Marriage or any healthy relationship, is a bonding and not a binding. Finding the right person and living happily ever after is only true in fairy tales. In reality, once you find the right partner, maintaining and nurturing the relationship bond itself takes a lifetime and living happily solely depends on how you cultivate relationship with your partner.

Communication is one of the chief ingredients besides trust, understanding, love, care, companionship and empathy in a happy and successful marriage. And, failure to communicate is one of the foremost reasons for the failure of relationships. Do you say I love you and appreciate your partner or do you just criticise and complain about him/her all day long? Do you consider his/her ideas and feelings or always turn them down? To communicate effectively is to express yourself freely to your partner, convey your likes and dislikes, convey what turns you on and what doesn't! Unless and until you are vocal about your thoughts and feelings, how do you expect your partner to understand you? You feel frustrated and upset because things don't happen your way but have you tried to 'express' your way to your partner?

Lack of communication in relationships results in frustration, misunderstandings, unrealistic expectations, guilt and can create personal differences. It is difficult for people who share their lives with each other to coexist for long without having regular and smooth communication for oiling the machinery of the relationship.

Couples who communicate effectively are not always devoid of arguments. Arguments happen because there is a difference of opinion between the partners; which is a very normal thing. Arguments usually end in nasty and bitter manner. However, it is up to us to convert that unhealthy argument into a healthy one! Most of us indulge in these arguments to win; not to resolve the matter! What is important is the 'progress' in the matter at hand, not the victory.

Remember, not to engage in any serious discussion or disclosure when angry as you tend to lose balance and rational reasoning. The same holds true in a situation where your partner is not up to it. Receptivity is of utmost importance. A 'No' from a partner does not mean not now, not ever. It simply means I don't want to do that right now! Feeling free to say no if the request is unappealing at that point in time.

Communication cues that can help improve the quality of argument:

Remember, there is no blaming game! WHAT is Right is more important than WHO is right.
Use I statements instead of You always statements. Example I feel angry vs. You always humiliate me. When you use I statements, you're taking the onus on you.
Attack the issue; not each other!
Refrain from the 4 C's : Caustic (sarcasm), Compare, Condemn and Criticize.
Avoid mind-reading your partner and assuming things; instead express yourself verbally.
Using 'I feel' statements are better over You are ones. When you say I feel, you're taking the onus for your feelings and thoughts and avoiding direct blame on your partner.
Have an open mind. Minds are like parachutes; they work best when open. Be proactive and open to changes, alternatives and work effectively for resolving a conflict.
Stay away from Stereotyping (generalizing - all men are like that...) 'Gunnysacking; (nursing past grievances and bringing them up for review while trying to resolve a present conflict).
No engaging in 'Summarizing self-syndrome' where both partners continue to restate his/her stance and issues without actually listening to other and without understanding other's perspective, feeling frustrated.
Cut back on 'Catastrophizing' i.e. dwelling on the worst possible outcomes of a problem or risk that you face, to the point that even remote, unlikely disasters preoccupy your attention. Often, objectivity becomes clouded, and you may gradually begin to feel or act as though these unlikely events are really going to happen.
Get rid of 'Stereotyping'; (generalizing - all men are like..) and 'Gunnysacking' (cropping up issues from the past having no relevance to current problem).
Don't send double messages- statements which have two conflicting meanings. Keep it as simple and assertive as possible.
A mind is like a parachute, it doesn't work unless it is open. So have a broad perspective, try to understand your partner's perspective and try and arrive at a mutually agreeable decision that caters to well-being as a whole. Matrimony is the high sea for which no compass has yet been invented. What counts in making a happy marriage is not how much compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility. Marriage was, is and never will be perfect, Yet it is the happiest wrong we are doing on earth!

Are You Happily (n)Ever After?

Manic depression, also known as bipolar disorder in recent days, is a major mood disorder characterized by hypomanic or manic episodes (deviation from one's usual mood along with abnormally high energy levels). Mania involves sleeplessness, along with psychosis, hallucinations, rage, grandiose delusions or paranoia. Mania or hypomania isn t usually harmful to the patient and they might exhibit increased capacity for work and creativity. Depressive episodes however, can be debilitating and often life threatening as the person becomes self-destructive and suicidal in many instances. 

The extent of mood swings can vary from extreme to very mild. They can occur progressively or suddenly and might last for few days to weeks. Patients affected by bipolar disorder may experience disturbances in thinking apart from depressive or manic episodes. Distortions of perception and impaired social functioning are also not uncommon. The cause of bipolar disorder is not fully understood like most mental health conditions and is often thought to be hereditary.

The extent of the seriousness of the bipolar symptoms varies from person to person. In some people, the disorder is not full blown and they don t exhibit all the symptoms. Others who aren t that lucky might have to be hospitalized multiple times in their lives as the symptoms creep into their work and personal life and make living a normal life a tough challenge. 

Psychotic symptoms such as disorganized thinking, hallucinations and delusions might make a person do things that demand the urgency of hospitalization to keep them safe from their suicidal impulses. These symptoms might need to be urgently addressed by a psychiatrist and with the help of medications, the person might be able to regain control of their lives.

The symptoms of bipolar disorder are many and can be mainly categorized into two (sometimes overlapping) categories of mania or hypomania and depression:

Manic symptoms include: 

Grandiose delusions (delusion of grandeur) 
Racing thoughts which are often disconnected
Sense of euphoria or false elation
Irritability without cause
Hampered social functioning
Increased sexual inclination and risky sexual behavior
Hyperactivity
Increase in talking volume or speed
Impaired judgment
Reduced sleep requirements owing to extra energy levels
Increased productivity and creativity
Depressive symptoms include:

Abnormal eating patterns like over or under-eating to the extent of severe medical complications accompanied by drastic changes in weight
Difficulty in concentration, making decisions and remembering
Lack of energy or fatigue 
Contemplating about death for prolonged periods of time and suicidal behavior
Oversleeping, insomnia or early awakening
Persistent pessimism 
Irritability and restlessness
Feeling of hopeless and negative attitude
Mood stabilizers, such as lithium are commonly employed to treat bipolar disorder. Anti convulsants, benzodiazepines and anti psychotics can also be used in the treatment. Along with medications, support from family and friends is of the utmost importance as they need to help provide all the support required in making the person functional and healthy.

Manic Depressive Disorder - 11 Signs to Help You Spot it 

Post-traumatic stress disorder is a serious mental health condition that can affect every aspect of a person s life. With proper management, therapy and support, this disorder can be successfully treated. 

PTSD Causes 
Researchers usually believe that post-traumatic stress disorder is not caused by any one single factor. Rather, a variety of predispositions and risk factors, work together that leads to the development of PTSD following a traumatic event. The most commonly cited causes are:

Genetic Factors: Anxiety disorders are hereditary and PTSD also tends to run in families. People having first-degree relatives struggling with any anxiety disorder are at a higher risk of developing the disorder themselves. While it is not a definitive cause for PTSD, exposure to a traumatic event does make a person more vulnerable to developing the disorder.
Environmental Causes: Those having a history of trauma or stress are more susceptible to PTSD than those who do not have a similar history. Children growing up in families marred by addiction problems are more predisposed to such a condition.
Brain Structures: Certain areas of the brain that are believed to regulate fear and emotions are varied in people diagnosed with this condition as compared to them who have not developed PTSD after a traumatic event.
Psychological Factors: People struggling with certain types of mental disorders, notably depression and anxiety are at a greater risk of developing post-traumatic stress disorder.

PTSD is caused due to exposure to a traumatic incident or frightening event such as sexual assault, natural disaster, war, accidents or the threat of death/death or any grave illness to one s self or a dear one. Post-traumatic stress disorder is a lifelong consequence of any such extreme traumatic event that affects a person s ability to deal with such an incident.

Most of the times, people having been exposed to trauma develop feelings of shock, fear, anger, anxiety and guilt.
These reactions are completely normal in regard to an unnatural event and eventually fade over time. A person diagnosed with PTSD develops unusual strong feelings post such an event that they hinder the person from leading a meaningful (normal) life. Sadly, the symptoms of PTSD don t fade with time and these feelings amplify till the person is so overwhelmed that they are unable to function.
This disorder can occur at any age. It has even been observed during the first year of an individual s life. Symptoms generally begin to appear by the first three months following the traumatic incident but it can also start showing up months or years later.
Certain individuals who have been exposed to a disturbing experience might develop symptoms of PTSD directly after experiencing such an event. This is known as acute stress disorder. People having acute stress disorder experience a varying amalgamation and duration of the symptoms, but most of them usually recover within three months of the causative event.
Some people with an acute stress disorder experience prolonged periods of symptoms that may be triggered by memories of the traumatic incident.


Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - 4 Things That Can Lead To It!

Like everyone else, teenagers are susceptible to anger. When this gets out of control, it can lead to problems at school as well as at home. One of the major reasons for this is that teenagers do not know how to channel their anger and control it. When teaching teenagers how to manage their anger, it is important to understand that each child is different and will respond to anger differently. Here are a few tips that could help.

Recognize triggers and warning signs: Most anger outbursts are triggered by common factors. This could include feeling disrespected, feeling misunderstood, being refused permission or something or feeling as though too much were expected. It is important for teenagers to recognize these triggers so that they can deal with them in a better way. An anger outburst is also often preceded by certain physiological changes. For example, a person s breath could quicken or they may begin to clench their muscles before getting angry. Recognizing these early signs can help teens control their anger and not allow the situation to escalate.
Develop a vocabulary: Most teenagers throw tantrums and slam doors because they do not have words to express their anger and end up getting more and more frustrated with themselves and the situation. Hence, help your teenager develop a vocabulary to express what he or she may be feeling. This could include words like angry, mad, furious, irritated, tense, apprehensive, etc. Encourage them to talk out their anger instead of letting it simmer inside them. When your child does say things like  you re making me angry  etc do not immediately discipline him but instead talk it out. They may also be encouraged to write out their anger or find other creative outlets for it.
Deep breathing: Deep breathing is an anger management technique that helps adults and children alike. Teach your child how to take a few deep breaths before lashing out at someone. Show your child how to inhale slowly, hold the breath and exhale slowly while counting to five. This can help him or her calm down and handle the situation in a better way.
1+3+10: This is a golden rule of anger management. When your teen feels angry he or she needs to tell himself or herself to calm down. This is step 1. Next, they should take 3 deep breaths. This should be followed by counting to ten slowly. This can help them gain control of the situation and prevent an anger outburst.
The above mentioned tips can help in anger management of teen. However, if the condition seems out of control, you can always seek professional help to deal with the situation.

How To Handle Angry Teenagers?

Autism is a kind of developmental disability, which usually crops up before a child attains the age of 3. It is just part of a group of neurological disorders, which involve impaired communication along with impairment in social interaction and cognitive skills. It is better known as Autism spectrum disorder, it might well be linked with a wide variety of traits.

The traits include:

Activities done on a repetitive basis.

Extreme level of resistance to changes brought about in daily routines.

Very unusual reactions to things like touch.

Problem having interactions with the environment.

Children suffering from Autism Spectrum Disorder can have some of the major problems with regard to both speech and carry out communications in a non-verbal manner. Social interactions might also become very difficult propostions for them.

This is where, speech therapy comes to the rescue of these patients. It is the central part of treatment for autistic children. The speech therapy can help take care of a wide variety of communication problems occurring among people with autism.

Common Speech and Communication Problems Associated With Autism

Social communication, development of language and speech can get adversely affected by autism in more than one way.

A person with autism can have the speech problems, wherein they may:

Not communicate at all.

Tend to utter cries, grunts, shrieks, harsh or throaty sounds.

Talk or just hum in a musical manner.

Utter words, might can sound to be alien or robotic.

Often look to repeat whatever another person says.

Around 30% of people, suffering from autism has problem in producing speech sounds to ensure effective communication with others. The language, even if it is present, can be too difficult to be understood by others.

Communication problems can occur in various ways, for people who suffer from autism. The challenges faced by them while communicating are as follows:

Communication requires a person to make eye contact with another person or even make certain gestures. People with autism will have serious trouble in meeting up with the conversational skills.

They would have difficulty in understanding the meaning of words, which are out of context from what they have actually learned.

They would have very little understanding of the meaning of words and symbols.

Treatment through Speech Therapy

Speech therapy can help children get rid of the problems in speaking, as well as those related to communicating and interacting with others. This involves non-verbal skills such as making direct eye contact, taking initiative in conversations and understanding of different kinds of gestures.

This therapy can also teach children the art of expressing themselves by using picture symbols, computers or through sign language.

Five Principles of Speech Therapy

There are basically five principles used as a framework, to work upon in speech therapy with children, suffering from autism. They include:

Establishing Functional Communication In A Spontaneous Manner  

Providing Social Instruction in Different Settings throughout the Day

Target Peer Interactions

Even Provide Training and Support to Other Adults

Look to Fine Tune Communication Skills as Other Areas Improve.

How Speech Therapy Can Help Autistic Children?

A bad habit could range from smoking or drinking to knuckle breaking or nail biting. A bad habit is one that causes or is likely to cause you or the others in your life, harm. Here are eight steps that can help you break your bad habit:

Try to understand your habit: The most important thing to break a bad habit is to know it first. In case that some habit is hurting you then you certainly need to let go of it. You initially need to set your mind about bringing an end to that habit. It is also important to understand how this habit of yours is hurting you or the ones around you.
Change your thinking: Even when we get to know we have some unfortunate habit, more often than not we are not prepared to separate it since we have practised that habit since a long time and it is by all accounts intense to break that one. We have to change our reasoning about the habit and take a look at it in negative viewpoints since a thing having negative perspectives will be simpler to quit.
Begin small: In case that you have a negative behaviour pattern since quite a while then go slow to break it down in light of the fact that a bad habit is hard to separate at once. Try not to attempt to do everything at once since you would not have the capacity to do as such.
Make tiny improvements: Try not to make extreme improvements to your habit since it is your habit and it will some way or another takes its time to break. Rather make little improvements with the goal that it will not aggravate you and soon you will encounter a noteworthy change in your behaviour and afterwards you will separate the habit totally on a more lasting basis.
Change your environment: A few habits are built because of the environment we live in. The steady surrounding makes us construct that habit in a manner that it gets stronger day by day. So in case that you understand that some negative behaviour patterns have overtaken your life and are not going down, attempt to change your surroundings.
Keep a check: Simply going ahead to bring an end to any habit will not give you appropriate results. Keeping a survey helps you in checking on how much of your bad habit you have defeated and how far you are from breaking it completely.
Reward yourself: Offer yourself a reward each time you see that you have stopped behaving in a certain way, or practising a certain habit. This goes a long way in motivating the individual to strive towards that end goal of breaking the habit completely.

Want to Break a Bad Habit - 7 Steps You Must Follow!

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