A couple of decades ago, medical professionals believed that a lot of females could not climax at all. There are a number of reasons for this. It is easy for the male to know when he has achieved an orgasm, which usually happens with ejaculation, which is quite evident. For the females, on the other hand, it is not so evident. It is a perceived feeling and while the media showcase it in a particular way, reality is far moved from it.
There are various reasons why it is very difficult to pin this down. Orgasms are not just an elusive feeling for the woman, it is an elusive topic for the medical professionals too. Read on to know some of the common causes (more beliefs or notions) about this and some simple but effective ways of managing this.
- Private topic: Girls are very shy compared to boys and both their exposure to sex education and discussion about this is limited compared to boys. We might tend to think of it as common in India alone, but this is true across a vast number of countries. We are not alone! This shyness continues into their later years too, and unless transformed by the partner, it may continue to be a topic that is shunned.
- Purpose: Sex is more deemed as a form of procreation rather than for sex. Therefore, while sex is necessary for conception, orgasm is not. This is one more reason (strange but true) that orgasm is very elusive for a woman.
- Psychological factors: It could be guilt from past relationships or fear of past abuse. It could be fear of losing control or fear of coming across as vulnerable. For any of these reasons, women can have difficulties climaxing during the act.
In men, the causes are more defined and physical in nature and include erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, retrograde ejaculation, and delayed ejaculation.
Whatever the cause of the problem, the first step in coping up with the issue is to acknowledge the issue. Being a private topic, this is not something that is going to draw the person towards medical help. However, this needs to be discussed frankly with the partner or with the doctor. Getting the partner involved removes a lot of psychological barriers (guilt, fear, anxiety, etc.) This would result in natural ironing out of issues, improving the performance of both the people involved.
If that does not happen, seeking professional help, be it medical help to correct physical issues or counselling, is the next suggestion. A frank discussion will do wonders, and what was once elusive can be well within your reach.

The Elusive Orgasm - Causes and Coping!

Most of us are affected by diseases, which spread through physical contact, but most of us do not consider it important to get them checked, due to which they turn into major ailments. Sexually transmitted diseases (stds) are infections, which are transmitted through any kind of sexual contact. The organism that causes the disease is transmitted from one person to the other during sex intercourse. Sometimes stds can be asymptomatic (no symptoms or signs)

Here are some stds that you should be informed about:

1. Gonorrhoea: genital infection caused by bacteria is called gonorrhoea, its symptoms include 

 Bloody vaginal discharge
 Painful urination
 Heavy period bleeding
 Anal itching

2. Chlamydia: bacterial infection in the genital tract is called chlamydia. Chlamydia is usually difficult to diagnose, its symptoms include

 Pain during urination
 Pain in lower abdomen
 Vaginal discharge
 Painful intercourse
 Bleeding between menstrual cycles

3. Syphilis: the bacterium treponema pallidum causes syphilis, its symptoms include

 Rashes
 Sores in the mouth, anus or vagina
 In later stages, it causes nerve and organ damage

4. Genital herpes: the herpes simplex virus (hsv) causes herpes. Signs and symptoms include-

 Small red bumps or ulcers in the anal, genital and other areas
 Itching or pain around the genital area, thighs and buttocks

5. Human papillomavirus (hpv) and genital warts: genital warts are caused by hpv. It infects the genital tract. Hpv has been linked to cervical cancer, its symptoms include

 Small swellings in the genital area
 Itching
 Bleeding during sex

6. Chancroid: chancroid is a bacterial infection. The bacterium haemophilus ducreyi causes chancroid, its symptoms include

 Development of red bumps on the skin folds covering the genitals
 Pain during urination
 Burning sensation during bowel movement

7. Ectoparasitic infections: ectoparasitic infections are caused by small parasitic bugs like mites or lice. The parasites usually affect the hair or skin. Scabies and crabs are common parasites that cause such infections. They both cause intense itching and visible rashes.

8. Human immunodeficiency virus (hiv) and acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (aids): the virus that causes aids is called hiv. It can spread through blood, vaginal fluids, semen and breast milk. Unprotected sex or sharing needles with an infected person is how the disease spreads. It includes symptoms, such as

 Slight fever
 Fatigue
 Muscle aches
 Weight loss.

Most Common STDs in Women

Oral sex is a form of sexual activity, which involves the arousal of one's genitalia by his/her partner using the mouth (tongue, lips and throat). It is also called Cunnilingus (performed on a female) and fellatio (performed on a male). It is done before intercourse and during foreplay for sexual arousal. It is safe as compared to vaginal or anal sex, the rate of getting a sexually transmitted disease or HIV is comparatively lower. 

Oral sex can spice up your life and can also make your partner reach orgasm. It is also a safe way of getting sexual pleasure without getting pregnant. But necessary precautions must be taken in order to have safe oral sex.

Some of these necessary precautions are:

1. You can get throat cancer from oral sex: Human papillomavirus (HPV) is a cancerous virus found in the body of infected people. This virus can be transmitted to the person with whom you are engaging in oral sex. Studies show that people who engage with more than 6 sexual partners at once are more prone to get oral cancer. It is advisable to get your partner tested for HPV virus before engaging in oral sex.

2. Oral sex also causes stress: Oral sex is generally related to hygiene, therefore the partner can be self conscious and worried about his/her genital hygiene. If oral sex is performed on a daily basis, some people prefer to wax their pubic hair often. This is harmful because it can cause red bumps and burning sensation occurs. It is advisable to trim your pubic hair and wash it properly before engaging in oral sex.

3. A condom should be worn by the male during oral sex so that there is no risk of male fluid entering the woman's body.

4. A latex, which is made into a thin sheet called dental dam can be used on the vagina or anus. This creates a thin barrier between the mouth and the genitalia. Hence, chances of getting infected by sexually transmitted diseases are greatly reduced.

Oral sex can be pleasurable and fun, but the risks of getting sexually transmitted diseases like herpes, gonorrhea and crabs is not altogether misplaced. So it is advisable to use proper protection and to maintain hygiene before engaging in oral sex.

4 Ways to Have Safe Oral Sex - Necessary Precautions

One of the most common physically transmitted diseases is chlamydia. Chlamydia is a type of infection caused by the bacteria "Chlamydia trachomatis". The symptoms of Chlamydia are similar to the symptoms of Gonorrhoea (a bacterial sexually transmitted infection). Chlamydia infection causes permanent fallopian tube damage in women, leads to future ectopic pregnancy (the fertilised egg attaches itself outside the uterus) and infertility.

Symptoms of Chlamydia 
Men and women afflicted with chlamydia exhibit different symptoms.
The symptoms of chlamydia in women include:
1. Abnormal, sometimes foul-smelling, vaginal discharge
2. Bleeding between menstrual cycles
3. Painful periods
4. Abdominal pain, accompanied with fever
5. Pain during intercourse
6. Burning or itching around or in the vagina
7. Painful urination

Men usually display the following symptoms if they have chlamydia:
1. Minimal amounts of cloudy or clear discharge from the head of the penis
2. Painful urination
3. Itching and burning around the slit of the penis
4. Swollen and painful testicles

Treatment options available
1. Chlamydia is diagnosed by taking a swab from the cervix (in women) or the urethra (in men). These swabs will be sent to the laboratory for analysis. Urine samples can also be taken to check for the appearance of bacteria.

2. Since chlamydia is a bacterial infection, it can be easily treated with antibiotics. Oral antibiotics such as azithromycin or doxycycline are commonly prescribed by doctors. Azithromycin is usually prescribed in a large, single dose. The dose may also be stretched out for five days. Doxycycline is taken two times daily for a week.

3. With the right antibiotic therapy, the infection will clear up in 1 to 2 weeks approximately. It is very important that you finish the medication course if you wish you heal completely without having to suffer from further bouts of this disorder.

4. Women with critical chlamydia may need hospitalisation, pain medicine and IV (intravenous, or directly through the vein) antibiotics. Pregnant women with chlamydia infection can be safely cured with antibiotic such as erythromycin ethylsuccinate, amoxicillin and azithromycin.

Your partner needs testing and treatment as well to avoid further spread and reinfection. It is vital not to engage in any sexual activity while the treatment is ongoing. A further retest should be done three months later to make sure the infection is rectified.

Symptoms of Chlamydia and Ways to Treat the Disease

Don't Panic !

Having unprotected sex isn't the smartest move a person can make, but it isn't necessarily the end of the world, so follow the advice below and you should be fine.

We Had Unprotected Sex And...I Think I'm Pregnant

Finding out you're pregnant can be the happiest or the scariest day of your life.

Don't wait around and bury your head in the sand saying 'it won't happen to me' and 'I'll be fine' you might not be, and then you'll find yourself in a much more difficult situation than if you'd faced the situation head on and quickly.

If the intercourse happened less than 72 hours ago, emergency contraception, the morning-after pill, can be taken as a precaution against you becoming pregnant. However, note that the sooner you take the emergency contraceptive pill, the higher its efficiency is.

We Had Unprotected Sex And...I Think I Have an STI

Check for any unusual symptoms around your genitals (vagina or penis), such as:

Pain when you urinate
Itching
An unusual or smelly discharge
Sores
Unexplained bleeding
If any consult your healthcare provider immediately

Not all STIs have visible symptoms so even if you think you're fine, after having unprotected sex, get tested!

Go For Sexually Transmitted Disease Profile Including HIV ( 1ST Month HIV RNA, 3RD MONTH HIV ELISA), HSV 1 and 2, HbsAg, HCV, Urine Routine, VDRL, etc.

We Had Unprotected Sex And...I Think I May Get HIV

Take Post Exposure Prophylactic Drugs (Anti - HIV) as soon as possible. It works when started within 72 hours and must be continued for 1 month to prevent HIV.



What If You Have Unprotected Sex?

Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) are infections that you can get from having sex with someone who already has the infection. The causes of STDs are bacteria, parasites, and viruses. These infections often do not cause any symptoms, and can still be passed unknowingly from the infected partner to the other. However, some common symptoms include genital itching, lesions, flu / fever like symptoms and feeling pain / pressure in the lower part of the stomach.

There are many kinds of STDs including Chlamydia, gonorrhea, genital herpes, syphilis and HIV.

The important thing to understand and know is that these STDs can be prevented.

3 ways of preventing STDS are:

1. Precautions before having sex

There are some things you can do to reduce your risk of contracting STDs before having sex. This include:

  Limiting the number of sexual partners
  Talking honestly with partners about your sexual history
  Getting tested, along with your partner, before having sex
  Getting timely vaccination against HPV and HBV

If you have been diagnosed with an STD you should tell your partner about it and also explicitly ask your partner if they have had an STD.

2. Practice safe sex

Use a latex condom every time you have sex and use a water-based lubricant. If your sex life involves intercourse, anal or vaginal, make up your mind to never have sex without a condom. If you or your partner is at a high risk of STDs, be consistent about barrier use during oral sex as well. Avoid sharing towels or underclothing to reduce the risk of an STD. Check the expiration date of the condom and make sure that it has an air bubble, which shows it has not been punctured. Dispose the condom properly and never reuse it.

3. Don't drink Alcohol or use drugs before having sex

It's impossible to make responsible choices about your sex life under the influence of drugs or alcohol. When you are under the influence of any one of them, you are not in your mind and are likelier to choose a partner you wouldn't have picked otherwise. In that case, you may be at a higher risk of contracting an STD. Also, if you are on birth control pills and you vomit, the pills could lose some effectiveness.



3 Ways You Can Prevent STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases)

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