HOW TO BOUNCE BACK FROM FAILURE

“It's fine to celebrate success, but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure,” Bill Gates said. We always shower praise on those who have triumphed. Very rarely do we examine all the times the successful people have failed, and analyze how they turned their “luck” around. In this tip, you will understand how to turn failure into success and bounce back with more fervour.

1. A SUCCESSFUL MINDSET: If you’re striving to achieve anything then failure is inevitable. “Whenever you’re trying a new experiment, whether it’s a new job, a new product, a new hobby, a new boyfriend or girlfriend–whatever it is–you need to give some thought to what is your strategy and which are the possible ways to achieve it. Do you have any plan B or plan C if plan A fails? What will you do if nothing works out...and how to minimise the losses as well as taking advantage of the opportunities that you have. Assessing your opportunities and threats to success is very important. When a newly wedded girl comes to stay with her In laws, she might need to have a number of ways in her kitty to make her place in the new household rather than just stick to a few traditional ones. If one technique doesn't work, try something else. Disaster strikes when creativity is not given a place and failure was not factored in. Feeling helpless doesn't add upto success. Optimism is what people need to bounce back with.

2. LEARN AND IMPROVE WITH EACH FAILURE: Failure is just an opportunity to learn and improve. It’s a teaching moment that should be analyzed with a practical, clear mind. It helps to see mistakes as stepping stones to learning and improving and using it as an opportunity to bounce back. Every person should behave like a scientist with a mind open to exploring, assessing, making mistakes and changing. Mistakes must be embraced as being part of the process of success. If we don’t make mistakes it means that we’re not trying, and if we’re not trying then we’re not learning and getting better. Your self-worth should not rest on perfectionism, but rather value your ability to accept and learn from your mistakes. Not everyone is willing to admit when they’re wrong, which can hamper progress and relationships. When Meena and Arun started dating each other, they didn't know each other well and tried to impress each other in ways that was not working out well for both of them. It was very frustrating for them to see that their relationship was not working out. In counselling, they realised that they were not asking what each can do to impress the other. Meena told Arun that she would like to be taken out to plays and theatre by her future partner and Arun told Meena that he would like to take weekend trips to nearby destinations to get to know his partner well. When they both started doing what the other appreciated, they got to know each other better and relationship started blooming. Thus Arun and Meena assessed the situation, were open to discussion and found an amicable solution instead of thinking of their previous efforts as failure and giving up. 

3. LOVE YOUR CRITICS: How do you feel when your work gets criticised repeatedly by your boss, manager or your husband. It mighty be hurtful and demeaning to hear critical feedback, but if many people are saying the same things about your work or behaviour, then maybe it's time to give it a serious thought. When Saira was often told that she wasn't cooperative enough in team activities and tends to slacken and pass on work to other members, her mind started working. She had got the same comments in her previous organisations. She started seeing a grain of truth in this feedback and took steps to rectify complaints that stood out common in all the feedbacks and reworked her way back to become a sought after team member. Her next years' appraisal was better and got her an increment. Saira triumphed, because she knew how to learn from criticism.

4. ACCEPT FAILURE AS AN IMPORTANT PART OF LIFE: Shivani was heartbroken when her 15 year old perfect son started doing badly in exams. Her world fell apart when she came to know that he had secured 73% in 10th grade. She felt that she had failed as a parent and her son as she had not devoted enough time to her son as she was a working mother. In counselling, she was asked if she knew any parent who had never failed their kids and were always there for them. Shivani couldn't come up with any names of such mothers who had been perfect to the core. Yes, that's how real mothers are...you will fail sometimes and you will win sometimes. Every moment you are real with your child, you are succeeding as a mother. Accepting failure as a part of life and knowing that you gave it your best shot is good enough. There's magic in feeling genuine regret rather than overkilling guilt and shame. Own your failure openly, publicly, and you'll reap a harvest of forgiveness, trust, respect, and connection—the things you thought you'd get by succeeding. Ironic, isn't it?

5. GO WITH YOUR GUT: When you see a red flag, pay attention. How many times in life have you kicked yourself for not listening to that little voice in your head that says, “Something is wrong here”?. Preetam gave an interview with an organisation, going by their market reputation. Yet during the interview, he picked up feelings of dissonance within the company. After joining them, he realised that his gut was right..the company was going through major shuffle and policy changes, which were not working out for Preetam.

6. BE A PROBLEM SOLVER AND STAY CALM: In a crisis, people tend to get anxious. Maintaining a sense of Zen will not only allow you to think more clearly but will also set the tone for those around you. Kapil used to get tensed over small details. He realised that in the larger scheme of things they were really not that important. He focussed his energies on things that were more important for him to reach his monthly targets. This started calming him down.

7. FIND A SOLUTION: You need to figure out how to address and remedy the situation. Start by considering your end game — what’s the ultimate outcome you’d like to see? — and work backwards from there. Daya wanted to be a good father to his children. He wanted them to remember him as a gentle and loving father. He started working backwards and his daily actions and behaviours showed to his children that Daya was a loving father. He played with them, took them for cricket coaching, went swimming, shared personal success and failures and most of all listened to them when they had to say something.

8. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY OF YOUR MISTAKES AND FAILURES: If you screwed up, don’t make excuses — just apologise genuinely for any errors on your part. Remember, that no one is perfect and it's human to err. Prema was a caring mother. She had many dreams about her daughter and wanted her to do well in studies and be a well behaved child of the family. But when her daughter started showing disinterest in studies and marks started falling, Prema used to beat up her daughter in her anxiety to do well. In counselling Prema understood that her intentions were good, but the way she communicated were not helping the situation as Prema's daughter hated her mother and maintained distance. Prema owned up her mistakes and apologised for her errors to her daughter. She also took remedial action to be accepting of her daughter and gave her the space to make her own mistakes and learn from them. 

9. BECOME PROACTIVE: Don’t let a small mistake linger and turn into a bigger one. That’s not to say you should simply be reactive, but i f you know you did something wrong, deal with it right away. Say, for example, you stuck your foot in your mouth during an important business meeting and inadvertently offended your boss or a client. Acknowledge the gaffe, apologize and try to move on without beating yourself up. Remember that, “In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.

10. DEFINE YOUR OWN SUCCESS AND FAILURES: Its important to have your own definition of both rather than how the world sees and defines success and failure. Find answers to questions like: How would you be behaving when you have succeeded, what must happen to feel successful, how will your life change when you are successful? Every person has a very different view and definition for success and making it your own definition can spell failure. Don't let the world tell you whether you have failed or succeeded. It's also excellent for self esteem and works as a protective shield from potential damage. 

So, next time there’s that misstep, mistake or misunderstanding, remember to take a deep breath and be your own best publicist by remaining calm, seeking the solution and seeing the challenge as an opportunity to lead and learn.









How To Bounce Back From Failure - Tips From A Pyschologist

The risks and harms of smoking are pretty much common knowledge to most people. Especially when the pack of cigarettes practically screams it out to you in bold letters. Yet, as statistics would say, smoking in young adults has been on the rise in the recent years. What makes them take this step? Maybe it is peer pressure, or maybe they do it for the thrill of it. Every country takes a great initiative in educating their population, yet some fail to understand the complexity of the situation.

Here are some of the reasons that will tell you that even a single puff of the deadly tobacco can severely harm your health and general well-being

Cigarette smoking is the leading cause of cancer. It can cause cancer in most organs of the body. Smoking cigarettes can cause the following
Nose cancer
Throat cancer
Larynx cancer
Mouth cancer
Oesophageal cancer
Lung cancer
Liver cancer
Cervix cancer
Stomach cancer
Kidney cancer
Colorectal cancer
Cervical cancer etc.
Smokers are more prone to respiratory diseases because smoking is capable of compromising the immune system of the body.
Autoimmune diseases such as Crohn s disease and Rheumatoid Arthritis are more likely to occur in smokers as their immune system is compromised by smoking.
Smoking has been linked to Diabetes type 2. This type of diabetes develops during adulthood. The more cigarettes a person smokes, the more likely is the person to develop this disease.
Smoking puts you at risk of developing several heart diseases such as angina, heart attacks, etc. because the nicotine in the body results in the lowering of good cholesterol. This causes deposition of bad cholesterol in the arteries.
Tobacco can cause tooth decay and several other oral problems such as gingivitis and other problems of the gum.
Cigarettes constrict your blood vessels. This constant narrowing of blood vessels can cause erectile dysfunction in men and leads to the infertility in both men and women. It also makes them difficult to achieve orgasms.
You might find yourself craving for cigarettes when you re stressed out. This is because the effect of nicotine in the cigarettes is lowered by the hormone produced during a stressful situation, i.e. cortisone.
Nicotine that causes momentary central nervous system stimulation can cause addiction and dependence.

How Smoking is Harmful For Your Health?

Ayurveda is a renowned life science that has been credited with changing lives since ancient times. Not only can it prevent diseases and ailments, but it can also cure them with its combination of herbal medication, everyday routine and yogic poses. Weight management is a field that also enjoys various Ayurvedic remedies. Some of them are as follows.

Herbs: Herbs are a way of healing used by Ayurveda, and the use of various herbs can help in hastening the metabolism for healthy weight management.

Taste: Ayurveda recognizes six distinct tastes that should be incorporated into one's daily diet. These tastes include salty, pungent, sour, sweet, bitter and finally, astringent. Each of these tastes has several properties that balance the various hormones and health factors in one's body. These tastes form the various counterpoints to alleviate all kinds of health problems, which finally help in effective weight management. Also, one must eat all the seasonal fruits and vegetables to keep the body and hormones in good balance.
 
Exercise: While a daily routine of exercise is a must in any life science, Ayurveda too propagates the devotion of at least 45 minutes to one hour towards some form of exercise. Walking is said to be the most important and effective forms of exercise, followed by several yoga poses that can help in better weight management. Also, as per Ayurveda, it is important to move after each and every meal, so that a routine of eating and activity is built into the system. 

Sleep: Ayurveda recognizes sleep or rest as one of the most important aspects of a healthy lifestyle. While good eating habits and exercise form one side of it, sleep or rest completes the triangle. One can also practice the Savasana or resting pose for a period of rest. And at least six to seven hours of sleep is a must as per Ayurveda.

Meditation: This practice helps in focusing on awareness which can instil the desired function like weight management in the body. Being mindful of what your body needs can also help in eating and exercising right.

Weight management is a lifelong process in Ayurveda.

Weight Management and Ayurveda

As per medical studies, bipolar disorder is a personality disorder that is said to affect millions of people around the world, as per medical studies. Extreme mood swings that take a person from a state of euphoria to depression can be called bipolar disorder. While we all go through phases of the same, the patients who suffer from this disorder will usually show a persistent swing or shift between varying moods. The severe shifts will lead to difficulties when it comes to managing one's everyday affairs in a normal manner. The symptoms and signs are also characterised by the phases and mood swings that the patient may be going through. 
Read on to know more about the signs and symptoms of bipolar disorder.

1. Mania: One of the extremes in mood swings experienced by the patient includes extreme euphoria or mania for no apparent, or life altering reason. Feeling overly happy and enthusiastic are the basic symptoms of this phase.

2. Impulsive: The patient can end up feeling elated for a prolonged period of time, with extreme restlessness and impulsive behaviour. They may also end up getting agitated and edgy. This is usually characterised by fidgety behaviour and when the patient speaks too fast. The patient may speak too fast due to racing thoughts which overtake his or her speech and actions.

3. Confidence: In this stage, the patient may also display extraordinary confidence, which may not necessarily be backed by reality. In reality, things may be very different in terms of opportunities, skills, people and other such factors. During this mania phase, the patient may also indulge in risky behaviour that gives an adrenaline rush like gambling and having sexual intercourse with multiple partners. This usually happens when the patient is bolstered by a sudden surge of unfounded confidence.

4. Depression: This is the other end of the spectrum for these patients. When the mania abates, it gives to way to extreme depression and even anxiety.

5. Withdrawal: The patient usually tends to isolate himself or herself from the rest of the family and social circle for a prolonged period, refusing to meet anyone on a normal basis. They also avoid contact with people whom they meet every day, which can have an adverse effect on their work and the rest of the aspects of their lives.

6. Memory and Concentration: In this phase, the patient can also experience difficulty in remembering important things and concentrating on tasks. The patient may also be preoccupied with a number of things which can prevent him or her from making proper decisions. Slow speech and lack of energy may follow as a result of such preoccupation. Preoccupation with death is a common symptom of this phase.

Symptoms of Bipolar Disorder

Schizophrenia has been recognized as a mental disorder that combines symptoms like hallucinations with distorted thinking and others like fright and severe paranoia. This condition is one that gets progressively worse over time and leads to delusional thinking. Oversleeping and complaining of fatigue are usually the earliest signs of this condition's onset. Eventually, it becomes a debilitating factor in the life of the patient, who will not be able to function in a normal way due to the severe symptoms.

Read on to know more about the types and causes of this condition:

Genetic Causes: Schizophrenia may be caused due to genetic factors and it may be a learned or inherited disorder. It is known to affect patients who have a parent or a sibling who may have suffered from this condition. Yet, one must also remember that Schizophrenia can only be influenced by genetics, and not determined by the same.
Environmental Causes: When there has been an exposure to a viral infection during the pre natal stage, the patient is susceptible to this condition. Also, it may affect children who have been subject to the loss of a parent or separation at an early age. Physical and emotional abuse in one's childhood may also bring on this condition. Low level of oxygen at the time of birth is one of the causes of this condition in many patients.
Anomalies in Brain Structure: When the brain ventricles of the patient are enlarged, he or she may be prone to this condition. Also, anomalies in the temporal lobes and amygdala have links with the onset of this condition.
Types: A wide variety of mental and medical conditions can manifest with psychotic symptoms that must be considered in the differential diagnosis of schizophreniform disorder. These include psychotic disorder due to another medical condition or its treatment; delirium or major neurocognitive disorder; substance/medication-induced psychotic disorder or delirium; depressive or bipolar disorder with psychotic features; schizoaffective disorder; other specified or unspecified bipolar and related disorder; depressive or bipolar disorder with catatonic features; schizophrenia; brief psychotic disorder; delusional disorder; other specified or unspecified schizophrenia spectrum and other psychotic disorder; schizotypal, schizoid, or paranoid personality disorders; autism spectrum disorder; disorders presenting in childhood with disorganized speech; attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder; obsessive-compulsive disorder; posttraumatic stress disorder; and traumatic brain injury.
Since the diagnostic criteria for schizophreniform disorder and schizophrenia differ primarily in duration of illness, the discussion of the differential diagnosis of schizophrenia also applies to schizophreniform disorder. 

Brief psychotic disorder. Schizophreniform disorder differs in duration from brief psychotic disorder, which has a duration of less than 1 month.

Residual Schizophrenia is a condition where the patient does not experience the various debilitating symptoms of the condition, and is on the road to recovery. Yet, even in this type of Schizophrenia, the patient will not really show any interest in life and the activities around him or her. Finally, the last type of Schizophrenia is Schizoaffective Disorder which is characterised by the symptoms of Schizophrenia as well as the symptoms of major mood disorders. When combined, this condition can lead to major complications and complex behavior.

A patient suffering from this condition will need to see a mental health specialist like a psychiatrist or a psychologist on an immediate basis. The treatment will be carried out on a long term basis for the results to start appearing.

Schizophrenia - Know the Causes Behind it

Schizophrenia is a mental disorder which is characterized by disturbed mental thoughts in the patient, paranoia, phobias, hallucination, slow dementia and etc. As it is clear from this brief definition, Schizophrenia is a serious mental illness which can leave a patient stranded from performing basic day-to-day activities or even keeping healthy relationships with their close ones. 

Even though there is no particular age where people are vulnerable from suffering from this disease, yet from a common observation and study conducted on the patients, it has been observed that schizophrenia hit men in their early 20 s and early 30 s in case of women. The study also feels that it is impossible for a schizophrenic to be of age younger than 12 or older than 40. According to another study conducted by the universities, the life of a schizophrenic patient is not guaranteed. 

Symptoms of Schizophrenia:

As mentioned above, there is a common pattern in each schizophrenic patient, however, it is next to impossible to diagnose schizophrenia in teenagers since the onset of the disease is symbolized by the patient's constant change of friends or decrease of performance in school, both of which is normal in teen years. Schizophrenics also isolate themselves and become moody which again, is a common instinct of the teenager. However, apart from these, there are other differentiating symptoms as mentioned below which help in the accurate diagnosis of the disease. 

Hallucinating
Delusional
Emotionally dull and disconnected with their loved ones
Negative social life and academic performance
Dementia
Disability of remembering easy-to-learn and remember things
Causes of Schizophrnia

According to the researchers, there are more than one reasons for this disease. Read them all below:

Genetic mutation and inheritance- genetics play an important role in this disease. It needs more than one mutational combination of schizophrenia to happen and that is why it is observed in less than 1% of the population only. Those who have had a family history of schizophrenia are very hard to inherit the disease because patients hardly ever reach the stage of life called marriage. But a family history of psychosis is sure a determining factor. 
Neurotic reason- this reason includes the brain chemistry and important brain chemical such as- dopamine and glutamate.
Drug abuse- it has been revealed that consuming hallucinating and mind-altering drugs during teenage years are greatly responsible for the increase in the number of schizophrenia cases in early 20 s.
Treatment

As it was mentioned above, there is absolutely no way to cure schizophrenia known to man as of yet. However, the only way to approach it medically is by managing its symptoms separately. Such as:

Antipsychotic medication
Psychotherapies Self-help groups
Nursing care

Schizophrenia - What Causes It?

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