In India, crimes against women have been on the rise; they might have always happened at the same rate but today's media have become more attentive towards these crimes by bringing them to the forefront. Recently, the devastating news of an Assamese higher secondary student being raped and killed has surfaced. Her floating decomposed body was not discovered until 4th of May when the incident itself occurred on 28th of April. If a rape victim dies, it is the most unfortunate consequence that the parents and the loved ones have to live with but there are numerous victims who survive and they can lead a normal life with guidance and care. Any occurrence of sexual assault not only leaves scars on the outside but also have deeper psychological and emotional effects. The emotional scars can manifest in the form of post-traumatic disorder, depression and suicidal tendencies. If you know anyone who has undergone such an experience, then read on to find out how you can help her get back to her life.

Medical Examination: Physical effects of rape can be adverse on the victim. Forced sexual assault causes bruising, wounds and vaginal bleeding and immediate medical attention is required to ensure safety. Subsequent medical tests should also be carried out to check for Urinary Tract infection, Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and uterine fibroids.

Therapy: Wounds of the flesh heal, but it takes a lot of time to recover from emotional damage and in some cases the survivors bear the burden of psychological scars all through their lives. They may see the incident as an assault to their souls and develop depression, post-traumatic disorder, borderline personality disorder, sleeping and eating disorder. The loved ones have to be understanding and be patient with them. One-on-one therapy or group therapy sessions can be very helpful. Talking about their emotions and resolving issues of anger, regret, pain, fear, guilt in a friendly, supported and understanding environment can help them reconstruct their self-image.

Counseling: Guilt and shame are two most common stigmas that most survivors have to deal with. They somehow blame themselves for the incident and regret any step they think that might have led to the incident. They become so consumed by the incident that they think the experience defines them, instead of their persona which is called dissociative identity disorder. In such cases counseling sessions can prove to be very beneficial. They need guidance to understand the situation and separate themselves from the incident. The survivors may feel weak and victimized, overpowered and violated; they may also think that they have lost control of their bodies. Counseling can assist to resolve such issues and help them empower themselves with time.
It is important to make the survivors realize that it is not the end of their lives. With a positive attitude, proper rehabilitation and counseling rape survivors can lead a normal, happy life.

Overcoming Sexual Harassment: You Are Stronger Than You Think

Aphasia is a communication disability that can result from damage or injury to those parts of the brain that process language. It can happen due to stroke, brain tumors, accidents, or brain infection. A brain injury which damages parts of the brain that deal with language can also bring on Aphasia. Aphasia can also be caused by dementia such as Alzheimer s disease. Aphasia is sometimes also a symptom of epilepsy or other neurological disorders.

It s more common in older adults, especially after a stroke. What happens in Aphasia is that the affected person is unable to understand or use words. He or she may also:

Have difficulty speaking and finding the "right" words to express themselves verbally
Have problems understanding conversation
Have problems reading and comprehending written words
Have problems writing words
Is unable to calculate or use numbers
Has a tendency to use gibberish words as a part of speech
There are various types of Aphasia, differing in certain important ways from each other.
Aphasia can also be mild or severe. With mild Aphasia, the patient is able to converse, though he may not be able to find the right word or may not understand complex conversations.
However, in severe Aphasia, a person may lose his ability to communicate completely which means he can t speak or understand any conversation and may also not be able to read or write.

Three things that aid Aphasia recovery are

Speech Therapy
Family Support
Persistence
Treatment for Aphasia depends on factors like:

Age
Cause of brain injury which causes Aphasia
Type of Aphasia
Position and size of the brain lesion causing Aphasia
If the Aphasia is due to a brain tumor, surgery to remove the tumor affecting the language centre can treat Aphasia.
For a person who s got Aphasia due to a stroke, sessions with a speech-language specialist are very effective. The therapist teaches the patient ways to communicate using stuff that doesn t involve speech.
He uses the following to help the patient communicate without words:

Props
Drawings and pictures
Teaching patient to speak slowly and be calm when talking.
Treatment techniques
The speech therapist uses these two main techniques to tackle Aphasia:

Substitute skill model: This uses a prop like a writing board to help with spoken language.
Direct treatment model: This approach uses specific exercises to help patients
Copy and recall therapy (CART): This approach uses repetition and recall of certain words during speech therapy.
Visual communication therapy (VIC): This involves the use of index cards to represent various components of speech.
In addition, Aphasia patients are also trained in the use of hand gestures to aid in communication as a part of  Visual Action Therapy (VAT) .

Aphasia - Factors That Put You At Risk!

Back pain can take away all of your energy and stop you from doing your daily chores. Therefore, it is very important that you get the right kind of treatment. Ayurveda has proven to be a very crucial player in treating lower back pain.

The following solutions diminish the Vata dosha, which is responsible for the lower back pain:

Remain warm: One of the fundamental characteristics of Vata dosha is that it is cool. That is the reason, at whatever point you come in contact with something cold or even consume cold food items or beverages, your lower back pain somehow spikes up. During winters, this pain becomes excruciating and keeps you from doing your everyday activities. Therefore, it is very important for you to stay warm. For that, you can either put on a warm belt or get a warm balm massages on your lower back.
Lessen your intake of extremely impactful flavours: Consuming a lot of extreme flavours in your food, for example, red and green chillies and wasabi can have an extremely drying impact on the body. Since dryness is another of the primary characteristics of Vata dosha, it gets expanded with drying substances, and this can lead to constipation in your body. This increases the lower back pain.
Eat warm foods: Devouring frosty foods and beverages cause an increase in V;ata dosha,k which leads to a lot of pain. Coldness makes your lower back tightened and causes certain body parts and areas to clog. Whereas, the fitting amount of warmth gives relieve and allows smooth bowel movement in the body and helps them remain open with the goal that we can finally dispose of the processed food. This also helps relieve the pain that comes from constipation.
Practice padahastasana: Padahastasana (leaning forward-overlay stance) is an incredible Yoga posture for lower back pain specifically on the grounds that it permits the Vata dosha to stream all through the body, wiping out the blockage of the stool-conveying channels that causes both constipation and lower back pain.
Oil your body: Ayurveda shows how stress, tension, exhaustion, and tiredness are all expansions of the Vata dosha, and a lot of collected development of Vata dosha leads to early maturing, a lot of pain in different parts of the body, particularly the lower back. Therefore, oiling the body can help unclog all the parts in the body and increase the blood flow.
Drink Bishop's weed seed tea: Bishop s weed seeds (called Ajwain seeds in Hindi) can be found in practically any grocery or departmental store and many health and clinical stores as well. This Ayurvedic flavour is very useful for pain and in addition constipation. It can be securely taken by anyone.
Kati Vasti: Kati Vasti is a miraculous Ayurvedic treatment very effective for various ailments connecting to the lower back and spine. The treatment involves retention of specially prepared warm medicated oil over the lower back or other parts of the spine for a certain period, to tackle all types of backpain, sciatica, spondylosis, and also to cure disc prolapse and spinal dislocations.
Cold/Heat therapy: Cold therapy can help reduce inflammation, muscle spasm, and pain. Cold therapy may be recommended immediately following a sprain or strain. Apply cold to your back using cold packs, ice cubes, iced towels/compresses, or take a cool bath.

Lower Back Pain - How Ayurveda Can Help You Get Relief?

Every person is familiar with the remark  Stop fidgeting  but does anybody ever wonder why do humans fidget? Is there any scientific reason for such an action? This article will throw light on the underlying causes for what is known as fidgeting.

Fidgeting and its underlying causes

Scientific research has revealed that fidgeting has many benefits still most people get annoyed when they see another person twitching and tapping. Most people do this seemingly without any control over their movement when they are ordered to be still. Research shows that there is at least one biological reason to back this action.
Since the same brain area is used for movement and speech, it is only natural that gestures are interlinked with thorough preparation for a speech. People tend to move their hands more when they are looking for a word to say, but are not being able to find it. In a recent study, it was found that school children between the age of 6-8 years who use their hands a lot can come up with the right answers during lessons.
While this is one theory, another neurological theory suggests that a portion of the mental load is off-loaded through the process of fidgeting when people have to tackle complex problems or thoughts. The theory is called cognitive load hypothesis. The offloading mechanism frees up the mental faculties thus, devoting them to the mental process. While this may not be a definitive explanation for fidgeting, it does go to show that there is a link between a person s hand movements and their thought and speech process.
Other reasons for fidgeting

Other than the cognitive advantages, some evidence has also been found linking fidgeting with metabolism. People who fidget are found to have a higher metabolism and lower BMI. This difference can be seen between thin and overweight people. Fidgeting amidst lollygagging during the day helps burn up to 350 calories a day. Also, fidgeting among other incidental physical activity helps keep an individual fit.
Among other reasons, fidgeting also serves as a coping mechanism for people with ADD. If a person is engaged in something that he/she is not interested in then the additional sensory-motor input that is even slightly stimulating or entertaining helps the brain to get completely engaged. This helps to maintain focus on the actual activity being performed by the individual.
So, fidgeting helps distract that part of the brain that is getting bored. This helps the other parts of the brain focus better on the actual activity. This is known as floating attention which perhaps is an evolutionary trait that dates back to prehistoric times. In those times, the ability to focus entirely on a task with undivided attention was not favorable to the human since doing so could make them unaware of the enormous ravenous beast hiding behind the bushes.
Thus, though there is some degree of understanding is there when it comes to fidgeting, more research studies are required to gain further insight. Consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

Fidgeting - Why Do We Do It?

Humans are social animals who thrive on reciprocality. It is in our basic nature to be socially courteous, and the word 'No' feels like a conflict that warns a potential relationship. Many of us tend to comply with every single request that is put forward to us by our peers, family, or at the workplace by our superiors. We choose to take up more jobs than we can efficiently handle and put unnecessary stress on ourselves even at the cost of our time and well-being. Must we always do that? 

Why is it so hard to say 'No'?

People have the notion that saying 'No' can come across as rude or uncaring. You may feel that you are letting someone down by turning down their request or risking a relationship. But, it has mostly to do with your self-confidence than your relationships with people. It may branch from overbearing parents, high expectations set by your peers and mentors or experiencing parenthood yourself and setting unreasonable standards for yourself. Childhood influences are usually the biggest cause of people always saying  yes  all the time.

People who have low self-confidence tend to value their own needs less than the needs of others. Saying 'No' feels rude, and no one wants to be impolite.

Well... saying 'No' does not mean you are being rude or disagreeable.

At the end of the day, it is more about how you say 'no', rather than just saying the word 'No'. Saying 'No' is about valuing and respecting your own time and priorities. 

How to start saying say 'No'?
If you want to take a step back and start saying 'No' to make sure your own needs are valued, here s what you need to do.

Refuse politely, when it seems not possible: Do not overcomplicate responses and try to be as simple in your responses as you can be. If you are asked to do something, and you want to say 'no', try to be polite in your body language and state that it is not convenient for you at the moment and that you would rather get back to it later.
Seek time before committing: The transition from saying  yes  all the time to saying no does take time! Start to give yourself more time and ask people to get back to you later. This way you can begin to build more self-confidence and learn to say no over time. This also allows you to evaluate your response instead of immediately saying yes or no to the person asking the favor or task.
Do not feel guilty: Deep down if you want to do a favor, you can go ahead with it, but you should also understand that it is okay to say no, and there is no need to associate guilt with it. You should set boundaries and allow people around you to understand how much favors they can ask you for instead of presenting you with an endless amount of favors from you.
Set your boundaries: Refusal does not amount to rejection as you have just as much right to say  no  as the person who is asking the favor from you. You are simply turning down a request, and in most situations, there is a middle ground for compromises where both you and the requester can be satisfied. If you have limited time to fulfill a request, let the person know and help out only as much as you can without overstepping your boundaries.
Bringing in these changes can help you be more self-confident, and at the same time enable you to say no when you need to without weighing yourself down with expectations and fear or rejection.

Simple Steps To Help You Say No!

Marriage or any healthy relationship, is a bonding and not a binding. Finding the right person and living happily ever after is only true in fairy tales. In reality, once you find the right partner, maintaining and nurturing the relationship bond itself takes a lifetime and living happily solely depends on how you cultivate relationship with your partner.

Communication is one of the chief ingredients besides trust, understanding, love, care, companionship and empathy in a happy and successful marriage. And, failure to communicate is one of the foremost reasons for the failure of relationships. Do you say I love you and appreciate your partner or do you just criticise and complain about him/her all day long? Do you consider his/her ideas and feelings or always turn them down? To communicate effectively is to express yourself freely to your partner, convey your likes and dislikes, convey what turns you on and what doesn't! Unless and until you are vocal about your thoughts and feelings, how do you expect your partner to understand you? You feel frustrated and upset because things don't happen your way but have you tried to 'express' your way to your partner?

Lack of communication in relationships results in frustration, misunderstandings, unrealistic expectations, guilt and can create personal differences. It is difficult for people who share their lives with each other to coexist for long without having regular and smooth communication for oiling the machinery of the relationship.

Couples who communicate effectively are not always devoid of arguments. Arguments happen because there is a difference of opinion between the partners; which is a very normal thing. Arguments usually end in nasty and bitter manner. However, it is up to us to convert that unhealthy argument into a healthy one! Most of us indulge in these arguments to win; not to resolve the matter! What is important is the 'progress' in the matter at hand, not the victory.

Remember, not to engage in any serious discussion or disclosure when angry as you tend to lose balance and rational reasoning. The same holds true in a situation where your partner is not up to it. Receptivity is of utmost importance. A 'No' from a partner does not mean not now, not ever. It simply means I don't want to do that right now! Feeling free to say no if the request is unappealing at that point in time.

Communication cues that can help improve the quality of argument:

Remember, there is no blaming game! WHAT is Right is more important than WHO is right.
Use I statements instead of You always statements. Example I feel angry vs. You always humiliate me. When you use I statements, you're taking the onus on you.
Attack the issue; not each other!
Refrain from the 4 C's : Caustic (sarcasm), Compare, Condemn and Criticize.
Avoid mind-reading your partner and assuming things; instead express yourself verbally.
Using 'I feel' statements are better over You are ones. When you say I feel, you're taking the onus for your feelings and thoughts and avoiding direct blame on your partner.
Have an open mind. Minds are like parachutes; they work best when open. Be proactive and open to changes, alternatives and work effectively for resolving a conflict.
Stay away from Stereotyping (generalizing - all men are like that...) 'Gunnysacking; (nursing past grievances and bringing them up for review while trying to resolve a present conflict).
No engaging in 'Summarizing self-syndrome' where both partners continue to restate his/her stance and issues without actually listening to other and without understanding other's perspective, feeling frustrated.
Cut back on 'Catastrophizing' i.e. dwelling on the worst possible outcomes of a problem or risk that you face, to the point that even remote, unlikely disasters preoccupy your attention. Often, objectivity becomes clouded, and you may gradually begin to feel or act as though these unlikely events are really going to happen.
Get rid of 'Stereotyping'; (generalizing - all men are like..) and 'Gunnysacking' (cropping up issues from the past having no relevance to current problem).
Don't send double messages- statements which have two conflicting meanings. Keep it as simple and assertive as possible.
A mind is like a parachute, it doesn't work unless it is open. So have a broad perspective, try to understand your partner's perspective and try and arrive at a mutually agreeable decision that caters to well-being as a whole. Matrimony is the high sea for which no compass has yet been invented. What counts in making a happy marriage is not how much compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility. Marriage was, is and never will be perfect, Yet it is the happiest wrong we are doing on earth!

Are You Happily (n)Ever After?

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