Anger is good. It protects you. But intense, uncontrolled anger may destroy valuable relationships. Anger is a result of anxiety and fear. When we assume that our expectations will not be met, we become anxious. When we feel unsure about our own capabilities we become anxious. This anxiety creates fear. Anxiety comes from our beliefs. All beliefs can be modified.

Anger has lots of energy. Avoid arguments/confrontations when you are very angry. When you are very angry you are likely to use rough language which may damage your relations and you are likely to behave impulsively. All this you might regret later on. Following are a few techniques which will help you to manage your anger in difficult situations :

Sit down and have a glass of water, slowly. This will help you to calm down a little.
Avoid or go away from that room or situation. Tell the people concerned, that you are angry and would like to discuss it some other time.
Deep breathing exercises help a lot. Close your eyes, take 10 deep breaths, turn your attention towards your body. See what is happening to your body. Tell your body muscles to relax. If your heart is beating fast, if you are breathing fast, continue deep breathing, till it normalises.
Now understand what is making you angry. Understand your own anxiety and fear related to the issue.
Let the other person know how you are  feeling . Start your statements, I feel hurt/insulted/let down/neglected etc. when you do this , instead of saying  You hurt/neglect me . When you express your feeling in this manner, the other person does not feel blamed, which makes the other person more receptive.
Focus on the current issue, don t bring in past situations.
Tell the other person, what you want or expect, instead of telling what you do not want. E.G. Instead of saying  I don t want you to go out now , say  I would like you to stay at home today .
Listen carefully what the other person wants to tell you. Give others a chance to voice their opinions.
Make an eye contact and be firm but polite while communicating your point of view.
Understand everyone s responsibility in the situation. Try to see, what is your share in the problematic situation? Work on that.
Understand what change you want.
Have realistic expectations from others and also from yourself.

Anger Management - 12 Tips To Help You!

In most Indian homes, a family is not complete with just one child. Until about a couple of decades ago, a family with a single child was very rare. The most common response would be 'with whom the child will play'. Between the siblings, there is always so much love. Starting from getting attention from the parent to education at all stages of life, this is one relationship which just grows and grows. While it definitely is a feel-good factor, scientifically too, it has been proven to have multiple benefits.

Read on to know some benefits of having siblings and how it can help you stay healthy and positive.

A constant companion: With a sibling around, there is no need to look for a play or study companion. There is always one available right in the same home. This provides for a happy, healthy equation with a lot of give and take that just extends through life.
Continuous learning environment: With a sibling around, the learning never stops. There is a constant teacher/mentor-student relationship with the elder one having an upper hand and trying to teach the younger one all sorts of things from using a chalk to spoon to math to magic.
Sharing begins at home: Whether it is your toys or colours, stationary or chocolates, siblings share a lot of stuff and so from a very young age, there is a behaviour that encourages sharing of all sorts of things. Studies have shown that children with siblings show a lot more sympathy and are more open to sharing things as compared to single children.
Builds selflessness: The next time you see two siblings, notice how the elder one is always so protective of the younger one. The elder one is willing to give up their chocolate just so the younger one smiles. Similarly, the younger one also would give up a toy so that the elder one is happy. This selflessness is ingrained in children with siblings, which extends into their other relationships too later in life.
Tougher individuals: Problem solving is something which gets built in early in life when children have siblings. This comes in handy later in life too, which makes them tougher individuals. They are also better skilled at negotiating, good at setting and achieving goals, managing relationships (both professional and personal), and are so more successful.
The relationship with a sibling just continues through life. The above are some pointers as to how having a sibling makes for a happy, healthier, and positive life. Anyone with a sibling would definitely vouch for these!!

How Having Siblings Can Keep You Positive and Healthy?

Personality refers to the enduring and habitual patterns of behaviour, cognition, emotion, motivation and ways of relating to others. In simpler terms, it's the persona we have for the world to see and interact with. If these patterns or ways of relating with others become nonadaptive or pathological, a personality disorder develops.

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is such a disorder of personality that causes mood swings, self-esteem issues, impulsive behavior and recurrent self-harm behaviour. It is very difficult to lead a normal life with these varied psychological issues.

The symptoms begin to appear from early childhood but they take a serious form only when one reaches adulthood. Issues with behavior and emotion are difficult to treat, people suffering from this illness should be willing to spend a lot of time and be dedicated towards his/her recovery. Through treatments and therapies, they do make significant improvements over time.

Causes

The exact cause of borderline personality disorder is not known but various reasons have been hypothesised as possible aetiology. Neuro-chemical disturbance in the brain, genetic vulnerability, some kind of childhood trauma like abandonment, death, neglect and/ or sexual abuse are probable causes of the disease. Prolonged and chronic stress/ anxiety may also lead to triggering of BPD symptomatology in vulnerable individuals later in life.

Symptoms

Prolonged dysthymia/ sadness
Feeling lonely/ misfit
Emotional dysregulation or Frequent mood swings
Significant interpersonal issues
Self-Injurious behaviour like making cuts in skin, burning, pricking etc

These symptoms are warning signs of borderline personality disorder and should be paid attention to:

Abandonment issue - People suffering from BPD have serious abandonment issues. They have an intense fear that they would be left alone and often act out to restrict their love ones from leaving. Sometimes their strategy is to not get too close to protect themselves from being left alone, so they appear aloof.
Disturbed self-image - People have self-esteem issues, they sometimes love or hate themselves or see themselves as evil. They have unclear goals, views, beliefs and often end up changing their friends, lovers, jobs, sexual identity frequently.
Dysfunctional relationships - It is very difficult to maintain a normal relationship for people with personality disorder. They tend to have quick short-lived relationships and get put off very easily which leads to a lot of heartbreak.
Suicidal tendencies and frequent self-harm behaviour like cutting skin using blades/ sharp objects are common.

Drugs and alcohol abuse, eating disorders and sexual promiscuity are other forms of self-destructive behaviour commonly encountered in this population. Extreme aggression, delusions, transitional Psychotic states are other possible symptoms of BPD.

Love and support from family and friends are crucial for patients suffering from this disease. Prolonged counseling sessions, therapies and the effort to break away from the chronic gloomy thoughts will definitely lead one to a better life.

All about Borderline Personality Disorder

It might happen that you may not find your child, at twelve months to two years of age, at the same level as their peers in verbal communication. You think it's just a developmental problem they are facing and put off seeking professional advice; an intrinsically wrong step to take, because your child might be suffering from Speech Delay.
Delayed speech, or alalia, can be roughly defined as a delay in the development and use of the biological mechanisms that produce speech.
The symptoms of speech delay are roughly categorized into age related groups, generally beginning at the age of 12 months and continuing through the early adolescence, and they are:
1. Age-12 months
a. It is indeed a symptom if your child cannot point at objects or cannot manage gestures, such as waving good-bye.
b. Another symptom is that if your child does not prefer to communicate verbally as much as his/her peers.
2. Age-15-18 months
a. If your child is unable to pronounce familiar syllables or simply cannot call you even by this time, it's a worrying symptom.
b. You find your child unable to, or simply not reciprocating to 'no', 'hello', 'hi', 'bye'.
c. If your child is unable to extend his/her vocabulary up to 15 words by fifteen months, then it's a symptom.
3. Age-2-4 years
a. You find your child unable to spontaneously produce speech and words.
b. Another worrying symptom is if your child is lacking consonant sounds at the beginning and end of words while speaking.
c. If you still find your child unable to form simple sentences and words, then it is indeed a troubling symptom, confirming the disorder.
The causes for the speech delay disorder are:
1. A primary cause can be physical disruption in parts of the mouth such lips or palate, which may be deformed.
2. Another serious cause can be an oral-motor dysfunction which is the disruption in the creation of the specific area of the brain which deals with speech and communication.
3. The disorder can also be attributed to impairment in the development of the child's intellectual, receptive and expressive abilities.
4. There can also be psychological causes involving school environment and peer relationships which might lead to disruption of speech patterns and reluctance in speech expression and development.

Causes and symptoms of Delayed Speech

The activity of delaying or putting off something is known as procrastination. Even the best individuals battle with it consistently. However, some people accomplish something that the majority of us do not- they push past it. They do not permit it to influence their work. They develop brilliant and beneficial techniques to break past mental obstructions and remain productive. Here are a few ways with which you can beat procrastination:

Try to start: Starting something can be very difficult. However, in case that you can get over that part, you will have some level of energy. Even your brain will probably goad you to continue dealing with the task. This happens because of a mental phenomenon called the Zeigarnik impact. It says that unfinished tasks will probably stay in your memory. This is exactly why planned things and to-do lists consistently appear in your mind until you finish them.
Separate huge tasks into smaller assignments: Enormous tasks can frighten you, so you put them off. By taking that huge task and separating it into smaller assignments, you can decrease your burden make a start. This could include concentrating on one part of the research to begin with.
Ask yourself  why? : It is easier to inspire yourself to accomplish something you value. In case you are attempting to complete something, why not spend a couple of minutes asking yourself precisely why you need to do it and why it is so important to you. Weighing out the positives and negatives of the task and its benefits for you, can make you decide and perform better.
Attempt to take a break: For those who procrastinate out of having worked too much, it does not mean you have to complete the task at once. This is known as the "sunk cost bias." The "sunk cost bias" influences players, speculators, and even a procrastinator. They feel that the task will need to be completed now and cannot be completed in the future. In some cases, a task simply does not mean you have to work on it more and more after hours.
Go easy on yourself: To beat procrastination, you should be strict with yourself. However, that is not what science says. In case that you have procrastinated till now, you will probably begin on time going ahead. You need to show yourself some sympathy for your previous laziness instead of thrashing yourself about it.
Self-control is an important quality many successful individuals have. Having self-control permits you to carefully understand why you are procrastinating and can likewise, work towards it. When you understand why you are doing so, it will be easier for you to make a plan to beat it. This will allow you to see the underlying cause of your problem as well.

Procrastination - 5 Ways You Can Beat It!

When you hear the word  schizophrenia , the first thing that comes to mind are those serial killers shown on the TV or you call it split personality. But that is not the true meaning of it. It is not split personality or some kind of violent illness. Schizophrenia is a severe chronic mental illness which makes it difficult to differentiate between what is real and what is false.

As this is a mental illness, you will not be able to see any changes physically. You need to understand the symptoms of schizophrenia in order to know if a person is suffering from this problem. There are different kinds of symptoms that are used for diagnosing schizophrenia, but they all differ from person to person. Also, the symptoms that you see now, may not be seen later as the disease progresses. There are different types of schizophrenia and each has different symptoms.

Here is a list of the different types of schizophrenia and the most predominant and significant symptoms of each type.

Paranoid Schizophrenia: People suffering from paranoid schizophrenia are characterized by strong auditory hallucinations and of being persecuted. However, they are very normal and function normally. But they are not ready to discuss their feelings openly and the symptoms are not observable. Other symptoms include anger, hostility and disorganized speech.
Disorganized Schizophrenia: As the name suggests, people with disorganized schizophrenia exhibit disorganized thoughts. Delusions and hallucination may not be seen in this type of schizophrenia. The behavior of the affected person is quite disorganized or it is difficult to understand what they are saying. In fact, some emotions exhibited by the affected person are hard to understand or they are not at all relevant to the current situation. Their daily routine and activities will also be affected.
Catatonic Schizophrenia: People with catatonic schizophrenia are characterized by increased or decreased movement. This symptom actually varies from person to person. Some people stay at a place for a long time without any kind of movement and some people keep moving for hours and do not stop. They do not speak for hours and sometimes they keep repeating the same thing over and over again. This has to be treated immediately as they will not be able to manage even their daily routine with this kind of behavior.
Undifferentiated Schizophrenia: Undifferentiated schizophrenia is a condition where the symptoms do not fall into any of the above three types. You will also be able to observe hallucinations, delusions, anger, disorganized speech or catatonic behavior.
Residual Schizophrenia: As the name suggests, it is the residue of schizophrenia behavior, but it is less severe as compared to the past. Delusions, hallucination and disorganized speech may still be present but compared to the past, the patient would be doing better. 

Schizophrenia - 5 Types & Their Signs!

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