5 mind reasons you might not be getting an orgasm

Sex is not only a physical need, sex is a great way to emotionally bond and get closer to your partner as well. Any dissatisfaction in the bedroom can affect other aspects of your life, and can lead to fights, squabbles and general unhappiness. The inability to orgasm can become a major bone of contention. There can be various reasons behind the inability to climax. Some of the common ones are detailed below:

1. Lack of stimulation

Studies show that only 25% of women reach climax during sexual intercourse. The remaining 75% of women require more stimulation, like fingers or even toys and tongues to reach orgasm. Amongst this is a subset of 10-15% of women who never reach orgasm. Thus, a large number of women require extra stimulation to achieve climax during sex. You must talk to your partner about putting in some extra effort and providing the extra stimulation you need to achieve climax.

2. Over-thinking

Many men and women over-think their actions in bed. From their expressions to how they are reacting and how they are making their partner feel - everything is under constant scrutiny and revision. This leads to a lot of stress, which can hinder your ability to reach orgasm. You need to relax in the bedroom, because whatever you do will feel good in some way or another. Your anxieties can also distract you from what is going on, which means you don't get the chance to fully experience the pleasures of sex. If it helps, speak to your partner about your anxieties and tell them what you are stressing about during sex.

3. Differences between men and women 

Men are visual creatures. This means that what they see turns them on. A woman's orgasm, on the other hand, happens in her head. Thus, men and women have different roots to their stimulation. Lack of an orgasm might mean either of these needs isn't being fulfilled. A great way to work around this and make sex more fun is to include a lot of foreplay in your love-making session. You can do this by trying out role-playing or using sex toys. Make sure to take it slow for a great build-up to your orgasm.

4. Performance issues

Porn has an impact on your sex life. It can increase your expectations to a considerable extent, which may not be fulfilled, thus hampering your experience in the bedroom. A lot of people become so focused on reproducing that experience that they forget that its real life. The focus on performance overwhelms their actual experience of sex, which results in an inability to reach orgasm. Try to accept the fact that you don't really have to perform for your partner. Your partner appreciates you for what you are, despite everything.

5. Mental blocks

A problem in the relationship, certain health conditions like depression, past trauma and negative social conditioning can all have negative impacts on your ability to orgasm. Talk to your partner about past trauma if you have any, and what your triggers are. Consider speaking to a sex therapist as mental health issues should never be neglected. Depression hits the libido hard, and the problem is only compounded by antidepressants. Negative social conditioning can only be helped by therapy, so try to reach out to a mental health professional.

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Related Tip: Why You Must Try Kegel Exercises for a Happier Sex Life

5 Mind Reasons You Might Not Be Getting an Orgasm

5 Common Causes Of Male Infertility

Till some time ago, male fertility wasn't paid much attention to, in our country. But, with changing times and increasing awareness, much is being discussed about male fertility. For couples trying to go family way, it is important to know how male fertility works. For a woman to get pregnant (assuming everything is fine within her body), the following things must occur in the male partner’s body: 
a. Healthy sperms
b. Sperm must get carried in delicate tubes to mix with the semen right before ejaculation.
c. Good sperm count
d. Movement and function of the sperm should be normal.
If any of the above are not happening as should be, it could indicate male infertility. Some of the reasons for male infertility could be:
1) Infections - Infections can interfere with the sperm health of an individual.
2) Varicocele - This happens when the veins which drain the testicles develop a swelling in them. This leads to reduced sperm count and fewer moving sperm. This can be treated and it is possible to improve the result with the help of assisted reproductive techniques like vitro fertilization.
3) Inflamed Testicles - Certain infections are known to interfere with the sperm health and production. These infections include STDs, prostatitis and inflamed testicles due to mumps. Few infections can lead to permanent testicular damage.
4) Inherited Disorder - Infertility can result from inherited disorders like Klinefelter’s syndrome where instead of being born with one X and one Y chromosomes, some males are born with two X and one Y chromosomes. Disorders in the testicles can also be the cause of male infertility.
5) Sexual Issues - Erectile Dysfunction pain during intercourse, premature ejaculation and such can also be the reasons for male infertility.
It is best to consult a doctor to understand the exact cause behind your problem.



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5 Common Causes Of Male Infertility

How much sex should you really have?

Sex is an extremely personal and subjective matter. Different individuals relate to and indulge in sex differently. The idea of sex also varies from person to person and may not always fit the stereotypical penile-vaginal penetrative intercourse.

There is no way of determining exactly how much sex is good and how much of it is too much. Some people like to be sexually active with thorough regularity while others find comfort in abstinence. Age also plays an important role here with people between the ages of 18-29 indulging in higher levels of sexual activity than those who are middle-aged or elderly.

The different levels and frequencies of sexual activity have varying degrees of impacts on the overall mental, physical and sexual health of a person. There are numerous health benefits attached to having an active sex life, which manifests themselves in both the body and the mind.

The health benefits of having sex are - 
As per studies conducted, it has been shown that having sex, at least, two times a week can boost overall physical and mental health. The many health benefits of being sexually active are as follows:
   It improves immunity and makes the body more resilient to diseases
   It improves bladder control in women and prevents urinary incontinence
   It prevents erectile dysfunction in men
   It improves blood circulation and lowers blood pressure
   It acts as a stress reliever
   It improves functioning of the heart and lowers the risk of heart disease
   It reduces sensitivity to pain
There are several other benefits of sex, which include the effective healing and nurturing of the body in a holistic manner.

Is there a limit to having sex?
A large number of people all around the world are concerned about their carnal compulsions and frequently approach sex therapists about what frequency of sex constitutes as a 'healthy' dose.

There really is no such thing as too much sex. But if overindulgence in sexual activities causes a disturbance in everyday activities such as work, classes, household responsibilities and other obligations, it becomes a problem. If such a situation arises, it might be signs of a sex addiction in which case it is important to consult a sexologist or sex therapist. Ideally, having sex two times a day is good for your body, mind and soul.



How much sex should you really have?

Habits causing reduction in sperm count

There are a few very common things that a man consumes or does every day without even realizing, that they have a tendency to reduce his fertility. These causes start from drinking and could end with something as harmless as caffeine. Let’s see which habits can cause reduction in sperm count thereby reducing fertility of a man.

1. Eating processed meat harms sperm quality.
2. Excessive usage of laptop can also lead to reduction in sperm count because of the heat that a laptop releases.
3. Hormonal imbalance also causes low sperm production.
4. If a man is underweight or overweight, this could also lead to less production of sperm. So, a man should watch his weight before thinking of extending his family.
5. Exposure to too much heat for a prolonged time leads to reduction in sperm count.
6. Regular smoking also leads to reduction in sperm count.
7.Excessive stress also causes reduction in sperm count.
8. Regular and continuous exposure to chemicals like xylene, painting material and metal like lead also leads to low sperm count.
9. Chemicals present in sunscreen lotion can harm a man’s sperm count so one should be alert while using a sunscreen lotion.
10. Sex toys also cause infertility in men because of presence of phthalates in   them.
11. Regular intake of canned food can also contribute in low sperm count.
12. Regular drinking habits reduce testosterone levels thereby reducing the quality and production of sperm.
13. Excessive intake of canned food leads to intake of bisphenol A which lowers down the quality of the sperm.
14. Excess intake of caffeine also leads to reduction in sperm count.
15. Lack of exercise and laziness also reduces sperm count to a great extent.

Some of the above-mentioned things can be unavoidable, but point here is that taking everything in moderate quantity doesn’t do any harm but problem occurs when the intake is excessive, regular and beyond limit. So, it’s better to reduce the quantity and regular use of such things than letting it affect your sperm count.




Did You Know These 15 Habits Are Reducing Your Sperm Count?

For a healthy relation it is important that we learn to communicate our feelings with our partners. Foreplay not only plays an essential role in sexual arousal prior to the act of sexual intercourse, but it also has a number of health benefits for both men and women, which are both physical and emotional in nature. It also works towards increasing intimacy between couples and often leads to a higher level of sexual satisfaction, again for both sexes. 

Here are some foreplay moves you can use to make your time in the bedroom more satisfactory.

1. Engage in conversation: Communicating with your partner is often a great way to get things started. Talking dirty not only increases intimacy between the couple, but also makes it more fun for both, thus reducing stress level, it often reduces the performance anxiety disorder, especially in men.

2. Take it slow: Taking your time during foreplay, with prolonged periods of kissing and sexual stimulation, can exponentially increase levels of arousal for both sexes, and thus add to the chances of reaching orgasm in the ensuing act of intercourse. Many women have also reported that climaxing during foreplay itself increases the probability of achieving multiple orgasms, due to release of a high number of endorphins, thus inducing feelings of euphoria.

3. Try to provide equal attention to all erogenous zones: Spending time in stimulation of each and every erogenous zone of the body such as the neck, breasts and clitoris (for women), penis and scrotum (for men), etc., can often prove to be very useful in sexually arousing your partner and increasing chances of achieving an orgasm.

4. Erotic massages work great: Deep and sensuous massages, especially of erogenous zones, coupled with small breaks to kiss your partner can lead to high levels of arousal due to the friction between your hands and their skin, which aids the release of several arousal hormones, and works great to maximize pleasure.  

5. Engage in oral sex: Though many may be averse to the idea of engaging in oral sex, it has been found that it has a number of health benefits. It not only acts as a stress buster but also helps regulate blood pressure levels, increases chances of conception, relieves pain, and even reduces chances of prostate cancer in men.

5 Foreplay Moves To Get It All Started

Intercourse is meant to be a pleasurable and intimate experience. But it might become an unpleasant act if you are suffering from performance anxiety. When you are mentally occupied by questions such as "Do I look too fat?" or "Did I do that right?", sex stops being a gratifying experience.

Incessant anxiety over your ability or appearance can result in sex becoming nerve-wracking and stressful for you. It might even have you avoiding sex altogether. This psychological condition is termed as sexual performance anxiety.

Sex isn't only a physical reaction, there are emotions tied to it as well. If you are too stressed out and your mind is preoccupied, your body reflects your inner turmoil and you cannot get aroused.

Causes
The causes of sexual performance anxiety include:
1. Fear that you wouldn't be able to satisfy your partner and perform well sexually
2. Body image issues (Such as stressing about your weight)
3. Problems in your relationship
4. Men worry that their penis don't 'measure' up
5. Men might be concerned about taking too much time to orgasm, or about premature ejaculation
6. Women worry about not enjoying the experience or being unable to have an orgasm

Symptoms
Your mental state has a deep impact on your physical state. The effect of stress hormones norepinephrine and epinephrine can hinder your sexual performance. Symptoms of sexual performance anxiety include:

1. In men, blood vessels constrict due to the effect of stress hormones. This leads to reduced blood flow to the penis, thus making it difficult for the man to get an erection.

2. Often though it is less diagnosed in women, sexual performance anxiety leads to trouble in lubrication during sex. Lack of lubrication dims the desire to have sex.

Sexual performance anxiety is a vicious, inescapable cycle. Increased anxiety hampers you from having sex, making you think you won't be able to perform well, which causes even more anxiety.

Treatment
Consult a doctor you will be comfortable with discussing your problems. Sexual performance can be either treated by medication (if you have an underlying medical condition such as erectile dysfunction) or through therapy.

Talking to a therapist or counsellor about your problems can help you in several ways. You can learn to become more comfortable with yourself and your body. You can also understand your problems better, which can eliminate your anxiety.

All About Sexual Performance Anxiety

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