Is depression eating you up from within? are you facing severe emotional meltdown? emotional disturbances can ruin your life and this is why you have to look for the best preventive ways. You can have a consultation with any counsellor so that you can share your problems. Your counsellor will definitely help you to get some potential way out. 

Best ways for preventing emotional meltdown:

 Detecting the signs: the actual signs of emotional meltdown need to be detected and then only you can get rid of the same. Both your facial expressions and behavioural changes are to be observed carefully as these will help you to detect the signs. If you are remaining silent for most of the times, then there is something going on in your mind for sure. 
 Early intervention: you should rely on your intuition or sixth sense so that you can sense the troubles you are going to face. You should have a good observation power so that you can sense things easily. Remain quiet and calm so that you can take the right decisions. 
 Living well: you need to choose a completely healthy way of living, otherwise you will never get freedom from emotional troubles. Do not think much about past incidents, rather you should look forward so that you can go ahead. You should develop only positive mentality in order to discharge your duties in a perfect manner. Remain happy and keep everybody happy and then only you will be able to get the actual essence of life. Healthy eating and good habits are also needed so that your life can become more lively and refreshing. 
 Have proper communication: if you think that your friends or family members are pretty reliable, then you can openly communicate with them. This would help you to get mental relief and relaxation. If you open up your emotions and share them with anybody, then you will feel relaxed and your mind will be calm at all times. 
 Have counselling: it is not always possible to share all your secrets with your loved ones and this is the reason you have to look for the most reliable option. You can go for thorough counselling, and this can help you to get rid of depressing thoughts and other mental troubles. In this case, you have to look for the best counsellor in your locality so that you can disclose all your hidden secrets.

How to Prevent an Emotional Meltdown?

HOW TO BOUNCE BACK FROM FAILURE

“It's fine to celebrate success, but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure,” Bill Gates said. We always shower praise on those who have triumphed. Very rarely do we examine all the times the successful people have failed, and analyze how they turned their “luck” around. In this tip, you will understand how to turn failure into success and bounce back with more fervour.

1. A SUCCESSFUL MINDSET: If you’re striving to achieve anything then failure is inevitable. “Whenever you’re trying a new experiment, whether it’s a new job, a new product, a new hobby, a new boyfriend or girlfriend–whatever it is–you need to give some thought to what is your strategy and which are the possible ways to achieve it. Do you have any plan B or plan C if plan A fails? What will you do if nothing works out...and how to minimise the losses as well as taking advantage of the opportunities that you have. Assessing your opportunities and threats to success is very important. When a newly wedded girl comes to stay with her In laws, she might need to have a number of ways in her kitty to make her place in the new household rather than just stick to a few traditional ones. If one technique doesn't work, try something else. Disaster strikes when creativity is not given a place and failure was not factored in. Feeling helpless doesn't add upto success. Optimism is what people need to bounce back with.

2. LEARN AND IMPROVE WITH EACH FAILURE: Failure is just an opportunity to learn and improve. It’s a teaching moment that should be analyzed with a practical, clear mind. It helps to see mistakes as stepping stones to learning and improving and using it as an opportunity to bounce back. Every person should behave like a scientist with a mind open to exploring, assessing, making mistakes and changing. Mistakes must be embraced as being part of the process of success. If we don’t make mistakes it means that we’re not trying, and if we’re not trying then we’re not learning and getting better. Your self-worth should not rest on perfectionism, but rather value your ability to accept and learn from your mistakes. Not everyone is willing to admit when they’re wrong, which can hamper progress and relationships. When Meena and Arun started dating each other, they didn't know each other well and tried to impress each other in ways that was not working out well for both of them. It was very frustrating for them to see that their relationship was not working out. In counselling, they realised that they were not asking what each can do to impress the other. Meena told Arun that she would like to be taken out to plays and theatre by her future partner and Arun told Meena that he would like to take weekend trips to nearby destinations to get to know his partner well. When they both started doing what the other appreciated, they got to know each other better and relationship started blooming. Thus Arun and Meena assessed the situation, were open to discussion and found an amicable solution instead of thinking of their previous efforts as failure and giving up. 

3. LOVE YOUR CRITICS: How do you feel when your work gets criticised repeatedly by your boss, manager or your husband. It mighty be hurtful and demeaning to hear critical feedback, but if many people are saying the same things about your work or behaviour, then maybe it's time to give it a serious thought. When Saira was often told that she wasn't cooperative enough in team activities and tends to slacken and pass on work to other members, her mind started working. She had got the same comments in her previous organisations. She started seeing a grain of truth in this feedback and took steps to rectify complaints that stood out common in all the feedbacks and reworked her way back to become a sought after team member. Her next years' appraisal was better and got her an increment. Saira triumphed, because she knew how to learn from criticism.

4. ACCEPT FAILURE AS AN IMPORTANT PART OF LIFE: Shivani was heartbroken when her 15 year old perfect son started doing badly in exams. Her world fell apart when she came to know that he had secured 73% in 10th grade. She felt that she had failed as a parent and her son as she had not devoted enough time to her son as she was a working mother. In counselling, she was asked if she knew any parent who had never failed their kids and were always there for them. Shivani couldn't come up with any names of such mothers who had been perfect to the core. Yes, that's how real mothers are...you will fail sometimes and you will win sometimes. Every moment you are real with your child, you are succeeding as a mother. Accepting failure as a part of life and knowing that you gave it your best shot is good enough. There's magic in feeling genuine regret rather than overkilling guilt and shame. Own your failure openly, publicly, and you'll reap a harvest of forgiveness, trust, respect, and connection—the things you thought you'd get by succeeding. Ironic, isn't it?

5. GO WITH YOUR GUT: When you see a red flag, pay attention. How many times in life have you kicked yourself for not listening to that little voice in your head that says, “Something is wrong here”?. Preetam gave an interview with an organisation, going by their market reputation. Yet during the interview, he picked up feelings of dissonance within the company. After joining them, he realised that his gut was right..the company was going through major shuffle and policy changes, which were not working out for Preetam.

6. BE A PROBLEM SOLVER AND STAY CALM: In a crisis, people tend to get anxious. Maintaining a sense of Zen will not only allow you to think more clearly but will also set the tone for those around you. Kapil used to get tensed over small details. He realised that in the larger scheme of things they were really not that important. He focussed his energies on things that were more important for him to reach his monthly targets. This started calming him down.

7. FIND A SOLUTION: You need to figure out how to address and remedy the situation. Start by considering your end game — what’s the ultimate outcome you’d like to see? — and work backwards from there. Daya wanted to be a good father to his children. He wanted them to remember him as a gentle and loving father. He started working backwards and his daily actions and behaviours showed to his children that Daya was a loving father. He played with them, took them for cricket coaching, went swimming, shared personal success and failures and most of all listened to them when they had to say something.

8. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY OF YOUR MISTAKES AND FAILURES: If you screwed up, don’t make excuses — just apologise genuinely for any errors on your part. Remember, that no one is perfect and it's human to err. Prema was a caring mother. She had many dreams about her daughter and wanted her to do well in studies and be a well behaved child of the family. But when her daughter started showing disinterest in studies and marks started falling, Prema used to beat up her daughter in her anxiety to do well. In counselling Prema understood that her intentions were good, but the way she communicated were not helping the situation as Prema's daughter hated her mother and maintained distance. Prema owned up her mistakes and apologised for her errors to her daughter. She also took remedial action to be accepting of her daughter and gave her the space to make her own mistakes and learn from them. 

9. BECOME PROACTIVE: Don’t let a small mistake linger and turn into a bigger one. That’s not to say you should simply be reactive, but i f you know you did something wrong, deal with it right away. Say, for example, you stuck your foot in your mouth during an important business meeting and inadvertently offended your boss or a client. Acknowledge the gaffe, apologize and try to move on without beating yourself up. Remember that, “In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.

10. DEFINE YOUR OWN SUCCESS AND FAILURES: Its important to have your own definition of both rather than how the world sees and defines success and failure. Find answers to questions like: How would you be behaving when you have succeeded, what must happen to feel successful, how will your life change when you are successful? Every person has a very different view and definition for success and making it your own definition can spell failure. Don't let the world tell you whether you have failed or succeeded. It's also excellent for self esteem and works as a protective shield from potential damage. 

So, next time there’s that misstep, mistake or misunderstanding, remember to take a deep breath and be your own best publicist by remaining calm, seeking the solution and seeing the challenge as an opportunity to lead and learn.









How To Bounce Back From Failure - Tips From A Pyschologist

Humans are social animals who thrive on reciprocality. It is in our basic nature to be socially courteous, and the word 'No' feels like a conflict that warns a potential relationship. Many of us tend to comply with every single request that is put forward to us by our peers, family, or at the workplace by our superiors. We choose to take up more jobs than we can efficiently handle and put unnecessary stress on ourselves even at the cost of our time and well-being. Must we always do that? 

Why is it so hard to say 'No'?

People have the notion that saying 'No' can come across as rude or uncaring. You may feel that you are letting someone down by turning down their request or risking a relationship. But, it has mostly to do with your self-confidence than your relationships with people. It may branch from overbearing parents, high expectations set by your peers and mentors or experiencing parenthood yourself and setting unreasonable standards for yourself. Childhood influences are usually the biggest cause of people always saying  yes  all the time.

People who have low self-confidence tend to value their own needs less than the needs of others. Saying 'No' feels rude, and no one wants to be impolite.

Well... saying 'No' does not mean you are being rude or disagreeable.

At the end of the day, it is more about how you say 'no', rather than just saying the word 'No'. Saying 'No' is about valuing and respecting your own time and priorities. 

How to start saying say 'No'?
If you want to take a step back and start saying 'No' to make sure your own needs are valued, here s what you need to do.

Refuse politely, when it seems not possible: Do not overcomplicate responses and try to be as simple in your responses as you can be. If you are asked to do something, and you want to say 'no', try to be polite in your body language and state that it is not convenient for you at the moment and that you would rather get back to it later.
Seek time before committing: The transition from saying  yes  all the time to saying no does take time! Start to give yourself more time and ask people to get back to you later. This way you can begin to build more self-confidence and learn to say no over time. This also allows you to evaluate your response instead of immediately saying yes or no to the person asking the favor or task.
Do not feel guilty: Deep down if you want to do a favor, you can go ahead with it, but you should also understand that it is okay to say no, and there is no need to associate guilt with it. You should set boundaries and allow people around you to understand how much favors they can ask you for instead of presenting you with an endless amount of favors from you.
Set your boundaries: Refusal does not amount to rejection as you have just as much right to say  no  as the person who is asking the favor from you. You are simply turning down a request, and in most situations, there is a middle ground for compromises where both you and the requester can be satisfied. If you have limited time to fulfill a request, let the person know and help out only as much as you can without overstepping your boundaries.
Bringing in these changes can help you be more self-confident, and at the same time enable you to say no when you need to without weighing yourself down with expectations and fear or rejection.

Simple Steps To Help You Say No!

Suffering from depression - Avoid these

Depression is a psychological condition that can drain your hope, energy and drive. The things that you once rejoiced might not be pleasurable anymore. Meanwhile, overcoming depression isn't quick or easy and it is recommended that you opt for counselling or professional support to help you through. At the same time, you need to avoid these practices, which tend to increase the intensity of depressive symptoms.

These are the things you should avoid while suffering from depression.

1. Avoid Staying Alone: When you are depressed, you might not feel pleasure in things you used to enjoy earlier. This might result in social isolation, making you lonelier and more depressed than ever. But living in social situations, meeting people will actually help you. It can take off your mind from the feelings of depression and while meeting people might not seem as enjoyable as it did before, it can certainly help in overcoming the feelings of loneliness.

2. Avoid NOT Seeking Help: Most of the people are unable to differentiate between sadness and depression. But if you are someone who has been feeling intensely sad for no reason, then you are probably depressed. So, don't avoid seeking help. Approach a therapist, even online if you want more confidentiality and privacy. A counsellor can actually help in overcoming the feeling of depression.

3. Avoid White Foods: Processed foods or white foods are simple carbohydrates that can actually lead to insulin dumping and trigger the process of depression. The surge of insulin will initially make you feel happier, but once that's surge goes down, you will begin to feel depressed again. This will even trigger hunger and particular cravings, which in turn affect depression symptoms negatively.

4. Products with Aspartame: Aspartame can lower the production of serotonin, a neurotransmitter that's associated with mood. Therefore, eating aspartame can increase the intensity of your depression symptoms, may result in insomnia as well.



Do You Feel DEPRESSED Often? Stay Away from These 4 Things!

How to brush off stress from your life

Current lifestyle is such that stress becomes inevitable. But you might be aware how disastrous stress can be, it does take control of our lives. What one needs to consciously do is, take steps to address the stress that they are under. 
Here are simple and effective ways to do it.

1) indulge in physical activities - most of us have sedentary lifestyles which add to stress. While indulging in workouts won't take away your stress, what will happen is that there will be clarity in your thoughts, and your emotional intensity will come down, calming you.
2) believe every problem has a solution - it is easy to be scared of the problem and let it take control of your mind &amp; your life. Take control of them. Try to actively address your problem and look for solutions. When you act towards solving your problem, irrespective of the solution, your mind has more positive in it than stress.
3) give it away - meet people, socialize, and connect with other lives. This is actually going to solve half your problem. Not only will more things occupy your mind, and you will know of other people's problems too, but at times, sharing your stress problem warranties a quick solution!
4) treasure yourself - take some time for yourself and do what you love to do the most. Go to the spa, go shopping, read or just sleep. But make sure you have time away from work and daily chores, where you can rejuvenate your sense by doing what makes you the happiest. If nothing, meet up with friends.
5) indulge in volunteering work - helping others not only preoccupies your mind with problems of others rather than staying immersed in your own, but also helps you be more resilient. You will come out stronger and with more will to address your own issues.
6) try to stay positive all the time - appreciate what you have rather than concentrate on what you don't. Be thankful.
7) accept what you cannot change - however much we try to solve our problems, some things we cannot resolve right at the time. And there is no point in pondering over them. Accept that this is how things will be, and move on.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on'consult.

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How To Brush Off Stress From Your Life

The risk of developing depression is found by the means of various researches to be two to three times higher in individuals suffering from a chronic disease than in normal individuals. Type 1 and type 2 Diabetes are chronic diseases that can prove to be very challenging to manage due to various setbacks and complications that can come in the way. Regular monitoring of the blood sugar levels is essential in managing the blood sugar. Navigation of the health care facilities, side effects caused by medications, and other related health conditions or even diabetic complications can cause an increased risk of developing depression. If left undiagnosed and untreated, depression can give way to a poor lifestyle choice that can further deteriorate the physical health of a person. 

Various risk factors that are associated with diabetes and depression are as follows- 

lack of physical activity
poor social environment
poverty
stress during pregnancy
Depression in diabetes can occur simultaneously due to a variety of factors. These include the psychological and psychosocial impact of the disease on an individual, a potential common genetic susceptibility and certain common pathophysiological abnormalities that involve neuro-immunological and neuro-endocrinal pathways, as well as microvascular brain lesions due to diabetes mellitus. However, issues concerning pathogenesis and causality of this high co-occurrence are not fully determined yet. Still, the presence of depression in patients with diabetes mellitus is of vast importance, as it is usually associated with poor disease control, adverse health outcomes and quality of life impairment.

When an individual is suffering from diabetes, the awareness of risks of developing depression is essential. It has been widely researched and found that these two conditions can occur simultaneously, where depression is usually undiagnosed. Diabetes, specifically type 2, and depression affect each other in a bi-directional manner, which means that each of the disease can prove as a risk factor for the other. In a state of depression, it is common for a person to consume high calorie foods and also to lead a sedentary lifestyle. This tendency can prove to be a risk factor for developing type 2 diabetes. 

If an individual already has type 2 diabetes, the stress experienced during the management of disease can cause depression. Type 1 diabetes develops as result of the defect of pancreas in production of insulin. 

People with type 1 diabetes can also develop depressive symptoms due to difficulties in the management of the disease. If the symptoms of depression develop in the patient already suffering from diabetes, management of diabetes also becomes difficult. This can lead to cause various diabetes related complications and also decrease the life expectancy. 

Various signs that can be observed in a state of depression are as follows: 

Complete lack of interest in doing any activity
Irritation or mood swings
Depressed mood
Disturbed sleep pattern
Changes in the appetite
Constant feeling of despair
Guilt Fatigue, weakness
Difficulty in concentration, transient memory loss
Suicidal tendency
There is a certain risk observed between the consumption of antidepressant medicines and development of diabetes. It has been researched and concluded that consuming antidepressants should always be on physician recommendation, with a prior advice on the risks of developing diabetes. It has also been found that the people with type 2 diabetes, who are using insulin regularly, are at higher risk for developing depression as compared to the people on non-insulin medications or following only diet or lifestyle modification habits. An additional stress experienced in managing diabetes and accessing the health care services can cause such complication in insulin users. 

Common treatment protocol for depression includes psychotherapy or the cognitive behavioral therapy. It helps people to correct destructive thought patterns and behaviors that tend to increase the depressive symptoms. Other interventions like a structured problem solving approach, motivational interviewing, and interpersonal approach towards the patient is also effective in management. Certain medications can also help in mood-lifting and the management of symptoms of depression.

In diabetics, the treatment options that are available in addition to the standard medical healthcare provision includes self-management training sessions that help the people to increase healthy habits and improve control on their blood sugar levels. Diabetes as well as depression can improve with complete focus on lifestyle changes, like proper diet management and exercising regularly.

How Diabetes Can Lead To Depression?

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