Humans are social animals who thrive on reciprocality. It is in our basic nature to be socially courteous, and the word 'No' feels like a conflict that warns a potential relationship. Many of us tend to comply with every single request that is put forward to us by our peers, family, or at the workplace by our superiors. We choose to take up more jobs than we can efficiently handle and put unnecessary stress on ourselves even at the cost of our time and well-being. Must we always do that? 

Why is it so hard to say 'No'?

People have the notion that saying 'No' can come across as rude or uncaring. You may feel that you are letting someone down by turning down their request or risking a relationship. But, it has mostly to do with your self-confidence than your relationships with people. It may branch from overbearing parents, high expectations set by your peers and mentors or experiencing parenthood yourself and setting unreasonable standards for yourself. Childhood influences are usually the biggest cause of people always saying  yes  all the time.

People who have low self-confidence tend to value their own needs less than the needs of others. Saying 'No' feels rude, and no one wants to be impolite.

Well... saying 'No' does not mean you are being rude or disagreeable.

At the end of the day, it is more about how you say 'no', rather than just saying the word 'No'. Saying 'No' is about valuing and respecting your own time and priorities. 

How to start saying say 'No'?
If you want to take a step back and start saying 'No' to make sure your own needs are valued, here s what you need to do.

Refuse politely, when it seems not possible: Do not overcomplicate responses and try to be as simple in your responses as you can be. If you are asked to do something, and you want to say 'no', try to be polite in your body language and state that it is not convenient for you at the moment and that you would rather get back to it later.
Seek time before committing: The transition from saying  yes  all the time to saying no does take time! Start to give yourself more time and ask people to get back to you later. This way you can begin to build more self-confidence and learn to say no over time. This also allows you to evaluate your response instead of immediately saying yes or no to the person asking the favor or task.
Do not feel guilty: Deep down if you want to do a favor, you can go ahead with it, but you should also understand that it is okay to say no, and there is no need to associate guilt with it. You should set boundaries and allow people around you to understand how much favors they can ask you for instead of presenting you with an endless amount of favors from you.
Set your boundaries: Refusal does not amount to rejection as you have just as much right to say  no  as the person who is asking the favor from you. You are simply turning down a request, and in most situations, there is a middle ground for compromises where both you and the requester can be satisfied. If you have limited time to fulfill a request, let the person know and help out only as much as you can without overstepping your boundaries.
Bringing in these changes can help you be more self-confident, and at the same time enable you to say no when you need to without weighing yourself down with expectations and fear or rejection.

Simple Steps To Help You Say No!

Having a healthy brain is equally important as is staying physically fit. Good mental health is absolutely essential. Apart from regular exercises there are certain foods also which can help you to maintain good mental health. Below mentioned are few foods, essential for having a healthy brain-

Include fish in your diet- if you are a non- vegetarian then include oily fishes like salmon, sardines in your diet. These fishes are replete with omega -3 fatty acids, dha and epa. All these are essential for the brain to function efficiently.
Munch on nuts- nuts are rich sources of vitamin e. Vitamin e can help you prevent your brain from alzheimer's disease. Nuts are also beneficial for elderly people and can help them combat the problem of memory loss.
Keep preparations with green leafy vegetables on your menu- vegetables like cabbage; broccoli is abundant in anti-oxidants. Broccoli is also a good supplement for vitamin k. These help to develop your memory and also keep brain diseases like alzheimer's, dementia at bay.
Have a sweet tooth for blueberries- this fruit is rich in anti oxidants, vitamin c and k. It helps to deal with problems like memory loss, alzheimer's and dementia.
Add eggs to your breakfast menu- eggs are rich in choline and also protein. It acts as a very good food for developing a healthy brain.
Get addicted to avocadoes- avocadoes help to tackle problems like hypertension, blood pressure and also help in smooth flowing of blood. They also contain vitamin k and c which help in memory development.
Go for whole grains- whole grains like wheat flour, flour, oatmeal provide energy to your brain. They supply glucose and are thus considered to be very good brain foods.
The above mentioned foods are easily available and can help you to develop a healthy brain.


Foods for a Healthy Brain

Depression is a clinical, mental, and emotional condition that may give rise to feelings of hopelessness and chronic sadness. It slows down the way people process everyday activities and leads the patient to a sense of constant gloom and doom. It is a disabling mental condition as per who, and may be caused due to reasons like genetics, changes in the balance of hormones, stress, grief, trauma and prolonged, chronic physical ailments. Depression is also connected with food and nutrition. Do you want to know how? 
Read on to see the three ways in which food and depression are connected. 

1. Severity and duration: depression is a mental illness that signifies an imbalance in the hormones and the emotional faculties in the brain. Nutrition is the fuel that keeps the brain and body in prime working condition. When a depressive state sets in or becomes emotionally rooted, then nutritious eating and a proper diet take a back seat as the patient succumbs to a state where he or she is not concerned about the food intake. As a result, the brain and hormonal balance get further affected. This can have an adverse effect on the severity and the duration of the depressive mode, which makes it all a vicious cycle of sorts. Poor appetite, not having proper meals, skipping meals, eating junk, avoiding social settings where food will be served, and even emotional eating are all outcomes of depression too.

2. Eating disorders: many patients who have eating disorders often experience deep rooted and chronic depression. Since despondency and hopelessness are the main characteristics of depressive behaviour, the outcome is that the patient tries to behave in a way that seeks approval. And in all this, the patient usually thinks that he or she is not'good enough. In such a scenario, the patient may start trying out fad diets and eventually fall prey to eating disorders like bulimia that make the patient overeat and then vomit. These eating disorders usually come with phases of binge eating, throwing up, starving and then repeating the cycle again. Eating in secrecy is also a symptom of this condition.

3. Nutrition to fight depression: nutrition and proper food intake can build a sense of resilience by first of all improving the overall physical condition of the patient. This can take care of a lot of angst even as the minerals and vitamins travel to the brain for better functioning in the long run.

Ensure that you eat right as a part of your therapy for depression. This is as good as taking your medication on time!

Three Ways Depression Is Connected With Food

Trouble with speech arises from a number of issues in the brain or the nerves that are responsible for the control of the larynx, vocal cords and facial muscles. Muscular disorders end up affecting the teeth, mouth and jaws which in turn will invariably impair speech. Sometimes many of the health conditions are present since childbirth whereas others might occur because of infections, injury, tumors and metabolic diseases.
There are different kinds of speech disorders; they are -

Aphasia is the inability to comprehend language in any form (written, spoken) and generally takes place because of disturbances in the brain.
Dysarthria is the condition that makes articulation difficult for patients suffering from it. Symptoms associated with dysarthia are difficulty swallowing and slurred speech.
Spasmodic dysphonia makes speaking a difficult job because of recurrent muscle spasms. These muscles affected in this disorder control the vocal chords, and therefore your speaking ability.
As most of the cases of speech disorders start to show early on in childhood, how can you tell if your child needs speech therapy?
Here are five signs that you should keep an eye out for:

There is a distinctive lack in social mixing or interactions. Children who are not able to comprehend and effectively respond to what you say need to be evaluated.
By the time the baby is twelve months old, she or he would be able to create words. By the time they turn eighteen months old they are able to connect words. If the ability to create such words or make gestures or sounds are absent or are markedly reduced in your child then you need the help of a speech therapist.
Parents are capable of understanding what their child says by the time they turn one and a half to two years old. If this is not the case then you will have to seek the help of a therapist.
If your baby is nearly three years old and is still incapable of uttering simple words such as  Daddy sleep ,  mommy hungry  then you might need external help.
If your precious baby is significantly facing trouble with consonants such as  ma   ba ,  pa  at the age of two or is incapable of making sounds such as  k  or  g  then your child most likely has a speech disorder. You should get him evaluated at the earliest.

5 Telltale Signs That Your Child Needs Speech Therapy!!

Anger is good. It protects you. But intense, uncontrolled anger may destroy valuable relationships. Anger is a result of anxiety and fear. When we assume that our expectations will not be met, we become anxious. When we feel unsure about our own capabilities we become anxious. This anxiety creates fear. Anxiety comes from our beliefs. All beliefs can be modified.

Anger has lots of energy. Avoid arguments/confrontations when you are very angry. When you are very angry you are likely to use rough language which may damage your relations and you are likely to behave impulsively. All this you might regret later on. Following are a few techniques which will help you to manage your anger in difficult situations :

Sit down and have a glass of water, slowly. This will help you to calm down a little.
Avoid or go away from that room or situation. Tell the people concerned, that you are angry and would like to discuss it some other time.
Deep breathing exercises help a lot. Close your eyes, take 10 deep breaths, turn your attention towards your body. See what is happening to your body. Tell your body muscles to relax. If your heart is beating fast, if you are breathing fast, continue deep breathing, till it normalises.
Now understand what is making you angry. Understand your own anxiety and fear related to the issue.
Let the other person know how you are  feeling . Start your statements, I feel hurt/insulted/let down/neglected etc. when you do this , instead of saying  You hurt/neglect me . When you express your feeling in this manner, the other person does not feel blamed, which makes the other person more receptive.
Focus on the current issue, don t bring in past situations.
Tell the other person, what you want or expect, instead of telling what you do not want. E.G. Instead of saying  I don t want you to go out now , say  I would like you to stay at home today .
Listen carefully what the other person wants to tell you. Give others a chance to voice their opinions.
Make an eye contact and be firm but polite while communicating your point of view.
Understand everyone s responsibility in the situation. Try to see, what is your share in the problematic situation? Work on that.
Understand what change you want.
Have realistic expectations from others and also from yourself.

Anger Management - 12 Tips To Help You!

We all have mood swings, but not all mood swings have the same intensity. People who have extreme mood swings ranging from depression to manic highs are said to be suffering from bipolar disorder. These extreme moods are known as episodes and usually last for a few days of even a few weeks at a time. A person suffering from bipolar disorder could have an episode several times a year. This is a very common psychological problem and can affect both children and adults. Though it cannot be cured, this disease can be managed with medication.

There are no known causes for bipolar disorder but genetics may play an important role in triggering this disorder. Hence, if a parent or sibling suffers from this condition, you have a risk of developing it as well. An imbalance in the neurotransmitters in the brain may also play a part in the development of this condition. Stress or traumatic events like the loss of a loved one can also increase your risk of suffering from this condition.
Given that mood swings affect almost each one of us, bipolar disorder can be difficult to diagnose. Some of the things to look out for are:

Change in self-esteem
Unusual talkativeness or quietness
Being increasingly prone to distractions
Decreased need for sleep
Agitation
Recklessness in terms of spending decisions, relationships etc
It must be kept in mind that a person must display at least 4 of the above symptoms simultaneously to be diagnosed as bipolar. Also, none of these symptoms should be a result or side effect of any kind of medication, drugs, alcohol or other intoxicants.

There are four main types of bipolar disorder.

Bipolar I: In such cases, the person has at least one episode of elevated moods and associated abnormal behaviour in his or her life. This may be preceded or followed by depressive episodes.
Bipolar II: In these cases, the person must have suffered from at least one depressive episode. It is very similar to bipolar I except that in bipolar II the highs never reach the manic stage.
Rapid Cycling: Some people can have 4 or more manic and depressive episodes a year. In such cases, they are said to be rapid cycling. This condition affects 10-20% of bipolar cases.
Mixed Bipolar: Usually, bipolar patients show mood swings that alternate between manic and depressive moods. However, sometimes a person may experience both elation and depression simultaneously or in rapid succession of each other. These cases are known as mixed bipolar.
Once diagnosed, bipolar disorder can be managed with a combination of medication and psychotherapy. In some cases, electroconvulsive therapy may also be needed. 

Bipolar Disorder - Things You Must Know!

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