No matter which kind of relationship couple are in, they always have some issues and look to be happier, and more connected, though the issues can be different for different couples -  money, sex, infidelity, in-laws, children etc. Despite this, any relationship is completely subjective and no clear cut rules can be executed on it. Yet, following certain guidelines may help proceed happily in a relationship.

1.Love yourself

You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy. Accepting yourself fully as you are and showing yourself this same unconditional love will provide protection, healing, and confidence to work on your shortfalls.

2.Adopt a positive lifestyle

There are many different ways in which you can embrace a more positive lifestyle - practice affirmations, express gratitude, meditation, exercise. Just find something that helps you unwind and enjoy life. And most importantly - keep doing these things.

3.Empathize with your partner

The ability to empathize is what inhibits us from just going through life doing whatever we want, without regard for others. It is what makes a compromise in a relationship possible. If you realize that something you've done has hurt another person and you can empathize with his/her pain or unhappiness, you will hesitate to do that again.

4. Take responsibility: Don't try to figure out who's right

When couples come for therapy, one or both tend to think that the primary problem is their partner. Both people co-create the climate of the relationship. And both need to do some things differently to create the marriage or relationship they both really want. If your intention is to create a more positive world for yourself and those around you, it's up to you to have the thoughts, moods, and actions that will create that world.

5. Stay connected

When there is distress in the marriage or relationship, one or both usually feel some emotional disconnection. Frequently, sexual passion diminishes as well. (However, sometimes one partner will try to increase frequency of sex in an effort to feel connected).  And often, people will busy themselves with work or kids instead, or do other things to either try to feel connected or to avoid being alone with the person with whom they feel the pain of disconnection.

6. Express thoughts, feelings, and wishes 

Resentment can build when couples sweep things under the rug, so be vulnerable and don't bury negative feelings, but try to express them in a respectful way. Opening up to your partner can make you feel vulnerable and exposed, but it is the most important part of an intimate relationship.

7. Try new things together

Boredom can be a major obstacle to lasting romantic or companionate love. Psychological research has suggested that couples who experience the most intense love are the ones who enjoy participating in new or challenging 'self-expanding' activities together.

8. Preserve your independence

Neediness and caretaking in long-term partnerships -- which can easily result from looking to the partnership for safety, security and stability -- damper the erotic spark. But if couples can maintain independence and witness each other participating in individual activities at which they're skilled, they can continue to see their partner in an ever-new light.

8 Guidelines for a Happy Relationship

Anger is among the gamut of emotions we exhibit as a reaction to a situation, and it is a'normal' emotion too as long as it is kept under control. Some people have the propensity to explode when pushed to the extreme. They keep swallowing their emotions until they can finally do it no more, and erupt like a volcano. Others dealing with extreme anger are like a ticking time bomb. You'll never know what you unwittingly say or do can trigger an explosion. In either case, anger that cannot be controlled comes with a physical reaction.

Your heart beats faster preparing you for both action and reaction. Your breathing quickens. You may clench your fist, tighten your shoulders and go into a defensive position. The problem arises out of the fact that it is almost impossible to feel anger and empathy at the same time. An angry person is seldom sensitive to the well being of his victim, and hence may lash out verbally and sometimes physically. Such things done in the heat of the moment mostly leaves us with regrets. So here are a few ways to deal with extreme anger.


	Acknowledge it: the first step in solving a problem is recognizing that you have one. The fundamental problem here is that people believe they are on the right track and refuse to budge from their views. It is essential to realize that this step is not about deciding whether you are right or wrong, but acknowledging the fact that your reaction to the situation can be channeled in a better way. When getting someone to acknowledge their anger problem, be careful as to not use negative words like wrong, false and shouldn't. Instead, influence with positive words like can and should. Instead of saying'you are wrong to react like this, you can say'i understand what you are feeling. Is there a way we can resolve this situation'
	Recognize the signs: once you know that your problems exist, you can try devising ways that will work for you in dealing with the situation. You can count to 10 to calm yourself or simply decide to not speak until you can calm yourself. Knowing that you may enter into an argument in a situation, you can list down the points that you feel strongly about and discuss each of them one by one. Working your way through a finite list gives a better opportunity to reach closure at the end.
	Find ways to let it go: not all arguments end in closure. A lot of unsaid justifications cloud our mind repeatedly leaving us seething from the inside. Research has shown that the neurological anger response lasts less than two seconds. Beyond that it takes a strong will to stay angry. Once you realize how much your anger is consuming your mind, decide to free your mind with meditation and other calming exercises. Tell yourself that some people and issues simply don't deserve your anger, emotion, reaction or time.


If you or someone you know is suffering from anger management issues, consult a doctor today.


How To Control Extreme Anger

Did you know that almost all of your nerves converge in your feet and that your foot is the most sensitive part of the human body? Did you also know that if there are any complications to your body, then the feet can show the symptoms indirectly? Science has time and again proved this and it is high time that you give the adequate care for your feet.

This is nowhere explained better than in ancient Ayurveda, where it emphasises the importance of foot massage and the need to strengthen the nerves. Ayurveda has a long traditional foot massage therapy called as  Padabhyanga  which can be traced back to more than 5000 years. The foot massage with essential oils would improve blood and lymphatic circulation, nourishes the skin, and calms the restless mind.

Foot massaging can relax the muscles of the feet and legs, it can also help in relieving stress and anxiety. Just like how the tree gets their nourishment from their roots, channelling a proper foot massage can rejuvenate the entire mind and body.  Let us look at in detail.

What is Padabhyanga?

The word Padabhyanga comes from the two Sanskrit words  Pada+abhyanga   Pada  means foot and  Abhyanga  means massage. It is one of the most calming and soothing massage therapy and can keep your mind and soul revitalised if done in a proper way. Participating in this massage therapy daily can allow you to release the clogged energies.

3 Types of Padabhyanga Massage:

The massage can be segregated into three different types as detailed below.

Padabhyanga with hand: This type of massage is the fundamental form of massage and is basically done by your hand in the rubbing and stroking of foot. The heat is generated by it and the cardiovascular circulation gets activated. The massage uses sesame seed oil generally and in some cases even herbal infused oil is also used for a better cure.
Padabhyanga with kasa bowl: In this type of massage, a Kasa bowls with oil coating are wormed. Then the bowl s round surfaces are used to massage the foot and sole in a circular motion. The kasa bowls are generally made of copper and tin. Massaging in such a manner can eliminate toxins and it can also release negative energies from your body.
Padabhyanga marma therapy: This type of therapy is very similar to acupuncture, where the pressure points of your feet are activated. These are called as marma points and special care is taken to make sure that these marma points are activated by pressing them over a small period of time. The therapy releases negative energy and relaxes your mind with rejuvenation.

Foot Massage - How It Can Help Relieve Stress?

This post-traumatic stress disorder is a mental health condition, which gets triggered by a terrifying event. It can happen either through experiencing it or by witnessing it. The symptoms include flashbacks of the events, nightmares leading to severe anxiety and thoughts related to the events, which you are unable to control. Going through traumatic events is quite normal and each and every individual goes through phases, where they encounter events filled with trauma and those who have long-lasting effect on their minds. If the symptoms get worse and go on to last for months and sometimes stretch up to years, then that might be of clear indication a person suffering from Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. 

Let us discuss about the symptoms in detail

The symptoms related to the Post-traumatic Stress Disorder might start within a month after coming across a traumatic sequence.
All these symptoms pose major problems in society, work situations and also in relationships. One s ability to go about doing any normal daily task might also get hampered.
Post-traumatic Stress Disorder symptoms are usually grouped into four types. Different symptoms of each type are:
Intrusive Memories: The symptoms are included under intrusive memories are

Utterly disturbing memories of any particular traumatic event on a recurring basis.
Feel as if you are reliving the traumatic sequence
Dreams which might upset or nightmares related to the horrifying incident.
Avoidance: Symptoms related to avoidance include, trying to avoid thinking or talking about a traumatic event and also avoid going to places or interacting with people, who might remind a person of a particular traumatic event.

Thinking pattern might turn negative: Symptoms of negative thinking patterns may include:You start thinking about yourself and the world in general negatively.There is a sense of hopelessness about the future.You start to get aloof from family and friends.

Physical and emotional reactions change: Symptoms of changes in physical and emotional reactions include

You tend to get scared easily
Unable to sleep peacefully
You cannot concentrate on a particular job
Sense of guilt and shame eats you from inside
Causes

Doctors are not really sure why people suffer from Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. Like most of the health problems, this disorder is in all probability caused by a mix of:

Stressful experiences which a person has to go through while bearing any severe trauma.
Mental health risks inherited, if any of the family members suffered from anxiety and depression.
A person s temperament.
Treatment

The treatment for this Post-traumatic Stress Disorder can help people to take control of their lives once again. Psychotherapy is the primary mode of treatment followed for getting rid off this problem. Along with this, medication can also take an active part in the healing process.  A combination of these treatments can help in improving the symptoms by:

Showing the skills on how to address the symptoms
Counselling, through which people would be made to think better about themselves and others.
Different ways to help cope up, in case the symptoms arise in future.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - Know The Detailed Symptoms Of The Problem!

Being affected with bipolar disorder can not only strain any relationship but also disrupt different aspects of family life. The mood swings stemming from bipolar disorder tend to occur spontaneously without any particular reason. The effects too can be detrimental. Below are some of the best ways one can cope with the impact of a bipolar disorder:

Looking for patterns and signs: You should keep a watch for signs that indicate that you may be entering an episode of mania or depression. Along with a shift in the mood, one should look out for any changes in sleep patterns. It is also essential to keep a track of alcohol or drug usage, energy levels, level of concentration and self-confidence. Since stress is considered a major trigger of bipolar disorder, you should try to simplify life by staying away from any triggers of stress. You may also ask your family and friends to share responsibilities in case your job is too stressful.
Keeping an organized and regular schedule: Sticking to a regular and organized routine can help in controlling mood swings and symptoms of bipolar disorder. People with bipolar disorders generally don t deal well with a lot of changes. Regardless of whether one does errands or work irregularly, it is important to sleep and wake up at a particular time. Also, practising healthy sleeping habits and relax before bed by listening to music, reading books and taking a warm bath is recommended. Make sure that you don t watch thrilling television shows, surf the internet, or play video games since these habits can worsen the mood swings.
Getting regular exercise: Studies show that regular physical exercise can go a long way in improving your mood. You can start by taking a slow walk around your neighbourhood and can gradually increase the intensity of your workouts.
Avoiding alcohol and other drugs: Not just alcohol, caffeine is also a strong stimulant which can make you stay wide awake at night and trigger manic episodes. It is also advised to cut back on soda and other sugary drinks, particularly at night. Alcohol, as well as other drugs, can also affect the impact of the medication which, in turn, can trigger mood swings.
Writing down your feelings: Keeping a journal of the day to day life, stressors and other problems that you may have encountered through the day can be of help. With the passage of time, you will be able to identify the patterns that emerge as triggers which in turn can help you prepare yourself and manage the mood swings better.
These small lifestyle changes and coping strategies can aid in dealing with bipolar disorder effectually. Visiting a specialist can help you get an insight into the exact condition and assist in the management of the triggers.

5 Tips On How To Cope With Bipolar Disorder!

Every person is familiar with the remark  Stop fidgeting  but does anybody ever wonder why do humans fidget? Is there any scientific reason for such an action? This article will throw light on the underlying causes for what is known as fidgeting.

Fidgeting and its underlying causes

Scientific research has revealed that fidgeting has many benefits still most people get annoyed when they see another person twitching and tapping. Most people do this seemingly without any control over their movement when they are ordered to be still. Research shows that there is at least one biological reason to back this action.
Since the same brain area is used for movement and speech, it is only natural that gestures are interlinked with thorough preparation for a speech. People tend to move their hands more when they are looking for a word to say, but are not being able to find it. In a recent study, it was found that school children between the age of 6-8 years who use their hands a lot can come up with the right answers during lessons.
While this is one theory, another neurological theory suggests that a portion of the mental load is off-loaded through the process of fidgeting when people have to tackle complex problems or thoughts. The theory is called cognitive load hypothesis. The offloading mechanism frees up the mental faculties thus, devoting them to the mental process. While this may not be a definitive explanation for fidgeting, it does go to show that there is a link between a person s hand movements and their thought and speech process.
Other reasons for fidgeting

Other than the cognitive advantages, some evidence has also been found linking fidgeting with metabolism. People who fidget are found to have a higher metabolism and lower BMI. This difference can be seen between thin and overweight people. Fidgeting amidst lollygagging during the day helps burn up to 350 calories a day. Also, fidgeting among other incidental physical activity helps keep an individual fit.
Among other reasons, fidgeting also serves as a coping mechanism for people with ADD. If a person is engaged in something that he/she is not interested in then the additional sensory-motor input that is even slightly stimulating or entertaining helps the brain to get completely engaged. This helps to maintain focus on the actual activity being performed by the individual.
So, fidgeting helps distract that part of the brain that is getting bored. This helps the other parts of the brain focus better on the actual activity. This is known as floating attention which perhaps is an evolutionary trait that dates back to prehistoric times. In those times, the ability to focus entirely on a task with undivided attention was not favorable to the human since doing so could make them unaware of the enormous ravenous beast hiding behind the bushes.
Thus, though there is some degree of understanding is there when it comes to fidgeting, more research studies are required to gain further insight. Consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

Fidgeting - Why Do We Do It?

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