For a healthy relation it is important that we learn to communicate our feelings with our partners. Foreplay not only plays an essential role in sexual arousal prior to the act of sexual intercourse, but it also has a number of health benefits for both men and women, which are both physical and emotional in nature. It also works towards increasing intimacy between couples and often leads to a higher level of sexual satisfaction, again for both sexes. 

Here are some foreplay moves you can use to make your time in the bedroom more satisfactory.

1. Engage in conversation: Communicating with your partner is often a great way to get things started. Talking dirty not only increases intimacy between the couple, but also makes it more fun for both, thus reducing stress level, it often reduces the performance anxiety disorder, especially in men.

2. Take it slow: Taking your time during foreplay, with prolonged periods of kissing and sexual stimulation, can exponentially increase levels of arousal for both sexes, and thus add to the chances of reaching orgasm in the ensuing act of intercourse. Many women have also reported that climaxing during foreplay itself increases the probability of achieving multiple orgasms, due to release of a high number of endorphins, thus inducing feelings of euphoria.

3. Try to provide equal attention to all erogenous zones: Spending time in stimulation of each and every erogenous zone of the body such as the neck, breasts and clitoris (for women), penis and scrotum (for men), etc., can often prove to be very useful in sexually arousing your partner and increasing chances of achieving an orgasm.

4. Erotic massages work great: Deep and sensuous massages, especially of erogenous zones, coupled with small breaks to kiss your partner can lead to high levels of arousal due to the friction between your hands and their skin, which aids the release of several arousal hormones, and works great to maximize pleasure.  

5. Engage in oral sex: Though many may be averse to the idea of engaging in oral sex, it has been found that it has a number of health benefits. It not only acts as a stress buster but also helps regulate blood pressure levels, increases chances of conception, relieves pain, and even reduces chances of prostate cancer in men.

5 Foreplay Moves To Get It All Started

All you need to know about Premature Ejaculation

Many of the sexual issues are primarily not big problems. However, because of the taboo and inhibition around them, they are not discussed openly, hence they also fail to get resolved and become bigger. In fact most of the times there are no visible symptoms of any functional problems. Many of them are very basic issues and because of ignorance, myths, and social taboos lead to development of anxieties, distress and further worsening of the problem.

Often men are concerned about their performance in bed with their partner. They worry about- how best then can do, masturbation habits, size of penis and sperm quality. 

Consequences of Premature ejaculation (PE): 
Both you and your partner may end up experiencing highly unsatisfactory sex. In fact, it can significantly increase anxiety, which may deteriorate the problem. 

PE is one such sexual issue. It's not a disease; Not at all..!! 
If a person is sexually fit and experiences normal erections but just fail to hold the orgasm/ discharge for reasonable time then he is suffering from premature ejaculation. It's  a very normal problem, which if managed properly it can be easily resolved.

We will discuss this PE in 4 parts covering: what it is in actual, how does it happen, how to approach to resolve this problem with behavioural methods, exercise, techniques and medical remedies present in both modern and alternative medicine. 
Let s understand the problem in this 1st part!

What is Premature Ejaculation? 

Premature (early) ejaculation also referred to as rapid ejaculation; also called as early discharge. 
PE is the most common type of sexual dysfunction in men younger than 40 years and seen across all age groups. In elderly men (>60 years) erectile dysfunction is more common. A study conducted by the Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed that this condition is almost equally prevalent in sexually active men of all age groups. 
If a man experiences uncontrollable ejaculation (discharge of semen from your penis) either before or shortly after sexual penetration (usually within 1-2 minutes of penetration), he may be suffering from PE. The Mayo clinic at the United States defines PE as a condition in which  a man  always or nearly always ejaculates within one minute of penetration."

Instances of PE:
An occasional instance of premature ejaculation might not be cause of concern, but, if the problem occurs more than 50% of attempted sexual relations signifies existence of abnormal pattern for which treatment is required.

Premature ejaculation takes place with negligible sexual stimulation and even before the desire 
to ejaculate. Another way of describing PE by most therapist or clinicians is the occurrence of ejaculation sooner during sexual intercourse than he or his partner would like. 

This broad definition thus avoids specifying a precise  normal  duration for sexual activity and reaching a climax. The duration of sexual activity is highly variable and depends on various factors specific to each individual. Take a situation, a male may reach orgasm after 7 to 8 minutes of sexual intercourse, but if his partner is able to achieve climax mostly in 5 minutes and both are satisfied with this timing, then this is not defined as PE. 

Alternatively, a male might delay his ejaculation for up to 15- 20 minutes of sexual intercourse, but if his partner, even with foreplay, requires 25-30 minutes of total sexual activity before reaching climax, he may still consider his ejaculation premature because his partner has not been satisfied (at least, not through intercourse). But in routine practice this kind of situation is NOT called as PE. So every individual and every couple is unique. Same individual may have different sexual behaviour with different partners and different circumstances. Varied situations and varied places of performing the act have a vital role to play in determining the outcomes of individual sexual performance/s.



Knowing Premature Ejaculation - PART 1: Understanding What is PE

Did you know keeping your private parts clean can avoid major health issues?

Private parts not only make or break intimacy but also also affect your overall health. Men and women - both need to keep them clean. Here are 5 things that you need to religiously follow.

1) Wash them everyday - In case you are not washing your private parts every day, let me share with you that it is a must-do! Your private parts are moist and house many bacteria. You can use soap to wash but an unscented or mild one. Wash them with lukewarm and clean water.

2) Clean them up before and after sex - Cleaning your private parts before and after sex is of great importance. Before sex because of etiquette. And, after sex for a healthy sexual life ahead! The body fluids or semen which gather on and near your reproductive organs, if not washed can harbour the growth of bad bacteria and set a stage for infections.

3) Groom them well - Untrimmed hair around the private parts is highly unhygienic. It can lead to too much of itching, increasing the chances of infection.

4) Wear fresh undergarments everyday - Unwashed shirts can do but unwashed boxer or briefs is a big no-no. You need to keep your underwears clean &amp; dry. Wear a fresh and clean undergarment every day. Changing your briefs after masturbation, sex, work-outs in gym is also highly recommended.

5) Don't delay visit to a doctor - If you are experiencing any sort of irritation, itching, redness, odour, swelling or other form of discomfort please do not delay in consulting a doctor. It can be a sign of a serious health problem or a severe infection.

5 Sexual Hygiene Musts For Men And Women

Intercourse is meant to be a pleasurable and intimate experience. But it might become an unpleasant act if you are suffering from performance anxiety. When you are mentally occupied by questions such as "Do I look too fat?" or "Did I do that right?", sex stops being a gratifying experience.

Incessant anxiety over your ability or appearance can result in sex becoming nerve-wracking and stressful for you. It might even have you avoiding sex altogether. This psychological condition is termed as sexual performance anxiety.

Sex isn't only a physical reaction, there are emotions tied to it as well. If you are too stressed out and your mind is preoccupied, your body reflects your inner turmoil and you cannot get aroused.

Causes
The causes of sexual performance anxiety include:
1. Fear that you wouldn't be able to satisfy your partner and perform well sexually
2. Body image issues (Such as stressing about your weight)
3. Problems in your relationship
4. Men worry that their penis don't 'measure' up
5. Men might be concerned about taking too much time to orgasm, or about premature ejaculation
6. Women worry about not enjoying the experience or being unable to have an orgasm

Symptoms
Your mental state has a deep impact on your physical state. The effect of stress hormones norepinephrine and epinephrine can hinder your sexual performance. Symptoms of sexual performance anxiety include:

1. In men, blood vessels constrict due to the effect of stress hormones. This leads to reduced blood flow to the penis, thus making it difficult for the man to get an erection.

2. Often though it is less diagnosed in women, sexual performance anxiety leads to trouble in lubrication during sex. Lack of lubrication dims the desire to have sex.

Sexual performance anxiety is a vicious, inescapable cycle. Increased anxiety hampers you from having sex, making you think you won't be able to perform well, which causes even more anxiety.

Treatment
Consult a doctor you will be comfortable with discussing your problems. Sexual performance can be either treated by medication (if you have an underlying medical condition such as erectile dysfunction) or through therapy.

Talking to a therapist or counsellor about your problems can help you in several ways. You can learn to become more comfortable with yourself and your body. You can also understand your problems better, which can eliminate your anxiety.

All About Sexual Performance Anxiety

Knowing premature ejaculation - part 3: management and techniques (non-medical methods)

As shared in part 1and 2 of this series, because of premature ejaculation (pe), both the partners may end up experiencing highly unsatisfactory sex. In fact, it can increase anxiety, which may deteriorate the problem. 
Remember there is not a single magical drug or medicine in the chemist shop which can solve your problem overnight especially if you have chronic pe. Before seeking any medical treatment for pe, it is appropriate to consider the varied options for solving this issue. These include counseling with a sexual therapist, non- medical treatments like various exercises/ techniques and medical treatments including both modern and alternative medicine.

A. Counseling from an expert - sexual therapist or sexual medicine practitioner:
It is well understood that sex is in the mind. However, repeated pe/ failures can lead to lot of stress and disappointments. Anxiety due to pe itself is a big issue and can lead to recurrence of pe.
Reassurance from sexual therapist / counselor that pe is not a disease and can be easily treatable is relaxing for men who are facing this problem. So please share your detailed history and sexual habits with the expert. This may help the expert to guide you well.

B. Behavioral changes:

Some basic things may also help you to deal with the problem. 

1. Some men attempt to treat themselves for premature ejaculation by distracting themselves by thinking nonsexual thoughts (such as naming cricket players and records) to avoid getting excited too fast when approaching their partners. This helps them to focus their attention away from the sexual stimulation.

2. It is also suggested to men that they should relieve themselves of the sexual tension by ejaculating with self masturbation 1-2 hours before attempting sexual intercourse with their partner.

3. Using condoms is known to help in premature ejaculation in some men by decreasing sensation.

4. Women on top position usually helps to delay orgasm in men

 
C. Exercises &amp; techniques:

There are several exercise and techniques you can try sitting in your home.

1. The" stop and start" method:
This technique involves sexually stimulating the man by self until he feels like he is about to reach orgasm. Then he needs to stop the stimulation for about 20-30 seconds and then start it again. Repeat this pattern until the man wants to ejaculate. This can be continued for 10-15 minutes. At the end of say, 10th or 15th minute, continue stimulation until the man reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
2. The" squeeze" method:
 This technique involves sexually stimulating the man by self or by his partner until he recognizes that he is about to ejaculate. At that point, the man or his partner gently squeezes the end of the penis (where the glans penis meets the shaft) for at least 15 seconds. Stop sexual stimulation for about 60 seconds, and then start it again. The person or couple may repeat this pattern for at least 10-15 minutes. At the end of say, 10th or 15th minute, continue stimulation until the man reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
3. Practice breathing exercises 

Deep breathing can greatly help in controlling the arousal and tension that cause early ejaculation. Men must avoid shallow breathing as it can trigger premature ejaculation. Instead, what you should do is spend 5 seconds taking in a long deep breath; then hold it for 3 seconds and then exhale for the next 5 seconds. If you can do this for 5 minutes in the bedroom without pause then you can control premature ejaculation.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on'consult.

Knowing Premature Ejaculation - PART 3: Management and Techniques (Non-medical methods)

Contraceptives are generally drugs and devices, which are used to prevent pregnancy. A large number of contraceptives are available which allow the couple to enjoy sex without running the risk of unwanted pregnancies. The general categories of contraceptives are explained below:

Barrier Methods:
i. Male Condom: It is one of the most common forms of contraception. They are worn on the penis before sex is initiated. For safety purpose, a new condom should be used every time the person has sex.

ii. Female Condom: Much like male condoms, these are available at over-the-counter pharmacies without prescription. The condoms can be inserted to the vagina anytime within a period of 8 hours prior to sex.

iii. Diaphragm: This should be coated with a spermicide before sex and placed inside a woman's vagina so that the sperms are prevented from entering the uterus.

iv. Cervical Cap: These are used as replacements for diaphragms because some women may develop bladder infections such as cystitis while using it and these caps have lesser contact with the vagina.

Hormonal Methods:
The main implementation of hormonal changes to provide contraception is the pill. This is the most common form of female contraception available. It comes in two forms:
i. Combined contraceptive pill: Contains a combination of hormones such as progestin and oestrogen.
ii. Mini-pill: Contains only progestin: It is available only with the prescription of the doctor and should be used as per the prescription.

Intrauterine Devices
The intrauterine device (IUD) is a long-acting and reversible form of contraception for women. It is of two types: Copper IUD (contains copper) and Hormone-releasing IUDs (progestin hormone is released into the womb slowly). It is a small device that is fitted inside the womb and it provides contraception by facilitating the prevention of fertilization of the egg.

Sterilization
This is a lifelong option that is available for both men and women. In males, the procedure is known as vasectomy which basically ties and cuts off the tubes that carry the sperm.

In women, two forms of sterilization are available; surgical and non-surgical. Surgically, the fallopian tubes are cut and tied using small cuts in the belly so that the ovaries and uterus are not linked. Non-surgically, coils are inserted into the fallopian tubes so the resultant development of scars leads to complete blockage of the tubes.

Other forms of contraceptives include contraceptive patches, vaginal rings, contraceptive injections, spermicides and contraceptive implants.

Different Types of Contraceptives and Its Uses

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