
7 CHARACTERISTICS OF EMOTIONALLY STRONG PEOPLE

Emotionally strong people are better able to manage the stresses and distresses of daily life, and recover more quickly from challenges and crises when they arise. Is your emotional engine strong enough to take you through the ups and downs of life? Are you riding a bullock cart which can topple over anytime you pass through a broken road or are you driving a four wheel, all terrain vehicle, which will ensure you a safe trip through all the rocky terrains of your life?

A common cultural belief is that people who don’t cry and are unemotional, detached are the emotionally strong ones...and the ones who cry easily and exhibit emotional turmoil are the weaker ones. Well, this is just a myth and not an accurate indicator of one’s mental and emotional strength. A person’s internal coping mechanism will determine how strong he/she is emotionally and deal with challenges and bounce back from them. For eg. Two investors invest in a startup company and watch it fail after 5 years of hard work...one cries copious tears and falls apart, the other controls his emotions but feels defeated. Both were not emotionally strong as they couldn’t sustain the pressure and crumbled. It would have been fine if they felt sad and worried over the loss of time, resources and money and then bounced back with fresh ideas and renewed energy, which would have shown their capability to bounce back from difficult situations.

Unfortunately, too many of us judge ourselves incorrectly in exactly such moments. If we react emotionally or tearfully to emotionally challenging situations we scold ourselves for being weak, even when we have every intention of persisting and moving forward and even when we believe we will eventually succeed. Tears are usually a sign of frustration and disappointment, not defeat. What you believe about your future chances of success and how discouraged you feel in the long term is far more important than how often you cry in response to stresses and bad news.

The following list will help you decide how emotionally strong you are and where you need to work on yourself:

1) Emotionally strong people are less discouraged by setbacks and disappointments: they see each failure as an opportunity to learn and improvise over the last one. They compare themselves with themselves and define their own measures for failure and success. You could do an analysis of your strengths, limitations, opportunities and impediments in order to get over difficult situations. Geet, a student who didn’t get into his desired subject of IT, sat through 5 years of Law and did some extra courses in corporate law and worked towards fulfilling his dream of working in the Corporate. He felt confident, happy and satisfied with his efforts.

2) Emotionally strong people are more adaptable to change: they welcome and embrace changes in themselves and their environment simply because it brings newer opportunities and learning which can catapult them on their way to success. New boss, different stage of life, children going away are changes that will surely happen. Preparing for them in advance, can help people cope better with changes. When Surabhi got married, she took marital counselling to prepare for the differences that will crop up due to changes in the environment, thinking and attitudes of her inlaws family. She is a happy and successful wife and mother today.

3) Emotionally strong people are able to recognize and express their needs: ability to acknowledge and express your needs is being genuine to yourself and an expression of self care. People who are self aware move faster on the ladder of success as they are devoted and passionate towards their goals and needs. Taking care of your health and exercising along with a professional career makes for an emotionally strong person. You can become aware of your needs and values in counselling and experience contentment and power as you take charge of your life.

4) Emotionally strong people focus on getting around a hurdle rather than on the hurdle itself: focussing on the hurdle can be very emotionally draining and demotivating. Emotionally strong people invest their energies in working through a problem and looking for viable solutions, which ensures their victory over stresses and strains. If you have lost money in business, then working on your sales and marketing skills could get you better gains rather than feeling defeated. Counselling can help you look at problems objectively and from different perspectives. Get in touch with your problem solving skills and feel motivated and accomplished again.

5) Emotionally strong people can learn from mistakes and criticism: who hasn’t been subjected to criticism or made some mistakes? It’s human to err. Working towards excellence rather than perfection and looking for the golden piece of advice in the strong criticism helps emotionally strong people win over situations and important relationships. Sarita, an intelligent and smart woman ignored the critical remarks of her mother in law because she knew that there is a lot to learn from her. She knew which battles to fight and which ones to let go of.

6) Emotionally strong people tend to see the larger perspective in a challenging situation: They don’t get weighed down by smaller defeats when they have the larger picture in mind. An emotionally strong employee, Martin, who experienced office politics, kept his cool and focussed on his work.

7) Emotionally strong people are able to recover more quickly from emotional wounds such as failure or rejection: nobody can reject you unless you give them the permission. Seeing each failure as an opportunity to grow and learn helps. Staying with what you can do differently next time and having fall back plans helps to reduce the impact of failure. Thomas Edison didn’t get deterred by the number of times he could make his bulb glow. He kept looking at different permutations and combinations and kept learning from each mistake. Finally, his bulb glowed and now we all can benefit from the fruits of his hard labour.

If you don’t find yourself scoring high on this list, then there is no need to worry because in personal counselling, you can build emotional strength and capacity to bounce back by working on your mindset and learning more adaptable responses to stresses of daily living.

7 characteristics of emotionally strong people

Do you know why some people accomplish more and generally are much happier in their lives?
 
The field of Positive Psychology explains this. Research says, one of the signature strengths that such people have is "Gratitude. Gratitude makes them take better care of themselves physically and mentally. It also makes people engage in more proactive and healthy way. It promotes the motivation for exercise, healthy diet and willingness to wriggle out of any negative situations in life. It helps boost your immune system.  Since it makes you more optimistic and alert, you cope better with stress and feel healthier.

How to Have An Attitude of Gratitude?

1) Be Mindful of What You Have - Being thankful for very small things actually bring a great amount of joy. Have gratitude for small things like sunlight, rain, flowers, a cup of tea, a caring spouse, a child's laughter. It gives us the resilience to cope with tougher situations.

2) Keep a Gratitude Journal - Every night before going to bed, write down "What was the best thing that happened to you that day.  It fosters better sleep and a sense of well being and satisfaction.

3) Reframe Challenging Situations - It's not the situation but our perception of the situation that makes it challenging. You can reframe your reactions and respond by saying that "I may have a very demanding boss, but I have become more organized, patient. It will help you to attend to your work and be cheerful.

4) Practice saying Thank You - It's very simple. When you buy a bus ticket, just smile and say 'Thank You. Feel the first raindrops on your face and smile in gratitude for all the life it brings.

5) Focus your attention outwards - According to Emmons, a US psychology professor, people who are more aware of the positives in their lives tend to focus their attention outside of themselves. They feel complete, satisfied and fulfilled in their lives and are capable of helping the less fortunate ones.

If you have any questions, please click on "Consult Privately.

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5 Reasons Why Some People Accomplish More And Are Much Happier

In the modern day lifestyle, it is extremely difficult to be stress free. Even a tiny situation like losing your pen to a something like meeting a deadline at work can cause stress. Stress acts like a catalyst to different diseases like high cholesterol, hypertension, cardiac diseases, etc. You cannot avoid stress, but what you can do is help yourself fight it; and you can actually fight stress with the help of food as well. Here are a few food items which will help you with your fight against stress:

1. Chocolate: Chocolate is one of the best stress busters. It contains magnesium, phenyl ethyl amine and carbohydrates, all of which help lift your spirits. Chocolate helps in the reduction of stress hormones, helping you to relax.

2. Coffee: Coffee helps your brain signal the production of BDNF (a brain derived protein), which helps to keep your brain cells healthy. A low level of BDNF can cause a lot of stress and depression. Coffee triggers many neurotransmitters, which control your mood changes; so may be a cup or two of coffee will help your to be chirpier.

3. Green leafy vegetables: All green leafy vegetables like spinach contain a high quantity of magnesium. Magnesium prevents headaches and fatigue, which in turn reduces stress.

4. Black Tea: Black tea can relieve you of stress, quicker than any other food item. Black tea reduces the amount of cortisol, a hormone which causes stress, and gives you a feeling of calmness.

5. Milk: Milk contains calcium, which is known to ease anxiety and control sudden mood swings related to PMS or post menstrual stress.

6. Bananas: Bananas have a huge content of dopamine, which is a natural chemical that works towards boosting your mood. This is the same chemical released in your body after a session of working out. Bananas also have a lot of potassium and B group vitamins which work towards soothing your nervous system and a lot of magnesium which brings in positivity to your mood.

7. Almonds: Almonds are rich in vitamin E and group B vitamins, which will help you to be more resilient when you are depressed or anxious.

So if you are stressed out, pop in a few almonds or have a cup of tea, and release your stress.

7 Foods That Fight Stress

Do people really suffer from mood disorders?

Mood disorders are common psychological problems that affect a vast portion of the human populace all over the world every year. These occur when there is a shift or imbalance in a person's psyche which affects his or her daily function and interpersonal relations in varying degrees. Each individual is affected by these conditions in a different capacity and responds to them in a distinct manner.

Mood disorders generally manifest themselves as fluctuations in a person's temperament. It is triggered by various factors. These mental illnesses range from mild to severe, the latter requiring urgent psychological counseling and treatment. A mild condition may even develop into a painful and chronic one without any form of remedial intervention.

What are the most common types of mood disorders?

There are many distinctive categories of mood disorders that can affect a person. The most commonly occurring ones are as follows:

- major depressive disorder

- bipolar disorder

- dysthymia

- cyclothymia

- seasonal affective disorder (sad)

Major depression is the most frequently occurring type of mood disorder. It causes mental and emotional turmoil, as well as physical anguish. Those affected by it may experience a single episode in isolation or multiple episodes over a period of time. The milder version of this condition is known as dysthymia.

Bipolar disorder is a comparatively rare condition that causes alternating states of extreme mania and depression. It is also known as manic-depressive illness. The mild version of this is called cyclothymia.

Seasonal affective disorder or sad is a depressive disorder that is known to affect those living in colder climes. It is caused generally by the lack of warmth and light, the onset of which begins in late autumn and lasts till the end of winter.

What causes a mood disorder?

Mood disorders are very difficult to diagnose as they can be caused by an assortment of triggers and the symptoms are not always apparent. This is particularly true in the case of dysthymia and cyclothymia.

Some of the usual factors that lead to mood disorders are:

- chronic stress and anxiety

- anomalies in the functioning of the nervous system

- prolonged periods of isolation

- genetics

- childhood abuse and trauma

- ineffectual coping mechanisms

- insufficient nourishment/malnutrition

In most cases, a combination of multiple factors usually leads to the development of mood disorders and other mental illnesses.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'consult'.
Related Tip: 5 Mood Uplifting Foods You Must Keep Handy

Do People Really Suffer from Mood Disorders?

Are you a 'What-If' person? Kill anxiety in 4 easy ways

Thinking about dangers and risks is a normal phenomenon, it helps us to stay alert and to become a good problem solver. It’s only when worrying gets out of a person’s control, it turns into a problem. If a person is constantly preoccupied with “what-if " and keeps imagining worst-case scenarios, worry actually turns into the cause for high pulse rate, insomnia, poor mental and physical health. 

Here are 4 simple steps to cope with anxiety and worry.

1. Breathing technique: The first thing to do when you get anxious is to take deep breath. Deep breathing is a powerful anxiety-reducing technique because it activates the body’s relaxation response. Try slowly inhaling to a count of 5, filling your belly first and then your chest, gently holding your breath to a count of 5, and slowly exhaling to a count of 5 and repeat several times.

2. Accept that you’re anxious: Remember anxiety is just a feeling, like any other feeling, by reminding yourself that anxiety is simply an emotional reaction, you can start to accept it. Acceptance is critical because trying to eliminate anxiety often worsens it. But accepting your anxiety doesn’t mean liking it or resigning yourself to a miserable existence. It just means you would benefit by accepting reality as it is – and in that moment, reality means 'anxiety' you are feeling.

3. Question your worries. When people are anxious, most of the time their brains start coming up with all sorts of unrealistic ideas, which most likely will never occur. To avoid unnecessary worry, one should ask himself / herself a few questions like:
- Is there a reason to believe something is wrong?
- What evidence is there that something is wrong?
- If the worst possible outcome happens, what would be so bad about that?
- What are the options I can use to handle the situation at hand?


4. Focus on right now: When people are anxious, they are usually obsessing about something that might occur in the future. It is important that when a person becomes anxious, he/she takes a deep breath and pay attention to what’s happening right now, around them. Even if something serious is happening, focusing on the present moment will improve your ability to manage the situation.

If you would like to consult with me privately, please click on 'Consult'.

From Lybrate: If you found this tip useful, please thank the doctor by clicking on the heart icon below. Also, spread good health by sharing this tip with your loved ones over WhatsApp, Facebook and other media.

Are you a 'What-If' person? Kill anxiety in 4 easy ways

When it comes to the brain, simple yet easy to make juices can make a lot of difference. These juices not only improve your memory, but are of great help to the cognitive functions as well. While green tea is a known component of increased brain function, there are other drinks too, which can charge your brain over the long term if consumed daily:

Beet juice: Apart from being a nutritional powerhouse, beet juice is a great source of nitric acid. The latter helps with blood flow in the body. A smooth blood flow, on the other hand, helps the brain in functioning properly. A study has found that people who consume beet juice have an increased circulation in the white matter resulting from an increased brain activity. This juice is sweet in taste and can be consumed every alternate day.
Berry Smoothies: Acai is a fruit which has a South African origin and hits the top of the list when it comes to brain assisting food. It increases the flow of the blood and dilates the blood vessels. However, this is extremely expensive. Berries also have a similar effect on the brain, but they are less powerful in nature. What can be done is to mix a little ingredient of Acai in frozen berries juice and drink the same every day. Frozen berries retain the freshness and the nutritional benefits. This drink will improvise your brain and increase blood flow in the body.
Pomegranate juice: Pomegranate is a great antioxidant and it very aptly limits the free radicals from damaging the brain cells. Antioxidants are also credited with increased blood flow and protection of the heart. A healthy cardiovascular system is synonymous to an increased brain function. What is surprising is the fact that Pomegranate has more antioxidant content compared to red wine and green tea. Pomegranate juice can be consumed daily during the morning or afternoon.
Carrot juice: Carrot is known for its healthy components that are beneficial for the eyes. Recent studies have revealed that they are great for the brain too. Like other colored vegetables, they are a great source of antioxidant and have a high content of beta-carotene. Carrot juice can reduce the inflammation of the brain cells and improve memory. Carrot juice is not at all bitter and the same can be consumed every alternate day after your meal.
Cocoa: A Harvard study revealed that two cups of cocoa on a daily basis greatly helps a person in improving memory. Cocoa contains flavanols that keep the blood pressure normal and relaxes the blood vessel linings. Cocoa is also known to be a great antioxidant agent that limits the free radical to affect the brain cells. Cocoa should not be overloaded with sugar and should be consumed hot before starting your day.

5 Super Brain Drinks that Boost Your Memory

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