Dr. A. Kumar

May it be marriage or a relationship, things could go downhill in due course of time. The reason behind such a situation could be any; while mental compatibility could turn things sour, physical compatibility constitutes a significant part too. Identifying the problem is of utmost importance. Shying away from sexual dissatisfaction hampers the individual lives of both partners. Therefore, couples should take an initiative to talk about it and take a step further to remedy the problem. It has often been seen that a person’s sex life can get boring due to an imminent lack of variety. Adding a zing to your usual sex life can be made possible through bedroom role playing.

Go through the following tips for trying out bedroom role play:

1. Bathe each other and do it in flow: Walking into the bath together can add fervor to a dull and drab sex life. While partners bathe each other, they come to know of a different side of their lover. This binds two individuals better. Intercourse in the shower has proved to be enjoyable for many people. It can also be seen as another way of taking care of your dear one.
2. Try out the royalty - servant trope: Playing the role of a different person altogether can make you enjoy intercourse even more. The man could play the role of a king or a senior courtier while the woman plays the role of a maid servant. Or, it could be just the opposite where the man servant is obliged to have sex with the queen or with any of her companions.
3. The age old idea of being the doctor while she is the nurse: The doctor nurse duo is a great way to add thrill to your relationship. The more imaginative a couple can get, the more satisfaction they derive. To make role playing more convincing, you must try using relevant dialogues.
4. Aunty and the innocent young boy fantasy: The woman could play the dominatrix by being an experienced aunty who holds the reign to her fantasy. Sex proceeds as she instructs the innocent young boy about how to go about with things.
5. Directly reverse the general roles you both play: The roles each of you is accustomed to play in bed could be directly reversed to humor and excite both the partners. So, if the woman is generally under, she should go on top and initiate sex.

Type-2 diabetes and erectile dysfunction may appear as different ailments but they do have a connection. Reports suggest men suffering from Type-2 diabetes are likely to experience Erectile Dysfunction. Moreover, diabetic people suffer from Erectile Dysfunction 10 to 15 years earlier than others.

Reason

The reason behind the connection between the two ailments is quite complex. The whole scenario involves deterioration in nerves, muscle functioning and blood vessels. For successful penetration of penis, body requires healthy functioning of blood vessels, nerves, hormones and sexual desire. Type-2 diabetes hamper the proper functioning of these blood vessels and nerves, thus posing a potential threat to a successful sexual intercourse. Diabetes becomes a big obstacle in obtaining a firm erection. Also, non-regulated flow of blood through these blood vessels adds up to the problem.

Factors Contributing to Erectile Dysfunction due to Diabetes-

Complexities due to Type-2 diabetes increases exponentially when aided with following risk factors-

• Obesity
• Unbalanced diet
• Non-regulated Blood Supply
• Excessive smoking and drinking
• Excessive stress and hypertension
• Lack of Physical activity
• Blood Pressure
• Side effects of medication taken to cure ED

Remedy : Given below are few suggestions which, if followed, can bring your sex life back on track.

• Consult Doctor: It is better to open up about your sexual concerns and consult a doctor. Hesitating in doing so will only increase your problem. Proper knowledge regarding all your existing ailments will allow him to diagnose properly and help you to regulate your blood sugar level. You may further consult a sexologist for specialized treatment for Erectile Dysfunction. Through prescribed medicines and some therapies, this issue can be dealt smoothly.
• Practice a healthy lifestyle: Stay fit. Reduce your extra weight. Include exercise and meditation in your daily routine. This will help a lot in improving your emotional health. In many cases psychological pressure also contribute in causing impotence. So, try to perform some stress releasing exercises to curb down this psychological factor.
• Avoid drinking and smoking: Smoking diminishes the quantity of required nitric oxide which in turn lowers down the blood flow to penis. This increases chances of Erectile Dysfunction to a greater extent. Excessive drinking destroys your blood vessels, thereby posing a serious threat to your sex life.
• Take a proper diet: A balanced diet pays a major role in checking and controlling the blood sugar level. This step will definitely decrease the harm done to your blood vessels and nerves.
• Proper Sleep: Get enough sleep and keep yourself astray from the harmful effects of fatigue.
• Talk with your partner: It is necessary that you discuss freely regarding your sexual problems with your partner. This will help you in gaining confidence, release stress and perform better.

Follow the above suggestions and choose a healthy lifestyle for a safe and pleasing sex life. 

Discrepancy in desire between partners is the most common type of issue that becomes the first reason for an unhealthy sex life. Generally with females the same could be because of four reasons as follows:

• Fatigue or Stress
• Physical Issue
• A Severe Lifestyle Change
• Financial Stress

Though as per the experts the sexual drive is a result of how attracted you find yourself towards your partner.

Here are top 5 reasons why your sex life can be disturbed:

• Having “No time for Sex”: The biggest reason behind a hampered sex life could be having no time for sex. Generally people with busy lives claim that they love each other a lot, on the other hand they do accept they hardly get time to get intimate. Actually the reason behind the same is the lack of desire because of mental stress which they undergo for the whole day. Other than that erectile dysfunction, painful intercourse, negative body image, premature ejaculation and interpersonal conflict could be some of the other reasons which can create issues. The solution for the same is to confront the situation and discuss the problem openly with your partner.
• Medical Illness: One of the most common problems is low desire. But there are many ways to approach the problem. This is exceptionally disappointing for the two patients and clinicians on the grounds that there is no 'little blue pill' for want. The issue of low want regularly sits comfortable crossing point between brain, body and relationship, and this isn't generally simple to hear in our convenient solution culture.  In my opinion one should definitely sit back and let the body undergo the repairing part all by itself.
• Erectile Difficulty: The most common sexual issue that generally people face is erectile difficulty. In the event that there is no restorative premise or commitment to the erectile trouble, for the most part uneasiness is meddling with the man's ability to end up and stay excited. On the off chance that the man is in a conferred relationship, treatment for this as a rule includes having the man and his accomplice complete a graduated arrangement of touching activities, which are intended to help men physically interface with their accomplices with no strain to perform sexually.
• Decreased sex-drive: The most serious issue which a couple can confront is either troubled with the decreased sex-drive in their sexual recurrence or the way that they have ceased all sexual movement. The arrangement isn't a one-assess fits-all model, in light of the way that there are different reasons that couples pertain from taking part in sexual relations can be erectile brokenness, severe pain in the midst of intercourse, weakness with the sexual timetable, loss of orgasm on account of sickness, pharmaceuticals or stress in the relationship. 
• Lack of Emotional Intimacy: Sex is not at all centered to have intercourse rather; the main factor which drives sex is love and intimacy. People generally don’t know how to make love to each other. There had been many chances wherein the partners are too quick to enjoy the feeling of intercourse, and sometimes it becomes so slow that one actually gets irritated because of the same. In both the cases the solution is to get attached to the emotional sensitivity of your partner. In certain cases Dr.s do advise such couples to undergo certain sexual touch exercises which help them perform better between the sheets.

Do you know about the different types of sexually transmitted diseases and how they are caused? STDs are caused mostly by bacterial infections. The bacteria get transmitted while having sex, in the case of most common STDs. There are several STDs which commonly occur in people, primarily because of having unprotected sex.

Causes:

There are various forms of infections, including bacteria like gonorrhea and syphilis, viral STDs like HIV, genital herpes, hepatitis B, and genital warts. The germs which lead to the STDs dwell in the semen, vaginal secretions, and saliva. The transmission mostly occurs through vaginal, anal, and oral contact. Certain STDs are caused due to skin contact.

Types of STDs:

The most common STD diseases are as follows:

1. Chlamydia- This bacterial infection occurs in your genital tract, and it is difficult to diagnose as no early symptoms are always experienced. The disease strikes three weeks after the exposure to the responsible bacteria. Lower abdominal pain and vaginal discharge are indicated as symptoms.

2. Gonorrhea- This is a bacterial infection, which affects the genital tract. It can also develop in your eyes, mouth, throat, and anus. The symptoms start appearing within ten days of the exposure. Major symptoms include thick, bloody discharge from the penis or vagina. Painful sensation while urinating is also indicated.

3. Trichomoniasis- This STD occurs from a microscopic, single-celled parasite called trichomonas vaginitis. It is commonly transmitted during sexual intercourse with an affected individual. In the case of men, the disease infects the urinary tract, without showing any symptoms in many cases. In women, the vagina is affected. The condition appears twenty-eight days within exposure. Mild irritation and severe inflammation are common symptoms. A clear white, greenish or yellowish vaginal discharge is likely in women, while discharge from the penis occurs in the case of men.

4. HIV- HIV occurs because of the human immunodeficiency virus. HIV is a severe health disease which disrupts your body’s immune system, or your body’s ability to fight fungi and bacteria that lead to illness. HIV results in AIDS, which is a chronic, life-threatening condition. Commonly, early stage symptoms are not experienced in case of HIV. An illness which is similar to flu within two to six weeks of infection is likely to occur in some patients. You need to take a screening test for HIV for the diagnosis of this condition.

Another common STD which occurs is genital herpes. This is caused due to a certain form of the HSV or herpes simplex virus. The virus enters your body through tiny breaks in your skin membrane or mucous.

One of the most common reasons of erectile dysfunction is obesity, which might sink your intimate life to a great extent. It is really crucial that you are in control of your weight and regain your libido.
One of the most common chronic conditions that men face is that of erectile dysfunction (ED). Statistically, over 18 million men above the age of 20 experience it to some degree. It is an inability to achieve or maintain erection required for desired sexual activity. Though there might be various reasons for it, there is a consistent connection between obesity and sexual dysfunction. It has been found that obese men are prone to ED 2.5 times more than those of normal weight. These symptoms of ED and various other health issues can be observed if you are just 30 pounds overweight!

Causes 

1. Obesity causes atherosclerosis, which is a cardiovascular condition. In this condition, cholesterol is deposited on the walls of blood vessels, thus restraining blood flow to the organs in the body including the penis.
2. The testosterone level in obese men is low. Due to absence of this sexually-stimulating hormone, there is an inability to achieve erections as testosterone is needed to increase the level of nitric oxide in penile tissue, which acts as a blood vessel dilator.
3. In most cases, erectile dysfunction is considered as the first sign of a weak heart in men who are overweight.

Symptoms

1. Men might experience a low libido, because of the reduced testosterone levels.
2. They might experience a depressed mood and lowering in their levels of energy.
3. They might experience a diminished sense of vitality.

Therapy
It’s really crucial to shed that extra weight if you want to regain your sex life. It has been found by researchers at the Center for Obesity Management in Naples, Italy that one third of obese men have improved sexual activity after they lost weight.

1. Lose weight. Check on how much you eat in a day. Aim at losing 1 to 2 pounds a week, which equals to losing around 500 to 1000 calories in a day.
2. Look out for what you eat in a day. Avoid chips and dips, and become friends with greens and other raw vegetables as your snack. Stop eating the processed and red meats; replace them with fish instead. Switch to whole grains.
3. Physical activity is the most important aspect when it comes to losing weight. Implement a successful weight-loss strategy. Take out some time by skipping a few episodes of your TV show, get up from the couch, and get active for around 30-45 minutes in a day. Repeat this 3-5 times in a week.
4. Lastly, maintain these habits until you don’t shed those extra pounds that are a hindrance to your sex life.

Are you experiencing a low libido or reduced sex drive lately? This is referred to as frigidity. The lack of sexual desire can arise from various psychological issues which need to be addressed. In some cases, a woman may experience low libido, refuses to have sex, and avoids sexual intimacy. In other cases, she may face difficulties in getting aroused or may experience pain or discomfort during sex. Frigidity can occur from both emotional, and physical issues, which cause great strain and distress to a woman’s relationships.

Diagnosis

If the lack of sexual desire, or frigidity becomes a major problem in your relationship, you can opt for various treatment options, depending on the underlying cause of frigidity, and the symptoms experienced.

Communication problems between a woman and her partner is a common reason which leads to frigidity in women. In a case of emotional problems, you should open up, or consult a psychologist for counselling.

Physical problems also cause frigidity and low libido in women. For this, you need to talk to a gynaecologist, or a general practitioner.

Causes

Sexuality involves several complex emotions and behaviour patterns, starting from romance, the feeling of intimacy, security to the feelings of desire and sensuality. There is no switch for intimacy which can be turned on when a partner wants to have sex. The situation or scenario has to feel right and comfortable before mutual enjoyment can be achieved.

Cures for Frigidity

Here are some effective ways of curing frigidity:

1. Counselling of both the partners is required when frigidity is caused because of relationship problems.

2. Psychotherapy is important for getting rid of your insecurities and hidden fears.

3. Certain dietary modifications are essential. You should add oysters, avocados, olive oil, eggs, soy, pumpkin seeds, nuts, sprouts, soy, vitamin E, zinc, and chocolates to your diet.

4. You can utilise herbs such as Damiana, chive, Kava Kava, wild yam, sarsaparilla, dong quai, ginger root, and Siberian ginseng for curing frigidity naturally. You can also use curative products made with the mentioned herbs, such as certain capsules, and gels.

5. Regular exercise and yoga are important for boosting your sexual health.

6. You may spend time with your husband watching erotic movies or reading erotic books together.

7. You should sleep for long hours for uplifting your sexual desire.

8. You should get rid of stress via methods such as spas, meditation, and other mindful exercises for unleashing your sexual potential.

9. You can also take medicines which are DHEA and testosterone based for curing frigidity.

If you experience the symptoms of female frigidity and do not get aroused sexually, you must not ignore the matter and take professional help for curing it.

The post-partum period is the first few (usually six) weeks after delivering the baby. Sex might be the last thing you think of during this time. Sexual desires might decrease due to the following:

1. Healing from the incision (in case of a vaginal delivery)
2. Cesarean birth healing (abdominal incisions)
3. Fatigue caused by the whole birthing process and pregnancy
4. Stress caused by the newly born baby (especially more so in case of triplets or twins)
5. Shifts in the hormonal levels
6. Breastfeeding related breast sores
7. Emotional difficulties such as parenting anxiety, relationship problems with the baby’s father
8. Postpartum blues

After the incision (if any) has fully healed along with the delicate vaginal tissues, it is generally safer to have intercourse. It might take a few weeks for the healing process to fully complete. The doctor will be able to give a more personal advice on when it is ok to start having sex again. Usually in case of a normal delivery, the waiting period is 6 weeks. The emotional readiness and physical comfort is extremely important as well. In a lot of cases it might take up to a year for normal sex life of the couple to resume again.

Also, there is a common misconception amongst many couples that during the postpartum period, having a baby again isn’t possible. Condoms should be used if you aren’t abstaining from sex in the postpartum period. This helps in avoiding an unplanned pregnancy and the complications that can arise from two successive deliveries.

The body goes through a lot of changes after giving birth. Low libido affects the sex drive. The body needs time to recuperate and might not be ready for sex immediately after giving birth as it switches itself to give care for the new born. A break is often necessary as the body and mind heal.

Vaginal dryness in the postpartum weeks is also very common. Lube and lots of it can help. The vagina, in the initial weeks, stretches out quite a bit. It slowly starts returning to its original contracted state as the muscles become tight again.

It’s also important to remember that you can be intimate with your partner after you give birth to a baby, without having sex. Body contact and cuddles are ways of expressing your affection towards your partner. Love doesn’t need to be dependent on sex!

Honeymoon impotence is quite common in orthodox societies where pre-marriage sex is considered more or less a taboo. It is a common scene in such areas where newlyweds arrive at a sexologist’s cabin, complaining about their inability to perform sexual intercourse on their first night. The idea of First time sex itself gives goosebumps to most men and women. All the anxieties and worries can lead to either male’s erection droop or female’s vaginal contraction.

Reason behind Honeymoon Impotence
In most of the cases, ignorance and lack of awareness form the basic reason behind honeymoon erectile dysfunction. Especially in societies where sex education is not that common, it is likely that men and women are even unaware of common sexual positions. Family pressure, fear of displeasing the newlywed partner may get so overpowering that it may lead to erectile droop among men. Failure at the first instance may also create psychological pressure on the couple and as a result may lead to a series of impotence. The more the man is frantic to perform, the more are the chances that his erection shrivels. Similarly, the woman can also suffer from vaginismus. This is a condition in which out of anxiety and fear, the vagina of a female contracts so much that the penis can’t penetrate. All such scenes must be handled with patience and by consulting a sexologist before the things start getting worse.

Remedy

1. Education is bliss: The first and the foremost remedy is educating oneself about male and female genital parts, normal sex positions which are easy to carry out etc. A brief illustration with the help of any video before performing actual sex may prove quite fruitful.
2. Mutual Stimulation: It is not advisable to get obsessed only at penetrating the penis inside women’s vagina. The newlywed should first prefer to get comfortable with each other while making love. Try to find pleasure in the sexual act rather than ruining things by getting anxious at the inability to penetrate at the first instant. The couple can also try masturbating each other. The male can make the female genital parts familiar to his penis by bringing it near to vagina. Some sexologists even advise to make use of sex toys like vibrator so that female vagina can get used to of infusing penis in it. Even some prescribed erection enhancing medicines can solve your case.
3. Master your Brain: In most of the cases, it is the brain that plays the trick. So it is better not to hesitate. Share all your anxieties and worries with your partner. Get comfortable with each other and do not let the psychological factors to control your sexual act.

Patience is definitely a deciding factor. Give time and open up with your partner and this will help in abating all your fears. In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

Hypersexuality is also known as nymphomania or compulsive sexual behavior. When a person is preoccupied with sexual fantasies to the point of dysfunction for at least six months, he or she suffers from hypersexuality. These sexual fantasies are usually combined with a compulsive pursuit of non-intimate or casual sex, excessive masturbation, pornography, objective partner sex and romantic intensity.It is more complex than just having an unusually high sex drive becausesexual activity gives the addict an intense feeling of euphoria, suppressingother thoughts which cause distress, self-loathing and shame. This interferes with the daily regimen of activities. Treatment and management of sex addiction is imperative because it is disruptive and harmful not just to you but also to others.It also damages relationships, careers and self-esteem. 

Symptoms:
People suffering from hyper sexuality exhibit the following symptoms: 
1. They engage in compulsive masturbation
2. They frequently hire prostitutes
3. Usage of phone sex services excessively
4. They have multiple extramarital affairs
5. They plan out sexual activities excessively
6. They engage in one night stands frequently
7. They are emotionally detached from their sexual partners
8. They prefer unprotected sex
9. They obsess about an unattainable sexual partner
10. They show tendencies of paraphilia

Causes: 
The primary and identifiable causes of hyper sexuality are as follows:
1. Biochemical imbalances in neurotransmitters and nervous system disorders
2. Medical conditions that damage certain parts of the brain of affect brain functioning
3. Overproduction of hormones such as androgens (present in males and females) 

Sexual addiction is believed to be a dysfunctional adult response towards emotional or character regulatory deficits and innate personality as well as abuse, early detachment disorders and trauma. Hypersexuality is a symptom of a lot of mental disorders such as bipolar disorder, adult attention deficit disorder or obsessive compulsive disorder. 
Sex addicts usually do not seek treatment for their addiction until the consequences of their activities are dire and have an overt negative effect on their health, relationships, finances and career. Since addicts feel ashamed and despise themselves, they usually do not seek help until they hit rock bottom. However, it is crucial to treat this disorder in order to lead a happy and fulfilling life where one is not controlled by their addiction. 

Treatments:
Hyper sexuality can be treated using the following methods:

• Psychotherapy
• Group Therapy
• Family and couples therapy
• Support groups
• Self-help groups
• Medications
  • Antidepressants
  • Anti-androgens
  • Luteinizing hormone releasing hormone (LHRH)
  • Mood Stabilizers
  • Naltrexone

Premature ejaculation is a form of disorder that commonly occurs in male. The normal ejaculation period for a normal male ranges from 6 - 8 minutes. The intra vaginal latency time may last for minimum of two minutes, but if this goes less than two minutes then this condition is diagnosed as premature ejaculation. Premature ejaculation is common in adults for various reason and it often causes problems in a relationship.

Ways to overcome premature ejaculation
Overcoming premature ejaculation requires more of psychological changes and treatment than physical treatment

1. Practice the simple exercise to gain control over your ejaculation. Masturbate and stop before the final stage of the feel to ejaculate. Stop masturbating and divert yourself with any other thoughts of your likes. This relaxing time may last for even 5 minutes. Continue masturbation after five minutes and ejaculate the collected semen this allows your penis to improve the control over ejaculation.
2. Practice Kegel exercise regularly. Many doctors have seen improvement in their patient’s condition with the regular use of this exercise. This gradually increases the intra vaginal latency period for more than two minutes.
3. Talk with your partner and work together to solve the problem.
4. Condom usage may cause less stimulation effect to the penis thus, reduces the ejaculation time. This helps the male with premature ejaculation to increase the ejaculation time. It is much better if you prefer thicker condoms
5. Reduction in the friction may cause less stimulation to the penis. So trying to use more lubricant helps for male with premature ejaculation. But some partners may feel reduction in their satisfaction level with this increased use of lubricant.
6. Orgasm within 24 hours helps to increase the ejaculation time. Masturbate in the morning and be with your partner in night for a long period of intra vaginal latency time.
7. Using refractory period. Relaxation after one sexual attempt is the refractory period. For those males with premature ejaculation they can use this period and make the second erection at earlier time and start with the second sexual act which may last for longer time. As this idea may be difficult for many individual there are people who have experienced positive results of using this in overcoming premature ejaculation.

In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!