clitoral stimulation and self-stimulation during sex are incredible in achieving a better climax. 
Experiment with edging: Try what we call 'edging'. That is, bring yourself close to climax, then stop short of reaching climax, and after a pause a few seconds, rebuild your arousal   again just close to climax. Repeat this until you can't hold any more and then come! The resulting orgasm is very intense and worth the effort. 
Try sex toys: Once in a while let a sex toy join the fun. Sex toys are useful in maximizing the pleasure levels during intercourse or solo. 
Use a lubricant: Don t think that a lube just addresses the vaginal dryness and painful intercourse. Research shows that as many as 50% women get better orgasms when they use lubricants. The lubrication adds sensitivity to the genitals and helps get good orgasms. 
Target the C-spot: A lot of women have problems in getting orgasms during intercourse as the clitoris isn t stimulated enough. The clitoris has the maximum number of nerve endings and during intercourse, clitoral contact is needed for most women to reach orgasm. Tip: Try out woman-on top, side-to-side and doggy style positions for clitoral stimulation. There are many more options too. 
Do not overlook the testes: Stroking your sack upwards right before getting an orgasm adds more power to the orgasms in men. The testes are tremendous pleasure points for a man and gently stroking them is useful in heightening the arousal which leads to a stronger orgasm.

6 Ways To Orgasm Better

Knowing premature ejaculation - part 3: management and techniques (non-medical methods)

As shared in part 1and 2 of this series, because of premature ejaculation (pe), both the partners may end up experiencing highly unsatisfactory sex. In fact, it can increase anxiety, which may deteriorate the problem. 
Remember there is not a single magical drug or medicine in the chemist shop which can solve your problem overnight especially if you have chronic pe. Before seeking any medical treatment for pe, it is appropriate to consider the varied options for solving this issue. These include counseling with a sexual therapist, non- medical treatments like various exercises/ techniques and medical treatments including both modern and alternative medicine.

A. Counseling from an expert - sexual therapist or sexual medicine practitioner:
It is well understood that sex is in the mind. However, repeated pe/ failures can lead to lot of stress and disappointments. Anxiety due to pe itself is a big issue and can lead to recurrence of pe.
Reassurance from sexual therapist / counselor that pe is not a disease and can be easily treatable is relaxing for men who are facing this problem. So please share your detailed history and sexual habits with the expert. This may help the expert to guide you well.

B. Behavioral changes:

Some basic things may also help you to deal with the problem. 

1. Some men attempt to treat themselves for premature ejaculation by distracting themselves by thinking nonsexual thoughts (such as naming cricket players and records) to avoid getting excited too fast when approaching their partners. This helps them to focus their attention away from the sexual stimulation.

2. It is also suggested to men that they should relieve themselves of the sexual tension by ejaculating with self masturbation 1-2 hours before attempting sexual intercourse with their partner.

3. Using condoms is known to help in premature ejaculation in some men by decreasing sensation.

4. Women on top position usually helps to delay orgasm in men

 
C. Exercises &amp; techniques:

There are several exercise and techniques you can try sitting in your home.

1. The" stop and start" method:
This technique involves sexually stimulating the man by self until he feels like he is about to reach orgasm. Then he needs to stop the stimulation for about 20-30 seconds and then start it again. Repeat this pattern until the man wants to ejaculate. This can be continued for 10-15 minutes. At the end of say, 10th or 15th minute, continue stimulation until the man reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
2. The" squeeze" method:
 This technique involves sexually stimulating the man by self or by his partner until he recognizes that he is about to ejaculate. At that point, the man or his partner gently squeezes the end of the penis (where the glans penis meets the shaft) for at least 15 seconds. Stop sexual stimulation for about 60 seconds, and then start it again. The person or couple may repeat this pattern for at least 10-15 minutes. At the end of say, 10th or 15th minute, continue stimulation until the man reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
3. Practice breathing exercises 

Deep breathing can greatly help in controlling the arousal and tension that cause early ejaculation. Men must avoid shallow breathing as it can trigger premature ejaculation. Instead, what you should do is spend 5 seconds taking in a long deep breath; then hold it for 3 seconds and then exhale for the next 5 seconds. If you can do this for 5 minutes in the bedroom without pause then you can control premature ejaculation.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on'consult.

Knowing Premature Ejaculation - PART 3: Management and Techniques (Non-medical methods)

It is common for women to experience genital irritation and itching. At some point in time, every woman is likely to experience some form of vaginal irritation. It is a condition that often causes great distress and embarrassment.

Vaginal irritation is commonly caused by a yeast infection. Irritation may also occur due to certain chemicals and sanitary pads, which are used during menstruation. Persistence of such irritation and itching may cause vaginal pain.

Best Remedies to Treat Vaginal Irritation Problem
Vaginal irritation can be managed in several ways. Here are some tips on how to manage and control vaginal irritation using simple remedies:

Use apple cider vinegar: Apple cider vinegar contains antibacterial and antifungal properties. It helps in the removal of irritation completely when caused by a bacterial or fungal infection. Take two spoonfuls of apple cider vinegar, add hot water to it and wash your vagina using this water. The vagina is made acidic due to which the bacteria does not last long.

Apply a cold compress: Vaginal irritation during the night can be quite troublesome and is likely to hamper your sleep, leaving you fatigued. Apply a cold compress or ice cubes directly to the vagina. This will provide substantial relief to the vaginal irritation.

Take a salt bath: Salt is effective in eliminating bacteria and itching. In case you suffer from itching,  wash your vagina using concentrated saltwater. This will provide instant relief from the vagina irritation and the risk of further bacterial growth gets reduced.



Use garlic paste: Garlic contains antibacterial properties, which are quite effective in providing relief from irritation and itching symptoms in the vagina. The smell of garlic is also considered effective. Make a garlic paste and apply it inside your vagina.

Use yogurt: Yogurt contains active cultures, which remove bad bacteria by the addition of abundant good bacteria. Have a cup of pure yogurt without sugar regularly. Yogurt takes care of yeast infections quite fast. You may also apply it to the vagina, especially in the area prone to irritation.

Use basil leaves: Basil leaves contain antifungal, antimicrobial, and antibacterial properties. Boil basil leaves in water and drinks the water. This method eliminates bacteria, which causes vaginal irritation.

Antibacterial talc for vaginal infection: You can use any antibacterial talc of either medical or herbal variety. Herbal, homeopathic talc is mild on the body but takes some time to heal the vaginal infection. Medicated talcs provide faster healing. The talc destroys bacterial and fungal infections, which may occur because of the moist surroundings.

Keep it dry: Keep your vagina dry as bacterial and fungal infections commonly affect wet areas, which results in irritation. For the prevention of vaginal irritation, always wear loose clothes. If the irritation gets out of control, you must consult a doctor.

Update From Lybrate: Due to stress and hectic lifestyle, sexual bliss has become a dream for many. To keep your sex life alive and kicking, buy these Sexual Wellness Products from Lybrate's GoodKart.

8 Effective Ways to Manage Vaginal Irritation Condition

Don't Panic !

Having unprotected sex isn't the smartest move a person can make, but it isn't necessarily the end of the world, so follow the advice below and you should be fine.

We Had Unprotected Sex And...I Think I'm Pregnant

Finding out you're pregnant can be the happiest or the scariest day of your life.

Don't wait around and bury your head in the sand saying 'it won't happen to me' and 'I'll be fine' you might not be, and then you'll find yourself in a much more difficult situation than if you'd faced the situation head on and quickly.

If the intercourse happened less than 72 hours ago, emergency contraception, the morning-after pill, can be taken as a precaution against you becoming pregnant. However, note that the sooner you take the emergency contraceptive pill, the higher its efficiency is.

We Had Unprotected Sex And...I Think I Have an STI

Check for any unusual symptoms around your genitals (vagina or penis), such as:

Pain when you urinate
Itching
An unusual or smelly discharge
Sores
Unexplained bleeding
If any consult your healthcare provider immediately

Not all STIs have visible symptoms so even if you think you're fine, after having unprotected sex, get tested!

Go For Sexually Transmitted Disease Profile Including HIV ( 1ST Month HIV RNA, 3RD MONTH HIV ELISA), HSV 1 and 2, HbsAg, HCV, Urine Routine, VDRL, etc.

We Had Unprotected Sex And...I Think I May Get HIV

Take Post Exposure Prophylactic Drugs (Anti - HIV) as soon as possible. It works when started within 72 hours and must be continued for 1 month to prevent HIV.



What If You Have Unprotected Sex?

Get in touch with a top Sexologist online and consult with Lybrate's doctors today.


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