Building your child s confidence and self image is an important part of raising a child. Self image can be defined as a child s view of himself and his strengths. If a child is comfortable with his self image, he will have confidence in himself. A foundation of self confidence is key to a child s success in his adult life. In their childhood years, a parent is the main source of building a child s self worth or self confidence. Here are a few ways you can develop your child s self confidence.

1. Avoid negative self talk: Children learn by watching their parents. Hearing parents berate themselves will make children do the same. Talking badly about yourself can reinforce a low self esteem. Hence avoid talking negatively about yourself and stop your child from doing it as well. If your child talks negatively about himself, give him evidence to prove the opposite or give them meaningful compliments. Also avoid calling your child names to shame him as these are likely to stay ingrained in his mind.

2. Celebrate uniqueness: Don t make your child feel like he has to live up to the standards set by siblings or peers. Further, do not pressurize them to fulfill your dreams. Recognize your child s strengths and celebrate his unique abilities. Help them develop their talents and set their own standards for themselves.

3. Let your child make decisions: Empower your child by allowing them to make decisions about simple things like what game to play or what to eat for dinner. Make them feel that their views are valued and thus teach them to be an active member of the family.

4. Let them work things out for themselves: Spoon feeding your child makes things easier at the time, but in the long run can have a negative effect on their self confidence. Be patient and let your child try and do things for himself. As he meets and overcomes new challenges, his confidence will grow. Give your child age appropriate chores to do around the house. This helps build responsibility and a feeling of competency.

5. Be genuine about your praise: Children are highly intuitive and can tell the difference between sincere praise and something being said merely for the sake of it. For example, if your child has made a drawing, instead of simply telling your child that he is an artist in the making be more specific and praise his choice or colours or ability of colouring within the lines.

Raising your Children with High Self Esteem

Causes and symptoms of Catatonic depression

Catatonic depression is a kind of depression which is characterized by prolonged periods of speechlessness and motionlessness. It is described as a state of mind that is caused by neurogenic and motor inabilities caused due to dysfunction of various neurotransmitters like glutamate and dopamine. People who suffer from a severe case of this condition, even have difficulty in performing simple regular tasks. For example, the act of eating breakfast may take a span of hours.

Some of the common symptoms of this condition are:

- Feelings of sadness
- A change in appetite causing gain or loss of weight
- Difficulty in concentrating and thinking
- Feelings of restlessness, worthlessness, and guilt
- Fatigue
- Irritability
- A loss of interest in any activity
- Trouble sleeping
- Attempts at suicide
- Cynicism and negativism
- Agitation
- Unusual and abnormal movements
- An inability to move and difficulty in speaking
- A refusal to eat or drink due to extreme anxiety

The major causes of catatonic depression are:

1. Abnormal neurotransmitter production

Irregularities in the production of neurotransmitters are believed to be one of the major causative factors of this type of depression. These neurotransmitters present in the brain help cells to communicate with each other. Serotonin and norepinephrine are the neurotransmitters which are mostly associated with this type of depression.

2. Dopamine irregularities

Another reason for this condition is believed to be the irregularities in dopamine, glutamate, and gamma-aminobutyric acid neurotransmitter systems. Underlying neurological, physical, psychiatric or psychological conditions are accompanying issues.

Administering antidepressants or using electroconvulsive therapy are some of the known ways of treatment which have proved effective for getting relief from catatonic depression.



What Makes Catatonic Depression so Impairing?

Is there anybody you know who uses internet excessively in a day, like for playing video games, visiting porn sites, for online shopping, using Facebook or visiting different chatting sites again and again? Is his or her excessive internet usage interfering with daily life, interpersonal relationships, work, school, etc.? If the answer is yes, then maybe he or she is suffering from internet addiction.

Internet addiction is a growing social issue which is being debated worldwide. Internet has become an inseparable part of our daily living. Problematic use of internet can lead us to various mental and physical problems. Surveys in the United States and Europe have indicated alarming prevalence rates between 1.5 and8.2percentages respectively.There are some criteria to classify and diagnose internet addiction disorder. 

The following 5 criteria are required to diagnose internet addiction:

The individual remain preoccupied with the internet (thinks about previous online activity or anticipate next online session)

Needs to use internet with increased amounts of time in order to achieve satisfaction.

Has made unsuccessful efforts to control, cut back, or stop internet use.

Is restless, moody, depressed, or irritable when attempting to cut down or stop internet use.

Has stayed online longer than originally intended.

Additionally, at least one of the following must be present:

Risked the loss of a significant relationship, job, educational or career opportunity because of the internet.

Lying to conceal the extent of involvement with the internet.

Use internet as a way of escaping from problems or of relieving a dysphoric mood (like; feelings of helplessness, guilt, anxiety, depression)

There are different models available to explain the causal factor of internet addiction disorder. A comprehensive model of the development and maintenance of internet addiction by Winkler & Dorsing which takes into account socio-cultural factors, biological vulnerabilities like genetic factors, abnormalities in neurochemical processes, psychological predispositions and specific attributes of the internet to explain excessive engagement in internet activities.

Apart from the above discussed points, there are two significant psychological issues commonly seen in this group; one is a strong tendency to escape from the reality is there among internet addicts. These individuals find difficulty in facing the real world may be due to certain conflict issues which evoke stress and anxiety in them. Involvement with technology and internet becomes a way out to get rid of the discomfort. Another psychological issue is the tendency to control the environment. Humans have a tendency to get a control over everything and it is a fact that we can't control other persons and situations. Internet addicts are involved in this compulsive behaviour may be because it is easy to get a control of technology and internet than the real world which is more threatening for them.

Impact of problematic usage of internet on social relationships has become alarming nowadays. The habit of surfing the internet continuously can be destructive indirectly. Even it has been seen that people drift away to the point that he/she cannot interact with people. Constant preoccupation with internet is damaging one s social skills. People are losing touch with their life and their self-identity. Nowadays people don t take effort to establish face to face conversations, as many easy ways are available over internet, like chat messengers, email, etc. The constant effects of addiction to internet can lead an individual to such situations that involve various mental and behavioural problems like. Depression, anxiety, substance abuse, etc. The absence of social interaction also can lead to various physical effects on individual s brain chemistry and the general physical health.

There has been lots of debate on which treatment modality is effective for the treatment of Internet Addiction Disorder. In many cases, multimodal treatments have been employed. It has been seen that there are lots of underlying psychological problems found in internet addicts, like anxiety, depression, etc. In such cases medications are also considered to be effective.

Apart from pharmacological interventions, different psychotherapeutic models are found to be very helpful in treating internet addiction like cognitive therapy, behaviour therapy, art therapy, family therapy, skill building training, etc. Studies have found cognitive behavioural therapy, in particular, is very effective and can bring better outcome among this group.

Internet Addiction - A Thriving Issue!

When it comes to the brain and IQ, is bigger better? Does size really matter? Is there really a connection between the size of your brain and intelligence? With the help of findings by neurologists and scientists, we seek to find out!

Ailments and the brain: Scientists have found that children with autism have a brain that has grown in a disproportionate manner in the very first year of their life. This prevents the child from making connection in a normal manner. On the other hand, children and adolescents who suffer from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder or ADHD show sign of having a much smaller brain size. Many scientists have shown that the size of the brain shrinks as we age and this does not have any visible effect on our cognitive abilities.
It s all relative: The size of the brain does not really have a bearing on the way a person s cognition gets shaped. Even large mammals like elephants and whales are finally hunted and tamed by humans who have smaller brains in comparison. The brain is made up of billions of neurons, which need to function properly. It may be seen that scientists consider the brain mass in relation with the rest of the body so as to speculate about the cognitive abilities of the person. Why is this required? Large animals need a well functioning and proportionate brain size to control and run their organs with proper cognition for satisfactory results, which is what we humans seem to have done.
Neanderthal brain: Historically, the earliest man or the Neanderthals are said to have had larger brains than we do. These people are believed to have brains that are at least 10% larger than the brains that we have in our modern times. The shape of their brain was different too. They were also heavily muscled people which had a bearing on the size and shape of the brain and bodies as well as the lean tissue within the brain. They also survived very successfully for a period of over 200,000 years, which obviously points to some form of elevated cognition, as per many scientists.
Animals: While animals with small brains like lizards and reptiles do not perform too well on IQ tests, the animals with bigger brains like elephants and dolphins perform much better. But the medium sized brain of monkeys, lemurs and other animals are said to perform in the best manner. The correlation between the body size and the brain does not seem to hold good here, as per various researches.
So the verdict as per medical science and research stands divided!

Brain Size and Intelligence - Are the Two Related?

Excess of anything is never healthy and the same applies in the case of alcohol. Alcohol experts have come to a conclusion that drinking too much alcohol reduces affects negatively in both the genders.

Alcohol Myth Busted

Since time immemorial, people have considered alcohol to be an aphrodisiac. However, this myth has been busted time and again by the side effects of excessive alcohol. On the contrary, alcohol is known to induce depression after consumption.

Alcohol, if consumed in unnatural quantity over a period of time can turn conditions like 'brewer's droop', which otherwise might be temporary into permanent impotence. Alcohol addiction is a cardinal sin for couples planning on having a baby. Women, whose bodies are much more sensitive and complex than a man's body, react greatly to even a small quantity of alcohol. Even government's guidelines on low-risk alcohol consumption unit do not guarantee no harm, and people are known to have taken much longer time to get pregnant and irregularity in their menstrual cycles even after abiding by the government's guidelines.

What Is Moderation?

No one is asking you to completely cut down on alcohol. But moderation should then be a religion for all the drinkers. Moderate drinking includes no more than 2 drinks per day (US. Centre for Disease Control and Prevention). The explanation is that your liver can act on alcohol at one standard size drink an hour, so heavy drinking means that too much alcohol for the liver to handle and hence unhealthy toxins are released in the body having an adverse effect on the sex life.

Some of the more common problems caused by alcohol in a couple's sex life are:

Long-term erectile dysfunction: The most common of all the problems, erectile dysfunction can most commonly be attributed to heavy drinking. 60% of men who are alcohol addicts are known to be suffering from loss of sexual appetite.

Ruined Families and relationships: Alcohol can be considered one of the biggest inducers of divorce among couples. It makes people less caring and more and more involved in their drinking antics. 90% of domestic violence incidents include alcohol.

Side effects of smoking: Drinking is usually accompanied by cigarettes and a cocktail of these two substances can be a deadly weapon against your sanity. For men below 40, erectile dysfunction primarily happens because of excessive smoking.

STDs: Alcohol consumption helps people shed their inhibition and cases of unprotected sex increases. It increases your chances of actually getting an STD. 50% of all impromptu sexual encounters happen in the presence of alcohol and 60% STD spread when alcohol is also in the picture. Young adults who consume alcohol at an alarming rate are 7 times more likely to indulge in unprotected sexual intercourse.

Hence, we see that alcohol addiction does not compliment healthy sex life and therefore people must toe in line at the right time to ensure the wellbeing of their lifestyle and sexual activities.

Alcohol And Its Effect On Sexual Life

Marriage or any healthy relationship, is a bonding and not a binding. Finding the right person and living happily ever after is only true in fairy tales. In reality, once you find the right partner, maintaining and nurturing the relationship bond itself takes a lifetime and living happily solely depends on how you cultivate relationship with your partner.

Communication is one of the chief ingredients besides trust, understanding, love, care, companionship and empathy in a happy and successful marriage. And, failure to communicate is one of the foremost reasons for the failure of relationships. Do you say I love you and appreciate your partner or do you just criticise and complain about him/her all day long? Do you consider his/her ideas and feelings or always turn them down? To communicate effectively is to express yourself freely to your partner, convey your likes and dislikes, convey what turns you on and what doesn't! Unless and until you are vocal about your thoughts and feelings, how do you expect your partner to understand you? You feel frustrated and upset because things don't happen your way but have you tried to 'express' your way to your partner?

Lack of communication in relationships results in frustration, misunderstandings, unrealistic expectations, guilt and can create personal differences. It is difficult for people who share their lives with each other to coexist for long without having regular and smooth communication for oiling the machinery of the relationship.

Couples who communicate effectively are not always devoid of arguments. Arguments happen because there is a difference of opinion between the partners; which is a very normal thing. Arguments usually end in nasty and bitter manner. However, it is up to us to convert that unhealthy argument into a healthy one! Most of us indulge in these arguments to win; not to resolve the matter! What is important is the 'progress' in the matter at hand, not the victory.

Remember, not to engage in any serious discussion or disclosure when angry as you tend to lose balance and rational reasoning. The same holds true in a situation where your partner is not up to it. Receptivity is of utmost importance. A 'No' from a partner does not mean not now, not ever. It simply means I don't want to do that right now! Feeling free to say no if the request is unappealing at that point in time.

Communication cues that can help improve the quality of argument:

Remember, there is no blaming game! WHAT is Right is more important than WHO is right.
Use I statements instead of You always statements. Example I feel angry vs. You always humiliate me. When you use I statements, you're taking the onus on you.
Attack the issue; not each other!
Refrain from the 4 C's : Caustic (sarcasm), Compare, Condemn and Criticize.
Avoid mind-reading your partner and assuming things; instead express yourself verbally.
Using 'I feel' statements are better over You are ones. When you say I feel, you're taking the onus for your feelings and thoughts and avoiding direct blame on your partner.
Have an open mind. Minds are like parachutes; they work best when open. Be proactive and open to changes, alternatives and work effectively for resolving a conflict.
Stay away from Stereotyping (generalizing - all men are like that...) 'Gunnysacking; (nursing past grievances and bringing them up for review while trying to resolve a present conflict).
No engaging in 'Summarizing self-syndrome' where both partners continue to restate his/her stance and issues without actually listening to other and without understanding other's perspective, feeling frustrated.
Cut back on 'Catastrophizing' i.e. dwelling on the worst possible outcomes of a problem or risk that you face, to the point that even remote, unlikely disasters preoccupy your attention. Often, objectivity becomes clouded, and you may gradually begin to feel or act as though these unlikely events are really going to happen.
Get rid of 'Stereotyping'; (generalizing - all men are like..) and 'Gunnysacking' (cropping up issues from the past having no relevance to current problem).
Don't send double messages- statements which have two conflicting meanings. Keep it as simple and assertive as possible.
A mind is like a parachute, it doesn't work unless it is open. So have a broad perspective, try to understand your partner's perspective and try and arrive at a mutually agreeable decision that caters to well-being as a whole. Matrimony is the high sea for which no compass has yet been invented. What counts in making a happy marriage is not how much compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility. Marriage was, is and never will be perfect, Yet it is the happiest wrong we are doing on earth!

Are You Happily (n)Ever After?

Don't wait any longer, manage your Health Psychologist online with a Lybrate doctor today

Consult for Health Psychologist - Online and Easy!

FilterClear All

COMMON SPECIALITIES

COMMON ISSUES