Do you know why some people accomplish more and generally are much happier in their lives?
 
The field of Positive Psychology explains this. Research says, one of the signature strengths that such people have is "Gratitude. Gratitude makes them take better care of themselves physically and mentally. It also makes people engage in more proactive and healthy way. It promotes the motivation for exercise, healthy diet and willingness to wriggle out of any negative situations in life. It helps boost your immune system.  Since it makes you more optimistic and alert, you cope better with stress and feel healthier.

How to Have An Attitude of Gratitude?

1) Be Mindful of What You Have - Being thankful for very small things actually bring a great amount of joy. Have gratitude for small things like sunlight, rain, flowers, a cup of tea, a caring spouse, a child's laughter. It gives us the resilience to cope with tougher situations.

2) Keep a Gratitude Journal - Every night before going to bed, write down "What was the best thing that happened to you that day.  It fosters better sleep and a sense of well being and satisfaction.

3) Reframe Challenging Situations - It's not the situation but our perception of the situation that makes it challenging. You can reframe your reactions and respond by saying that "I may have a very demanding boss, but I have become more organized, patient. It will help you to attend to your work and be cheerful.

4) Practice saying Thank You - It's very simple. When you buy a bus ticket, just smile and say 'Thank You. Feel the first raindrops on your face and smile in gratitude for all the life it brings.

5) Focus your attention outwards - According to Emmons, a US psychology professor, people who are more aware of the positives in their lives tend to focus their attention outside of themselves. They feel complete, satisfied and fulfilled in their lives and are capable of helping the less fortunate ones.

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5 Reasons Why Some People Accomplish More And Are Much Happier

Humans are social animals who thrive on reciprocality. It is in our basic nature to be socially courteous, and the word 'No' feels like a conflict that warns a potential relationship. Many of us tend to comply with every single request that is put forward to us by our peers, family, or at the workplace by our superiors. We choose to take up more jobs than we can efficiently handle and put unnecessary stress on ourselves even at the cost of our time and well-being. Must we always do that? 

Why is it so hard to say 'No'?

People have the notion that saying 'No' can come across as rude or uncaring. You may feel that you are letting someone down by turning down their request or risking a relationship. But, it has mostly to do with your self-confidence than your relationships with people. It may branch from overbearing parents, high expectations set by your peers and mentors or experiencing parenthood yourself and setting unreasonable standards for yourself. Childhood influences are usually the biggest cause of people always saying  yes  all the time.

People who have low self-confidence tend to value their own needs less than the needs of others. Saying 'No' feels rude, and no one wants to be impolite.

Well... saying 'No' does not mean you are being rude or disagreeable.

At the end of the day, it is more about how you say 'no', rather than just saying the word 'No'. Saying 'No' is about valuing and respecting your own time and priorities. 

How to start saying say 'No'?
If you want to take a step back and start saying 'No' to make sure your own needs are valued, here s what you need to do.

Refuse politely, when it seems not possible: Do not overcomplicate responses and try to be as simple in your responses as you can be. If you are asked to do something, and you want to say 'no', try to be polite in your body language and state that it is not convenient for you at the moment and that you would rather get back to it later.
Seek time before committing: The transition from saying  yes  all the time to saying no does take time! Start to give yourself more time and ask people to get back to you later. This way you can begin to build more self-confidence and learn to say no over time. This also allows you to evaluate your response instead of immediately saying yes or no to the person asking the favor or task.
Do not feel guilty: Deep down if you want to do a favor, you can go ahead with it, but you should also understand that it is okay to say no, and there is no need to associate guilt with it. You should set boundaries and allow people around you to understand how much favors they can ask you for instead of presenting you with an endless amount of favors from you.
Set your boundaries: Refusal does not amount to rejection as you have just as much right to say  no  as the person who is asking the favor from you. You are simply turning down a request, and in most situations, there is a middle ground for compromises where both you and the requester can be satisfied. If you have limited time to fulfill a request, let the person know and help out only as much as you can without overstepping your boundaries.
Bringing in these changes can help you be more self-confident, and at the same time enable you to say no when you need to without weighing yourself down with expectations and fear or rejection.

Simple Steps To Help You Say No!

When you get a compliment'smart thinking or you are intelligent or that was intelligent of you, you definitely feel good. These comments fill us with confidence, admiration and pride and we want it to happen to us again and again. But owing to a busy schedule and long working hours it might not be possible. Having said this, it does not mean that a person cannot stay intelligent throughout. This can be easily achieved by regular meditation. Regular meditation and yoga helps the mind to be more reflective and efficient.

Here are reasons how yoga and meditation lead to an intellectual learning and growth:

 Utilizes the brain: almost everyone uses one half of their brain more and this leads to imbalance. Meditation is believed to sync the left and the right hemispheres, thereby allowing neural connection and great processing power. When logical left and creative right brains start working in harmony, then solving problems becomes easy; and it also increases creativity, deep thinking comes to be known of and concentration and focus magnifies. Highly successful people usually display whole brain synchronization.
 Functional capabilities of brain enhance due to meditation: research backs it that meditation increases the gray matter thickness of the brain regions, thus making the brain smarter, bigger and faster. This is very similar to doing physical exercise which makes the muscles denser and stronger. The increase in functional capabilities of brain is based on the concept of neuroplasticity, which states that our intelligence is not based on genetics and there are some things which can be done to improve the way our brain works. Meditation is a good brain enhancer with an ability to increase intelligence.
 Beneficial brainwave patterns can be seen: meditation can help to guide the brainwaves into beneficial frequencies. The frequencies: alpha, theta and delta when guided can show case a myriad of benefits including idea generation, creativity, cognitive functioning, and intellectual capacity. Meditation helps to transform these beneficial states of mind and help boost the iq.
 Develops intuition and insights: these are generally obtained through listening and developing to the inner voice. Thus meditation forms to be the basic key to tap these latent abilities. The intelligence can be mapped through tests and quizzes and is valuable at each level to stimulate insights and creativity. As per some people, inner intelligence, is considered to be the most important and best success in the world. Successful people including steve jobs have stated that their super revolutionary ideas and business acumen came through their intuition.
 Meditation helps in improving both short and long term memory: the key memory areas hippocampus and frontal lobe show increase in activity during meditation. By stimulating these areas, the short and long term memories are improved.

Can Yoga Improve Your IQ?

Depression is spreading at a fast pace in modern India due to many reasons like poor diet, lifestyles, poor social support system and having too many unrealistic expectations from themselves and other people in their lives. It can affect the rich and the poor and any age group also. According to World Health Organisation, 1 in every 10 people suffer from depression. Due to the social stigma attached to it, most people remain undiagnosed and hence suffer from it silently. This is a huge waste of human potential and capability. Some common symptoms of Depression include:

Appetite loss or an increased hunger,
Insomnia or Oversleeping,
Pervading feelings of worthlessness, helplessness and hopelessness,
Anger and Irritability,
Intense physical, emotional and mental fatigue,
Self hatred for making mistakes and not coming up to the expectations of self or other people
Risky Behaviour like rash driving, addictions, dangerous sports,
Problems in Concentration, Memorising and Focussing
Unexplained aches and pains, stomach-aches, Back pain or Headaches
Sudden loss of Interest in Daily Activities, Hobbies. Work
Suicidal Thoughts or Attempts

Here are some basic tips to beat the blues.

Recognising and Conquering Self Criticising Inner Voice:
You would have heard this harsh voice which often reprimands you for making mistakes, or doing something silly or taking any risks. Often this voice would have said, "Its always your fault"," You are capable of nothing"," You are always making mistakes", "Only bad things have happened in my life", " My life is Over". These are called self destructive negative thoughts which can interfere and distract you from your daily activities and a general sense of confidence, power, wellbeing and balance. Depressed people often associate themselves with a negative image of self and of the world, which is very incapacitating and makes the person feel guilty, angry, worthless, hopeless and helpless. The trick is to combat this inner thinking process with evidence to disprove it and support the evidence with logical and rational reasoning and seeing the whole picture with its positives rather than focussing on the negative parts only. For eg.."Good things have also happened in my marriage"," I can learn from my mistakes and do things differently next time"," I have achieved many things in life so I am capable and intelligent"," Life is not over yet, there is hope because I am still alive". such statements are compassionate and help in restoring lost confidence, faith and hope which is vital to beat depression blues.

Be Active:
During depression, physical energy takes a beating as a person goes through an emotionally low phase. People who don't exercise regularly are more prone to depression as the body and mind lacks in blood circulation and "feel good" neuro chemicals called Endorphins. When you are feeling down in the dumps, exercising, yoga, gym, cycling, aerobics, dance can help in elevating the heart rate and thus increasing the blood circulation and elevating the moods. Cycling to work, using the stairs, walking just a little bit as a  daily small goal can be beneficial as energy levels can be very low in depression. Getting the sun on the back bone which carries many nerves is also important and helps in chemical synthesis in combating depression.

Be Social:
Man is a social animal by evolutionary process. We tend to feel better in harmonious social communities for our social and psychological wellbeing. Identify people who are well meaning and supportive of your condition. Don't withdraw from the society, thought hat may be the easiest and logical thing to do in depression. Meeting people with similar interests as yours, people who value you for who you are and some people who are funny and can make you laugh will be of immense importance for boosting your self esteem and self worth. See if some one can benefit from your care..caring for others is a huge booster of self worth and self esteem. Having a pet and caring for it can be another activity that you can look into. Watching comedy shows, movies, laughing at your own mistakes or other people mistakes can be a wonderful way to look at life more objectively. Don't take yourself and other people too seriously..everyone makes mistakes and nobody is perfect.


By no means is this list complete. Please look around and find more tips that can help in beating the blues. If Depression is caught in its early stages then its completely curable. Please don't self diagnose and take medications. Get it diagnosed with a psychiatrist or a psychologist. Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, Stress management, Marital Counselling, Meditations and relaxation techniques, Spirituality are very powerful in dealing with depression too.

3 ways to combat depression

Depression is a very unfortunate state to be in, in every sense of the word. It is a sickness of the mind and can only be felt by the person experiencing it. As a matter of fact, it is even worse when depression does not occur on its own, but is rather accompanied by another condition such as fatigue.

There are many cases where depression occurs along with chronic fatigue syndrome. The irony is that when a person is depressed, he or she is unlikely to be willing to get out of bed and when this is compounded by chronic fatigue syndrome, even if the depression alleviates, it would not make much of a difference as it would be a case of  mind willing, flesh weak !

Many of the people who are diagnosed with depression have extreme patterns when it comes to sleep. Either he or she would sleep for extended periods of time and feel lethargic to do anything else. Or, the other situation is generally when he or she is more or less an insomniac and does not get sleep even if he or she would really like to grab a bit of shut-eye!

What are the Symptoms?
When a person is going through depression, it can be said to be of the highest importance to be able to judge the symptoms of the condition soon, so that the person can go and seek treatment. The symptoms, which are being talked about include extreme eating habits, that is, either eating way too much or not enough at all, along with a continuous sense of anxiety which, depending on how severe the case of depression is, can cause a person to have his or her mind clouded by the anxiety which over sweeps all other thoughts. In addition to these symptoms, there are other signs which appear with the onset and continuance of depression. These include disinterest in hobbies, which once appeared enjoyable to take part in.

Chronic fatigue syndrome kills off any urge to partake in any activity, which is voluntary in nature. With the combination of these two conditions, it can be quite possible, rather unfortunately, for a person to find himself or herself to be stuck in a vicious cycle. Sleep disorders, such as sleep apnea can really kill a person s zing and as a result of the same, make it harder for him or her to get out of depression and more likely to fall into depression if he or she has not yet. Curing depression includes changes schedules, engaging in yoga and other similar activities. Dietary changes may also be warranted. However, the recovery should take effect soon!

Depression - It Can Cause You to Feel 100 Years Old

3 Things You Did Not Know You Should See a Psychologist For


Most people consider seeing a psychologist an act of weakness or embarrassment. Therefore, they never think that their prolonged periods of stress, anxiety, grief and conflict could be a sign that they need professional help. They fail to understand that psychotherapy is nothing but a strategy to relieve stress and make life easier to live and that often, it does not require you to get stuck amidst expensive treatments or prolonged medication and consultation sessions.
Here are 3 times when you did not know but you needed to see a psychologist.

1. You feel intense emotions
It is common for everybody to feel angry or sad at times in their life but if you feel these emotions too intensely, frequently and for prolonged durations, it may be the right time for you to see a psychologist. If your emotions overpower you to such an extent that your ability to function is impaired, it is a sure shot sign that you need professional attention. Also, if your anxiety levels are so high that you immediately imagine the worst case scenarios associated with any challenging situation that comes your way, you should not delay your visit to the psychologist because it may lead to panic attacks and paralysis.


2. You cannot stop thinking about the trauma that you had faced sometime in your life
If you are too grieved with the pain of death, loss of job, fear of accident etc. that you once faced in your life and there is no way how you think that you can get over it, you should seek immediate help from a psychologist. You may think that these feelings are natural and that you cannot do anything about them but in reality, it is not so. In fact, if left untreated, these conditions can lead you to a lifestyle where daily functioning is impaired. So if your trauma is too hard for you to handle, consider visiting a psychotherapist to prevent further damage.


3. You fall ill too quickly and headaches are a persistent problem
Being emotionally upset can affect your body in more ways than you think. So every time when you fall ill, the cause may not always be a physical medical condition. Stress and anxiety can lead to chronic illnesses like frequent stomach ache, reduced sexual drive, frequent cold, severe neck pain etc. So if you fall ill too quickly and the reasons for your illness are far beyond the comprehension of the general practitioner, it is high time that you consider visiting a psychologist.




3 Things You Did Not Know You Should See a Psychologist For

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