Becoming a parent is one of the greatest joys in life. It is a magical feeling to hold your child in your arms for the first time. However, as your child grows up, you will notice certain behavioural changes that can be difficult to control or withstand. Temper tantrums are common in children. A child uses tantrums to vent frustration and anger, which he/she feels toward a person or a situation.

While such temper tantrums may lead you to lose your temper, remember that children do not have the same emotional maturity as that of an adult. Therefore, rather than being strict to your child, here are some ways to deal with temper tantrums.

1. Don t try to calm your child: Temper tantrums are often attention seeking in nature. Therefore, you will make it worse if you try too hard to calm your child while he/she is throwing such a tantrum. Instead, choose to ignore the behaviour and go about doing your job. However, keep an eye out to check that your child does not do anything to harm himself/herself or others during this time. You should also verbally clarify that such behaviour is not acceptable.

2. Speak softly but with resolve: Many parents seem to think that shouting at their kids helps against temper tantrums. It does not. In fact, the more your child shouts, the more softly you should interact with them. When you shout you give your child the opportunity to shout - they do this so that they can be heard. Instead, be stern. Sometimes offering a choice can help your child feel as if he/she is in control of the situation.

3. Empathize with your child: Seeing the world from your toddler s perspective is no easy task. This is why parents often think that a temper tantrum is meaningless. However, in most cases, a child s temper tantrum is rooted in the inability to perform a task or articulate his/her wishes. As a parent, you need to devise alternate forms of communication with your child, so that he/she can express feelings better.

4. Give them some space: Rather than scolding your child for throwing a tantrum, let him/her express their frustration. This is similar to the concept of adults venting undesirable feelings. However, tell your kids to express frustration in a non-destructive way. This approach helps your child become emotionally stronger, as they learn to deal with sadness and anger in their own way, without requiring support from elders.

You need to understand that all children throw temper tantrums at one time or another. How you handle the situation determines how your child will deal with frustration and sorrow in later parts of their life.

Parenting Tips To Tackle Temper Tantrums In Children!

Smoking   Some Naked Facts!

Smoking kills > 420,000 people per year worldwide.
In India one million people die of smoking related diseases each year.
Tobacco use is the second leading cause of death world-over.
Smoking is more lethal than AIDS, Accidents, Homicides, Suicides, Fire, etc.
2700 substances have been identified in Cigarette smoke, most of them harmful including cyanide, benzene, formaldehyde, methanol, acetylene, ammonia, nitrogen oxide, carbon monoxide, etc.
Every cigarette takes 5.5 minutes of your life.
Smoking one packet a day for 10 years increases risk for Ischemic Heart Diseases by 300 % & risk for lung cancer by 500 %.
Passive smoking (breathing second hand smoke) is also harmful. Spending 2 hours in a smoky bar is equivalent to smoking 4 cigarettes. Living with a pack-a-day smoker is like smoking 3 cigarettes by yourself.

What are the Risks? 

Cancer: 85% of Lung Cancers and 28% of all cancer deaths are attributed to smoking. Smokers have higher rates of leukemia, kidney, stomach, bladder, and pancreas cancers. About 30% of cervical cancers have been attributed to both active and passive smoking.

Lungs: Smokers are generally at higher risk for nearly all major lung diseases like pneumonia, flu, COPD, bronchitis, emphysema, asthma, etc.

Brain: Smokers run almost two and a half times the risk of stroke as non-smokers and the risk for dementia is also higher in smokers.

Male Sexuality and Reproduction: Smoking decreases the amount of blood flowing into the penis, reduces sperm density, reduces sperm motility, and may lead to impotence & infertility

Female infertility, Pregnancy: Smoking increases the risk of female infertility, ectopic pregnancy, miscarriages, stillbirth, prematurity and low-birth weight, so also there is a risk of passing genetic mutations that increase cancer risks to unborn babies.

Children: Mothers exposed to smoke (active or passive) are more likely to have children with motor control problems, perception impairments, and attention disabilities. Exposure to smoke early on affect the lungs of infant as early as the first 2 to 10 weeks of life, it increases the risk for lower respiratory infections (asthma, bronchitis, and pneumonia) by 50% and worsens the condition of children who have existing asthma.
 
Spine & Bones: Smokers whose jobs involve lifting heavy objects are more likely to develop low back pain than non-smokers. They are at increased risk for developing osteoporosis and rheumatoid arthritis. Smokers are more prone to develop degenerative disorders and injuries in the spine, they have more trouble recovering from spinal surgery as smoking also impairs formation of new bone.

Why Quit?


Physical Benefits: They start as early as in few minutes.

Blood pressure and Pulse rate return to Normal in 20 minutes.
Levels of carbon monoxide and oxygen in the blood return to normal in 8 hours and chance of heart attack decreases in 24 hours.
Nerve endings start to regrow; ability to taste and smell increases within 48 hours.
Bronchial tubes relax; lung capacity increases by 72 hours.
In 2 to 12 weeks  time circulation improves and lung functions improve up to 30%.
In 1 to 9 months  time there is a decreased incidence of coughing, sinus infection, fatigue, and shortness of breath; cilia in lungs start re-growing, increasing the ability to handle mucus, clean the lungs, and reduce chance of infection.
Overall energy level increases.

Smoking - Facts, Risks & Why To Quit!

Causes and symptoms of Catatonic depression

Catatonic depression is a kind of depression which is characterized by prolonged periods of speechlessness and motionlessness. It is described as a state of mind that is caused by neurogenic and motor inabilities caused due to dysfunction of various neurotransmitters like glutamate and dopamine. People who suffer from a severe case of this condition, even have difficulty in performing simple regular tasks. For example, the act of eating breakfast may take a span of hours.

Some of the common symptoms of this condition are:

- Feelings of sadness
- A change in appetite causing gain or loss of weight
- Difficulty in concentrating and thinking
- Feelings of restlessness, worthlessness, and guilt
- Fatigue
- Irritability
- A loss of interest in any activity
- Trouble sleeping
- Attempts at suicide
- Cynicism and negativism
- Agitation
- Unusual and abnormal movements
- An inability to move and difficulty in speaking
- A refusal to eat or drink due to extreme anxiety

The major causes of catatonic depression are:

1. Abnormal neurotransmitter production

Irregularities in the production of neurotransmitters are believed to be one of the major causative factors of this type of depression. These neurotransmitters present in the brain help cells to communicate with each other. Serotonin and norepinephrine are the neurotransmitters which are mostly associated with this type of depression.

2. Dopamine irregularities

Another reason for this condition is believed to be the irregularities in dopamine, glutamate, and gamma-aminobutyric acid neurotransmitter systems. Underlying neurological, physical, psychiatric or psychological conditions are accompanying issues.

Administering antidepressants or using electroconvulsive therapy are some of the known ways of treatment which have proved effective for getting relief from catatonic depression.



What Makes Catatonic Depression so Impairing?

Alcohol Withdrawal Syndrome is the name given to the symptoms seen in you if you consume heavy doses of alcohol frequently and then suddenly quit or reduce your alcohol intake considerably. These symptoms may surface anytime between six hours to a few days after you last drank.

Common symptoms of alcohol withdrawal syndrome:

Hallucinations
Fever
Nausea
Tremors
Anxiety
Vomiting
Immense sweating
Insomnia
High blood pressure
Sweating

All these symptoms may worsen over a few days and may even last till a few weeks.

What is the root cause?

Alcohol arouses your nervous system. In case you are a heavy drinker, your body gradually gets dependent on alcohol, and cannot adapt too easily to the lack of alcohol after you have abruptly quit. This is the root cause of Alcohol Withdrawal Syndrome (AWS).

Who is at risk?

You are at the maximum risk of AWS if you are an alcohol addict, or you cannot gradually cut down on its intake.

How do doctors diagnose AWS?

Usually, doctors will search for a few symptoms in you, like irregular heart rate, dehydration, fever, and tremors or minor fits. A toxicology screen also helps your doctor finding out the levels of alcohol in your body.

How is AWS treated?

Treatment depends on the severity of the symptoms. Usually are:

1. Home Care-

Mild symptoms of AWS can be treated at your home. You need to go for your regular routine checkups and tests. You may also have to go to rehabilitation programs for recovering alcoholics.

2. Hospitalization-

If your symptoms are more severe, you may have to be treated in a hospital, where you will be monitored and kept on a fluid diet to help prevent dehydration.

3. Medications

You can also be treated with sedatives.

Do you recover fully?

Usually, chances are that you will fully recover from AWS. If you quit drinking, take your medicines on time, and lead a healthy life thereafter. However, sleep disturbances and fatigue may persist. But, if you have severe symptoms of AWS, you should seek medical care as soon as possible to prevent any further fatal complications.

All you need to know about Alcohol Withdrawal Syndrome (AWS)


A new relationship involves a lot of weighing from both the sides. Learn what really matters to win people over in this post. When you want to build a new relationship, whether it is for work, business, personal, marriage, friendship etc there are several factors that help take off and bloom the relationship. These factors are broadly the same in different age groups as far as psychological impact matters. Some of the most important influential factors from a psychological point of view have been highlighted here. 

1. Presentation- When you want to draw someone into relationship with you for any reason, it is important that you present yourself at you best levels be it physical or mental. Like they say that the first impression is the best impression, your display of you strengths creates an impression that helps people decide what they want to do with you. This doesn't mean you should hide all your weaknesses but highlighting your strengths is as important as making your weaknesses clear. Always learn to put your best foot forward as sometimes that itself may not be enough. You can't really send your neighbour for your job interview!! There are many instances when people send different photographs in their applications and different ones appear for the exams. This is mere cheating and not winning.

2. Plan – Let people know what you want to do with them and what they can they can do with you. No one can say they don’t have a plan. There is always some plan. Knowing it strengthens why you want to have that relationship in the first place. Otherwise it's like something which is there but you can never want to do anything with! When you are honest with your plans and they workout as you described it, it creates confidence in relationship or else it is destroyed forever. You can cheat a person with your plans once, not forever.

3. Possibilities- Will this relationship bring me trouble? Obviously nobody wants to get into a relationship with anybody that brings them trouble be it physical or mental. Next question is whether it will benefit me? Small or big depends on person's needs. Some relationships neither bring us trouble nor benefits us, such relationships are better than the ones which can cause harm.

4. Potential – Question. Does this relationship you are trying to develop have any possibilities of growth a few or many years down the line. Obviously we have a lot of friends who wither by passing of time. Does this relationship have an expiry date irrespective of how well or bad it goes? Like when we join college we know for sure that the friends will be with us till the duration of the course and that's it. We will know that if we study together it will help us achieve great grades in college and hence a great life later. These kind of growth possibilities or possibilities of deterioration are important to be well aware of and will naturally decide the course of relationships.

5. Progress – No matter what our initial assessments are, how the relationships helps us fare in the outside world will ultimately decide the future of any relationship. Loss, sorrow, tragedy, degradation in any aspect of life, insults, injury, loss of health etc will never help any relationship continue or last.

6. Partnerships – When we want to build a relationship with someone, the best way to do it is to obviously partner with that person in as many activities as possible. The more interested a person is the more activities that person will involve you in and try to do it with you. This type of partnership activities, be it spending a few hours in the evening, or a few minutes on phone, or an association of months or years are a foolproof way to show you are interested. Conversely a person who doesn't partner with you in anything is extremely unlikely to ever have any sort of relationship with you. Partnership in activities is the only way to show and know that you are interested or the other person is interested respectively. After all chasing the moon, stars and rainbow are activities of people who don’t realize its out of their reach. Sensible people are busy with what their eyes see, hands feel, ears listen, tongue tastes and thinking perceives as appropriate.

7. Positioning attitudes- As a tree bends with the winds to prevent from cracking, we all have to be flexible with our attitudes towards each other. Being too rigid about our protocol on how relationships should run irrespective of the reality and circumstances of the person we are having a relationship with is naturally going to break relationships. After all a doctor who heals and prevents all illnesses is better than a doctor who abuses his patients for falling ill but never does anything for them. Eg: You get bed and good food in a hotel as well as at your home. A hotel will provide food only on payment of money, but family will provide it whenever your hungry. Hence hotels can never expect the same emotions as family can, and this is as natural as it should be. Hence be careful what you want from a relationship. Whether you want to be treated as a hotel or family is entirely how you play yourself with others. After all only families can expect loyalty not hotels.

8. Politeness- In any relationship, many years down the line, what our long term memory retains is how comfortable we were in that relationship. Even if we profit from a particular relationship, the fact that it shook us mentally and emotionally will never allow us to go back or retain that relationship. Life is short and the only thing that matters is to spend it comfortably. Not destroy our peace for some benefit that destroys our peace of mind.

9. Personation- While sending a representative of your organization for a client meeting may work in business, you cant really send a representative to meet you wife or kids at home. In personal relationship, lack of your physical presence obviously means that you don’t have time for them. In any relationship, individuality matters a lot. Just imagine, if all actors acted exactly the same in movies, why would you prefer any particular one over the other as your favourite? The nuances and differences in our personalities are what makes us all unique. We are not robots from a particular brand to behave exactly the same way. If a person in a relationship doesn't sense your individuality you are wasting their time by trying to have a relationship with them, especially a personal one.

10. Positive reinforcement- When we get into a relationship, it is important that we feel good about ourselves and what we are doing. If you feel like a shoplifter entering a shop, you will not feel good about that relationship. When a shopkeeper welcomes us, shows us his products, tells us their details and provides all the explanations on how we will be well off with the product, provides his guarantee for it, confirms its essence, many people buy it even if they don’t compulsively need it. It’s the same in relationships. On the same side if a shopkeeper is arrogant, avoidant, abusive, insulting etc you are very unlikely to buy anything in that shop because you are not sure that the shopkeeper means any good and will be happy with the shopkeeper s product. The experience of buying is as important as the product we buy. Nobody is happy about something they got when they weren't treated the right way or is interested in retaining it when they don’t get good service for it.

11. Persistence on all Ps – Obviously when we want relationships to last, we need to be persistent on all the above P's. Otherwise it wont take long for a relationship to be counted in “once upon a time”!! A simple conversation even if for a few minutes every now and then when you need it may make it seem that you are still there for a person. Without even that people may even find it hard to remember that they even had something to do with you sometime before keeping in mind the the numerous activities we involve daily to maintain our lifestyles.

“KNOWING IS DOING AND NOT KNOWING IS UNDOING EVEN IF DOING!”

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'Consult'.

From Lybrate: If you found this tip useful, please thank the doctor by clicking on the heart icon below. Also, spread good health by sharing this tip with your loved ones over WhatsApp, Facebook and other media.


How To Win Over New Relationships

One of the most common personality disorders, BPD or borderline personality disorder often remains undiagnosed or repressed and gets passed off as mood swings or a volatile disposition. However this disorder is much more than just mood swings as it can seriously affect the quality of a person s life. The primary manifestation of this disorder is in the way you think about yourself and others which result in the work that you need to do on a daily basis.

How does BPD manifest in your life?
The most common ways Borderline personality disorder can manifest in your life is with extreme mood swings or emotions, a discernable pattern in relationships becoming unstable after sometime, impulsive behavior, and a self image which is distorted. BPD thus affects how you view yourself, how you feel about others and you resultant behavior in general. Some of the typical signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder are mentioned below.

Persistent feelings of emptiness

Anger in inappropriate or unnecessary places, losing your temper very frequently, resulting in physical fights
Fearing abandonment intensely, whether it is real or imagined and thus going huge lengths to stop it from happening
Extreme instability in relationships which may cause a partner to be liked one moment and then hated the next
People with BPD also tend to be suicidal which is often caused by the fear of rejection or separation
Engaging in risky and impulsive behaviors such as
Engaging in unsafe sex despite being aware of the implications
Splurging money on gambling
Leaving a good job suddenly
A tendency to indulge in drugs
Binge eating
Reckless driving
Suddenly terminating a healthy and positive relationship
Sudden changes in values and self-identity and goals and feeling low about yourself as a result
Causes of Borderline personality disorder
In most cases borderline personality disorder can t be exactly attributed to a single cause and in most cases, is a combination of factors. While genetic or hereditary predisposition can cause BPD it may also be triggered by other factors. Also, not curbing mal-traits in young children or encouraging such behaviors may lead to BPD as they grow up. Some of the factors that contribute to BPD are

Genetics
Abnormalities in the brain
Childhood incidents which were stressful
Personality traits which have worsened
If you think you have been displaying some of the symptoms for a fairly prolonged period, it is advisable that you visit a mental health professional for counseling and start with therapy as advised by them.

Borderline Personality Disorder - How It Manifests In Your Life?

Don't wait any longer, manage your Health Psychologist online with a Lybrate doctor today

Consult for Health Psychologist - Online and Easy!

FilterClear All

COMMON SPECIALITIES

COMMON ISSUES