MISUNDERSTANDINGS AND ARGUMENTS? CHANGE THEM INTO FLOWING CONVERSATION
Conflicts and misunderstandings occur at all levels of interaction – at work, among friends, within families and between relationship partners. When conflict occurs, the relationship may be weakened or strengthened. Thus, conflict is a critical event in the course of a relationship. Arguments  and misunderstandings  can cause resentment, hostility and perhaps the ending of the relationship. If it is handled well, however, it can be productive – leading to deeper understanding, mutual respect and closeness. The health of any relationship is gauged by how the conflicts are resolved, rather than the number of conflicts between the participants. 
Conflicts run all the way from minor, unimportant differences to disputes which can threaten the existence of a relationship. Conflicts with a loved one or a long-term friend are, of course, different from negotiating with someone who does not care about your needs, like a stranger or a salesperson. 

 Principles that underscores all successful conflict resolution. 
1. Both parties must view their conflict as a problem to be solved together so that both parties have the feeling of winning.
2. Each person must participate actively in the resolution and make an effort and commitment to find answers which are as fair as possible to both. 

We may get so caught up with our own immediate interests that we damage our relationships. If we disregard the position of the other person, if fear and power are used to win, or if we always have to get our own way, the other person will feel hurt and the relationship may be wounded. Similarly, if we always surrender just to avoid conflict, we give the message to the other person that it is acceptable to be bullied and our needs don’t matter. Our feeling of self-worth suffers, resentment surfaces, and we feel frustrated in the relationship. Instead, it is healthier if both parties can remain open, honest, assertive and respectful of the other position. Mutual trust and respect, as well as a positive, constructive attitude, are fundamental necessities in relationships that matter.

SOME EFFECTIVE STRATEGIES TO HOLD EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATIONS:
1. INITIAL AGREEMENT: The other person may be very angry with you and may be having loads of evidence to prove himself right. At that time, instead of arguing your position, simply agree at that time because there will be a grain of truth if nothing else. This doesn’t mean that you are giving up your values and principles. Sometimes its important to diffuse the emotional charge before working out on the differences. Sometimes its ok to “lose” individually in order to “win” together in the end.
2. EMPATHY: Sometimes putting yourself  in the other persons shoes and seeing the problem from their perspective helps build bridges. You could say,” I feel that you must be very upset with me for behaving like that with you, I should have been more considerate”. Half the battle is won and the other participant feels validated and will be more willing to listen to your tale of woes more amicably.
3. ASK QUESTIONS: When you ask questions, it shows that you care and are interested to resolve the problem at hand. Please note that while asking questions, be watchful of your words and tone. Asking exploratory  questions about the other persons thoughts and feelings rather than probing and insulting questions can take you miles on the way to effective resolution. For eg. “Is there anything that you would like me to know about this problem”?
4. USING “I” STATEMENTS: Take responsibility for your own thoughts and feelings rather than blaming the other person for making you feel like that. This decreases the chance that the other person will become defensive. For example, “I feel pretty upset that this thing has come between us.” This statement is much more effective than saying, “You have made me feel very upset.” 
5. COMPLIMENTS: Find something nice and genuine to say about the other person, even if the other is angry with you. Show a respectful attitude. For example, “I genuinely respect you for having the courage to bring this problem to me. I admire your strength and your caring attitude.” 

A RATIONAL APPROACH TO RESOLVING CONFLICTS:
Here is a model that may help in resolving interpersonal conflicts. 
1. Identify the Problem. Have a discussion to understand both sides of the problem. The goal at this initial stage is to say what you want and to listen to what the other person wants. Define the things that you both agree on, as well as the ideas that have caused the disagreement. It is important to listen actively to what the other is saying, use “I” statements and avoid blame. 
2. Come Up With Several Possible Solutions. This is the brainstorming phase. Drawing on the points that you both agree on and your shared goals, generate a list of as many ideas as you can for solving the problem, regardless of how feasible they might be. Aim toward quantity of ideas rather than quality during this phase, and let creativity be your guide.
3. Evaluate These Alternative Solutions. Now go through the list of alternative solutions to the problem, one by one. Consider the pros and cons of the remaining solutions until the list is narrowed down to one or two of the best ways of handling the problem. It is important for each person to be honest in this phase. The solutions might not be ideal for either person and may involve compromise. 
4. Decide on the Best Solution. Select the solution that seems mutually acceptable, even if it is not perfect for either party. As long as it seems fair and there is a mutual commitment to work with the decision, the conflict has a chance for resolution. 
5. Implement the Solution. It is important to agree on the details of what each party must do, who is responsible for implementing various parts of the agreement, and what to do in case the agreement starts to break down. 
6. Continue to Evaluate the Solution. Conflict resolutions should be seen as works in progress. Make it a point to ask the other person from time to time how things are going. Something unexpected might have come up or some aspect of the problem may have been overlooked. Your decisions should be seen as open to revision, as long as the revisions are agreed upon mutually. 

Keep in mind that differences will come up in any relationship just because you two are different individuals with different perspectives, ideologies, attitudes and perceptions. Too much similarity in personality and working styles may be comforting but can be very boring and uninspiring overtime. On the other hand, differences can bring change, novelty and an added spice to the relationship. Two very different people can pool their different strengths and work together as a stronger team. Though, extreme differences may overtime sour the relationship and make living or working together difficult. You also need to look out for an emotionally or physically abusive relationship, which is based on power differential rather than respect and trust. A person may then choose to opt out after an amicable “goodbye” or "agree to disagree".























When man first started using tobacco, he probably did not know that it would grow to be an epidemic that could cause multiple health issues. Be it smoking or chewing, tobacco has severe negative effects on health. Take any of the current lifestyle diseases from diabetes to obesity, the common risk factor is tobacco abuse. In addition, depending on the form of tobacco used, specific organs are affected. For instance, chewing tobacco leads to oral cancer while smoking causes lung cancer.

The statistics around tobacco abuse are extremely startling and can be read below:

A total of about 90 trillion rupees are spent on various tobacco products.
About 1.4 trillion is spent on healthcare-related to conditions caused by tobacco abuse.
India has about 120 million tobacco users.
More than 7 million people die every year due to tobacco usage.
The Government has levied a GST of 28% on cigarettes, making them unaffordable, which is one of the ways to promote quitting.
For those who want to quit but are not able to, there is a quit-line setup, which is toll-free, 1800-11-2356 and is accessible from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m.
Tobacco is a menace in all the strata of society. The lower economic classes are adversely affected both due to lack of knowledge and healthcare facilities. Therefore, the government uses the World No Tobacco Day (WNTD) that is observed by all members of the World Health Organization as an opportunity to drive this awareness.

This is celebrated on May 31st every year. Some measures that are taken to promote 'say no to tobacco' campaign are listed below.

In 1975, the Cigarettes (Regulation of Production, Supply, and Distribution) Act was introduced, which made it mandatory for cigarette packs to have a warning stating  Smoking Kills  or  Smoking is injurious to health. 
Marketing campaigns are shown in the movie theatres at the beginning of movies which depict the hazards of tobacco
Smoking is banned in most public areas, and warnings are on display.
Children below 18 are not sold tobacco products. If in doubt, the seller can ask for age identification.
Schools and colleges do not have tobacco selling within 100 meters of the campus.
The price increase ensures that not everybody has easy access to cigarettes.
Celebrities promote quitting tobacco and smoking by talking about their personal stories.
How can a healthcare professional help you?

A healthcare professional plays a vital role in a smokers life, as it the healthcare professional that can increase the odds of quitting with guidance, medication, and support. 

What should a healthcare professional do?

Identify people who smoke 
Motivate them to quit or think about quitting
Refer a person who smokes for treatment and support
Support ongoing abstinence
What is the right smoking cessation strategy?

Ask: Every smoker to visit a healthcare professional
Advice: Urge the smoker to leave smoking
Assess: Assess whether the person is willing to quit in 30 days
Assist: Plan and help Rx Quit
Arrange: Arrange a follow-up through phone or SMS or in-person
What is that people who smoke need help with?

First and  the foremost challenge are the withdrawal symptoms 
Urge to smoke and borderline depression with a possibility of relapse
People who have high pre-abstinence nicotine intake
How to get over the initial withdrawal discomfort?

Behavioural support is of proven efficacy
Can be delivered in different formats
Face-to-face
Telephone
Internet
Nicotine replacement therapy and nortriptyline are of proven efficacy
Facts On Nicotine Replacement Therapy (NRT)

There are no real contradictions related to NRT
No drug interactions 
Side effects, if there are any are localized e.g.
Taste of oral products
Hiccups with the mouth spray 
Skin irritation with patch 
Treatment for quitting Nicotine  - Medications: Medicines which are useful adjuncts in the determined but unsuccessful quitters are Varenicline and Bupropion. 

Though smoking out in the open has reduced, there are miles to cover when it comes to eradication of tobacco. 

World No Tobacco Day - Making An Effort To Control Tobacco Usage!

How Smoking Impacts Your Organs

As you inhale cigarette smoke, about 7000 carcinogens stir the crevices of your body. In India, about 3,00,000 people die every year due to smoking-related issues.

Here's a list of 5 such organs, which are the most affected by cigarette smoke.

1. Your lungs - Your lungs are probably the first organs to bear the wrath of cigarette smoke. Majority of the lung cancer cases are due to smoking. Other diseases include bronchitis and emphysema. This smoke paralyzes the cilia lining the inner walls so much so that it overproduces mucous. When the mucous builds, respiration suffers. Asthma and cancer follow.

2. Your Skin - Your skin also gets affected up to a huge extent if you smoke. You could have deep circles under your eyes, wrinkles on your skin, and stretch marks, if you continue smoking over time. Also, there lies the risk of major health issues like skin warts, psoriasis, skin cancer, and wounds, which may take longer to heal.

3. Your Penis - Studies revealed that you can take longer for an erection and find it difficult to maintain it if you are a heavy smoker. Studies have also revealed that men who quit smoking had longer and firmer erections.

4. Your Liver - Smoking increases the chances of you suffering from liver cancer dramatically. According to studies, half of the liver cancer cases are due to smoking. Obesity can also take place if you're a heavy smoker.

5. Your Eyes - Smoking affects your eyes to the extent of making you blind. Partial vision loss, glaucoma, cataracts, dry eye syndrome, and diabetic retinopathy are some of the other diseases you are susceptible to if you smoke.

Despite the negative effects, quitting smoking can save you from all of these potential health hazards.

Here are some ways to help you quit smoking.

1. Nicotine Replacement Therapy - There are a few nicotine replacement tools in the form of nicotine nasal sprays and nicotine inhaler, which you can use to quit smoking.

2. Chew on something - You should try to chew on some candy, or a gum, or anything crunchy and satisfying once you start getting restless for a cigarette or any other form of nicotine. That usually helps.

3. Relaxation techniques - If you are resisting tobacco strongly, it can be very stressful indeed. Take a break from whatever you are doing and go out for a walk, practice muscle relaxation, yoga or deep breathing to keep the craving out of the way.

4. Get involved in some physical work - Getting involved in some work will surely go a long way in reducing your craving. You can also try out physical exercises like squats, running, or jogging. Otherwise, you can also indulge in some needlework, or anything, which involves concentration or physical work.



Why Smoking Impacts Your Crucial Organs the Most?

The brain is not a stagnant realm fed with a granted quota of intelligence and memory at birth. It is always in a state of flux. Exercising your brain in various ways accelerates its ability to perform better. It is in your hands to have a sharper take on situations and occurrences. Playing games that require brainstorming, solving quizzes, crosswords or playing chess makes you feel rejuvenated and tired at the same time; the reason being activated brain cells. A healthy brain will affect your life decisions positively and you probably will think rightly before you leap.

Tips to exercise those brain cells:

Meditate and calm your mind: Ten minutes of meditation each day can help you get over anxiety. When your mind is at peace you think out pros and cons with enhanced insight. This composure reflects in each of your actions. Meditation demands your brain to be quiet when it is accustomed to work; you therefore have greater control over it.
Music can improve your brain abilities: Music is the best antidote for a sloppy brain. Music excites the neurons healing a bruised memory. It gifts you with clarity of thought. Apart from listening to music one must try to play a musical instrument. Teaching yourself things puts your mind through a strict regimen of constructive activities.
Take out time to learn a new language: We are paralyzed the minute our brain gives up. Due to several external and internal reasons each one of us is likely to suffer from cognitive disorders on being subjected to extreme pressure or shock. Trying to learn a new language motivate your brain cells to have a wider vocabulary, which further restricts your chances of brain damage.  
Mental mathematics could better your intelligence: Calculators, computers and phones are ridding us of our ability to compute individual data. Computation and consolidation of data helps your mind to work faster with precision. So, you now know those lessons on mental mathematics in childhood were actually the key to a well rounded brain. 
Think of something novel: The more the number of neurons the merrier is your brain. Take pains to direct your mind on a novel track. Thinking beyond what is given and expected helps your brain grow new neurons. It builds up your creativity letting you discover more of your capabilities.

5 Tips To Help You Exercise Your Brain!

When it comes to the brain, simple yet easy to make juices can make a lot of difference. These juices not only improve your memory, but are of great help to the cognitive functions as well. While green tea is a known component of increased brain function, there are other drinks too, which can charge your brain over the long term if consumed daily:

Beet juice: Apart from being a nutritional powerhouse, beet juice is a great source of nitric acid. The latter helps with blood flow in the body. A smooth blood flow, on the other hand, helps the brain in functioning properly. A study has found that people who consume beet juice have an increased circulation in the white matter resulting from an increased brain activity. This juice is sweet in taste and can be consumed every alternate day.
Berry Smoothies: Acai is a fruit which has a South African origin and hits the top of the list when it comes to brain assisting food. It increases the flow of the blood and dilates the blood vessels. However, this is extremely expensive. Berries also have a similar effect on the brain, but they are less powerful in nature. What can be done is to mix a little ingredient of Acai in frozen berries juice and drink the same every day. Frozen berries retain the freshness and the nutritional benefits. This drink will improvise your brain and increase blood flow in the body.
Pomegranate juice: Pomegranate is a great antioxidant and it very aptly limits the free radicals from damaging the brain cells. Antioxidants are also credited with increased blood flow and protection of the heart. A healthy cardiovascular system is synonymous to an increased brain function. What is surprising is the fact that Pomegranate has more antioxidant content compared to red wine and green tea. Pomegranate juice can be consumed daily during the morning or afternoon.
Carrot juice: Carrot is known for its healthy components that are beneficial for the eyes. Recent studies have revealed that they are great for the brain too. Like other colored vegetables, they are a great source of antioxidant and have a high content of beta-carotene. Carrot juice can reduce the inflammation of the brain cells and improve memory. Carrot juice is not at all bitter and the same can be consumed every alternate day after your meal.
Cocoa: A Harvard study revealed that two cups of cocoa on a daily basis greatly helps a person in improving memory. Cocoa contains flavanols that keep the blood pressure normal and relaxes the blood vessel linings. Cocoa is also known to be a great antioxidant agent that limits the free radical to affect the brain cells. Cocoa should not be overloaded with sugar and should be consumed hot before starting your day.

5 Super Brain Drinks that Boost Your Memory


5 Ways To Remove Stress Instantly

Feeling the blues once in a while is natural for the kind of hectic lives we lead. But feeling stressed and burned out deeply affects on our body, mind and soul. When you feel stressed, you need to take measures that can help you cope up. Something as simple as saying ‘I love you’ in the mirror once in a morning turns around the way you approach your day.

Try these stress reducing tips to rejuvenate yourselves immediately.

1) Meditate- Its the best way out. It eases anxiety, which is the culprit behind those stressed out moments. All you have to do is just close your eyes, focus your attention on positive thoughts or repeatedly chanting 'Om' which has a vibrational impact. Don’t let negative thoughts distract you.
2) Inhale Deeply- There are several occasions when you might not be able to mediate. In such a case, simply start to inhale through your nose, bring it to your abdomen and let it make way through your body slowly. Deep breathing can also reduce the instances of blood pressure.
3) Laugh Out Loud- Laughing can reduce cortisol, a hormone  responsible for stress. You can watch your favourite comedy show, a sitcom or simply look for a few videos online.
4) Listen To Music- Simple but effective. Listening to music can lower your blood pressure, heart rate as well as anxiety. Go ahead and create a playlist of your favourite songs or music. And if you fancy, try to sing on the top of your lungs too!
5) Exercise- Exercising has too many incredible benefits. One of them is easing depression and anxiety. Deal with stress by exercising a few minutes every day. Ideally, 30 minutes a day is what you should aim for.



From Lybrate: If you found this tip useful, please thank the doctor by clicking on the heart icon below. Also, spread good health by sharing this tip with your loved ones over WhatsApp, Facebook and other media.


5 Ways To Remove Stress Instantly

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