- Make sure you go to the bathroom a couple of hours before, then shower and clean yourself well. You can use an enema if you are totally paranoid, but if you prepare as I mention here, that's probably overkill.
- Have him slowly work a lubricated finger into you. I said SLOWLY. Get used to having something in there, moving around and such. When YOU are ready, have him use a second finger. Go as slow as you need to in order to be comfortable. If you get to the point where he can move his fingers around a bit without any discomfort, and hopefully with a bit of pleasure, then he can try his penis.
- He needs to agree, and be absolutely clear, that if you tell him to stop, he will STOP moving immediately, and if you tell him to pull out, he will pull out immediately. YOU control
the show here.
For most girls, the first time, even done right, is such a new sensation that it's hard for the girl to know what to think. If you followed my steps and went slowly, there shouldn't be much if any pain
, but the sensation will still be new and different, and you might need some time to get used to it. Usually, by the second or third time, the girl starts to enjoy it (she grows used to the sensation, and isn't as stressed about it, and so can start to enjoy it), and then, she will usually ask for it from time to time when she's in the mood.
Trust with your partner is KEY. You must be able to trust him that he will follow your instructions, including stopping and pulling out if you tell him to. If you can trust him, you'll be able to relax, and that makes a HUGE difference in how you will find the experience.
Make sure he knows that this is NOT like p*rn; he can't just ram it in you and have you love it. He's got to work at it too, and make some sacrifices of his own in the beginning.
Hope this all is enough for understanding hygiene.