In many cases; divorce and separation leads not only to bad blood between the parents, but also in a child alienating himself from one parent. Insulting or belittling one parent without justification or under pressure from the other parent is known as parental alienation syndrome. Parental alienation involves one parent undermining the other and interfering with the child s relationship with the other parent by limiting contact with them, bad mouthing them, forbidding discussion about them etc. This can have a very negative effect on the child s emotional state.

1. Self hatred: For children, hatred is not inborn, but developed by the situations they are in. By bad mouthing a parent and teaching the child to hate the parent, the child himself is harmed. With time, he begins to internalize this hatred and believe that there is something wrong with him that made the alienated parent not want him.

2. Low self esteem: When a child is not allowed to speak his mind and has to bottle up his thoughts, he becomes socially withdrawn. Often the child begins to feel that he is the cause for the rift in the family and makes himself responsible for the separation. This intensifies with time and makes the child lose confidence in himself leading to low self esteem.

3. Lack of trust: When a child is suddenly pulled away from one parent and told how that parent is not a  good person  the child is likely to feel betrayed. This creates a sense of doubt in the child s mind and makes it difficult for him to trust other people. As he grows up, this can affect his own adult relationships as well.

4. Depression: Depression is a commonly seen in children from broken homes and this is intensified in cases of parental alienation. It is rooted in the child s feeling unloved by either one of the parents and built up by the separation. Not being given a chance to speak about their feelings or talk about the situation makes them more depressed and they begin to withdraw into themselves. In many cases, it is noted that alienated children have strained relationships with their own children as well.

5. Substance abuse: Depression is one of the most common triggers for substance abuse. Alienated children often feels trapped and that they have no outlet to vent their feelings and frustrations. This often makes them turn towards drugs for relief and can make them victims of substance abuse.

Effects of Parental Alienation Syndrome on Children

Drug addiction is one of the social menaces and in most people, what starts off as a result of peer pressure and trying to be cool ends up affecting lives significantly. It is not just social, but also affects financial, physical, emotional, and social well-being. The small periods of happiness given by the drug is followed by months and years of torment.

The National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) has identified that drug addiction causes chemical and structural changes in the brain, leading to dangerous and self-destructive behaviours. The brain s response to stimulus like pleasure, joy, happiness, and pain are altered with constant drug abuse. For instance, the neurotransmitter called dopamine, which makes one feel good, is usually produced by the brain in small amounts. However, drugs increase this level to 2 to 10 times more, making the person feel extremely high and happy. Since the body is unable to reach the highest level of happiness on its own, the dependency on these drugs to feel good increases.

Repeated use of the drugs leads to increased dependency, wherein the brain refuses to feel good without reaching those high levels of dopamine. The issue is mostly seen in teenagers and young adults but can be seen in any age group.

October 2 is recognised as National Anti-Drug Addiction Day and nationwide campaigns and drives are done to help people overcome addiction. One of the main reasons a drive this size is required is because of the social stigma attached to the problem. Most families shun away from recognising it as a problem that can be easily treated, and so the affected person is sucked deeper into the problem.

Overcoming addiction: One of the main success factors for treating addiction is for the affected person to recognise that he or she is addicted and needs to get rid of the problem.

    There are national toll-free helplines that are set up, which can guide through the whole program. This way, if required, anonymity is maintained and support for overcoming addiction is increased.
    It involves a group effort involving the affected person, family and friends, medical and clinical personnel, and counsellors in some cases.
    Cognitive behavioural therapy: The person is made conscious of the change in behaviour and the way drugs affect it. Healthier patterns to be happy and joyful are discussed.
    In most cases, the underlying reason for reaching out to drugs needs to be addressed also to prevent relapse.
    Group therapies where the person makes friends who have faced similar issues and overcome the problem. This increases their accountability and commitment to getting rid of the problem.

Drug abuse is a national social menace and needs more free admittance and management.

National Anti-Drug Addiction Day - Overcoming Addiction

A cup of coffee or tea is not just enough to keep you alert throughout the day. They might be good for an early morning kick off. But you need a lot more in your diet to increase your concentration power.

Here s a list of food items that work wonders in gifting you a focused mind:

Coconut Oil: When it comes to your brain, coconut oil full of benefits, too. Coconut oil works as a natural anti-inflammatory, suppressing cells responsible for inflammation. It can help with memory loss as you age and destroy bad bacteria that hangs out in your gut.
Dark Chocolate: It has been found that dark chocolate boosts the production of serotonin and endorphin. These are essential for increasing concentration. Dark chocolates are also useful antioxidants and are rich in vitamins, and minerals, including potassium and copper. It is believed by many that regular intake of cocoa improves the blood supply to the brain and thus increases concentration power.
Blueberries: Are you fond of the tasty blueberries? There s good news for you then. Blueberries are not just good for taste, they are memory boosters. According to a study published in 2010 in the Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry, it has been found that people, who drank blueberry juice daily for two months, ended up having improved memory and concentration power.
Egg Yolks: Yolks contain large amounts of choline, which helps in fetal brain development for pregnant women. It also breaks down bethane, a chemical that produces hormones related to happiness. That s right, eggs can make you happy! If you ve kept away from eating eggs whole because of cholesterol concerns, there s good news. Studies show that eating eggs had no effect on the cholesterol levels of healthy adults and might, in fact, help raise good cholesterol levels. 
Walnuts: It turns out that eating walnuts can keep you from going nuts. Just munching on a few walnuts a day can improve your cognitive health. Their high levels of antioxidants, vitamins and minerals also improve mental alertness. The vitamin E in the nuts can also help ward off Alzheimer s. 
Salmon: Believe it or not, but salmon improves your memory and concentration to a great extent. It contains omega-3 fatty acids, which is needed for rebuilding brain cells. Omega-3 is also good for enhancing the synapses in the brain. 

Want Better Concentration - 6 Foods You Must Have!

The feeling of instability is the crux of borderline personality disorder. This condition usually begins in early adulthood and is worst at its onset. As a person ages, borderline personality disorder usually improves and becomes easier to handle. For a person with borderline personality disorder, everything from their relationships to their moods, thinking and behaviour is unstable and constantly changing. This can be frightening but thankfully, this condition can be treated.

As with any other personality disorder or health issue, the earlier a condition is diagnosed, the easier it is to treat. Hence, it is important to understand the signs and symptoms of this disorder. This disease manifests itself in different ways in each person but some symptoms are commonly experienced. These include:

Fear of abandonment: No one likes to be alone, but people suffering from borderline personality disorder are terrified of being abandoned. Even something as simple as being stood up at a meeting, can make such a person extremely anxious. It can also lead to relationship problems by making the person seem clingy and jealous about their partner.
Unstable relationships: For a person suffering from this disorder, relationships are either perfect or failures. Hence their relationships are extremely passionate but very short lived and they often feel disappointed by their partners.
Unstable self-image: People suffering from this disorder may feel very confident one day and feel the opposite on the next. Though everyone has shifting views of their identity form time to time, for people suffering from this personality disorder, theses shifts are extreme. It can often lead to frequent changes in jobs, friend circles, relationships, goals and values. It can also cause changes in their understanding of sexual orientation.
Impulsive behaviour: People who display self-destructing and attention seeking behaviour may suffer from this condition. This disorder has been often associated with alcoholism, drug abuse and recklessness.
Suicidal behavior: People suffering from this disorder may often be associated with behaviour that physically harms them. They are also capable of following through on suicidal threats.
Mood swings: Extreme fluctuations in emotions and moods are a common experience or people suffering from borderline personality disorder. These mood swings usually start only a few minutes of a few hours unlike depression and other anxiety disorders.
Suspicion about everyone around: Borderline personality disorder can make a person struggle with suspicious thoughts about everyone around them and make them paranoid. They often feel out of touch with reality and can feel spaced out when under stress.

Borderline Personality Disorder - Signs and Symptoms!

Grief is a complex emotion that may give you side effects like guilt and make you struggle as you try to get through your everyday life. It is usually caused by some loss in life which may have to do with relationships, work or any other reason like a chronic physical ailment or disability. Complicated grief disorder is a condition where the extreme level of grief impairs a person and how he or she behaves in his or her daily life. It can have a debilitating effect and make a person helpless when it comes to dealing with everyday functions. It may continue for more than six months after the loss, and may even lead to depression and anxiety, among other complications.

Let us cast a glance of how this may be dealt with.

Psychotherapy: Cognitive-behavioral therapy and other forms of therapy can often help people who are suffering from this form of prolonged grief. With this kind of therapy, a patient can actually find an outlet to discuss the various emotions that the bereavement has brought on, and how he or she is not able to cope. The therapist, in this case, is usually a psychiatrist or a psychologist, who can then help in reprogramming the attitude of the patient so as to curb the grief and move on with life by embracing daily functions.
Group Therapy: In many cases, group therapy may also work. It is a natural human tendency to be grateful for what we have when we get to hear of higher and greater adversities. And when we see people suffering from those adversities actually taking steps to get over it, we can also get hugely motivated to do the same with our own lives. This is why group therapy is a powerful mechanism that many doctors and psychiatrists recommend for dealing with complicated grief therapy. This does not even need to be a formal therapy session. It can even be a club or a get together of people who have been through a similar problem.
Medication: In some extreme cases, the patients may be prescribed some antidepressants as well as beta blockers that can put their emotions right until they can deal with them in a better manner. Such medicines also help in numbing that part of the brain so that the patient may function in a more normal manner. Yet, care must be taken that the patient does not get addicted to such kind of medication.
Change of Focus: Travelling or picking up a new hobby can also have a positive effect on the person suffering from this condition. It can help in triggering the production of dormant hormones in a more normal way so that the patient may function in a more normal way, without the debilitating grief.


How To Deal With Complicated Grief Disorder?

Anger is an emotion found in every human being. There is nothing wrong with being angry. However, if it gets out of hand there might be serious consequences. Knowing a few things about anger management might help the next time you are struggling to manage anger. 

The Wrong Approach
Before knowing, what are the right things to do, it is necessary to know what doesn t work well. This will give a better insight on anger management. 

Often, we think suppressing anger might be the right thing to do. But, it is not. Trying not to react to a situation and keeping it under wraps, might affect your health and can even be the root cause of heart disease. However, suppressing it often lessens the intensity of the anger.
Just like suppressing it is not a good idea, venting it out completely is not the right approach as well. Venting might help you to cool down faster later on, but initially, it might hurt the other person and also have a negative impact on health. Venting anger occasionally will also make the person aggressive in nature.
Thinking or using words like always, never, should/shouldn t, must/mustn t do not usually help. Thinking about  he should never talk to me like that  or  they are always being unfair to me , brings about negativity and doesn t help in calming down.
The Right Approach

Counting to 10, the age old approach to anger management often helps in cooling down and giving a clear perspective. When we are angry, we end up saying and doing things we don t mean to. Counting gives us some time and helps us calm down a bit.
Breathe slowly when you are angry, say experts.  Instead of talking or reacting to the situation, just breathe in and out slowly. When you breathe out more, your body will calm down and make you relax.
Talk to someone who understands you when you are angry. Instead of venting out or suppressing it, talk it out with a friend or a family member. Tell them your feelings and why you are angry. This will help you a lot in relaxing. It works as a counselling session.
To manage anger, in the long run, one should always lead a healthy lifestyle. It means not just having a healthy diet, but also having proper sleep, not being stressed about anything, doing exercise, etc. 
Doing something creative often takes your mind away from angry feelings. Join a dance class, an art workshop, start keeping a journal, it will definitely help in the long run.
Leave the place immediately for few moments and drink water slowly when angry. Don't prolong the anger, come back and start conversation normally.

Anger Management - What Works and What Doesn't

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