If someone in your family or your partner is suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder, your mental health is at stake too. You will have to take care of yourself and your emotional needs first. Life can be frustrating for you all the time. But, you need to identify your  feel good  activities and take some time out of your daily life to relax and calm down. Remember, you can succeed in the critical task of appeasing or pleasing your dear one with BPD, only when you are at peace with yourself first. Destress yourself to fight back the depression or emotional drainage caused by handling a BPD patient.

Here are few things that can help you have a better life while being in a relationship with a person suffering from BPD:

1. Don t isolate yourself: You must be in touch with people you like to be with. You need emotional support from friends and family to deal with life. Spending some quality time with friends and family members can add little happiness to your life. It will boost up your energy level to fight back the dark side of life. You must remember that you have a life as well.

2. Take care of your health: Sometimes, relatives of BPD patients forget to take care of their physical health. They forget basic stuffs like having proper meals, exercising, etc just because they are caught-up in a stressful relationship. But, remember you can help your loved one better only when you are physically fit.

3. Manage stress: Don t get anxious or depressed with the ongoing stress in your life. It will only add to your existing problems. Keep your nerves cool to have a better life for yourself as well as your sweetheart with BPD.

4. Believe in the 3c s formula: Well, it is a formula recommended by most of the mental health practitioners. Don t blame yourself for the irrational behaviour of your friend or dear one. The patient with BPD is solely responsible for his or her destructive behaviour or abnormal outburst. You will have to remember these 3c s: I didn't cause it; I can't cure it; and I can't control it.

5. Careful communication: You have to be very careful while communicating with BPD patients. Don t argue or try to convince them, when they are already in a disturbed frame of mind or agitated. They might end up getting destructive. Listen to their words carefully and patiently. Occasional nodding in between a conversation is advisable to let them feel assured about the fact that they are being heard and understood.

Don t forget to acknowledge their feelings. It is also important that you stay calm when the patient is angry and has turned destructive.

How to Deal with a Person Suffering from Borderline Personality?

Deepika and Ranbir show you how to manage relationships against all odds

Relationships may or may not always pan out the way you expect them to. Be it with a friend, family member or your partner, certain relationships may end up getting bitter over time. The reasons for this may be tensions in the relationship, break-ups, lack of compatibility, infidelity, lack of attention to details, over familiarity and so on. Although such incidents may scar you forever, it is always possible to mend your relationships, if you intend to.

The first thing you can do is to try to build a new friendship, whether it’s with your ex-lover or anyone else  you may have had a fall-out with. Take for example, the former couple- Ranbir Kapoor and Deepika Padukone. These Bollywood celebrities have flawlessly transitioned from being ex-lovers to being good friends.

So how did they do it?
Through 3 simple ways Ranbir and Deepika were able to heal the past and forge a new and meaningful relationship:

1. They kept it formal while setting boundaries

Ranbir and Deepika comfortably worked with each other in several movies as on-screen lovers with no insecurities. The reason they were able to do this was because they had set clear emotional boundaries.
Being secure is essential for you to stop yourself from reliving the past. Setting clear boundaries may help you in accepting that things are different now and the relationship has changed. Both the concerned people must respect each other’s decisions in order to have cordial relations and not be uncomfortable in the other’s presence.

2. They accepted the differences between them

Ranbir and Deepika were only successful in maintaining a cordial relationship because they had embraced each other’s differences rather than attempting to change each other.
You can only do this by giving yourself a little time. You can personally try to accept how every individual has a set of distinct characteristics and then try to respect and accept them for it.

3. They were polite and lived in the present

Even after having a checkered history together Ranbir and Deepika chose to remain courteous and amicable towards one another. They only focused on the present scenario, instead of mulling over past grievances - The biggest reason why they are on such good terms.
You should try to forget the past and hope for an improved future. Whether you meet at a social or an official gathering, you must hold your ground, be professional and courteous towards the concerned person. Participating in loose gossip about the individual or acting petty doesn’t reflect well on your personality.
Also, living in the past is a sign of an unhealthy state of mind. Learn to let go, and move on.

By learning from the real-life example of Deepika and Ranbir, you too can balance all your relationships well, no matter what happens.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'Consult'.

Lessons from Deepika and Ranbir on How to Manage Relationships Against All Odds

While most of us consume alcohol on a social basis, or during certain special and momentous events of our life, there are some people who may be classified as heavy drinkers. There is a certain alcohol limit as per the sex, age and climate that a person can have on a daily basis. When a person overshoots that limit on a daily basis and that too by a large margin, he or she may be known as a heavy drinker. 

If you fall in this heavy drinking category, then you may want to go through the following tips in order to bring down and curb your habit so that you can drink in moderation, without causing undue problems for your mental and physical health.

Use bitters: Using bitters, especially digestive bitters, with your drinks can help in bringing down the amount of alcohol that you consume in one go. This can also help your body in digesting the alcohol in a better manner so that you do not wake up with a hangover. Also, the use of digestive bitters can help in detoxification of the liver and prevent it from getting coated with toxins released by alcohol.
Water: It is a well-known fact that one must stay hydrated while drinking so that he/she does not get carried away and drink too much. You can easily have a glass of water between each drink so that you keep the buzz at a stable level rather than letting it get to your head, to a point where you start to ask for even more alcohol. Moreover, before a big party or event, it is best to first have plenty of water so that you do not end up going overboard.
Cleansing juices: The latest diet and fitness fad includes a dose of juices churned from various kinds of fruit and vegetables. You can also try this cleansing juice menu every time you feel like reaching out for a drink. This will help you in keeping things in perspective and then drinking moderately, if and when the need arises.
Set a drink deadline: If you want to cut back on your drinks significantly, then one of the best things to do is to set yourself a drink deadline. As per this deadline, you will set a number where you will stop. For instance, once you have reached 2 to 3 drinks, you will automatically stop so that you do not binge.
Find a support group: It is best to find a support group of friends or even an alcoholic anonymous group so that you can share your experiences and find motivation at the same time. This is especially important for those going through withdrawal symptoms.

Are You A Heavy Drinker? 5 Tips to Help You Drink in Moderation!

Alzheimer s disease is one of the most severe forms of dementia that is, memory loss which also comes with other disorders such as reduced muscle movement. A patient with the Alzheimer s disease practically forgets even the most basic day-to-day activities and hence, the disease interrupts the lives of people suffering from it and the ones who are related to them. A commonly observed pattern in the patients suffering from the Alzheimer s disease is that most of them are aged 60 years and beyond. In simple words, it is the death of the brain cells, that is, the nerve cells which causes the memory loss at first and then the cognitive decline of other bodily functions.

Symptoms:

A patient of the Alzheimer s disease might show one or more of the following mentioned symptoms. Read the symptoms carefully and help identify the symptoms if you see them in anyone in your surroundings. Most people mistake this symptom to be something else which causes a delay in the diagnosis. But if the disorder is diagnosed at an early stage it might help people survive, or at least have a little longer until their memory stays intact. Therefore, it is of utmost importance to know about the symptoms that are given below:

The inability to remembering the information 
Repeating questions or actions
Unable to find the way on a rather regularly visited road
The decrease in decision-making ability
Poor judgment
Unable to solve complex puzzles or do tough activities
Unable to recognize familiar people such as colleagues and relatives
Unable to dress up properly
Inability in speaking mother tongue or word formation
Uncontrollable mood swings
Rude and un-empathetic social behavior such as being outspoken
They will be unable to maintain their own finances unlike before.
Stages of Alzheimer s disease
It is not unknown a fact when someone says that detecting a disease at an early stage is beneficial than at a later stage. The reason being that if a disease is detected earlier, there are more chances of treating it successfully, or in case of the Alzheimer s disease there are more chances of a medication to work on slowing down the adverse effects of the disease since there is no permanent cure available for it. Therefore, it is of utmost importance that one is aware of the early onset of the disease and also, the symptoms to make a quick diagnosis. The disease affects people between the age of 30 and 60, generally, the symptoms begin at the very early age of 30 but they do not become persistent before reaching a later-on stage. The three stages are:

Preclinical when the individual hasn t recorded any symptoms
The beginning with mild symptoms
Complete dementia

Alzheimer's Disease - Know Its Symptoms!

You might be feeling that spending time on any social media network is a simple way to pass time and is a common habit. But a recent study by University of Chicago Booth School of Business says that social networking sites can be more addictive, than alcohol. The desire to consume alcohol can be controlled and turned down, but the desire to check Facebook is simply uncontrollable for most people, and it s a serious addiction.

About the study
The ground breaking study was done on 250 people in and around Germany aged between 18 and 85 years of age. They were sent messages at specific intervals to report their desires and cravings. It is found that most people had the desire to sleep and have sex during the day that they were able to control. But the desire for checking Facebook was much higher.

Reasons for Facebook addiction

One of the major reasons is that availability of Facebook is much easier and higher than alcohol availability.
Also, it is thought that the cost of checking Facebook is much less than consuming some amount of alcohol on a regular basis.
Even if a man wants to resist his desire, but due to easy availability and lesser cost, he is prone to use it again and again.
Alcohol consumption is prohibited in public and during office hours in many countries. But checking Facebook updates have no restrictions. People can check it whenever they feel the desire.
The most shocking part is the urges drove the people to such an extent, that they couldn t even resist themselves even if they wanted to do so.
Effects of Facebook addiction

Drainage of time: No matter how good we feel while checking Facebook updates, can you deny that it s simply a waste of time?
Self esteem reduced: When you see your peers enjoying their life with flying colors, no wonder you will feel depressed. But we are reluctant to believe this fact, that nobody shows his tragic part of life on Facebook. So, whom you think is the happiest person in the world, may be the saddest and is drowned in his own miseries.
Remedy of this so called addiction
The study says that when we are much worn out, we are unable to control our desire and our will power is depleted.

So, if you find yourself posting your status on Facebook at the midnight instead of sleeping, then it is high time you should try to come out of this addiction and give yourself a better life and health.

Facebook Vs Alcohol - Which Is More Addictive?

Is someone close to you into drugs? Are you concerned about him or her having a drug problem? There are several patterns of drug abuse, which help you to determine the extent of drug abuse a person is undergoing. It is important for you to recognize your dear ones  drug use patterns and analyse whether you need to take further steps. The different drug abuse patterns are classified as follows:

Hard drug use
Hard drugs like cocaine, heroin, and methamphetamine are considered to be the most dangerous in terms of their harmful effects on health and behavior.
They are associated with risks of addiction. Most people start with such drugs recreationally, but addiction can set in very quickly.
People engaging in hard drugs are subjected to high risk behavior. They usually become isolated and live in their own world, away from society.
Frequent drug use
The frequency of drug abuse is not good enough for determining, if a person is addicted.
People engaging themselves in binge drinking during weekends can have serious issues in spite of not drinking every day.
Frequent drug use indicates a person s drug tolerance and dependence. A person who drinks or uses drugs regularly is quite likely to continue this pattern.
Early drug use
People who start taking drugs from early adolescence are at an enhanced risk of developing drug problems in their adulthood.
The earlier a child gets into drugs, the sooner they become addicts.
During adolescence, a person s body and brain still undergo development and any kind of drug-related consequences may be quite severe.
Drug use from an early age is quite a common phenomenon.
Solitary drug use
Teenagers who use marijuana, cigarettes and alcohol while they are alone are at a higher risk of developing drug problems later in life.
They are quite likely to have poor physical health by the age of 23, compared to social drug users.
Solitary drug use is also quite a common aspect that prevails.
Escapist drug use
The reasons for using alcohol and drugs vary from person to person.
People who use drugs for coping with stress, medicating anxiety or depression, and building self-esteem are prone to becoming addicts.
Teens using substances for coping with boredom and grief are highly subjected to drug problems.
A lot of people drink on some occasions, and try some substance just for the sake of experimenting. However, when the substance starts affecting your career, relationships and activities, a pattern of drug use is recognized. These patterns increase the risk of addiction, no matter how many months, years or weeks a person is engaged in them.

Drug Abuse - Understanding The Pattern!

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