
A new relationship involves a lot of weighing from both the sides. Learn what really matters to win people over in this post. When you want to build a new relationship, whether it is for work, business, personal, marriage, friendship etc there are several factors that help take off and bloom the relationship. These factors are broadly the same in different age groups as far as psychological impact matters. Some of the most important influential factors from a psychological point of view have been highlighted here. 

1. Presentation- When you want to draw someone into relationship with you for any reason, it is important that you present yourself at you best levels be it physical or mental. Like they say that the first impression is the best impression, your display of you strengths creates an impression that helps people decide what they want to do with you. This doesn't mean you should hide all your weaknesses but highlighting your strengths is as important as making your weaknesses clear. Always learn to put your best foot forward as sometimes that itself may not be enough. You can't really send your neighbour for your job interview!! There are many instances when people send different photographs in their applications and different ones appear for the exams. This is mere cheating and not winning.

2. Plan – Let people know what you want to do with them and what they can they can do with you. No one can say they don’t have a plan. There is always some plan. Knowing it strengthens why you want to have that relationship in the first place. Otherwise it's like something which is there but you can never want to do anything with! When you are honest with your plans and they workout as you described it, it creates confidence in relationship or else it is destroyed forever. You can cheat a person with your plans once, not forever.

3. Possibilities- Will this relationship bring me trouble? Obviously nobody wants to get into a relationship with anybody that brings them trouble be it physical or mental. Next question is whether it will benefit me? Small or big depends on person's needs. Some relationships neither bring us trouble nor benefits us, such relationships are better than the ones which can cause harm.

4. Potential – Question. Does this relationship you are trying to develop have any possibilities of growth a few or many years down the line. Obviously we have a lot of friends who wither by passing of time. Does this relationship have an expiry date irrespective of how well or bad it goes? Like when we join college we know for sure that the friends will be with us till the duration of the course and that's it. We will know that if we study together it will help us achieve great grades in college and hence a great life later. These kind of growth possibilities or possibilities of deterioration are important to be well aware of and will naturally decide the course of relationships.

5. Progress – No matter what our initial assessments are, how the relationships helps us fare in the outside world will ultimately decide the future of any relationship. Loss, sorrow, tragedy, degradation in any aspect of life, insults, injury, loss of health etc will never help any relationship continue or last.

6. Partnerships – When we want to build a relationship with someone, the best way to do it is to obviously partner with that person in as many activities as possible. The more interested a person is the more activities that person will involve you in and try to do it with you. This type of partnership activities, be it spending a few hours in the evening, or a few minutes on phone, or an association of months or years are a foolproof way to show you are interested. Conversely a person who doesn't partner with you in anything is extremely unlikely to ever have any sort of relationship with you. Partnership in activities is the only way to show and know that you are interested or the other person is interested respectively. After all chasing the moon, stars and rainbow are activities of people who don’t realize its out of their reach. Sensible people are busy with what their eyes see, hands feel, ears listen, tongue tastes and thinking perceives as appropriate.

7. Positioning attitudes- As a tree bends with the winds to prevent from cracking, we all have to be flexible with our attitudes towards each other. Being too rigid about our protocol on how relationships should run irrespective of the reality and circumstances of the person we are having a relationship with is naturally going to break relationships. After all a doctor who heals and prevents all illnesses is better than a doctor who abuses his patients for falling ill but never does anything for them. Eg: You get bed and good food in a hotel as well as at your home. A hotel will provide food only on payment of money, but family will provide it whenever your hungry. Hence hotels can never expect the same emotions as family can, and this is as natural as it should be. Hence be careful what you want from a relationship. Whether you want to be treated as a hotel or family is entirely how you play yourself with others. After all only families can expect loyalty not hotels.

8. Politeness- In any relationship, many years down the line, what our long term memory retains is how comfortable we were in that relationship. Even if we profit from a particular relationship, the fact that it shook us mentally and emotionally will never allow us to go back or retain that relationship. Life is short and the only thing that matters is to spend it comfortably. Not destroy our peace for some benefit that destroys our peace of mind.

9. Personation- While sending a representative of your organization for a client meeting may work in business, you cant really send a representative to meet you wife or kids at home. In personal relationship, lack of your physical presence obviously means that you don’t have time for them. In any relationship, individuality matters a lot. Just imagine, if all actors acted exactly the same in movies, why would you prefer any particular one over the other as your favourite? The nuances and differences in our personalities are what makes us all unique. We are not robots from a particular brand to behave exactly the same way. If a person in a relationship doesn't sense your individuality you are wasting their time by trying to have a relationship with them, especially a personal one.

10. Positive reinforcement- When we get into a relationship, it is important that we feel good about ourselves and what we are doing. If you feel like a shoplifter entering a shop, you will not feel good about that relationship. When a shopkeeper welcomes us, shows us his products, tells us their details and provides all the explanations on how we will be well off with the product, provides his guarantee for it, confirms its essence, many people buy it even if they don’t compulsively need it. It’s the same in relationships. On the same side if a shopkeeper is arrogant, avoidant, abusive, insulting etc you are very unlikely to buy anything in that shop because you are not sure that the shopkeeper means any good and will be happy with the shopkeeper s product. The experience of buying is as important as the product we buy. Nobody is happy about something they got when they weren't treated the right way or is interested in retaining it when they don’t get good service for it.

11. Persistence on all Ps – Obviously when we want relationships to last, we need to be persistent on all the above P's. Otherwise it wont take long for a relationship to be counted in “once upon a time”!! A simple conversation even if for a few minutes every now and then when you need it may make it seem that you are still there for a person. Without even that people may even find it hard to remember that they even had something to do with you sometime before keeping in mind the the numerous activities we involve daily to maintain our lifestyles.

“KNOWING IS DOING AND NOT KNOWING IS UNDOING EVEN IF DOING!”

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How To Win Over New Relationships

Post-traumatic stress disorder is a serious mental health condition that can affect every aspect of a person s life. With proper management, therapy and support, this disorder can be successfully treated. 

PTSD Causes 
Researchers usually believe that post-traumatic stress disorder is not caused by any one single factor. Rather, a variety of predispositions and risk factors, work together that leads to the development of PTSD following a traumatic event. The most commonly cited causes are:

Genetic Factors: Anxiety disorders are hereditary and PTSD also tends to run in families. People having first-degree relatives struggling with any anxiety disorder are at a higher risk of developing the disorder themselves. While it is not a definitive cause for PTSD, exposure to a traumatic event does make a person more vulnerable to developing the disorder.
Environmental Causes: Those having a history of trauma or stress are more susceptible to PTSD than those who do not have a similar history. Children growing up in families marred by addiction problems are more predisposed to such a condition.
Brain Structures: Certain areas of the brain that are believed to regulate fear and emotions are varied in people diagnosed with this condition as compared to them who have not developed PTSD after a traumatic event.
Psychological Factors: People struggling with certain types of mental disorders, notably depression and anxiety are at a greater risk of developing post-traumatic stress disorder.

PTSD is caused due to exposure to a traumatic incident or frightening event such as sexual assault, natural disaster, war, accidents or the threat of death/death or any grave illness to one s self or a dear one. Post-traumatic stress disorder is a lifelong consequence of any such extreme traumatic event that affects a person s ability to deal with such an incident.

Most of the times, people having been exposed to trauma develop feelings of shock, fear, anger, anxiety and guilt.
These reactions are completely normal in regard to an unnatural event and eventually fade over time. A person diagnosed with PTSD develops unusual strong feelings post such an event that they hinder the person from leading a meaningful (normal) life. Sadly, the symptoms of PTSD don t fade with time and these feelings amplify till the person is so overwhelmed that they are unable to function.
This disorder can occur at any age. It has even been observed during the first year of an individual s life. Symptoms generally begin to appear by the first three months following the traumatic incident but it can also start showing up months or years later.
Certain individuals who have been exposed to a disturbing experience might develop symptoms of PTSD directly after experiencing such an event. This is known as acute stress disorder. People having acute stress disorder experience a varying amalgamation and duration of the symptoms, but most of them usually recover within three months of the causative event.
Some people with an acute stress disorder experience prolonged periods of symptoms that may be triggered by memories of the traumatic incident.


Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - 4 Things That Can Lead To It!

Being a perfectionist is not wrong until it does not stop you from working according to your priorities. However, when you struggle to go on with your regular routine and seem to concentrate on one particular thing, again and again, it is time you seek expert advice.

Obsessive-compulsive disorder or OCD is a medical term that refers to obsessions or excessive thoughts leading to compulsions of repetitive behaviours. A person suffering from OCD usually has recurring thoughts that he or she has no control over, which leads to developing uncountable urge of repeating behaviours over and over.

The condition is long-lasting and chronic, and when not attended to as early as possible, usually brings in difficulties to the patient in leading a normal life. Continue reading to know about its symptoms and how it can be diagnosed.

Symptoms
The symptoms of OCD can be divided into two types, symptoms of obsession and the other is symptoms of compulsion.

Obsession Symptoms:

Spending more than normal time on one s obsessions, which results in disrupting one s social, professional, and personal activities.
Having the same images, urges, and thoughts again and again which the patient has no control over.
Losing the control over his/her anxiety and anger and acting on the urge of harming others or one s self.
Having unwanted and inappropriate sexual thoughts, especially developing obsessions with incest and homosexuality.
Being extremely obsessive and concerned about the fear of contamination that includes threats from the germs, dirt and even body fluid.
Compulsion Symptoms:

Constant cleaning and washing, especially washing one's own hands again and again.
In cases of mental compulsions, tendency to repetitively review events mentally, repetitive praying for harm prevention, etc.
Repetitively checking of the body parts or things around to be sure that nothing has happened to them.
Repeating routines such as reading the same page over and over.
Diagnosis
Diagnosis of obsessive-compulsive behaviour may consist one or various medical examinations that include,

Physical examination: Physical examination is performed in order to eliminate the probability of the presence of any other complications or illnesses.
Psychological evaluation: Psychological evaluation is all about discussing the feelings, thoughts, symptoms, and behaviour of the patients.
Laboratory-based tests: Usually, a complete blood count or CDC is included in the lab tests where the presence of drug or alcohol and the function of the thyroid is analysed.
Reference to the OCD diagnostic criteria: This step includes referring to the standard OCD diagnostic criteria to determine whether the patient is suffering from OCD or not.
Affecting people of all ages, OCD traps its victims in a cycle of compulsions and obsessions. Though a complete cure to this illness has not yet been discovered, still, with right treatment at the right time can be very effective in controlling of the symptoms while helping the patient to lead a normal life.

Depending upon the condition of the patient, the severity, and type of OCD, a psychiatrist can offer the best treatment in the form of therapies or talk sessions, or medications or a combination of both.

A Brief Overview Of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Its Symptoms, And Diagnosis!

Schizophrenia is a neurological disorder that affects an individual s ability to feel, think, or behave properly. Schizophrenia makes it hard for a person to tell reality from fantasy.

The symptoms of schizophrenia are:

  Hearing voices in the head
  Hallucinations
  Fearfulness
  The urge to withdraw from society and social activities
  Difficulty concentrating

Although one can control the symptoms of schizophrenia with antipsychotic drugs, therapy can drastically improve their quality of life. The therapy combines both counselling and medication. Several types of therapy can help a schizophrenic. The most commonly practised are:

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

This is a kind of interactive therapy session, which works only if a collective relation between the therapist and the individual suffering from schizophrenia is established. It is about analyzing the problem and setting goals to overcome it.

  The therapist focuses on the psychotic elements of schizophrenia (illusions and hallucinations) and helps the schizophrenic separate delusions and reality. It starts simply with learning to de-stress. CBT includes behavioural experiments, reality tests, cognitive restructuring.

  The schizophrenic is taught to avoid being confrontational and not to fear the psychotic experiences. Therapy helps strike a balance between the two extremes of psychotic and non-psychotic experiences.



Art Therapy

Art Therapy acts as a unique medium of expression for a schizophrenic.

  A person suffering from schizophrenia often finds it difficult to express himself/herself. With the patient guidance of a therapist, the individual uses paint, clay or other materials to voice their thoughts, feelings and fears.

  Art therapy also incorporates music, poetry, drama (any art form that the schizophrenic is comfortable with). Art Therapy works in groups as well. Interacting in a group teaches social skills. Communicating with people suffering from similar problems helps them get a better perspective and reduces the symptoms associated with the condition.

Family Therapy

Families are often confused about how to deal with the symptoms of schizophrenia. Family therapy is about establishing a bond between the schizophrenic and his/her family.

  Most importantly, bonding with the family helps gives an emotional boost to the individual. Knowing that she/he has the family s love and support brings down hallucinatory episodes. Surveys suggest that family therapy helps improve the quality of life for a schizophrenic.

Therapy can help suppress the terrifying hallucinations and illusions and help a schizophrenic cope with his/her condition. However, at the end of the day, what a schizophrenic needs more than therapy and anti-psychotic drugs are your understanding and support.

Schizophrenia - Symptoms And Therapeutic Treatments Of It!

How Smoking Impacts Your Organs

As you inhale cigarette smoke, about 7000 carcinogens stir the crevices of your body. In India, about 3,00,000 people die every year due to smoking-related issues.

Here's a list of 5 such organs, which are the most affected by cigarette smoke.

1. Your lungs - Your lungs are probably the first organs to bear the wrath of cigarette smoke. Majority of the lung cancer cases are due to smoking. Other diseases include bronchitis and emphysema. This smoke paralyzes the cilia lining the inner walls so much so that it overproduces mucous. When the mucous builds, respiration suffers. Asthma and cancer follow.

2. Your Skin - Your skin also gets affected up to a huge extent if you smoke. You could have deep circles under your eyes, wrinkles on your skin, and stretch marks, if you continue smoking over time. Also, there lies the risk of major health issues like skin warts, psoriasis, skin cancer, and wounds, which may take longer to heal.

3. Your Penis - Studies revealed that you can take longer for an erection and find it difficult to maintain it if you are a heavy smoker. Studies have also revealed that men who quit smoking had longer and firmer erections.

4. Your Liver - Smoking increases the chances of you suffering from liver cancer dramatically. According to studies, half of the liver cancer cases are due to smoking. Obesity can also take place if you're a heavy smoker.

5. Your Eyes - Smoking affects your eyes to the extent of making you blind. Partial vision loss, glaucoma, cataracts, dry eye syndrome, and diabetic retinopathy are some of the other diseases you are susceptible to if you smoke.

Despite the negative effects, quitting smoking can save you from all of these potential health hazards.

Here are some ways to help you quit smoking.

1. Nicotine Replacement Therapy - There are a few nicotine replacement tools in the form of nicotine nasal sprays and nicotine inhaler, which you can use to quit smoking.

2. Chew on something - You should try to chew on some candy, or a gum, or anything crunchy and satisfying once you start getting restless for a cigarette or any other form of nicotine. That usually helps.

3. Relaxation techniques - If you are resisting tobacco strongly, it can be very stressful indeed. Take a break from whatever you are doing and go out for a walk, practice muscle relaxation, yoga or deep breathing to keep the craving out of the way.

4. Get involved in some physical work - Getting involved in some work will surely go a long way in reducing your craving. You can also try out physical exercises like squats, running, or jogging. Otherwise, you can also indulge in some needlework, or anything, which involves concentration or physical work.



Why Smoking Impacts Your Crucial Organs the Most?

Have you ever noticed bar and clubs promoting energy drinks? You may have also bought energy drinks and alcohol, and tried mixing them. But what you don't probably know is consuming energy drinks with alcohol can be much riskier than drinking only alcohol. Since, very few people drink alcohol neat, a small shot of alcohol is usually mixed with juices, colas or more recently energy drinks to make a cocktail. While it is well-known fact that the sugar in these mixers is responsible for increasing the effect of alcohol on the body and weight gain associated with drinking, when energy drinks are mixed with alcohol, it can have an even more lethal effect on our bodies.

Studies show that this mix causes the brain to react in a similar way to how it behaves when in contact with cocaine. It can also cause permanent brain damage. This is because it stimulates the release of a protein cell known as FosB. This protein has the ability to permanently change the chemical connections inside the brain.

Some of the short-term effects of combining alcohol with energy drinks are:

Digestive troubles
Nausea
Loss of appetite
Depression
Hallucinations
Erratic sleep patterns
Violent behavior
Many of these effects can be a result of alcohol consumption as well and hence, it may not be attributed to the energy drinks being used as mixers. Regular consumption of such cocktails can increase your body s tolerance of this combination and make a person drink more. This can lead to long-term effects such as:

Malnutrition
Respiratory problems
Tooth decay and abcesses
Psychosis
Liver damage
Kidney troubles
Heart palpitations
Consuming alcohol tends to make a person feel sleepy and tired. However, when this alcohol is mixed with energy drinks, the caffeine in the energy drinks keep the person feeling energized and masks the effect of alcohol. This leads to a condition known as being  wide-awake drunk . In such a situation, the person begins to underestimate how much alcohol he or she is consuming. This creates a false sense of security and hampers with their judgement, balance and coordination. It also increases the risk of behaving erratically and getting into dangerous situations.

In addition to caffeine, energy drinks also have a high sugar content. A small can of energy drink can contain up to 30 grams of sugar. This is equivalent to about half the ideal amount of sugar one should consume in a day. The effect of consuming so much sugar is a fluctuation in blood sugar levels. If this fluctuation persists for a long time, it could lead to conditions such as diabetes and insulin resistance. Thus, along with understanding the ill effects of alcohol, it is also necessary to keep the effects of mixers in mind while concocting cocktails for your next weekend bash. 

Alcohol With Energy Drinks - Why It Should Never Be Mixed?

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