The Power Of Passion

Passion is the energy that can fuel a project, or a task. It gives you the energy to jump out of bed every morning or go to bed late after you have worked out the last block that was stopping your passion from flowing. It has a similar role to inspiration. When we engage in something we are passionate about, we feel free from external and internal blocks and in control. Time recedes into the background, and we feel empowered to engage in flow. 
Research has shown that passion has brought people back to life and start thriving again, making them more emotionally stable and a strong mental equilibrium. Abraham Maslow, a US psychologist said that without passion, nobody would reach their  self actualised  state.

Passion can make or break you. Passion can make you feel invigorated, committed, focussed, connected, courageous, creative, satisfied and productive. A man can be passionate about sports and take out time every week to indulge in his passion, while keeping his boss and family happy. 

On the other hand, it can also ruin your life by being obsessed and possessed by the fire of passion. A workaholic, who doesn t go back home till 2 am and reports to office again at 10 am, he who doesn t see his children nor relaxes or does any physical activity is ensuring a quick burnout in the guise of following a passion. A harmful passion can be diagnosed easily by gauging whether it controls you or you feel in control of your life, which is about harmonious passion.

WHY  YOU MUST NEVER GIVE UP YOUR PASSION

1. Helps you unwind and relax - Zafar liked to do puzzles, crosswords and Sudoku when he started his day. It freshened him up and his mind became sharper as he looked at various permutations and combinations for the words and numbers. Daily new neural pathways were getting stronger in his brain. This exercised his left brain adequately every day. He slept well. Do remember not to do such exercises before sleeping.   

2. Expands your life - Some hobbies like travelling, cooking, collecting trivia has its own benefits. This involves physical activity and meeting up with other people. This helps a person to remain connected with society and keep active. Ram liked travelling so much that he gave up his job to become a globe trotter and tied up with a TV channel to commentate on tourist locations. He earns handsomely from his hobby. His self esteem has doubled since then.

3. Keeps your mind productively channelized - Nandini s problem was that she didn t have anything to do while the kids were away at school. She had started feeling depressed and got headaches often. She knew that she connected well with the children in the neighbourhood and had a flair for painting. She started teaching them painting in the evenings. Soon she became very busy and had no time to get bored.  She not only made new friends, she also earned the respect and awe of her community. She feels energised, happy and motivated to work while looking forward to life.

4. Success at work - Often passion has been linked to success at work. It is seen that people who are passionate, committed and hardworking often excel in their work as they have a goal to achieve. They look forward to their day and any hurdles or failures don t deter them from trying again. Neela was always passionate about becoming an IT professional. She had grown up playing with computers. Despite her family not agreeing with her choice of profession, she went ahead and burnt the midnight oil to score high in school and college. She got picked up in campus placements and today she holds a coveted position in the company. She has motivated many girls from her conservative community to study and get work.

5. Keep away illness - Having a hobby or working passionately has its own share of health benefits. People have reported higher physical and emotional immunity. They had deep and strong bonding with their community. They didn t suffer from insomnia, depression, dementia and anxiety and hope was alive in them till the end. They knew that success and failure are two sides of the same coin. 




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5 Logical Reasons You Must Never Give Up On Your Passion


7 CHARACTERISTICS OF EMOTIONALLY STRONG PEOPLE

Emotionally strong people are better able to manage the stresses and distresses of daily life, and recover more quickly from challenges and crises when they arise. Is your emotional engine strong enough to take you through the ups and downs of life? Are you riding a bullock cart which can topple over anytime you pass through a broken road or are you driving a four wheel, all terrain vehicle, which will ensure you a safe trip through all the rocky terrains of your life?

A common cultural belief is that people who don’t cry and are unemotional, detached are the emotionally strong ones...and the ones who cry easily and exhibit emotional turmoil are the weaker ones. Well, this is just a myth and not an accurate indicator of one’s mental and emotional strength. A person’s internal coping mechanism will determine how strong he/she is emotionally and deal with challenges and bounce back from them. For eg. Two investors invest in a startup company and watch it fail after 5 years of hard work...one cries copious tears and falls apart, the other controls his emotions but feels defeated. Both were not emotionally strong as they couldn’t sustain the pressure and crumbled. It would have been fine if they felt sad and worried over the loss of time, resources and money and then bounced back with fresh ideas and renewed energy, which would have shown their capability to bounce back from difficult situations.

Unfortunately, too many of us judge ourselves incorrectly in exactly such moments. If we react emotionally or tearfully to emotionally challenging situations we scold ourselves for being weak, even when we have every intention of persisting and moving forward and even when we believe we will eventually succeed. Tears are usually a sign of frustration and disappointment, not defeat. What you believe about your future chances of success and how discouraged you feel in the long term is far more important than how often you cry in response to stresses and bad news.

The following list will help you decide how emotionally strong you are and where you need to work on yourself:

1) Emotionally strong people are less discouraged by setbacks and disappointments: they see each failure as an opportunity to learn and improvise over the last one. They compare themselves with themselves and define their own measures for failure and success. You could do an analysis of your strengths, limitations, opportunities and impediments in order to get over difficult situations. Geet, a student who didn’t get into his desired subject of IT, sat through 5 years of Law and did some extra courses in corporate law and worked towards fulfilling his dream of working in the Corporate. He felt confident, happy and satisfied with his efforts.

2) Emotionally strong people are more adaptable to change: they welcome and embrace changes in themselves and their environment simply because it brings newer opportunities and learning which can catapult them on their way to success. New boss, different stage of life, children going away are changes that will surely happen. Preparing for them in advance, can help people cope better with changes. When Surabhi got married, she took marital counselling to prepare for the differences that will crop up due to changes in the environment, thinking and attitudes of her inlaws family. She is a happy and successful wife and mother today.

3) Emotionally strong people are able to recognize and express their needs: ability to acknowledge and express your needs is being genuine to yourself and an expression of self care. People who are self aware move faster on the ladder of success as they are devoted and passionate towards their goals and needs. Taking care of your health and exercising along with a professional career makes for an emotionally strong person. You can become aware of your needs and values in counselling and experience contentment and power as you take charge of your life.

4) Emotionally strong people focus on getting around a hurdle rather than on the hurdle itself: focussing on the hurdle can be very emotionally draining and demotivating. Emotionally strong people invest their energies in working through a problem and looking for viable solutions, which ensures their victory over stresses and strains. If you have lost money in business, then working on your sales and marketing skills could get you better gains rather than feeling defeated. Counselling can help you look at problems objectively and from different perspectives. Get in touch with your problem solving skills and feel motivated and accomplished again.

5) Emotionally strong people can learn from mistakes and criticism: who hasn’t been subjected to criticism or made some mistakes? It’s human to err. Working towards excellence rather than perfection and looking for the golden piece of advice in the strong criticism helps emotionally strong people win over situations and important relationships. Sarita, an intelligent and smart woman ignored the critical remarks of her mother in law because she knew that there is a lot to learn from her. She knew which battles to fight and which ones to let go of.

6) Emotionally strong people tend to see the larger perspective in a challenging situation: They don’t get weighed down by smaller defeats when they have the larger picture in mind. An emotionally strong employee, Martin, who experienced office politics, kept his cool and focussed on his work.

7) Emotionally strong people are able to recover more quickly from emotional wounds such as failure or rejection: nobody can reject you unless you give them the permission. Seeing each failure as an opportunity to grow and learn helps. Staying with what you can do differently next time and having fall back plans helps to reduce the impact of failure. Thomas Edison didn’t get deterred by the number of times he could make his bulb glow. He kept looking at different permutations and combinations and kept learning from each mistake. Finally, his bulb glowed and now we all can benefit from the fruits of his hard labour.

If you don’t find yourself scoring high on this list, then there is no need to worry because in personal counselling, you can build emotional strength and capacity to bounce back by working on your mindset and learning more adaptable responses to stresses of daily living.

7 characteristics of emotionally strong people

Depression is often equated with isolation and brooding but this is not always the case. Many people may actually suffer from depression without showing the typical symptoms of this condition. Hence, this form of depression may go unnoticed for many years. Such cases are known as high-functioning depression. Some of the symptoms of this condition include:

Having difficulty expressing happiness: Though a person may be able to work normally, a person suffering from high-functioning depression will find it difficult to express emotions such as happiness. Thus he or she may not know how to act in the event of a promotion at work, the beginning of a new relationship or any other such happy events. In such cases, the happiness a person experiences from these events is temporary and muted.
Lowered energy levels: Unlike not being able to get out of bed when suffering from typical forms of depression, a person suffering from high-functioning depression can follow his or her usual routine. However, they often find themselves lacking the energy they would normally have and feel the need to put extra effort into their normal tasks. This reduces the amount of satisfaction derived from completing tasks.
Persistent self-doubt: While being self-critical is good to a certain extent, a person suffering from this form of depression is rarely satisfied with their work. Even when recognised by their peers or given an award for their work, they feel that this praise is misguided and have trouble accepting it. Thus, suffering from this condition is akin to swimming a race against the current and with additional unnecessary weights.
Substance abuse: Since this form of depression can go undiagnosed for many years, patients often turn to alcohol and other addictive substances in frustration. This can further delay diagnosis as many of the symptoms of this condition can also be attributed to substance abuse.
Feeling like a failure: Many people suffering from this condition feel as though they are constantly wasting time no matter how much they achieve in a day. This can make them feel hopeless and cause frequent changes in jobs.
The good news is that depression can be cured. Hence if someone around you or you, yourself experience such symptoms, talk to a doctor. Alternatively, you could make a few changes in your lifestyle to lift your mood. Try meditating in the morning or fit in some light exercise into your day. You could even take up a new hobby. However, this cannot replace cognitive therapy and psychological counselling.

High Functioning Depression & Anxiety!

Depression is a mental health disorder where one experiences lack of interest in activities and has a continuously depressed mood which can lead to serious impairments in that person s daily life.

Day by day, the number of patients suffering from depression is increasing. More than the facts, it is various myths people hear that makes them more vulnerable when suffering from this mental health disorder. Below are the 5 common myths and facts regarding depression.

Myth #1: Lazy people suffer from depression
People who have a lethargic life suffer from depression and hardworking people never experience it. This is probably one of the most widely believed myths about depression. However, in reality, it is excessive work pressure and overworking and the feeling that they are bound with responsibilities and are being exploited at the workplace that causes depression. Anyone can develop this mental condition, and workload and lifestyle do not always have something to do with depression.

Myth #2: Women are the main victims of depression
Another popular myth regarding depression is that it is women who mainly suffer from it. Yes, it is true that women are more sensitive than men, but developing depression has nothing to do with gender. Anyone, at any age, at any time, can suffer from depression.

Myth #3: Talking can never help in easing depression
There are some people who believe that depression is a mental health disorder, is only treated with psychiatric medicines that can help in dealing with this condition. However, what they don't understand is that doing something constructive and having positive conversations with their loved ones can actually benefit their mental health. Even, psychiatrists believe that talking sessions are one of the ways of treating depression.

Myth #4: Depression is the same as sadness
Consistently unhappy and sad people are often considered as being depressed. However, the fact is that both sadness and depression are two different things. While one can get over the former condition of feeling low and sad; suffering from depression leads to chemical changes inside the brain, causing changes in the behaviour, thinking, etc. of the affected person, thereby persistently damaging the daily life.

Myth #5: There s no link between depression and Physical exercise
Many people assume that physical exercise isn't helpful in dealing with depression since it is a mental illness and not a physical condition. However, the fact is that moderate amount of physical exercise not only helps in improving mental aspects but also boosts the concentration power of the person.

No matter how mild or serious the form of depression one suffers from, opting for psychiatric help becomes crucial to avoid risks of deterioration of the condition in any way. After all, a professional psychiatrist can not only help one suffering from depression by treating them with necessary medications and therapies but also help in differentiating the facts from the myths thoroughly.

5 Myths About Depression Debunked!

You Need to Read This To Stay Away From Depression!

Depression robs people of their energy, ability to focus and pleasure. It makes them lose the joy of doing anything. In advanced cases, people may also lose their will to live. Depression is caused by factors that are mostly psychological, although a few can be physical. Certain habits and ways of living also lead to depression.

Here are few habits you must avoid.

1) Lack of Exercise: Being inactive affects your state of mind and can lead to a feeling of being depressed. If you are inactive, you also become lazy or tend to eat more, due to lack of anything better to do. This may be even more depressing.

SOLUTION: Exercise ensures your physical and mental well-being. Whenever you feel depressed, remember to exercise. Even a 20 minute brisk walking makes your brain produce the 'feel-good' chemicals, which keeps you active and in high spirits. If this not possible then just use the stairs instead of the lift, or take a few rounds of your block at whatever pace you can do. Remember to be regular in your efforts.

2) Improper Diet: Eating foods regularly which are loaded with hydrogenated fats, refined sugars and processed foods increase blood sugar levels suddenly and then dip suddenly. Our bodies and minds become lethargic with such foods. These chemicals affect the limbic brain( emotional centre) directly, making us feel blue, irritated and fatigued.

SOLUTION: Eating healthy is not only good for your body but also your brain. Food stuffs that contain omega-3 fats are referred to as brain foods and lack of such foods makes you vulnerable to depression. Eat crap and you feel like crap! Since our bodies cannot manufacture omega-3 fats, it has to be sourced from foods such as coldwater fish and seafood. Eating whole grains, fibre, vegetables, fruits rich in carbs and plenty of water Eat healthy for a healthy mind.

3) Poor Sleeping Habits and Stress: If you constantly deprive yourself of sleep or oversleep, you create a situation that risks depression. Not getting the recommended 7-9 hours of sleep leaves you irritable, agitated or hyper vigilant. A person who hasn't slept enough cannot perform daily functions properly and may feel frustrated or begin to feel trapped. A sense of loss of control makes one feel depressed. Most people don't understand that just getting enough sleep can help in keeping depression at bay.

SOLUTION: Sleeping well has a restorative and rejuvenative action on the body and mind. The body repairs itself while sleeping, dreams are a way of expelling unwanted thoughts and emotions, people develop higher immunity when they sleep well, you have better cognitive functions. You will make sound decisions with fewer errors, concentrating and focussing will be easier. Tasks will seem easier and effortless. A good sleep leaves people feeling energised, happier and alert.

4) Isolation: the experience of being separated from others - may result from being physically removed from others, as when a person lives in a remote area, or it can result from the perception of being removed from a community, such as when a person feels socially or emotionally isolated from others. Social isolation is distinct from the experience of solitude, which is simply the state of being alone, usually by choice. Taking time to be alone can be a healthy, rejuvenating experience that allows us to reconnect with our own needs, goals, beliefs, values, and feelings. But when a person experiences too much solitude or feels socially isolated from others, he or she may develop feelings of loneliness, social anxiety, helplessness, or depression, among others. 

SOLUTION: Having an active social life with real and genuine people whom you gel with and have common interests is like an elixir of life. It infuses a person with a sense of wellbeing, safety, security and belonging, which is necessary for us humans. It forms social support not only in good times but also in tough times when we need help, support, suggestions and encouragement. A shared smile, a nod, a wink, laughter or story can go on a long way to make you feel uplifted.

5) Ruminating Constantly: Dwelling on negative thoughts each day, sets you up for depression. Constantly thinking of failure, loss, rejection or past events is harmful. Ruminating about something you cannot change not only makes you depressed but also drives you insane. It fosters feelings of helplessness, worthlessness and hopelessness, which are so common in depression.

SOLUTION:There are practical ways of fighting this problem, like keeping yourself busy and distracted, or just using an outlet to channel the feelings out of your system. Have a satisfying hobby to fill up your free time. Taking care of a pet, social work also helps people feel good about themselves. Use logic and rational reasoning to combat negative thinking patterns. Seeing meaning in a loss is very helpful too. Look at the positive and brighter side of each situation. Using humour to lighten some tough situations help keep the mental and emotional balance from tipping.

Have any further questions on depression or mental health? Click on consult privately to ask me.

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You Need to Read This To Stay Away From Depression!

Role of relationship problems in depression and suicides - 
Almost everyday we read about people ending their lives by committing suicides from celebrities to common man to even children . Although this is not permitted in any religion and there is a legal debate on whether it should be legalized, the fact remains that people are driven towards this unfortunate step. Let's take a look at the common reasons for suicides to become so very common.

1) Lack of intimacy- We see that although we are surrounded by people most of people are having friends only on Facebook. Even among the people we interact everyday nobody wants to open up with anyone or allow you to open up with them.The fact that you are surrounded by people who don't share themselves with you intimately starts pulling your mind downwards. Work colleagues are bothered only about work, family is only bothered about the income you are generating, partners are obsessed with how much you can spend on them, friends are occupied with what benefits you can share with them. Therefore all in all, despite having all relationships, people feel left out and alone like as if their inner self has been left unwanted and uncared of. The monotony of mechanical life hastens the culmination of this abuse into drastic steps like suicide.

2) High demands- People are often left to fend with high demands from them from their social circle. Many people cannot attempt this and some who attempt are not able to make it. This leaves them with a feeling of failure which is often frowned and looked down upon whether it is a student or a professional. It is no surprise that today even below 10 years olds are successfully attempting suicides.

3) Inappropriate planning- Planning is a key necessity for successful results whether it is financial or relationships. but unfortunately many people are unable to obtain the correct know how which will enable to implement their plans successfully.

4) Inability to cope- Many people plan to do things but are unable to cope with the harsh realities that come with the plans. To some it may be unseen to some unbearable. So although they set out on doing something the journey is not what they had expected.

5) Lack of results- Sometimes although everything is planned well, executed well and completed well it does not fetch us the rewards that may seem appropriate to the level of efforts. This is something that is very difficult to deal for most people and is a result of many unfortunate casualties.

6) Lack of desire-It is very important to have something to look forward to in life. But unfortunately in an age where drinking water and using the toilet cost s money many people cannot think of having something to look forward to and hence this unfortunate step.

Therefore, you have to be very prudent in what we are doing today because we can never predict which way our lives may go and even importantly which way you may yourself go based purely on circumstances beyond our control dependent on the choices we make today or others make for us. Although suicide is not a sensible solution to any problem it does remain a common reality. If you are feeling suicidal please remember to seek help.

Please feel free to consult me privately for further assistance.

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Health Tip - Role of Relationship Problems in Depression and Suicides

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