All you need to know about Premature Ejaculation

Many of the sexual issues are primarily not big problems. However, because of the taboo and inhibition around them, they are not discussed openly, hence they also fail to get resolved and become bigger. In fact most of the times there are no visible symptoms of any functional problems. Many of them are very basic issues and because of ignorance, myths, and social taboos lead to development of anxieties, distress and further worsening of the problem.

Often men are concerned about their performance in bed with their partner. They worry about- how best then can do, masturbation habits, size of penis and sperm quality. 

Consequences of Premature ejaculation (PE): 
Both you and your partner may end up experiencing highly unsatisfactory sex. In fact, it can significantly increase anxiety, which may deteriorate the problem. 

PE is one such sexual issue. It's not a disease; Not at all..!! 
If a person is sexually fit and experiences normal erections but just fail to hold the orgasm/ discharge for reasonable time then he is suffering from premature ejaculation. It's  a very normal problem, which if managed properly it can be easily resolved.

We will discuss this PE in 4 parts covering: what it is in actual, how does it happen, how to approach to resolve this problem with behavioural methods, exercise, techniques and medical remedies present in both modern and alternative medicine. 
Let s understand the problem in this 1st part!

What is Premature Ejaculation? 

Premature (early) ejaculation also referred to as rapid ejaculation; also called as early discharge. 
PE is the most common type of sexual dysfunction in men younger than 40 years and seen across all age groups. In elderly men (>60 years) erectile dysfunction is more common. A study conducted by the Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed that this condition is almost equally prevalent in sexually active men of all age groups. 
If a man experiences uncontrollable ejaculation (discharge of semen from your penis) either before or shortly after sexual penetration (usually within 1-2 minutes of penetration), he may be suffering from PE. The Mayo clinic at the United States defines PE as a condition in which  a man  always or nearly always ejaculates within one minute of penetration."

Instances of PE:
An occasional instance of premature ejaculation might not be cause of concern, but, if the problem occurs more than 50% of attempted sexual relations signifies existence of abnormal pattern for which treatment is required.

Premature ejaculation takes place with negligible sexual stimulation and even before the desire 
to ejaculate. Another way of describing PE by most therapist or clinicians is the occurrence of ejaculation sooner during sexual intercourse than he or his partner would like. 

This broad definition thus avoids specifying a precise  normal  duration for sexual activity and reaching a climax. The duration of sexual activity is highly variable and depends on various factors specific to each individual. Take a situation, a male may reach orgasm after 7 to 8 minutes of sexual intercourse, but if his partner is able to achieve climax mostly in 5 minutes and both are satisfied with this timing, then this is not defined as PE. 

Alternatively, a male might delay his ejaculation for up to 15- 20 minutes of sexual intercourse, but if his partner, even with foreplay, requires 25-30 minutes of total sexual activity before reaching climax, he may still consider his ejaculation premature because his partner has not been satisfied (at least, not through intercourse). But in routine practice this kind of situation is NOT called as PE. So every individual and every couple is unique. Same individual may have different sexual behaviour with different partners and different circumstances. Varied situations and varied places of performing the act have a vital role to play in determining the outcomes of individual sexual performance/s.



Knowing Premature Ejaculation - PART 1: Understanding What is PE

Alchol can it affect your intimacy level with your partner, yes! But with this you might be wondering how can that be possible when you actually sustain yourself for long, maybe longer than you should be. It is probably the  whiskey penis . Alcohol may give you a sense of elation at one point of time, but it is essentially a nervous depressant. The over consumption of alcohol mainly has a reduced effect on sensitivity for both men and women.

How alcohol affects sex life in men: The effect of alcohol on the sex life of men is immense. In most cases, chronic and acute cases of alcohol consumption have shown to reduce the production of testosterone in men. Since testosterone is the hormone that results in the increase in libido in men, the effects of alcohol really reduce the performance in men. It has shown to reduce pleasurability and it can also reduce the intensity of orgasms. Sometimes, it can cause difficulty in ejaculation or delayed ejaculation.

How alcohol affects sex life in women: Alcohol can have a very mixed effect on women in general. While it can increase sexual arousal and desire, it can also result in low sensitivity. Women have a higher percentage of fat as compared to water in their bodies, this means that alcohol has a more profound effect on their bodies as compared to that in men. Their bodies also take longer to process and eliminate the alcohol. While some women report a heightened sense of sexual arousal and an increase in the duration of the orgasm, a large number of women also complain of lesser lubrication.

Alcohol also has a psychological effect; that is the loss of inhibition that may help in developing carnal instincts when intoxicated. This psychological effect may have a more profound effect than the physiological effects as a result of which women might claim that alcohol does indeed help in better sex.

Alcohol - How it Affects Your Sex Life?

In today's time there are various factors, which affects our relation with our partner and among such factors is low libido. Low libido or a decreased sexual activity can affect a relationship in a big way. In some extreme cases, the impact is such that it leads to irreconcilable marital discords. Time and again, an individual, irrespective of their age, sex or occupation can go through periods of low libido. Decreased sexual desire over a longer period of time needs thorough investigation. It could be an indication of something big and serious lying ahead. 
7 critical factors that attribute to low libido: 

1. Hormonal imbalance: women, mostly menopausal and postmenopausal, experience low libido. This is because during menopause, there is a significant drop in the oestrogen level. Reduced oestrogen level can have a huge impact on sexual desires and performance. It can also make the vagina dry, resulting in painful penetration and intercourse. Hormonal imbalance or changes during pregnancy can also result in low libido in females. In males, low libido has been found to be associated with decreased levels of testosterone. 

2. Stress: an individual's mental and emotional state is greatly reflected in their sexual performance. A sound mental health can enhance a performance thousand folds. On the contrary, factors like depression, anxiety and stress, lowers the sexual desires in a person. To enjoy a healthy and normal sexual life, it is important to keep stress and chronically blue moods at bay.

3. Sound sleep to the rescue: the benefits of a sound sleep are beyond imagination. A good 6 - 8 hours of sleep can do your sexual desires or libido a world of good. A sleep deprived soul will be agitated and cranky, both on and off the bed. Continuous sleep deprivation can also lower the testosterone level, resulting in low libido.

4. Medical condition: medical conditions like diabetes, cardiac problems, high blood pressure, or ailments of the coronary artery can rupture an individual's sexual life immensely. Improper functioning of the thyroid glands is another factor contributing to low libido. In such cases, it is best to consult a physician at the earliest. Rest legs syndrome can also contribute to low libido. It is a condition whereby, a male experience an uncontrollable urge to move his legs.

5. Smoking: a killer habit, which affects a person's sexual activity is smoking. Drug abuse and drinking (to some extent) can be equally responsible for a low libido.

6. Change in weight: a sudden change in body weight (gain or loss) can play a significant role in low libido. Take pride in your body structure. There is nothing to be ashamed of.

7. Take a break: boredom can mask your sexual life greatly. Break the monotony, take short breaks, go on vacations and low libido will be a thing of the past.

7 Things That Might Be Causing Your Low Libido

5 mind reasons you might not be getting an orgasm

Sex is not only a physical need, sex is a great way to emotionally bond and get closer to your partner as well. Any dissatisfaction in the bedroom can affect other aspects of your life, and can lead to fights, squabbles and general unhappiness. The inability to orgasm can become a major bone of contention. There can be various reasons behind the inability to climax. Some of the common ones are detailed below:

1. Lack of stimulation

Studies show that only 25% of women reach climax during sexual intercourse. The remaining 75% of women require more stimulation, like fingers or even toys and tongues to reach orgasm. Amongst this is a subset of 10-15% of women who never reach orgasm. Thus, a large number of women require extra stimulation to achieve climax during sex. You must talk to your partner about putting in some extra effort and providing the extra stimulation you need to achieve climax.

2. Over-thinking

Many men and women over-think their actions in bed. From their expressions to how they are reacting and how they are making their partner feel - everything is under constant scrutiny and revision. This leads to a lot of stress, which can hinder your ability to reach orgasm. You need to relax in the bedroom, because whatever you do will feel good in some way or another. Your anxieties can also distract you from what is going on, which means you don't get the chance to fully experience the pleasures of sex. If it helps, speak to your partner about your anxieties and tell them what you are stressing about during sex.

3. Differences between men and women 

Men are visual creatures. This means that what they see turns them on. A woman's orgasm, on the other hand, happens in her head. Thus, men and women have different roots to their stimulation. Lack of an orgasm might mean either of these needs isn't being fulfilled. A great way to work around this and make sex more fun is to include a lot of foreplay in your love-making session. You can do this by trying out role-playing or using sex toys. Make sure to take it slow for a great build-up to your orgasm.

4. Performance issues

Porn has an impact on your sex life. It can increase your expectations to a considerable extent, which may not be fulfilled, thus hampering your experience in the bedroom. A lot of people become so focused on reproducing that experience that they forget that its real life. The focus on performance overwhelms their actual experience of sex, which results in an inability to reach orgasm. Try to accept the fact that you don't really have to perform for your partner. Your partner appreciates you for what you are, despite everything.

5. Mental blocks

A problem in the relationship, certain health conditions like depression, past trauma and negative social conditioning can all have negative impacts on your ability to orgasm. Talk to your partner about past trauma if you have any, and what your triggers are. Consider speaking to a sex therapist as mental health issues should never be neglected. Depression hits the libido hard, and the problem is only compounded by antidepressants. Negative social conditioning can only be helped by therapy, so try to reach out to a mental health professional.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'consult'.
Related Tip: Why You Must Try Kegel Exercises for a Happier Sex Life

5 Mind Reasons You Might Not Be Getting an Orgasm

4 Things to Know Before You Lose Your Virginity

Losing your virginity can be a big experience and can be exciting as well as nerve-wrecking at the same time. Its significance is different for everyone and there are no wrong or right ways to lose your virginity. Making your first time a memorable experience is easy if you know and remember these 4 things:

1. Relax

You might be conscious about your body or nervous about pain or pleasing your partner, but you need not be. It is natural to feel insecure and nervous, but communicating your reservations with your partner will clear the air between both of you, helping you level your expectations and relax. Your first time is about exploring each other's body and pleasuring each other as well as an understanding partner will help you relax and forget your insecurities.

2. It might hurt a bit

If you are a woman, intercourse for the first time might hurt a bit if your vagina is not well lubricated before you have sex. Also, you might feel some pain and/or bleed if your hymen tears, but it will not be excruciating pain. Worrying about the pain is a lot scarier than the actual pain. Some women may not experience any pain at all. However, you should make sure you are well lubricated. Foreplay is a great way to get ready for intercourse and if it is still painful you could use additional lubricants to minimize discomfort and pain.

3. Go slow

If you are a man, help your partner be comfortable by going slow in accordance to their wish. Going too fast may hurt your partner if they are not comfortable and make your first time a traumatic experience. Try to gauge your partner's reactions and proceed in a way pleasurable to both of you. Penetrating too soon might cause you to ejaculate too quickly before your partner has climaxed. Indulge in foreplay so that both of you are ready. If your partner ejaculates too fast or is unable to hold his erection, do not feel rejected or angry, support him and help him get aroused again, as it is just an effect of nervousness and excitement.

4. Use protection

There is no truth in the saying that you cannot get an STD on your first time. It is completely possible and the only way to prevent that is to use condoms or not have penetrative sex. Women can get pregnant during unprotected sex and unless you plan to become pregnant, panicking about being pregnant for days after your first time will ruin your first time and peace of mind. Use birth control and/or condoms to prevent unwanted pregnancy after your first time, and both your partner and you will be able to enjoy losing your virginity without any worries.



4 Things to Know Before You Lose Your Virginity

5 lifestyle changes that directly improve your sex life

You can improve your sexual experience as well as any sexual problem that you may encounter by adopting healthy lifestyle habits. A healthy lifestyle is vital for experiencing sexual arousal, which requires your overall health and cardiovascular system to be in their best form.

These 5 lifestyle changes will help you to achieve your goal:

1. Quitting smoking
Smoking causes the development of a condition known as vasoconstriction (which is a contraction of the blood vessels that brings about a decrease in blood flow), not to mention damage to the veins and arteries. The small veins in the penis are typically more prone to this kind of damage. The only way you can prevent this kind of damage from happening is by kicking this habit. As a consequence, you experience an increase in your sex drive as well as an improvement in your sex life.


2. Exercising regularly
Exercising regularly enables your body's cardiovascular system to remain healthy and this is important for maintaining and sustaining an erection as well as increasing your sex drive. It is also believed that exercise can increase sex hormones and endorphins level in a woman's body, apart from helping her to improve her body image.


3. Having a healthy diet
For good sexual health, you need to have fruits and vegetables that are rich in anti-oxidants such as strawberries, oranges, spinach or broccoli and omega - 3 fatty acids rich food options such as walnuts, flaxseeds, salmon or tuna. Taking supplements can also help in boosting your libido.


4. Limiting your drinks
Drinking in moderate amounts can help in protecting you from heart disease and certain cancers. But if you have too much of alcohol, it can act as a depressant and lead to anxiety problems as well as a host of sexual problems including delayed ejaculation, erections, and vaginal dryness. Ideally, you should have one drink a day if you're a woman and two in the case of men.

5. Reducing stress
Cutting down your stress levels can see your sex life improving for the better. This is because it raises the levels of hormones that get in the way of your sex hormones, namely, cortisol or stress hormone, and adrenaline (a hormone produced by the adrenal gland).

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'consult'.
Related Tip: Symptoms of Psycho-Sexual Disorder You Need to Know

5 Lifestyle Changes That Directly Improve Your Sex Life

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