Top 4 Ways You Can Increase Your Willpower

There are days when you wake up but you don’t want to move out of the bed. When your alarm goes off and you open your eyes feeling groggy and disoriented.Times when you accept defeat and stop moving towards what you want to achieve in life. These are just indicators of being low on motivation and lacking will power to chnage things. It’s more psychological than physical. Follow these simple tips, to come out of your cocoon and boost your willpower. 

Try these four ways to up your willpower.

1) Meditate - Meditation is the key to unleashing your powers, especially willpower. Practicing mindfulness, even for few minutes a day can help in boosting your willpower.

2) Exercise - The magic pill of exercise is another best way to boost your willpower. It is recommended that you exercise for 30 minutes, at least three times a week to ensure that you feel fitter, reduce your anxiety levels and boost your overall willpower to achieve bigger and better things in life.

3) Hold yourself accountable - That’s one of the best ways to boost your willpower. If you hold yourself accountable in your own life, if you know that those reasons of not getting out of the bed are mere excuses, then you would certainly increase your willpower.

4) Set Goals - One of the reasons why people experience a faltering in their will power is the fact that they don’t set their goals. Setting definitive targets is a must.You must ensure that the goal is set with measurable quantities, is specific, attainable, relevant and timely. All of this will certainly help you in enhancing your willpower.

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Top 4 Ways You Can Increase Your Willpower

Borderline personality disorder (bpd) is a mental illness. A patient suffering from bpd maintains unstable relationships with other people, shows inappropriate emotional reactions and possesses suicidal or self-harm tendencies. It is purely a personality disorder caused due to multiple factors. Patients suffering from bpd may find it difficult to stay alone. They fear abandonment and loneliness. Yet they have a tendency of showing mood swings, sudden emotional outburst or anger and hostility. This prevents them from having a long lasting relationship in life.

It usually starts affecting the patient's life from early adulthood. It however seems to improve with age. The patient also has distorted self-image. He or she is unclear about what they want from life or what they are in reality. Even minor incidents can trigger intense reactions in people with bpd.

Symptoms of borderline personality disorder.

The signs of suffering from bpd are listed below:

Intense and frantic effort to avoid abandonment or loneliness
Unstable relationships with people and changing the attitude towards them drastically. It can change from being in immense love with each other to intense hatred.
Developing paranoid thoughts and having dissociative feelings-the patient often lacks the feeling of self and suffers from identity crisis.
Suicidal feelings and attempts
Tendency to cause self harm or destruction by drug abuse, driving irresponsibly or be having unprotected sex
Reflecting intense depression
Chronic boredom
Sudden anger and hostility
Causes for borderline personality disorder.

Borderline personality disorder can be caused due to multiple reasons. Usually it has been found by researchers that it occurs to patients who have had a disturbed childhood. Complex and unpleasant happenings in the childhood may leave a deep impact on the patient's personality, which comes back as a disorder in his or her early adulthood. From mental, physical to sexual abuse in the childhood can lead to this condition in adults.

Besides, researchers have discovered recently that this illness has hereditary links. Some genes may be responsible for bpd. Improper functioning of the brain is also another factor. Especially, the portion of brain that controls emotions might not be functioning properly in co-ordination with other parts of it.

Diagnosis.

There is no particular clinical test that can diagnose bpd. It can be diagnosed by a series of interactive session with the patient by a psychiatrist.

Treatment.

The treatment of bpd involves three steps- psychotherapy, medications and support from peer and family. Dialectical behavioral therapy, cognitive behavioural therapy and psychodynamic psychotherapy are used in treating the patient. There are no specific medicines to cure identity crisis, boredom and loneliness. However, other symptoms like mood swings, depression and anxiety can be treated with anti-depressants and mood stabilizers. Antipsychotic drugs are also helpful to a certain extent. In extreme cases, hospitalization may be needed.

A Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a type of personality disorder characterized by an ongoing pattern of varying moods, self-image and behaviour. This often results in impulsive actions and problems in relationships and at work. You may experience intense episodes of various emotions like anger, depression and anxiety that may last for a few hours to a few days.

Diagnosis of BPD
If you experience the following 10 symptoms for a long time or if they have had a huge impact on your daily life, you may say that you are suffering from BPD:

Feeling of being abandoned. You feel that people may abandon you and are constantly worried about that. You would do anything to stop it.
Frequent mood swings. You experience intense emotions that last from a few hours to a few days. E.g. You suddenly start feeling low and depressed after feeling very happy and confident for a while.
Lack of identity. You don t know who you are and do not have a strong sense of your being.
Unable to sustain relationships. You find it very hard to retain relationships and make new ones.
You feel empty from within all the time.
Make impulsive decisions and show sudden reactions. You do things to harm yourself like binge eating, drug abuse or driving dangerously.
You inflict pain on yourself or have suicidal feelings.
You have anger issues which are very difficult to control.
You get paranoid or dissociate when you re stressed.
You experience all your emotions very intensely be it anger, happiness or sadness.
Self-Care - How can you help yourself?
If you start feeling overwhelmed, focus on one feeling at a time. It will help channelize your energy and thoughts into finding a solution for that emotion. Different therapies help different people at different times. You are the best judge to decide what benefits you the most.

Follow these tips to get through the various emotions that you may experience.

When you are angry and frustrated
Rip a newspaper
Hit a pillow
Listen to your favourite music
Go for a walk or do some vigorous exercise
When you are depressed and lonely
Wrap yourself in a blanket and watch your favourite movie or TV show.
Write all the negative feelings on a piece of paper and tear the paper.
Use positive affirmations to comfort yourself.
Cuddle a pillow/pet/soft toy
When you are tensed and anxious 
Try to shift your focus to something else like music, yoga or meditation.
Take a deep breath, use relaxation techniques and focus on your breaths.
Take a warm bath to help soothe your mood.
When you want to harm yourself
Rub ice over the parts where you want to hurt yourself.
Take a cold-water bath to cool yourself.



Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) - Tips To Help You Diagnose The Problem!

Every person is familiar with the remark  Stop fidgeting  but does anybody ever wonder why do humans fidget? Is there any scientific reason for such an action? This article will throw light on the underlying causes for what is known as fidgeting.

Fidgeting and its underlying causes

Scientific research has revealed that fidgeting has many benefits still most people get annoyed when they see another person twitching and tapping. Most people do this seemingly without any control over their movement when they are ordered to be still. Research shows that there is at least one biological reason to back this action.
Since the same brain area is used for movement and speech, it is only natural that gestures are interlinked with thorough preparation for a speech. People tend to move their hands more when they are looking for a word to say, but are not being able to find it. In a recent study, it was found that school children between the age of 6-8 years who use their hands a lot can come up with the right answers during lessons.
While this is one theory, another neurological theory suggests that a portion of the mental load is off-loaded through the process of fidgeting when people have to tackle complex problems or thoughts. The theory is called cognitive load hypothesis. The offloading mechanism frees up the mental faculties thus, devoting them to the mental process. While this may not be a definitive explanation for fidgeting, it does go to show that there is a link between a person s hand movements and their thought and speech process.
Other reasons for fidgeting

Other than the cognitive advantages, some evidence has also been found linking fidgeting with metabolism. People who fidget are found to have a higher metabolism and lower BMI. This difference can be seen between thin and overweight people. Fidgeting amidst lollygagging during the day helps burn up to 350 calories a day. Also, fidgeting among other incidental physical activity helps keep an individual fit.
Among other reasons, fidgeting also serves as a coping mechanism for people with ADD. If a person is engaged in something that he/she is not interested in then the additional sensory-motor input that is even slightly stimulating or entertaining helps the brain to get completely engaged. This helps to maintain focus on the actual activity being performed by the individual.
So, fidgeting helps distract that part of the brain that is getting bored. This helps the other parts of the brain focus better on the actual activity. This is known as floating attention which perhaps is an evolutionary trait that dates back to prehistoric times. In those times, the ability to focus entirely on a task with undivided attention was not favorable to the human since doing so could make them unaware of the enormous ravenous beast hiding behind the bushes.
Thus, though there is some degree of understanding is there when it comes to fidgeting, more research studies are required to gain further insight. Consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

Fidgeting - Why Do We Do It?

Humans are social animals who thrive on reciprocality. It is in our basic nature to be socially courteous, and the word 'No' feels like a conflict that warns a potential relationship. Many of us tend to comply with every single request that is put forward to us by our peers, family, or at the workplace by our superiors. We choose to take up more jobs than we can efficiently handle and put unnecessary stress on ourselves even at the cost of our time and well-being. Must we always do that? 

Why is it so hard to say 'No'?

People have the notion that saying 'No' can come across as rude or uncaring. You may feel that you are letting someone down by turning down their request or risking a relationship. But, it has mostly to do with your self-confidence than your relationships with people. It may branch from overbearing parents, high expectations set by your peers and mentors or experiencing parenthood yourself and setting unreasonable standards for yourself. Childhood influences are usually the biggest cause of people always saying  yes  all the time.

People who have low self-confidence tend to value their own needs less than the needs of others. Saying 'No' feels rude, and no one wants to be impolite.

Well... saying 'No' does not mean you are being rude or disagreeable.

At the end of the day, it is more about how you say 'no', rather than just saying the word 'No'. Saying 'No' is about valuing and respecting your own time and priorities. 

How to start saying say 'No'?
If you want to take a step back and start saying 'No' to make sure your own needs are valued, here s what you need to do.

Refuse politely, when it seems not possible: Do not overcomplicate responses and try to be as simple in your responses as you can be. If you are asked to do something, and you want to say 'no', try to be polite in your body language and state that it is not convenient for you at the moment and that you would rather get back to it later.
Seek time before committing: The transition from saying  yes  all the time to saying no does take time! Start to give yourself more time and ask people to get back to you later. This way you can begin to build more self-confidence and learn to say no over time. This also allows you to evaluate your response instead of immediately saying yes or no to the person asking the favor or task.
Do not feel guilty: Deep down if you want to do a favor, you can go ahead with it, but you should also understand that it is okay to say no, and there is no need to associate guilt with it. You should set boundaries and allow people around you to understand how much favors they can ask you for instead of presenting you with an endless amount of favors from you.
Set your boundaries: Refusal does not amount to rejection as you have just as much right to say  no  as the person who is asking the favor from you. You are simply turning down a request, and in most situations, there is a middle ground for compromises where both you and the requester can be satisfied. If you have limited time to fulfill a request, let the person know and help out only as much as you can without overstepping your boundaries.
Bringing in these changes can help you be more self-confident, and at the same time enable you to say no when you need to without weighing yourself down with expectations and fear or rejection.

Simple Steps To Help You Say No!

One of the most common personality disorders, BPD or borderline personality disorder often remains undiagnosed or repressed and gets passed off as mood swings or a volatile disposition. However this disorder is much more than just mood swings as it can seriously affect the quality of a person s life. The primary manifestation of this disorder is in the way you think about yourself and others which result in the work that you need to do on a daily basis.

How does BPD manifest in your life?
The most common ways Borderline personality disorder can manifest in your life is with extreme mood swings or emotions, a discernable pattern in relationships becoming unstable after sometime, impulsive behavior, and a self image which is distorted. BPD thus affects how you view yourself, how you feel about others and you resultant behavior in general. Some of the typical signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder are mentioned below.

Persistent feelings of emptiness

Anger in inappropriate or unnecessary places, losing your temper very frequently, resulting in physical fights
Fearing abandonment intensely, whether it is real or imagined and thus going huge lengths to stop it from happening
Extreme instability in relationships which may cause a partner to be liked one moment and then hated the next
People with BPD also tend to be suicidal which is often caused by the fear of rejection or separation
Engaging in risky and impulsive behaviors such as
Engaging in unsafe sex despite being aware of the implications
Splurging money on gambling
Leaving a good job suddenly
A tendency to indulge in drugs
Binge eating
Reckless driving
Suddenly terminating a healthy and positive relationship
Sudden changes in values and self-identity and goals and feeling low about yourself as a result
Causes of Borderline personality disorder
In most cases borderline personality disorder can t be exactly attributed to a single cause and in most cases, is a combination of factors. While genetic or hereditary predisposition can cause BPD it may also be triggered by other factors. Also, not curbing mal-traits in young children or encouraging such behaviors may lead to BPD as they grow up. Some of the factors that contribute to BPD are

Genetics
Abnormalities in the brain
Childhood incidents which were stressful
Personality traits which have worsened
If you think you have been displaying some of the symptoms for a fairly prolonged period, it is advisable that you visit a mental health professional for counseling and start with therapy as advised by them.

Borderline Personality Disorder - How It Manifests In Your Life?

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