A couple of decades ago, medical professionals believed that a lot of females could not climax at all. There are a number of reasons for this. It is easy for the male to know when he has achieved an orgasm, which usually happens with ejaculation, which is quite evident. For the females, on the other hand, it is not so evident. It is a perceived feeling and while the media showcase it in a particular way, reality is far moved from it.
There are various reasons why it is very difficult to pin this down. Orgasms are not just an elusive feeling for the woman, it is an elusive topic for the medical professionals too. Read on to know some of the common causes (more beliefs or notions) about this and some simple but effective ways of managing this.
- Private topic: Girls are very shy compared to boys and both their exposure to sex education and discussion about this is limited compared to boys. We might tend to think of it as common in India alone, but this is true across a vast number of countries. We are not alone! This shyness continues into their later years too, and unless transformed by the partner, it may continue to be a topic that is shunned.
- Purpose: Sex is more deemed as a form of procreation rather than for sex. Therefore, while sex is necessary for conception, orgasm is not. This is one more reason (strange but true) that orgasm is very elusive for a woman.
- Psychological factors: It could be guilt from past relationships or fear of past abuse. It could be fear of losing control or fear of coming across as vulnerable. For any of these reasons, women can have difficulties climaxing during the act.
In men, the causes are more defined and physical in nature and include erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, retrograde ejaculation, and delayed ejaculation.
Whatever the cause of the problem, the first step in coping up with the issue is to acknowledge the issue. Being a private topic, this is not something that is going to draw the person towards medical help. However, this needs to be discussed frankly with the partner or with the doctor. Getting the partner involved removes a lot of psychological barriers (guilt, fear, anxiety, etc.) This would result in natural ironing out of issues, improving the performance of both the people involved.
If that does not happen, seeking professional help, be it medical help to correct physical issues or counselling, is the next suggestion. A frank discussion will do wonders, and what was once elusive can be well within your reach.

The Elusive Orgasm - Causes and Coping!

Sexual intercourse for humans is not only a reproductive act, but is also considered to be an emotional and pleasurable act. However, statistics report that almost 30% of the women experience pain during intercourse also known as vaginismus. This not only hampers the pleasure, but is also an unhealthy sign since it is indicative of a problem.

Vaginismus / Painful intercourse could be a regular occurrence, or a sporadic one. There could be numerous reasons that cause the discomfort and pain. Though it might be an early manifestation of grave diseases such as endometriosis or fibroids, but more often, it is triggered due to conditions such as vaginal dryness, yeast infection, bacterial vaginiosis, which can be easily treated. It is pertinent to understand that it is not the physical infirmity of the entire female anatomy that causes such pain/ discomfort, but the existence of certain conditions that can be treated by a medical practitioner. 

Certain such causal factors associated with painful intercourse and the efficient ways to deal with them are discussed below:

Vaginal dryness- Vaginal dryness is one of the most commonly cited causes for painful intercourse. There are various causal factors of vaginal dryness. These include, but are not limited to, consumption of certain drugs, bathing with hot water, health conditions or even lack of foreplay. Vaginal dryness due to the aforementioned causes is a short-lived condition that can be treated well with the help of a medical practitioner. Usage of lubricants that is suitable for you, as advised by a medical practitioner, could go a long way in aiding the ease of sexual intercourse. The lubricants act as an effective substitute, if the body is unable to naturally secrete vaginal fluids to ease intercourse, thereby greatly reducing the pain that is experienced.

Improper vaginal expansion- The female anatomy is designed in such a way that it expands normally during intercourse. Proper foreplay enables the woman to get excited, which results in the release of vaginal fluids that aids in sexual intercourse. However, in the event that the female is not excited enough prior to the act, sexual intercourse can become a painful act, since the vagina is unable to expand in the absence of vaginal fluids. In such cases, take things slow and give your body time to comfortably go with the flow.

Vaginal itching caused by infection- Vaginal infections can be caused by antibiotics, prior sexual activity that has resulted in contraction of Sexually Transmitted Diseases etc. This results in an itching or burning sensation while having sex. It is essential to rest your body instead of forcing things, and to consult your doctor as soon as possible. The doctor can correctly diagnose the causal factors behind the infection, and prescribe the necessary medicines for it.

Emotional issues including fear of sex, marital issues/ disputes, etc are also leading cause of painful sex

Treatment:

However, symptoms vary from the common ones mentioned above, it is always advisable to consult a experienced doctor including a gynecologist, sexologist or sexual counselor.

Role of sexual counselor is very important, as he she can offer Sex therapy in the form of counseling, brief psychoanalysis, or behavioural therapy .This can help to address any underlying psychological issues, such as fear or anxiety, tackle any irrational beliefs that you have about sex, educate you about sex.

Also some special techniques can be taught eventually stop your vagina closing involuntarily, such as using vaginal trainers and pelvic floor exercises

If you wish to discuss about this problem, you can consult a doctor and ask a question.

Vaginismus - Make Sex Less Painful For Your Lady!

With changing times the nature and effects of virus and bacteria are also changing and due to this, one of the biggest risks of unprotected sex is catching a sexually transmitted disease or STD. An STD can be contacted by any form of intercourse including oral, vaginal and anal sex. STDs are serious diseases that should not be ignored and require treatment and medication. Some common STDs are:
1. Chlamydia
2. Hepatitis B
3. Genital Herpes
4. Syphilis and
5. Gonorrhea 

The only way to protect yourself from an STD is to abstain from unprotected sex and always use a condom. Sometimes STD infections have no symptoms and can remain dormant for years, hence it is essential to get yourself regularly treated for STDs if you have more than one sexual partner. On the other hand some STDs have visible symptoms such as:

Skin rash
A rash in the genital area is most often a sign of STDs. This can be in the form of bumps, sores or warts. It may or may not be accompanied by itchiness. A rash caused by a STD usually results in redness and inflammation. Herpes sores may subside within a week or so but just because the rash is gone does not mean the infection has been treated. Hence even if the rash disappears before your doctor's visit, ensure you mention it. 

Painful urination
A burning sensation or pain while urinating is a symptom for a number of STDs. There may also be a change in the colour of urine. Some STDs associated with painful urination as Chlamydia, gonorrhea and trichomoniasis. However, this may also be triggered by kidney stones or a urinary tract infection. 

Painful intercourse
Pain during intercourse is one of the most overlooked symptoms of a sexually transmitted disease. While a little pain may be normal, any sudden increase in pain or new type of pain should not be ignored. This should be kept in mind especially when having intercourse with a new partner or if there is a change in sexual habits. When it comes to men's sexual health, pain at the time of ejaculation can be a symptom of a STD.

Abnormal discharge
Abnormal discharge from the vagina or penis can be a symptom of a number of infections not all of which are STDs. Strangely coloured and odorous vaginal discharge can be a symptom of yeast infections or a Sexually transmitted disease like trichomoniasis or gonorrhea. Bleeding in between periods can also be a symptom of a STD.  Abnormal discharge from the penis can be a sign of Chlamydia, gonorrhea or trichomoniasis.

Learn the Signs and Symptoms of STDs

Infections of the vagina, cervix and uterus

Vaginal problems are very common and a little awareness can enable women to take care of this delicate region of their body. Vaginal infections are the most irritable and hurtful and lack of education on the same makes it difficult to prevent them; from burning and itching to unpleasant odour, most women have faced these infections at some point of their lives.

Here are few points you must know about to stay clear of these infections.

1. Vaginal infections: vagina contains bacteria and yeast which are good and maintain the health of the area. However, things like change in levels of hormones, poor hygiene, pregnancy, sexual contact, antibiotics, disturb the balance of health, thus causing infections. Most common types of vaginal infections are: bacterial infections, yeast infections, trichomonas vaginitis. While there exist over-the-counter cure for these infections, it is best to visit your gynecologist and get the infections diagnosed &amp; treated.

2. Cervix inflammation: infection or inflammation in the cervix is called cervicitis. It is pretty common and is influenced by a number of factors like allergies, infections or irritations - it is important to know the cause of cervicitis because in the long run, it could pose a problem with fertility. Symptoms of cervicitis include foul smelling vaginal discharge, pain during passing urine, pelvic pain, abnormal bleeding like bleeding after sexual contact or between periods. Cervicitis is treated with the help of anti-fungal medications, antibiotics and anti-viral medications depending upon the evaluation of the underlying cause.

3. Pelvic and uterine infection: infection in the uterus and pelvis is also a matter which should not be left untreated. It can present with pain lower abdomen, pain during intercourse, frequent and painful urination. The infection can be caused by various organisms which can lead to pelvic inflammatory disease which in turn can spread to the uterus, ovaries and the fallopian tubes.

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Infections Of The Vagina, Cervix and Uterus: Facts You Must Know.

Genital herpes is a sexually transmitted disease. One out of every six people in the United States suffers from this disease. It is more common than you think. Like any other STD, it is extremely important to take proper protection (use a condom) while engaging in sexual activities.

Genital Herpes is caused by the herpes simplex virus (HSV). There are two types of herpes simplex virus.

HSV-1 is most commonly associated with blisters and ulcers around the mouth known as cold sores.
HSV-2 is associated with blistering lesions in genital areas that are exposed during sexual contact.
However, both types of herpes simplex virus can infect the mouth or the genital areas, meaning that genital contact with a cold sore on the mouth can lead to genital herpes. Likewise, kissing someone with a cold sore can spread the herpes simplex virus infection.

After the initial outbreak of herpes, the virus travels through the nerves and resides in nerve tissue within the body.

Most people with genital herpes don t know they have it. That s because in most people it produces either no symptoms or very mild ones.

Symptoms of Genital Herpes:

The area around your genitalia becomes red and cracked without any pain or itching.
Itching around your anal region
Blisters around your genitalia can cause immense pains when they break open.
Pain in the open sores while urination.
Headaches and backaches.
Flu and swollen lymph nodes are very common.
Fatigue is also felt if you suffer from genital herpes.
Symptoms like these can be mistaken for other infections such as vaginal yeast infections, bacterial infections and bladder infections. So, if you are suffering from such symptoms it is advisable to go in for a health check up followed by a physical exam and a blood test to confirm whether you have genital herpes or not.

How can it get spread?

You can only get Genital Herpes from vaginal intercourse and not anal or oral intercourse. The fluid present in the sore of a genital herpes patient has infected fluid. If the fluid comes in contact with their partner s sexual organs while having intercourse they can be easily infected.

Can Symptoms Be Treated?

There is no cure for genital herpes. But the symptoms can be lessened and prevented with treatment. Treatment can also reduce the risk of infecting others.

Your healthcare provider may prescribe antiviral medications to help prevent or reduce the pain and discomfort from an outbreak of symptoms. Medication taken on a daily basis to suppress the virus can reduce the number of outbreaks and reduce the risk of infecting others

How to Avoid Getting Genital Herpes:

Try to have sex with people who have been tested negative for herpes or any other STDs.
Use a latex condom while having sex. It prevents any sort of liquid to pass inside your partner s genitalia.

Genital Herpes - A Sexually Transmitted Disease!

One of the most common queries faced by doctors dealing with pregnancies are risks associated with having sexduring the gestation and post-partum periods. Such doubts arise from both genuine concern and also from several superstitions and myths.

As a matter of fact, having sex during pregnancy is perfectly normal and safe. However, keeping in mind the changes the woman is going through, there are a few specific do's and don'ts you need to follow while having sexduring pregnancy.

Do's
1. Be aware: Pay attention to the doctor's evaluation of the expecting mother's condition. Many pregnancy risks can be predicted at an early stage. Abstain in case of predictions pointing to a risky gestation period and/ or delivery. Get yourself tested regularly, so that there is no possibility of transmitting infections to the expecting mother.

2. Enjoy foreplay: Pregnancy normally results in increased sensation in the erotogenic zones. Foreplay is a great way to relieve a woman's tension and she will enjoy your touch more than ever.

3. Pay attention to your partner's needs and reactions: Women have to go through a lot during pregnancy like fatigue all the time, along with sudden nausea and extreme mood swings. So, paying more attention to your partner's needs and reactions will help make the act more enjoyable for both of you.

Don'ts
1. Don't go for multiple partners: Multiple partners increase the risk of infections. It is not advisable to have sex with multiple partners during this time.

2. Don't Use sex toys: Use of sex toys during pregnancy is discouraged as it increases the risk of infections.

3. Don't Try risky positions and maneuvers: Please keep your desires for exotic positions in check. Risque behavior can lead to injuries.

4. Don't Keep yourself ahead of her: It is perfect idiocy to keep your desires ahead of the needs and desires of the love of your life. By putting yourself ahead of her you will not only negatively affect her mental health, but her physical health as well.

5 Do not mix drugs with intimacy: Use of intoxicants during her pregnancy to enhance your senses will put the healthy growth and delivery of the child in jeopardy. A number of birth defects in children are the result of using intoxicating substance use during pregnancy.

Dos and Don'ts of Sex During Pregnancy

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