MISUNDERSTANDINGS AND ARGUMENTS? CHANGE THEM INTO FLOWING CONVERSATION
Conflicts and misunderstandings occur at all levels of interaction – at work, among friends, within families and between relationship partners. When conflict occurs, the relationship may be weakened or strengthened. Thus, conflict is a critical event in the course of a relationship. Arguments  and misunderstandings  can cause resentment, hostility and perhaps the ending of the relationship. If it is handled well, however, it can be productive – leading to deeper understanding, mutual respect and closeness. The health of any relationship is gauged by how the conflicts are resolved, rather than the number of conflicts between the participants. 
Conflicts run all the way from minor, unimportant differences to disputes which can threaten the existence of a relationship. Conflicts with a loved one or a long-term friend are, of course, different from negotiating with someone who does not care about your needs, like a stranger or a salesperson. 

 Principles that underscores all successful conflict resolution. 
1. Both parties must view their conflict as a problem to be solved together so that both parties have the feeling of winning.
2. Each person must participate actively in the resolution and make an effort and commitment to find answers which are as fair as possible to both. 

We may get so caught up with our own immediate interests that we damage our relationships. If we disregard the position of the other person, if fear and power are used to win, or if we always have to get our own way, the other person will feel hurt and the relationship may be wounded. Similarly, if we always surrender just to avoid conflict, we give the message to the other person that it is acceptable to be bullied and our needs don’t matter. Our feeling of self-worth suffers, resentment surfaces, and we feel frustrated in the relationship. Instead, it is healthier if both parties can remain open, honest, assertive and respectful of the other position. Mutual trust and respect, as well as a positive, constructive attitude, are fundamental necessities in relationships that matter.

SOME EFFECTIVE STRATEGIES TO HOLD EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATIONS:
1. INITIAL AGREEMENT: The other person may be very angry with you and may be having loads of evidence to prove himself right. At that time, instead of arguing your position, simply agree at that time because there will be a grain of truth if nothing else. This doesn’t mean that you are giving up your values and principles. Sometimes its important to diffuse the emotional charge before working out on the differences. Sometimes its ok to “lose” individually in order to “win” together in the end.
2. EMPATHY: Sometimes putting yourself  in the other persons shoes and seeing the problem from their perspective helps build bridges. You could say,” I feel that you must be very upset with me for behaving like that with you, I should have been more considerate”. Half the battle is won and the other participant feels validated and will be more willing to listen to your tale of woes more amicably.
3. ASK QUESTIONS: When you ask questions, it shows that you care and are interested to resolve the problem at hand. Please note that while asking questions, be watchful of your words and tone. Asking exploratory  questions about the other persons thoughts and feelings rather than probing and insulting questions can take you miles on the way to effective resolution. For eg. “Is there anything that you would like me to know about this problem”?
4. USING “I” STATEMENTS: Take responsibility for your own thoughts and feelings rather than blaming the other person for making you feel like that. This decreases the chance that the other person will become defensive. For example, “I feel pretty upset that this thing has come between us.” This statement is much more effective than saying, “You have made me feel very upset.” 
5. COMPLIMENTS: Find something nice and genuine to say about the other person, even if the other is angry with you. Show a respectful attitude. For example, “I genuinely respect you for having the courage to bring this problem to me. I admire your strength and your caring attitude.” 

A RATIONAL APPROACH TO RESOLVING CONFLICTS:
Here is a model that may help in resolving interpersonal conflicts. 
1. Identify the Problem. Have a discussion to understand both sides of the problem. The goal at this initial stage is to say what you want and to listen to what the other person wants. Define the things that you both agree on, as well as the ideas that have caused the disagreement. It is important to listen actively to what the other is saying, use “I” statements and avoid blame. 
2. Come Up With Several Possible Solutions. This is the brainstorming phase. Drawing on the points that you both agree on and your shared goals, generate a list of as many ideas as you can for solving the problem, regardless of how feasible they might be. Aim toward quantity of ideas rather than quality during this phase, and let creativity be your guide.
3. Evaluate These Alternative Solutions. Now go through the list of alternative solutions to the problem, one by one. Consider the pros and cons of the remaining solutions until the list is narrowed down to one or two of the best ways of handling the problem. It is important for each person to be honest in this phase. The solutions might not be ideal for either person and may involve compromise. 
4. Decide on the Best Solution. Select the solution that seems mutually acceptable, even if it is not perfect for either party. As long as it seems fair and there is a mutual commitment to work with the decision, the conflict has a chance for resolution. 
5. Implement the Solution. It is important to agree on the details of what each party must do, who is responsible for implementing various parts of the agreement, and what to do in case the agreement starts to break down. 
6. Continue to Evaluate the Solution. Conflict resolutions should be seen as works in progress. Make it a point to ask the other person from time to time how things are going. Something unexpected might have come up or some aspect of the problem may have been overlooked. Your decisions should be seen as open to revision, as long as the revisions are agreed upon mutually. 

Keep in mind that differences will come up in any relationship just because you two are different individuals with different perspectives, ideologies, attitudes and perceptions. Too much similarity in personality and working styles may be comforting but can be very boring and uninspiring overtime. On the other hand, differences can bring change, novelty and an added spice to the relationship. Two very different people can pool their different strengths and work together as a stronger team. Though, extreme differences may overtime sour the relationship and make living or working together difficult. You also need to look out for an emotionally or physically abusive relationship, which is based on power differential rather than respect and trust. A person may then choose to opt out after an amicable “goodbye” or "agree to disagree".























Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an abnormal condition of the mind that develops when a person is exposed to certain traumatic events in life such as accidents, sexual assault or warfare.

The major symptoms of PTSD are:

Reliving the traumatic experience over and over again; this leads to severe and long-term mental distress.
Recurring dreams about the events.
Provocation of traumatic thoughts by the slightest event that causes distress to the individual.
Avoiding memories and thoughts that might remind them of the event.
Developing a negative view of themselves and the world.
Developing social or specific phobias.
Treatment

Medication and antidepressants: Medicines such as paroxetine, sertraline and selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) help the individual address insomnia-related problems that occur due to PTSD and suppress nightmares.
Psychotherapy: This form of therapy is used to cure both mental health conditions (such as obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety and depression) as well as emotional problems that result from PTSD. Skilled mental health experts are needed for this form of treatment to be administered. They would listen to each individual patiently and provide effective strategies to give solutions to the problems. Some of these therapies are:
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy: This therapy enables the individual to adapt to changes and recognize thought patterns which lead to irrational and negative behaviour and actions.
Exposure therapy: This therapy causes the affected individual to first become anxious by exposing him/her to the traumatic memories, situations and objects by simulating them. The therapy helps the person to overcome his/her fears and become comfortable in the same environment that had previously caused fear and anxiety.
Group therapy: This popular and effective form of therapy allows the individual to share his/her feelings, fears and thoughts with a group of people who have themselves experienced similar trauma in their lives. Sharing such experiences helps reduces stress levels.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - Ways It Can Be Managed!

If you are living with bipolar disorder then you will need a combination of skills to successfully combat each day of your life. Educating yourself about the disorder is the first step, however, there are certain tips that can come in handy on numerous occasions. 

Here are 5 tips that will really help you out:

Educate yourself about the disorder: The first thing you need to do is educate yourself about the details of bipolar disorder. Find out about the symptoms, read about the causes and the diagnosis procedure and ultimately find out everything about the treatment. Your doctor will provide you all the information and suggest you all the required treatment procedures. However, don t try to self-diagnose and self-treat your disorder without an expert opinion.
Stay connected with your friends and loved ones: Isolation is not the best way to handle bipolar disorder. The more you isolate yourself the higher the risk of mood swings. This lack of connection will lead to depression and that should be avoided at all cost. So try to be as connected to the world as possible. Talk to your family members, hangout with your friends, spend time with people around you; and you will feel a lot better.
Track the symptoms: Keep a daily log of your moods, thoughts and behaviors. This is a fantastic way to track the symptoms of the disorder. This will be revealing in the end, as when you present them before the doctor, he/she will be able to easily diagnose your condition. Try to keep track of particular incidents that may trigger any stress and change in behavior and log the mood episodes that you may have experienced pertaining to those triggers.
Employ coping mechanisms: It is not always possible to call on your doctor or counselor, so try to develop your own coping mechanism with the help of your doctor or counselor. Your mood episodes are going to be spontaneous so the coping mechanisms should be kept in mind. It can be anything that induces calmness in you such as staying connected, happy thoughts, music and any other healthy habits that captures your interest and engages you in something else.
Create a crisis plan: Create a contact list that will include the people, serially, who should be contacted in case of an emergency or a crisis attack. If you feel like you are experiencing any symptoms then contact them for help. When you are out of control, you will not have much time, so it is also advised to keep emergency numbers on speed dial to get yourself hospitalized without any time loss. Add your loved ones to the emergency contact list.


Suffering from Bipolar Disorder - 5 Things That Can Really Help!

World Alzheimer s Day is celebrated on the 21st of September each year. A number of organizations, from all over the world concentrate on raising the awareness about Alzheimer s disease and dementia. Alzheimer s disease is a very common type of dementia. It falls under the group of disorders in which mental functioning gets impaired. Life for an Alzheimer s patients is quite difficult, but by following the following tips, you can support yourself and will also help you to cope with it. 

You have to accept the changes and accept that life will continue getting difficult. Instead of trying to cover your difficulties for protection from embarrassment, you should face the fact. You also have to accept the changes in your physical abilities and adapt to skills, which are beneficial.
You should develop some ideal coping strategies. Try to be occupied and involved and respond to the challenges you face in everyday life. By practicing the coping skills you will be able to gain a sense of control in your life.
Try to identify stuff. Make a list of all the tasks which seem challenging to you and try to develop coping strategies for these tasks. Prioritize your tasks and determine whether it is really necessary to overcome certain tasks. You should also strategize solutions and come up with solutions which would suit you best.
You should set realistic goals and expectations for yourself and use the coping skills to deal with difficult tasks. In case of very challenging tasks, do not hesitate to take help.
A daily routine or plan is required for keeping a track of several tasks. A schedule reduces the amount of time you spend to figure out something, simplifying your task and also prevents mistakes.
Always approach one task at a time and take enough time to complete tasks. Do not give up on challenging tasks and take breaks to figure things out.
Always remember that you have more than a single chance to solve problems. If one chance fails, you should adopt new strategies and try again and again with better assessment.
You should identify the triggers which cause anxiety and stress. Knowing the causes will allow you to plan in advance so that you can prevent them.
Keep in mind that your family, friends, pets, will power and prayers are sources of great strength and will help you get past any obstacle.
You should accept help from others and do not hesitate or think about being dependent on others.
You should take the advice from your psychiatrist or from Alzheimer Association National Early-Stage Advisors in order to understand the challenges such as medications, management of schedules and dealing with emotional or relationship changes.

Alzheimer's - 10 Tips to Help Dementia Patients Cope with their Problem

Cerebral Palsy (CG) is a neurological disorder caused by an injury to the brain or a brain malformation that occurs while the child s brain is still developing   in the mother s womb before birth, during birth, or immediately after birth.

This disorder affects the child s movement and muscle coordination and control. It also affects his:

Reflexes
Balance
Posture
Motor skills and
Oral motor functions
In easy to understand language, CG can impact the child s ability to walk, talk, sit, do simple tasks like eating, combing hair, talking, and other activities we take for granted. The physical impairment caused by cerebral palsy can affect all limbs, the face and head, or it may just affect one limb. Since CG affects muscles and a child s ability to control them, common symptoms include muscles that contract too much, too little, or all at the same time, leading to limbs that are stiff and forced into awkward positions. Other complications also arise such as intellectual impairment, seizures, or vision/ hearing and speech impairment.

How does Speech Therapy help?
Speech problems affect more than half of all children with cerebral palsy as they have difficulty controlling the muscles in their face, throat, neck and head. Apart from speaking, this also affects chewing and swallowing. It can also cause drooling and the ability to learn, difficulty hearing and understanding spoken language.

This is where speech and language therapy comes in. Speech therapy improves a child s speech and communication by strengthening the muscles used for speech. It also improves understanding of speech and language as well as help with swallowing disorders, like dysphagia.

Speech therapy helps exponentially as when children improve their speech and communication, they are able to express their needs, share their thoughts and interact with others, leading to an overall improvement in their overall quality of life.

Speech therapy can help with the following:

Listening
Articulation of words
Pronunciation
Fluency
Sound and word formation
Language and vocabulary development
Breath control
Chewing
Swallowing
Speech muscle coordination
Apart from this, the other primary benefits are boosting self esteem, socialization, independence and reducing shyness. 

Exercises used in Speech Therapy
Speech therapy treatment usually consists of exercises tailored to a child s specific needs. Different exercises are used in speech therapy like:

Articulation therapy: The therapist uses language cards to help focus attention on specific sounds to encourage the child to make sounds while looking in the mirror to help him understand how his mouth moves.
Blowing exercises: The therapist encourages the child to blow bubbles or a whistle to train the mouth muscles to produce sounds.
Breathing exercises: Work is exclusively on inhalation and exhalation to strengthen the diaphragm.
Jaw exercises: The child is encouraged to eat foods that require extra chewing to strengthen jaw muscles.
Language and word association: The therapist uses flashcards with different words and sounds written on them.

Cerebral Palsy (CP) - How Speech Therapy Can Help You?

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an anxiety disorder which develops due to a terrifying traumatic incident. Traumatic events like violent personal assaults, man-made disasters, accidents, military combat etc. can trigger PTSD. 

What are the symptoms of PTSD?
People with PTSD mostly re-experience the whole incident repeatedly in the form of flashback episodes and nightmares. This happens more when they are exposed to the events or objects which are reminiscent of the trauma. The other symptoms are emotional numbness, sleep disturbances, depression, anxiety and irritability leading to outbursts of anger on others. People with PTSD feel intense guilt mostly. Anniversaries of such an event can also trigger symptoms of PTSD. When these symptoms last for more than a month, the person is diagnosed with PTSD.

Who will most likely develop PTSD?
You do not need to be in the military to suffer from PTSD. People who have suffered child abuse during school, who have had traumatic experiences are more likely to develop the condition. Other factors that may cause PTSD are still under research.

When does PTSD occur?
PTSD can occur at any age, given the intensity and frequency of symptoms. The symptoms typically are seen within 3 months post a traumatic event, although it may not begin until next year. Once the PTSD symptoms appear, the severity and duration of the illness may vary.

What are the treatments available for PTSD?
Cognitive-behavioral therapy, group therapy, and exposure therapy have been very effective in treating PTSD where the patient gradually and repeatedly relives the frightening experience under controlled surroundings which helps him/her work through the trauma. Medicines also help ease associated symptoms such as depression and anxiety.

Do other illnesses accompany PTSD?
PTSD can present with many associated conditions like depression, alcohol or substance abuse, anxiety disorder etc. Certain symptoms like headaches, gastrointestinal ailments, immune system issues, dizziness, chest pain or discomfort in other parts of the body are common. To treat PTSD entirely, it is necessary to take these symptoms into consideration as well.

PTSD is a difficult condition to deal with. If you or someone you know happens to suffer from PTSD, the first thing is to seek help. Having PTSD does not make you weak. All you need is a little help and support from your family and friends, to make you feel better. Happy Mind, Healthy You!

5 Interesting Facts About Post Traumatic Stress Disorder!

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