No matter which kind of relationship couple are in, they always have some issues and look to be happier, and more connected, though the issues can be different for different couples -  money, sex, infidelity, in-laws, children etc. Despite this, any relationship is completely subjective and no clear cut rules can be executed on it. Yet, following certain guidelines may help proceed happily in a relationship.

1.Love yourself

You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy. Accepting yourself fully as you are and showing yourself this same unconditional love will provide protection, healing, and confidence to work on your shortfalls.

2.Adopt a positive lifestyle

There are many different ways in which you can embrace a more positive lifestyle - practice affirmations, express gratitude, meditation, exercise. Just find something that helps you unwind and enjoy life. And most importantly - keep doing these things.

3.Empathize with your partner

The ability to empathize is what inhibits us from just going through life doing whatever we want, without regard for others. It is what makes a compromise in a relationship possible. If you realize that something you've done has hurt another person and you can empathize with his/her pain or unhappiness, you will hesitate to do that again.

4. Take responsibility: Don't try to figure out who's right

When couples come for therapy, one or both tend to think that the primary problem is their partner. Both people co-create the climate of the relationship. And both need to do some things differently to create the marriage or relationship they both really want. If your intention is to create a more positive world for yourself and those around you, it's up to you to have the thoughts, moods, and actions that will create that world.

5. Stay connected

When there is distress in the marriage or relationship, one or both usually feel some emotional disconnection. Frequently, sexual passion diminishes as well. (However, sometimes one partner will try to increase frequency of sex in an effort to feel connected).  And often, people will busy themselves with work or kids instead, or do other things to either try to feel connected or to avoid being alone with the person with whom they feel the pain of disconnection.

6. Express thoughts, feelings, and wishes 

Resentment can build when couples sweep things under the rug, so be vulnerable and don't bury negative feelings, but try to express them in a respectful way. Opening up to your partner can make you feel vulnerable and exposed, but it is the most important part of an intimate relationship.

7. Try new things together

Boredom can be a major obstacle to lasting romantic or companionate love. Psychological research has suggested that couples who experience the most intense love are the ones who enjoy participating in new or challenging 'self-expanding' activities together.

8. Preserve your independence

Neediness and caretaking in long-term partnerships -- which can easily result from looking to the partnership for safety, security and stability -- damper the erotic spark. But if couples can maintain independence and witness each other participating in individual activities at which they're skilled, they can continue to see their partner in an ever-new light.

8 Guidelines for a Happy Relationship

Most Practical Tips for Controlling Everyday Stress

We generally use the word 'stress' when we feel that everything becomes too much to handle - we are overloaded and wonder whether we can cope with the pressures placed upon us. Nowadays stress is a normal part of life. Almost everyone has some sort of stress. Constantly reacting to stressful situations without making adjustments to counter the effects, threatens our health and well-being.

There are steps you can help you managing day to day stressful conditions and take to feel better.

Be realistic: If you feel overwhelmed by some activities (yours and/or your family's), learn to say NO! Eliminate an activity that is not absolutely necessary. You may be taking on more responsibility than you can or should handle. If you meet resistance, give reasons why you're making the changes. Be willing to listen to other's suggestions and be ready to compromise.

Shed the 'superman/superwoman' urge: No one is perfect, so don't expect perfection from yourself or others. Ask yourself, 'What really needs to be done?' How much can I do? Is the deadline realistic? What adjustments can I make?' Don't hesitate to ask for help if you need it.

Take one thing at a time: For people under tension or stress, their day-to-day workload can sometimes seem unbearable. The best way to cope with this feeling of being overwhelmed is to take one task at a time. Make a list of things you need to get done and start with one task. Once you accomplish that task, choose the next one. The positive feeling of 'checking off' tasks is very satisfying. It will motivate you to keep going.

Share your feelings: A conversation with a friend lets you know that you are not the only one having a bad day. Stay in touch with friends and family. Ask them how they have dealt with a similar situation that may be 'stressing you out.' Let them provide love, support and guidance. Don't try to cope alone.

Be flexible: If you find you're meeting constant opposition in either your personal or professional life, rethink your position or strategy. Arguing only intensifies stressful feelings. Make allowances for other's opinions and be prepared to compromise. If you are willing to be accommodating, others may meet you halfway. Not only will you reduce your stress, you may find better solutions to your problems. Go easy with criticism. You may expect too much of yourself and others. Try not to feel frustrated, disappointed or even 'trapped' when another person criticises you.

Hobbies: Take a break from your worries by doing something you enjoy. Whether it's gardening or painting, schedule time to indulge your interest. Exercise: Regular exercise is a popular way to relieve stress. Twenty to thirty minutes of physical activity benefits both the body and the mind. Meditate: Just ten to twenty minutes of quiet reflection may bring relief from chronic stress as well as increase your tolerance to it.

Take Herbal Supplement: Herbs like Brahmi, Ashwagandha, Mandukparni, Shankhpuspi, Kaunch are very helpful in managing stress. These herbs work on the brain and help relax you which ultimately empowers you to manage your stressful conditions easily. There are many herbal supplements available in the market that can help you.

Consult the Doctor: If your stress level doesn't seem to improve with above tips, it may require more attention and consultation with an Expert.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'Consult'.

Most Practical Ways of Controlling Everyday STRESS

Smoking can affect your health in all respects, and it is no different when it comes to your heart. Smokers are almost twice as likely to have heart problems compared to individuals who do not smoke.

How does smoking cast an impact on your cardiac health?
Smoking increases the risk of developing various kinds of cardiovascular issues such as stroke and coronary heart disease. It damages the lining of the arteries which, in turn, paves the way for building up of fatty substances called atheroma which narrows down the artery. This may lead to heart attack, stroke, and angina.

Tobacco contains carbon monoxide which reduces the amount of oxygen in the blood. This indicates that the heart has to work harder for supplying the required amount of oxygen. Cigarettes also contain nicotine which stimulates the production of adrenaline. This instigates the heart to beat at a faster pace and raises the blood pressure.

The chemicals present in the smoke of tobacco can harm your blood cells and retard the normal functioning of the heart. When not inhibited, it can lead to atherosclerosis. Atherosclerosis is an ailment in which a waxy material, termed as plaque builds up in the arteries and limits the flow of blood to different parts of the body.

When plaque builds up for a long span of time, it causes coronary heart disease, and you are likely to experience symptoms such as heart failure, chest pain, heart attack, arrhythmia and heart failure and even death.

Smoking is a major risk factor for another fatal ailment called the peripheral artery disease or PAD. PAD is a clinical condition where the accumulation of plaque in the arteries inhibits carriage of oxygen-rich blood to the head, different organs, and limbs.

With regular smoking, the blood is more susceptible to clotting which surges the risk of having a stroke or heart attack.

Is there any effect of second-hand smoking?
Second-hand smoking, also referred to as passive smoking means inhaling the smoke ejected while smoking. When a person is regularly exposed to smoke, he or she is likely to have low levels of good cholesterol, damaged heart tissues, and high blood pressure. Various researchers are of the opinion that second-hand smoke of tobacco is a viable cause of heart ailments in nonsmokers. This means, if you are a smoker, you are definite to harm the members of your surroundings.

Why should you quit smoking?
One of the best ways to decrease the risk of having cardiac ailments is to stop smoking. In case you have never smoked, you should never think of starting it for the same reason. You should also try to avoid second-hand smoke by avoiding going to a smoking zone. It would be a great idea to avoid the company of smokers for the periods when they are smoking.
Stay away from smoking for your heart health.

Can Smoking Affect Your Heart?

Being a perfectionist is not wrong until it does not stop you from working according to your priorities. However, when you struggle to go on with your regular routine and seem to concentrate on one particular thing, again and again, it is time you seek expert advice.

Obsessive-compulsive disorder or OCD is a medical term that refers to obsessions or excessive thoughts leading to compulsions of repetitive behaviours. A person suffering from OCD usually has recurring thoughts that he or she has no control over, which leads to developing uncountable urge of repeating behaviours over and over.

The condition is long-lasting and chronic, and when not attended to as early as possible, usually brings in difficulties to the patient in leading a normal life. Continue reading to know about its symptoms and how it can be diagnosed.

Symptoms
The symptoms of OCD can be divided into two types, symptoms of obsession and the other is symptoms of compulsion.

Obsession Symptoms:

Spending more than normal time on one s obsessions, which results in disrupting one s social, professional, and personal activities.
Having the same images, urges, and thoughts again and again which the patient has no control over.
Losing the control over his/her anxiety and anger and acting on the urge of harming others or one s self.
Having unwanted and inappropriate sexual thoughts, especially developing obsessions with incest and homosexuality.
Being extremely obsessive and concerned about the fear of contamination that includes threats from the germs, dirt and even body fluid.
Compulsion Symptoms:

Constant cleaning and washing, especially washing one's own hands again and again.
In cases of mental compulsions, tendency to repetitively review events mentally, repetitive praying for harm prevention, etc.
Repetitively checking of the body parts or things around to be sure that nothing has happened to them.
Repeating routines such as reading the same page over and over.
Diagnosis
Diagnosis of obsessive-compulsive behaviour may consist one or various medical examinations that include,

Physical examination: Physical examination is performed in order to eliminate the probability of the presence of any other complications or illnesses.
Psychological evaluation: Psychological evaluation is all about discussing the feelings, thoughts, symptoms, and behaviour of the patients.
Laboratory-based tests: Usually, a complete blood count or CDC is included in the lab tests where the presence of drug or alcohol and the function of the thyroid is analysed.
Reference to the OCD diagnostic criteria: This step includes referring to the standard OCD diagnostic criteria to determine whether the patient is suffering from OCD or not.
Affecting people of all ages, OCD traps its victims in a cycle of compulsions and obsessions. Though a complete cure to this illness has not yet been discovered, still, with right treatment at the right time can be very effective in controlling of the symptoms while helping the patient to lead a normal life.

Depending upon the condition of the patient, the severity, and type of OCD, a psychiatrist can offer the best treatment in the form of therapies or talk sessions, or medications or a combination of both.

A Brief Overview Of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Its Symptoms, And Diagnosis!

Are you aware of behavioral and emotional disorders in children? During the developmental years of a child, constant growth and change are signified. This fact should be strictly kept in mind while dealing with behavioral and emotional disorders in children. Brain disorders like bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety disorders may affect any child during early childhood. The assistance of a mental health professional should be taken while dealing with these problems. On a global scale, almost 15% of children suffer from behavioral disorders. Among the different forms of behavioral disorders, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) accounts for being one of the most common ones.

Here is a list of the different forms of behavioral and emotional disorders, which are observed in children:

ADHD- This common mental disorder in children is more common in boys than in girls. Commonly, children affected with this disorder are unable to finish familiar tasks, plan or sit still. They may even lose awareness about what goes around them. ADHD-affected children may seem fine on some days, but on other days, they may experience disorganized and frenzied activities. This disorder may continue into adolescence and adulthood as well. There are several treatment options for ADHD, which may include medications, therapy and educational options.

Autism- Children affected with autism seem to become indifferent, remote and isolated in a world of their own. They are unable to form emotional ties with other people or their peers. Autism is more likely to occur in boys than in girls. The condition may result in language delays, mental retardation, and in some cases, a child may suffer high functioning and usual speech and intelligence. This is because the brain of such children functions differently than others. Consistency is very important for managing autism in children.

Bipolar Disorder- This disorder is most likely to begin in early childhood and it continues into adulthood. It is featured by extreme mood swings in the patient. A child may have extremely high or euphoric feelings, but his mood may turn into depression and sadness all of a sudden. This condition is a genetic illness, and it is often mistaken or misdiagnosed as ADHD.

Anxiety- Anxiety disorders make children feel uneasy, distressed and unusually scared for no appropriate reason. Panic disorders, featured, by intense episodes of fear, which occur without any kind of provocation or signal are a common type of anxiety disorder. OCD or obsessive compulsive disorder, which is repetitive and compulsive in nature, is another type of anxiety disorder.

It is very important to treat and deal with children s behavioral and emotional disorders at an early stage. Early diagnosis enables an early start of treatment, which prevents further degradation of the condition.

Types Of Behavioral And Emotional Disorders In Children

With age, most body organs begin to deteriorate in their function. This happens to the brain also, thereby reducing the overall speed of functioning of most organs. While slowing of bodily movement is visible, the internal organs functioning also slows down, which is not that obvious. Memory loss or dementia is one of the main manifestations of this degeneration of the brain.

Alzheimer s is the most common form of dementia, and the associated symptoms includes reduced reasoning abilities and cognitive defects. Though it is seen only in the elderly, not all elderly people will have Alzheimer s. The overall quality of life of the affected person is reduced with difficulty remembering things that were recently learned. It is a progressive disease and as it gets more severe, a full-time caretaker may be required.

Causes: The brain cells are affected by protein masses known as plaques and tangles. These hamper the way communication between the brain cells happens as well as affect nutrition from reaching all parts of the brain. This leads to shrinking of the brain, eventually leading to memory loss and other problems. There is also a strong genetic linkage, as most people with Alzheimer s have the lipoprotein A gene.

Symptoms: Though memory loss is the most common symptom, there are other symptoms:

Being confused about places, people, and times
Inability to find the right words during conversations
Regular objects are misplaced
Becoming irritable, (in someone who was not so previously)
Mood swings
Personality changes
Inability to organise thoughts
Not able to make the right decisions
Repetitive talks and actions
Forgetfulness (not something the person always does)
Difficulty with numbers (again, not something calculations
Difficulty managing everyday tasks and minor problems
Suspicion of others (like immediate family members and friends)
Risk factors: While age is definitely a risk factor, the fact that not all aged people develop Alzheimer s is to be borne in mind. Other risk factors include the history of stroke, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes, smoking, obesity, and poor lifestyle choices.

Diagnosis: While there is no definitive way to diagnose Alzheimer s, symptoms along with brain scans and neuropsychological function testing are useful ways to confirm the diagnosis.

Treatment: This is aimed at two things reducing the rate of disease progression and treat (or reverse) symptoms if possible.

Cholinesterase inhibitors improve cellular communication in the brain and also manage depression and agitation. Memantine is used to slow the pace of disease progression.
In people with the disease, small changes are useful to help them with the symptoms. These include keeping essential things like keys and wallet in the same place, keep a daily diary to help them remember things, keep pictures of friends and family within visible distance.

Alzheimer's - An Overview!

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