 I have a severe stomach ache, I feel like vomiting ... Mom, please!! I can't go for exam.
 I read it! I knew it all ... But I just blacked out.  
 I just couldn't write! My hands were trembling.  
 I messed up this question! I can do nothing right... I can never succeed in life!!  

It's not uncommon for students to experience such problems before/ during an exam.

Most of us suffer from some degree of anxiety when we prepare or sit for an examination. Examination usually leads to a lot of tension and anxiety commonly known as examination phobia. Examination phobia or Examophobia is a mental disorder found in most of the students. When exams arrive, students become extremely worried and make plans about how to study, how to perform better and get good grades. Some students find exams so difficult that the phobia makes them sick as they simply find themselves unable to cope up with the exam fear. There may be sweating, palpitations that disturb so much that one cannot think straight and end up messing up the paper. Also, in subsequent exams, it becomes worse and the fear intensifies. The person may end up feeling a failure, feeling guilty and may even be suicidal! 

Anxiety is a normal human feeling that is part of life and can often serve as a good form of adrenaline. However, in few people, this adrenaline rush exceeds normal limits and at times may lead to some negative consequences.

Exam anxiety is:

1. Excessive worry about upcoming exams 
2. Fear of being evaluated 
3. Apprehension about the consequence 
4. Experienced by many normal students

POSSIBLE CAUSES 
(I) Environmental Causes

1. High expectations of parents 
2. Parents imposing their ambitions on children 
3. Parents competing for higher social status through child's scores 
4. Constant comparison with other kids 
5. Fear of teachers 
6. Insulting remarks from teachers

(II) Poor studying styles: 
1. Inefficient:

1. Irregular coverage of the entire syllabus 
2. Trying to memorize the course book 
3. Binge learning 
4. Studying all-night right before exams

2. Ineffective:

1. Reading without understanding the topic 
2. Unable to recollect the material 
3. Not making revision notes 
4. Not revising

(III) Psychological factors:

1. Feeling little or no control over the exam situation (rather than knowing and applying exam strategies) 
2. Negative thinking and self-criticism 
3. Irrational thinking about exams and outcomes 
4. Irrational beliefs  If I don't pass, my (family/boyfriend/girlfriend/friends) will lose respect for me  
5. Irrational demands  I have to get at least 98% or I am worthless.  
6. Catastrophic predictions  I'll fail no matter what I do there s no point.  
7. Low Self-esteem 
8. Fear of failure

SYMPTOMS OF EXAM ANXIETY 
The symptoms can range from minor nervousness to a panic attack, which can ruin the test. But whatever the level of your anxiety, learning to keep yourself calm and managing the fear of sitting for an examination is what it takes to come out with flying colors.

1. Physical symptoms. Headache, nausea, diarrhea, excessive sweating, shortness of breath, rapid heartbeat, lightheadedness and feeling faint can all occur. Test anxiety can lead to a panic attack, which is the abrupt onset of intense fear or discomfort in which individuals may feel like they are unable to breathe or having a heart attack. 
2. Emotional symptoms. Feelings of anger, fear, helplessness and disappointment are common emotional responses to test anxiety. 
3. Behavioral/Cognitive symptoms. Difficulty concentrating, thinking negatively and comparing yourself to others are common symptoms of test anxiety.

HOW TO PREPARE WELL FOR AN EXAMINATION 
Fortunately, there are several methods that you can adopt to reduce your examination stress, which will not only help you to get higher grades but also improve your overall mental health.

1. Regular Studies Develop good study habits- ATTEND classes regularly, finish all the assignments on time, make notes properly and be an actively engaging student in school. Leave plenty of time to revise so that you don't have to do last minute cramming. Giving yourself adequate time will help to boost your confidence and reduce any pre-exam stress as you know you have prepared well. Instead of waiting for the eleventh hour, start studying as and when the academic year commences. With a good amount of time before hand, you will certainly feel more relaxed as you have plenty of time to give-in your best. 
2. Exercise Matters - It is of paramount importance to maintain mental, psychological and physical health to ace any exam. Exercising regularly, deep breathing and  pranayama  help in improving one s cognitive faculties, that results in lesser anxiety and simultaneously better grades in the tests. 
3. Don t Undermine the Importance of Diet - Be careful about your diet during the exams. A diet lacking in essential nutrients can put a major dent in your preparations; make you feel nauseated, SLEEPY OR overstressed during the crucial hours. 
4. SLEEP WELL - Adequate sleep is also vital. SLEEPING TOO LESS OR TOO MUCH CAN ALSO HAMPER YOUR ABILITIES 
5. Support - Take short breaks in between and spend some quality time with your family; share your feelings and state of mind with them. Spending time with the family can turn out to be a major stress buster. 
6. Set a Study Time: Lastly, drawing up a schedule will help you make the most of your study time. Set aside a time for your studies and follow it meticulously. Keep it flexible so that you can make the necessary adjustments. 
7. Stay focused: Concentrate on your studies, not others during the examination time. Avoid talking with other students about the subject before an examination. 
8. Use Mnemonics: Mnemonics are the techniques of memorization. You can make chart, rhymes or phrase to memorize your lessons. 
9. Practice Deep Breathing Regularly - Meditation is one of the best medicine that can reduce your anxiety. Make a habit to Meditate at least 10 minutes per day. It surely increases your concentration power. 
10. Consult Psychologist: If your anxiety becomes uncontrollable, don t hesitate to consult a psychologist or therapist. CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) is pretty effective in treating anxiety disorders. It helps to change your thought process and negative beliefs. Performance or test anxiety is highly treatable so you can get absolutely get a better result.

HOW TO ATTEMPT THE EXAMINATION IN BEST POSSIBLE WAY 
(I) ON THE DAY OF EXAM

1. Get a restful, uninterrupted sleep the night before so you wake up refreshed and revitalized the day of the exam. 
2. Have a healthy breakfast but strictly avoid oily and heavy food 
3. Recheck your required stuff (pen, pencil, compass box, eraser, admit card, watch etc) before leaving home. 
4. Take the water bottle along with you to the examination hall. 
5. Avoid touching new/left-out topic at the last moment. 
6. Aim to reach the examination hall well in time. 
7. Avoid being part of Before-exam peer discussions on How well-prepared or unprepared others are! The classic  Tera kitna ho gaya  question followed by undue comparisons can be a complete confidence killer. So Beware !! 
8. If feeling tensed, take deep-long breaths and engage in positive self-talk; reminding yourself that you prepared best to your ability and tell oneself   I CAN DO IT  

(II) IN THE EXAMINATION HALL

First of all, fill the required information on the answer sheet. 
Read the instructions carefully to figure out if you have a choice of questions, no. of questions to be attempted etc. 
Read the question paper thoroughly before u begin writing and mark the questions under 3 categories: (a) Easy (b) Manageable (c) Difficult 
Manage your time: This is where you strictly need to stick to the plan:
Before you begin, allocate time for each question based on the marks it carries and difficulty level. 
If you are not able to complete an answer within planned time-frame, leave some space and move onto the next question. 
Always divide time in such a way that you are left with some time at the end to go back over incomplete answers and revise/recheck. 
Always try to attempt all the questions. 
Attempt the Easy questions first, followed by Manageable and Difficult questions at last. That way you stay secure, calm and confident. 
Avoid writing too lengthy answer just because you know it well.
5. Presentation:

a. Handwriting should be neat & readable. 
b. Instead of very long paragraphs, put your answer point-wise. 
c. Wherever possible, illustrate the information via Flowcharts/diagrams etc. 
d. Highlight: underline or highlight the main points using pencil / coloured markers but you should keep it for last spare moments.

(III) TIPS FOR PARENTS: 
Encourage your kids! Parents have the ability to address underlying fears that may be present with test-taking. At a deep level, even subconsciously, a student may fear failure for a variety of reasons. There could be a fear of looking dumb to friends, of not getting into the best school, or of not meeting parent s expectations. A great help is for parents to reinforce their unconditional support and encouragement to the child. Parents, let your children know that their grade does not determine their worth. Believe in your child. 

Help them get over the myth that  Success in exam is a predictor of success in life . 

Good marks = Great job. 
Poor marks = End of life!!

In short,  There are no secrets to success. It is the result of Time Management, Hard work and Learning from mistakes 

Say Goodbye To Exam Phobia!

How to brush off stress from your life

Current lifestyle is such that stress becomes inevitable. But you might be aware how disastrous stress can be, it does take control of our lives. What one needs to consciously do is, take steps to address the stress that they are under. 
Here are simple and effective ways to do it.

1) indulge in physical activities - most of us have sedentary lifestyles which add to stress. While indulging in workouts won't take away your stress, what will happen is that there will be clarity in your thoughts, and your emotional intensity will come down, calming you.
2) believe every problem has a solution - it is easy to be scared of the problem and let it take control of your mind &amp; your life. Take control of them. Try to actively address your problem and look for solutions. When you act towards solving your problem, irrespective of the solution, your mind has more positive in it than stress.
3) give it away - meet people, socialize, and connect with other lives. This is actually going to solve half your problem. Not only will more things occupy your mind, and you will know of other people's problems too, but at times, sharing your stress problem warranties a quick solution!
4) treasure yourself - take some time for yourself and do what you love to do the most. Go to the spa, go shopping, read or just sleep. But make sure you have time away from work and daily chores, where you can rejuvenate your sense by doing what makes you the happiest. If nothing, meet up with friends.
5) indulge in volunteering work - helping others not only preoccupies your mind with problems of others rather than staying immersed in your own, but also helps you be more resilient. You will come out stronger and with more will to address your own issues.
6) try to stay positive all the time - appreciate what you have rather than concentrate on what you don't. Be thankful.
7) accept what you cannot change - however much we try to solve our problems, some things we cannot resolve right at the time. And there is no point in pondering over them. Accept that this is how things will be, and move on.

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How To Brush Off Stress From Your Life

You may think that it is just a harmless drink or two at the end of the day to help you relax. it's just a few drinks when you get together with friends. or it's just that you need to get rid of the office stress. We all need to catch a break sometimes, which makes our favorite brand of drink our best friend. Trouble starts when 'a drink or two' moves to a level where you can't hold the drink anymore. It affects your ability to think straight and take decisions that you may regret in retrospect. Alcoholism not only has serious health consequences but also can ruin your life and relationships. Don't tread down the path of self destruction, or this is what you'll find:
1.        Conflict: It is not a coincidence that fights are common when one or both partners are caught up with alcohol abuse. It is said that if there is too much alcohol in your system, it hampers with your ability to make rational decisions. It allows you to become inconsiderate about others, and give more importance your addiction over their requirements. It, to an extent, numbs you to what others feel, and makes you drink even more.
2.        Financial loss: Alcohol costs money. And the more you spend to keep up with your addiction, the more money flows out of your monthly household expenses, monthly savings and retirement plans. And this money literally goes down the drain. Like any other addiction, once you start alcohol abuse, you need it everyday. Drinking may go on to impact your ability to hold on to your job as no one will eventually want to hire someone who has alcohol on their breath at 9 am during client meetings. Alcohol is a strict restriction in certain professions where you may put other people at risk. At the very best, you'll be left with a warning. At the worst, you'll lose your job and end up with no work and no money to support your addiction.
3.        Accident prone: In 2014, 9,967 people died in drunk driving crashes - one every 53 minutes. This may sound only like a statistic to you - until you speak to the families who lost their loved ones or have to see them suffer through loss of limbs or brain function to bear lifelong suffering. And as far as you are concerned, you may end up seeing the wrong end of a prison. Such things have a profound impact on your relationship - many of which fail to last through the ordeal. 
4.        Infidelity: You've seen it a thousand times in movies - which actually might get reflected in reality, if you wake up next to someone whose name you don't know. 
5.        Infertility: Alcohols and babies don't mix. Too much alcohol intake can stop women from making and keeping a baby. 
6.        Divorce: An alcoholic husband or wife is a valid ground of mental trauma applicable in a divorce. 

6 Ways How Alcohol Abuse Can Ruin Your Relationship

Genetics is a fascinating subject which has received much attention during present times in the field of medical science as it gives the solutions to many a puzzle. The same applies to the hard to pronounce medical term  schizophrenia  that refers to a mental disorder which disrupts the innate human ability to feel, express, behave, and think clearly.

The condition is a chronic illness, and the disorder may last for years or even a lifetime. Often considered to be the most disabling of mental illnesses, schizophrenia does not refer to multiple or split-personalities. It is more about psychosis where patients become unable to differentiate between reality and fiction.

How does the condition manifest itself?
The symptoms of schizophrenia are rendered into three categories. The positive signs include delusions, hallucination, movement disorders, and dysfunctional, and unusual ways of thought. The negative symptoms include the inability to experience happiness or pleasure in everyday life, reduced talking, and difficulty in sustaining or beginning any activity. While  positive  means exaggerating certain behavior in this context, the term  negative  does not imply bad behavior, but the absence of regular behavior patterns. Then follows the cognitive aspect (the subtlest behavior changes) which includes trouble in paying attention, or problems with using memory, etc.

What could be the possible causes?
There s no specific reason that may cause schizophrenia; however, some factors play an important role in making a person have this mental condition. Various environmental factors are suspected to be responsible for the condition; these may include viral infections, excessive exposure to toxins like marijuana, extreme stress, etc. In some instances, schizophrenia can occur solely due to abnormalities or chemical imbalances in the brain. Experts note that a history of schizophrenia in the family tree can increase the risk of schizophrenia in future generations.

Who can develop schizophrenia?
Schizophrenia can develop at any age. However, it is during the teenage years or the 20s when the condition takes effect. Though rare, it can sometimes invade the minds of children below five years of age.

How can it be treated?
There s no cure available for schizophrenia. However, the periods of recovery from this illness and its symptoms can be reduced through various possible treatments. These include medication and psychosocial therapy, supportive psychotherapy or cognitive behavioral therapy, electroconvulsive therapy, and psychosurgery. The administration of these procedures can reduce the chances of recurrence and relapse. Sometimes hospitalization may become necessary as a part of treatment to stabilize patients that do not have anyone to take care of them at home.

Modern medicine is yet to discover failsafe remedies for schizophrenia. Early diagnosis and treatment can reduce the condition in patients. Hospitalization can reduce the chances of a relapse and can prevent the mental condition from worsening. The moment any sign of schizophrenia is noticed, one is strongly advised to opt for psychological treatment. These actions can help to reduce disruptions in a patient s personal and social life.

Schizophrenia - How Does The Condition Manifests?

What is Addiction?

Addiction is a condition in which individual engages in using a substance or seeking a behaviour which leads to rewarding effects in the brain and it reinforce the individual to repeat the using or seeking behaviour again and again. Addiction develops gradually over a period of time and due to the repetition of same pleasure seeking pattern individual become physically and psychologically dependent on the substance or to any other object at the center of addiction.

People can get addicted to many substances like, alcohol, nicotine, drugs, solvents, etc. In case of these substances, physical and mental dependency both can occur. There are other objects and behaviours which also activate brain reward system in the same way and can make people dependent on them, like gambling, shopping, videogames, watching pornography, etc. But in case of these objects or behaviours, psychological dependency can be more prominent.

It has been seen that there are lots of other mental problems found among individuals suffering from any kind of addiction, like anxiety, depression, personality disorders, psychosis, etc. Individual who is addicted to a substance or an object or behaviour indulge into compulsive pattern of seeking the same inspite of their detrimental consequences. Consequences of addiction can be seen on person s health, personal life, occupational life and social life. Addiction can lead to severe unmanageability in one s life.

Especially when it comes to substances, like alcohol, nicotine or any kind of drugs, we must understand how the tolerance level of the brain develops? Tolerance develops when an individual no longer responds to a substance in the way he/she did at first. So, it takes a higher dose of the substance to achieve the same effect as when the individual first used it. This is why people with substance use disorders use more and more of a drug to get the  high  feeling that they seek.



A blog posted by an alcoholic:

 I always wished I could drink like other people. But I never could. I thought it was the third drink that got me into trouble. If I only had two, then I d be fine. Thing is, once I put that first drink to my lips, I could no longer accurately predict what would happen next. I might go home, but I might not.

You d think if I made it home, then my drinking was a success. Wrong! If I made it home after two drinks, there was an insatiable need raging within me and I was gonna take it out on you.  After all, you re the reason why I had to come home. I would punish my family by being silent, or mean, or emotionally distant.

Looking back, it was never intentional. I didn t purposely choose not to go home.  I didn t leave the house with a suitcase containing a fresh set of clothes, a tooth brush and my cosmetics. Seriously, I was only going out for  a few. 

If anybody can relate to this or can understand this, he or she can understand tolerance, powerlessness and unmanageability.

How to recover from addiction?

To be an addict can t be anybody s choice, but recovery can be one s choice. The first key step to come out of your addiction is developing acceptance. For a person to admit their powerlessness in addiction to drugs or alcohol or to any other object at the center of addiction is a monumental first step to recovery. Powerlessness means the person do not have any control over his/her use of substance. Powerlessness may indicate weakness and helplessness; some may think it fosters a victim mentality. Acceptance starts developing when a person admit that he or she is powerless over the substance or object at the center of addiction and their life have become unmanageable because of that.

Addiction is a disease and recovery is not an easy process. Individuals who are already into the grip of addiction need to seek help. One cannot go through the journey of recovery alone. There is a myth that addiction is a habit and one can get out of it if he or she has the  Will Power . It s actually not true. To get out of the disease you need to develop  Skill Power , like skills to understand your physical and psychological mechanisms when it comes to the substance or the object of addictions, skills to handle cravings, skills to be assertive enough to manage social cues, skills to deal with day to day life stressors, etc. And in this process of developing skills and maintaining your recovery you need help of professionals.

A complete treatment program has three important approaches. First one is psychopharmacological (medicine) approach, second is psychotherapeutic approach and the third one is the 12 step program of alcohol/narcotics anonymous. A combination of psychotherapies along with the basic essence of 12 step program can bring greater outcomes in individual suffering from addiction.

Understanding Addiction And The Key Steps To Recover From It!

Do you have someone who is passive-aggressive in your life? Perhaps your parents, your siblings, your partner or your friends? It can be difficult to handle such a person. When two people, who are having a healthy relationship with each other are angry with each other, they show anger, they say that they are upset, they discuss things and sort things out. There are so many different ways to express anger. But when it comes to a person with passive-aggressive behaviour, it is not going to be the same when they are angry. This is basically a way to express anger indirectly, as they are unable to or uncomfortable to express their feelings and anger openly.

They need help, and it is you who will be able to help them get out of this pain or anger. Here are six steps to changing someone's passive-aggressive behaviour:

When there is an argument going on between both of you or when one of you is angry, do not say something or do something negative. This will make them shut down completely and they will never open up. It may also happen that the situation gets worse. So, take some time and calm down.
Do not go for any guesswork. You are trying to help someone to get over his/her passive-aggressive behaviour. You need to know what they actually feel. So, ask them how they feel and if they have anything to say about it. This can help them open up.
Brainstorming can be one of the best steps. Yes, if you think that you often argue on some common point, then you need to come up with a solution for it first. Ask for their opinion, make a list of all the points and try to make it as detailed as possible.
Check out the pros and cons of your opinions. When you are done with brainstorming, you need to consider each opinion or decision you made in order to make sure that both of you are comfortable with it.
Choose a win-win situation. In other words, pick up those solutions which make both of you happy.
Execute your opinion or plan and evaluate if it is working for you. If plan A does not work for you, then you can still consider the other options that you left behind to draft a plan B.
Communication is very important and when you are able to communicate well, you will be able to get what you actually need. You should start to think that your feelings are valid and learn to enjoy how good it feels when others value your feelings. Open up and talk!

Passive Aggressive Nature - 6 Things You Can Do To Help!

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